# Friends.S01E01.1994.BluRay.1080p.x265.10bit.MNHD-FRDS.txt  没什么好说的 他只不过是我的同事 There's nothing to tell. It's just some guy I work with. 少来了 和你交往的男人… Come on. You're going out with a guy. 多多少少一定有点问题 There's gotta be something wrong with him. 他既驼背又戴假发？ So does he have a hump and a hair piece? 等一下 他是不是会吃粉笔？ Wait. Does he eat chalk? 我只是不希望你重蹈我和卡尔的覆辙 I don't want her to go through what I went through with Carl. Oh. 各位放轻松 这不算约会 Okay, everybody relax. This is not even a date. 不过是两个人一起出去吃晚餐 而且不上床 It's just two people going out to dinner and not having sex. 对我来说这就是约会 Sounds like a date to me. 做了个梦 在中学时代 我站在餐厅中央… I'm back in high school, in the middle of the cafeteria... 突然发现自己全身赤裸 ...and I realize I'm totally naked. - 对 没错 - 我做过那样的梦 - Oh, yeah. - I've had that dream. 我低头一看 看见有一个电话… Then I look down and I realize there is a phone... 在那里 ...there. - 而不是… - 没错 - Instead of... - That's right! - 我没做过那样的梦 - 没有 - That one, I've never had. - No. 突然 那个电话响了 All of a sudden, the phone starts to ring. 结果是我妈妈打来的 And it turns out it's my mother. 这非常奇怪 因为她从来都不会打电话给我 Which is very, very weird because she never calls me. 嗨 Hi. 这家伙说"嗨"的时候 我却想杀了我自己 This guy says "hello," I wanna kill myself. 你还好吧 亲爱的？ Are you okay, sweetie? 我就感觉好像某人伸手进我的喉咙 I feel like someone reached my throat, 抓住我的小肠 从我的嘴里拉出来 grabbed my small intestine, pulled it out of my mouth... - 再在我的脖子上打结… - 要吃饼干吗？ - ...and tied it around my neck. - Cookie? 卡萝今天搬走了她的东西 Carol moved her stuff out today. - 我给你拿杯咖啡 - 谢谢 - Let me get you some coffee. - Thanks. 不 不要 不要清理我的光环 No. No, don't! Stop cleansing my aura. 不要管我的光环 好吗？ Just leave my aura alone, okay? 我会没事的 好吗？真的 我希望她开心 I'll be fine. All right? Really. I hope she'll be very happy. - 不 你并不希望 - 是的 我不希望 - No, you don't. - No, I don't. 叫她去死 是她离开了我 To hell with her. She left me! 你从来都不知道她是女同性恋 And you never knew she was a lesbian. 不知道 行了吧 No! Okay? 为什么每个人老是要提出来？ Why does everyone keep fixating on that? 她都不知道 我又怎么会知道？ She didn't know. How should I know? 有时候我希望我是女同性恋… Sometimes I wish I was a lesbian. 我讲得很大声吗？ Did I say that out loud? 没事的 罗斯 你现在感到很痛苦 All right, Ross. Look, you're feeling a lot of pain right now. 你很生气 很伤心 You're angry. You're hurting. 我能告诉你解决方法是什么吗？ Can I tell you what the answer is? 脱衣舞厅 Strip joints! 别这样 你单身了 有需求的 Come on, you're single. Have some hormones. 我不想单身 好吗？ See, but I don't want to be single, okay? 我只想…再次结婚 I just wanna be married again. 而我只想要一百万美金 And I just want a million dollars! 瑞秋 Rachel? 噢 老天爷 摩妮卡 感谢上帝 Oh, God, Monica! Hi! Thank God! 我刚到你那里去 而你不在 那个拿着大锤子的家伙说... I went to your building and this guy with a hammer said... 你可能在这里 你真在这里 ...that you might be here, and you are. - 你想喝点咖啡吗？- 无咖啡因的 - Can I get you some coffee? - Decaf. 好了 各位 这位是瑞秋 另一个林肯高中的幸存者 Okay, everybody, this is Rachel, another Lincoln High survivor. 这就是各位 这是钱德 菲比 This is everybody. This is Chandler and Phoebe... 乔伊 还有 你还记得我哥哥罗斯吗？ ...and Joey. And remember my brother, Ross? - 当然 - 嘿 - Sure! - Hey. - 嗨 - 天啊 - Hi. - Oh, God. 那你现在可以告诉我们了吗？ So you wanna tell us now, 还是说我们在等着四位湿漉的伴娘？ or are we waiting for four wet bridesmaids? 好吧 大概在婚礼前半个小时 Oh, God! Well, it started about a half-hour before the wedding. 我在礼物间里 I was in this room with all the presents... 看着那个肉汁壶 ...and I was looking at this gravy boat. 那是个非常好看的肉汁壶 This really gorgeous Limoges gravy boat. 然后 突然…有代糖吗？ When all of a sudden... Sweet 'N Low? 我发现… I realized... 我对这个肉汁壶 比对巴瑞更有冲动 ...I was more turned on by this gravy boat than by Barry. 然后我吓呆了 然后这个想法突然出现在脑中: Then I got really freaked out, and that's when it hit me: 巴瑞看起来多像洋芋头先生啊 How much Barry looks like Mr. Potato Head. 我总是觉得他眼熟 但是… You know, I mean, I always knew he looked familiar, but... 总之 我必须离开那里 我在想: Anyway, I just had to get out of there, and I started wondering: "我为什么这样做？我为谁这样做？" "Why am I doing this?" And "Who am I doing this for?" 我不知道该去哪里 而且我知道我和你有点疏远了 Anyway, I just didn't know where to go, and I know you and I have drifted apart... 但你是我这个城市里唯一认识的人 ...but you're the only person I know in the city. 而且没有受邀参加你的婚礼 Who wasn't invited to the wedding. 噢 我希望你不会把它当一回事… Oh, I was kind of hoping that wouldn't be an issue. 我猜他给她买了个管风琴 I'm guessing he bought her the big pipe organ... 而她很不喜欢那个 ...and she's really not happy about it. 老爸 我就是无法和他结婚 Daddy, I just... I can't marry him. 对不起 I'm sorry. 我只是不爱他了 I just don't love him. 这对我很有关系 Well, it matters to me. 她真不应该穿那条裤子 She should not be wearing those pants. 我觉得应该把她推下楼 I say push her down the stairs. 把她推下楼… Push her down the stairs! Push her down the stairs! 爸爸 听我说 Come on, Daddy, listen to me! 这就好像在我一生中 所有人都告诉我: "你是鞋子 " It's like all of my life, everyone's always told me, "You're a shoe! "你是鞋子…" You're a shoe! You're a shoe! You're a shoe!" 然后今天 我停下来对自己说: "如果我不想成为鞋子呢？ Then today I stopped and said, "What if I don't wanna be a shoe? 如果我想成为一个包包？ What if I wanna be a purse? You know? 或一顶帽子？" Or a hat?" 不 我不是要你给我买帽子 我是说我是帽子 I don't want you to buy me a hat, I am a hat. 这是个比喻 爸爸 It's a metaphor, Daddy! 你看得出他哪里听不懂 You can see where he'd have trouble. 爸爸 这是我的生活 Look, Daddy, it's my life. 也许我可以和摩妮卡住在一起 Well, maybe I'll just stay here with Monica. 我猜我们已经确定 她要和摩妮卡住在一起了 I guess we've established she's staying with Monica. 也许那是我的决定 Well, maybe that's my decision. 也许我不需要你的钱 Well, maybe I don't need your money. 等等 我说也许 Wait! Wait! I said maybe! 呼吸 呼吸 好 就这样 Okay. Just breathe, that's it. 试着想一些让你镇定的事… Just try to think of nice, calm things. 玫瑰上的雨滴 还有猫的胡须 Raindrops on roses And whiskers on kittens 门铃和雪橇铃 还有手套 Doorbells and sleigh bells And something with mittens 啦啦啦 还有一些条状物 La la la something With string 我现在好多了 I'm all better now. 我帮上忙啦 I helped. 瞧 这也许对你来讲是最好的 知道吗？ Look, this is probably for the best, you know? 独立了 把握自己的生活 Independence. Taking control of your life. 还有 你还需要什么 你可以随时来找乔伊 And, hey, if you need anything, you can always come to Joey. 我和钱德就住在对面 而且他经常不在 Me and Chandler live right across the hall. And he's away a lot. 乔伊 不要再对她放电了 今天是她结婚的日子 Joey, stop hitting on her. It's her wedding day. 怎么啦 难道这还有什么规定吗？ What? Like there's a rule or something? 请不要再按了 那是很恐怖的声音 Please don't do that again. It's a horrible sound. - 我是保罗 - 让他进来 - Uh, it's Paul. - Buzz him in. - 谁是保罗？- 保罗 红酒达人 保罗？ - Who's Paul? - Paul, the wine guy, Paul? 也许 Maybe. 等等 你今晚的"不是真正约会" 是和红酒达人保罗？ Wait a minute. Your "not a real date" is with Paul, the wine guy? - 他终于约你出去啦？- 是的 - He finally asked you out? - Yes. 真是个可以写入日记的时刻 Ooh. This is a "Dear Diary" moment. 瑞秋 等等 我可以取消 Rach, wait, I can cancel. 不用 你去吧 我不会有事的 Please, no. Go, I'll be fine. 罗斯 你没事吧？你希望我留下来吗？ Ross, are you okay? I mean, do you want me to stay? 能留下就太好了 That'd be good. - 真的？- 不 去吧 那可是红酒达人保罗耶 - Really? - No, go on! It's Paul, the wine guy. 进来 保罗 这是… Hi, come in. Paul, this is... 大家 各位 这是保罗 ...everybody. Everybody, this is Paul. 保罗 红酒达人 Paul, the wine guy. - 红酒达人 - 我没听清楚你的名字 是保罗吗？ - Wine guy. - I didn't catch your name. Paul, was it? - 请坐 两秒钟就好 - 好 - Okay. Sit down. Two seconds. - Okay. 我刚拔掉四根睫毛 不是个好兆头 Ooh, I just pulled out four eyelashes. That can't be good. 那么瑞秋 你今晚打算做什么？ So, Rachel, what are you up to tonight? 我本来应该到阿鲁巴度蜜月 Well, I was supposed to be headed for Aruba on my honeymoon... 所以 没事做 ...so, nothing. 对呀 你连蜜月都无法去 Right. You're not even getting your honeymoon. 不过 阿鲁巴 这个时候？ God. No, no. Although, Aruba. Heh. This time of year? Eh. 你可以谈论一下… Talk about your... 大蜥蜴 ...big lizards. 总之 如果今晚你不想自己一个人的话 Anyway, if you don't feel like being alone tonight... 乔伊和钱德要过来 帮我组装我的新家具 ...Joey and Chandler are helping me with my furniture. 对 而且我们为此感到兴奋 Yes, and we're very excited about it. 谢谢了 不过我想今晚还是留在这里吧 Actually, thanks, but I'm just gonna hang out here tonight. - 今天真是漫长的一天 - 是呀 好吧 - It's been a long day. - Oh, sure. Okay. Sure. 菲比 你要来帮忙吗？ Hey, Pheebs, you wanna help? 噢 我希望我能 但是我不想 Oh, I wish I could, but I don't want to. 我应该把支架固定在侧面 I'm supposed to attach a bracket-y thing to the side things... 用螺纹涡轮 ...using a bunch of these little worm guys. 我没有支架 没有看到螺纹涡轮 I have no bracket-y thing, I see no worm guys whatsoever... 而且我的腿麻了 ...and I cannot feel my legs. 这是什么？ What's this? 我不知道 I have no idea. - 搞定书架了 - 完工了 - Done with the bookcase. - All finished. 这是卡萝最喜欢的啤酒 This was Carol's favorite beer. 她总是直接从罐子喝 我该知道的 She always drank it out of the can. I should have known. 罗斯 我来问你一个问题 Hey. Ross, let me ask you a question. 她得到家具、音响、超赞的电视 She got the furniture, the stereo, the good TV. 那你得到了什么？ What did you get? 你们啊 You guys. - 天呀 - 你被耍了 - Oh, God. Oh, my God. - You got screwed. - 我的老天 - 我知道 我真是个笨蛋 - Oh, my God. - I know, I know. I'm such an idiot. 当她一个礼拜见四、五次牙医 我就该知道了 I should've caught on when she went to the dentist four and five times a week. 谁的牙齿需要这么干净？ I mean, how clean can teeth get? 我哥哥正在克服这种事呢 他真是一团糟 My brother's going through that. He's such a mess. 你是怎么克服的？ How did you get through it? 他可以试着砸烂她的一些贵重的东西 He might try accidentally breaking something valuable of hers. - 比如她的… - 腿？ - Say her... - Leg? 那样也可以 Heh. That's one way of going through it, yeah. 我则是砸了她的手表 Me, I went for the watch. - 真的砸了她的手表？ - 嗯 - You actually broke her watch? - Mm. 巴瑞 对不起 对不起 Barry, I'm sorry. I am so sorry. 我知道你可能认为和那天我对你说 I know you probably think it's about what I said 跟你穿袜子做爱有关 但不是的 that you making love with your socks on, but it isn't. 这和我有关 我只是… It isn't, it's about me. And I... 嘿 机器又把电话挂断了 不管怎样… Hi. Machine cut me off again. Anyway... 知道什么最吓人的吗？ You know what's scary? 如果每个人只有一个女人适合他呢？ What if there's only one woman for everybody? 我是说 如果你得到一个女人 就这样 I mean, what if you get one woman, and that's it? 不幸的是 以我的例子来讲 是她…得到一个女人 Unfortunately, in my case, there was only one woman for her. 你在说什么？"一个女人"？ What are you talking about? One woman. 那就好像你只吃一种口味的冰淇淋 That's like saying there's only one flavor of ice cream for you. 让我告诉你 罗斯 还有很多种口味 Let me tell you something, Ross. There's lots of flavors out there. 有碎糖口味、饼干口味 然后还有香草口味 There's rocky road and cookie dough and bing cherry vanilla. 还可以加糖条、果仁 或者鲜奶油一起吃 You can get them with jimmies or nuts or whipped cream. 这是你一生中最棒的时刻了 This is the best thing that ever happened to you. 你难道是八岁结婚的？ You got married. You were like, what, 8? 欢迎回到现实里 拿起汤匙 Welcome back to the world. Grab a spoon. 我真不知道我是饿了 还是饥渴 I honestly don't know if I'm hungry or horny. 离我的冰箱远点 Then stay out of my freezer. 从她离开我之后 我… Ever since she walked out on me, I... 怎么啦？ What? What? 你想边吃面条边讲出来？ You wanna spell it out with noodles? 不 这本该在和你第五次约会时才能说出来的 No, it's more of a fifth date kind of revelation. 噢 所以会有第五次约会啰？ Oh, so there's gonna be a fifth date? 会有吗？ Isn't there? 我觉得会有 Yeah, yeah. I think there is. 你要说什么？ What were you gonna say? 好吧 Well... Er, uh... 自从她离开我之后… Ever since she left me, um... 我就一直… ...I haven't been able to perform... 无法行房 ...sexually. 天啊 对不起 Oh, God! Oh, God! I am so... - 对不起… - 没关系 - I'm so sorry. - It's okay. 被人吐水应该不是你现在需要的 Being spit on is probably not what you need right now. 多久了？ How long? 两年 Two years. 我真高兴你砸了她的手表 I'm glad you smashed her watch. 那你还希望有第五次约会吗？ So you still think you might want that fifth date? 是的 Yeah. 是的 我希望 Yeah, I do. 我乔安妮 接受查理斯为我的合法丈夫 I, Joanie, take you, Charles, as my lawful husband. - 你是否接受乔安妮… - 看吧 - Do you take Joanie...? - Oh! See. 可是乔安妮爱佳奇 就是这里不同 But Joanie loved Chachi. That's the difference. "拿起汤匙" "Grab a spoon." 你知道我多久没拿汤匙了吗？ Do you know long it's been since I grabbed a spoon? "比利 别逞英雄" 这句话对你有没有意义？ Do the words, "Billy, don't be a hero," mean anything to you? 是这样的 就算我想… You know, here's the thing. Even if I could get it together enough... 约一个女人出来 ...to ask a woman out... 我该约谁？ ...who am I gonna ask? 是不是很不可思议？ Isn't this amazing? 我以前从来没泡过咖啡 I mean, I have never made coffee before in my life. - 是很不可思议 - 恭喜你 - That is amazing. - Congratulations. 你现在刚好有心情 有没有想做个蛋饼之类的东西… While you're on a roll, if you feel like you gotta make a Western omelet or something... 不过我还不太饿… Although, actually I'm really not that hungry this morning. - 早安 - 早安 - Good morning. - Good morning. - 早安 - 早安 - Morning. - Morning. - 早安 - 早安 保罗 - Morning. - Morning, Paul. - 你好 保罗 - 嘿 是保罗 对吗？ - Hello, Paul. - Hi. Paul, is it? 我昨晚很开心 I had a really great time last night. 谢谢你 太感谢你了 Thank you. Thank you so much. - 再聊 - 好的 - We'll talk later, okay? - Yeah. 谢谢 Thank you. 那不是真正的约会 That wasn't a real date. 那你真正的约会都在干什么？ What the hell do you do on a real date? - 闭嘴 把我的桌子搬回去 - 好的 - Shut up and put my table back. - Okay. 好啦 孩子们 我要去工作啦 All right, kids, I gotta get to work. 不过如果我不把那些数字输入 也不会有什么差别 If I don't input those numbers, it doesn't make much of a difference. 你们都有工作吗？ So, like, you guys all have jobs? 对 我们都有 Yeah, we all have jobs. 这样我们才有钱买东西 See, that's how we buy stuff. 对 我是演员 Yeah, I'm an actor. 我有见过你的作品吗？ Wow. Would I have seen you in anything? 应该没有 大部分是地方性节目 Oh, I doubt it. Mostly regional work. 等等 除非你看过翻拍的《木偶奇遇记》 Unless you happened to catch the Wee One's production of Pinocchio. "瞧 老木匠 我是个真正的小男孩" "Look, Geppeto. I'm a real live boy." 别这样羞辱我 I will not take this abuse. 没错 对不起 You're right. I'm sorry. 我曾经是个小木偶… Once I was a wooden boy A little wooden boy 你今天怎么样？睡得好吗？ So how are you doing today? Did you sleep okay? 和巴端谈过吗？我无法停止微笑 Did you talk to Barry? I can't stop smiling. 看得出来 就好像你睡觉时 有个衣架在你嘴里 I can see that. You look like you slept with a hanger in your mouth. 我知道 他只是太… I know. He's just so... 你还记得你和托尼多马哥吗？ Remember you and Tony De Marco? - 是的 记得 - 就好像那样 但有感觉 - Oh, yeah. - Well, it's like that. With feelings. 哇 你有麻烦了 Oh, wow, are you in trouble! 好 我要醒过来 去工作 Okay, okay. I am just going to get up, go to work... 而且不要整天想着他 ...and not think about him all day. 或者只是站起来去工作 Or else I'm just gonna get up and go to work. - 喔 祝我好运 - 为什么？ - Oh, wish me luck! - What for? 我要去找工作之类的事 I'm gonna go get one of those job things. - 嘿 摩妮卡 - 嘿 弗兰妮 欢迎回来 - Hey, Monica. - Hey, Franny. Welcome back. 佛罗里达怎么样？ How was Florida? 你跟人上床了 对吧？ You had sex, didn't you? 你怎么知道的？ How do you do that? - 那么 是和谁？- 你认识保罗吗？ - So, who? - You know Paul? 保罗 红酒达人？ Paul, the wine guy? 是的 我认识保罗 Oh, yeah, I know Paul. 你认识他就好像我认识他一样？ You mean, you know Paul like I know Paul? 你开玩笑吧？保罗还欠我人情呢 Are you kidding? I take credit for Paul. 在我之前 他两年都无法行房 Before me, there was no snap in his turtle for two years. 那当然是谎言 Of course it was a line. 为什么？为什么有人会做这样的事情？ Why? Why would anybody do something like that? 我想更精确的答案是 We're looking for an answer more sophisticated than: "为了和你上床" "To get you into bed." 是因为我吗？ Is it me? 是因为我会散发某种信号吗？ Is it like I have some sort of beacon that only dogs... 只有狗和有感情问题的男人 才会感应到？ ...and men with severe emotional problems can hear? 好啦 过来这里 把你的脚给我 All right, come here. Give me your feet. 我只是以为他是个好人 I just thought he was nice, you know? 我真不敢相信 你不知道那是谎言 I can't believe you didn't know it was a line. 猜猜怎么样？ Guess what. - 你找到工作啦？- 开玩笑吗？ - You got a job? - Are you kidding? 我一点经验都没有 I'm trained for nothing. 我今天被十二个面试员嘲笑 I was laughed out of 12 interviews today. 而且你还这么高兴 Yet you're surprisingly upbeat. 你也会高兴的 如果你发现名牌皮靴特价… Well, you would be too if you found Joan and David boots on sale... 打五折 ...50 percent off. 是呀 你真了解我… Oh, how well you know me. 这双是 "我不需要工作 我不需要父母 They're my new "I don't need a job or my parents. 我买了新皮靴"的皮靴 I've got great boots" boots. - 你用什么付帐的？- 信用卡 - How'd you pay for them? - Uh, credit card. 那谁付帐单呢？ And who pays for that? 我爸爸 Um, my father. 你不能靠你爸爸过一辈子 You can't live off your parents your whole life. 我知道 这就是为什么我要结婚 I know that. That's why I was getting married. 别逼她 第一次独立生活是很困难的 Give her a break. It's hard being on your own for the first time. - 谢谢你 - 别客气 - Thank you. - You're welcome. 记得我第一次来这个城市 我才十四岁 I remember when I first came to this city, I was 14. 我妈妈刚自杀 我的继父又进了监狱 My mom had killed herself and my stepdad was back in prison. 然后在这里我不认识任何人 And I got here, and I didn't know anybody. 然后我和一个在港务局给人擦车窗的… I ended up living with this albino guy who was cleaning windshields... 白化病人住在一起 最后他也自杀了 ...outside Port Authority. And then he killed himself. 然后我找到按摩这份工作 所以相信我 我完全了解你的威受 And then I found aromatherapy. So believe me, I know exactly how you feel. 你想说的话是: The word you're looking for is: "总之…" "Anyway..." 好了 准备好了吗？ All right. You ready? - 还没有 - 来吧 - I don't think so. - Oh, come on. 剪掉 剪掉 Cut. Cut. 剪掉 剪掉 剪掉 Cut, cut, cut. - 嘿 - 好耶 - Hey. - All right. 欢迎来到真实世界 Welcome to the real world. 它很糟糕 但是你会喜欢的 It sucks. You're gonna love it. 好啦 够啦 你要在沙发上睡？ Well, that's it. You gonna crash on the couch? - 不 我总要回家啊 - 你还好吗？ - No. No, I gotta go home sometime. - Are you gonna be okay? 是的 Yeah. 看我刚才在地板上发现了什么 Look what I just found on the floor. 什么？ What? 那是保罗的手表 That's Paul's watch. 你就把它放回原处吧 You can just put it back where you found it. 好吧 晚安 各位 Oh, boy. All right. Good night, everybody. 晚安 Good night. - 哦 抱歉 - 不 你来 - Oh, sorry. - No. Oh, no. Go. - 不 你吃吧 - 平分？ - No, have it, really. - Split it? - 好吧 - 好吧 - Okay. - Okay. 谢谢 Thanks. 你可能不知道 在高中… You probably didn't know this, but back in high school I had... 我曾暗恋过你 ...a major crush on you. 我知道 I knew. 你知道？ You did? Oh. 我还以为你一直认为 我是摩妮卡的书呆子哥哥呢 I figured you thought I was Monica's geeky older brother. 我是这么认为的 I did. 听着 你是不是认为… Listen, do you think... 你不要太在意我的脆弱 这已经成为习惯 And try not to let my vulnerability become any kind of a factor here. 但是你认为我可以约你出去吗？ Do you think it would be okay if I ask you out sometime, maybe? 可以啊 Yeah. 也许 Maybe. 好 Okay. 好吧 我可能会约你 Okay, maybe I will. - 晚安 - 晚安 - Good night. - Good night. 再见 See you. 等等 你怎么啦？ Wait, wait. Hey, what's with you? 我刚刚拿起汤匙 I just grabbed a spoon. 我真不敢相信我听到的 Can't believe what I'm hearing. 我真不敢相信我听到的 I can't believe What I'm hearing here - 怎么啦 我说你有个 - 我说你有个… - What? I said you had... - What? I said you had... - 有完没完？ - 我的老毛病又犯了？ - Would you stop? - Oh, was I doing it again? 没错 Yes. 有人要咖啡吗？ Would anybody like more coffee? 你泡的 还是你只是端过来？ Did you make it or are you just serving it? - 只是端过来 - 好吧 我要杯咖啡 - I'm just serving it. - I'll have a cup of coffee. 孩子们 新的梦 Kids, new dream. 我在拉斯维加斯 我是丽莎•明妮莉… I'm in Las Vegas. I'm Liza Minnelli. # Friends.S01E02.1994.BluRay.1080p.x265.10bit.MNHD-FRDS.txt 男生不了解 What you guys don't understand is... 对我们来说 接吻跟其他部份一样重要 ...for us, kissing is as important as any part of it. 对 没错 Yeah, right. 真的吗？ You serious? 对 Oh, yeah. 初吻能告诉你所有答案 Everything you need to know is in that first kiss. - 没错 - 我想对我们来说 - Absolutely. - Yeah, I think, for us... 接吻只是开场 ...kissing is pretty much like an opening act. 像是你得忍受搞笑艺人那一段 I mean, it's like the stand-up comedian you have to sit through... 才能等到平克•佛洛伊德登场 ...before Pink Floyd comes out. 对 我们不是不喜欢搞笑艺人 Yeah, and it's not that we don't like the comedian. 但那不是 It's just that that's not... 我们买票想看的表演 ...why we bought the ticket. 听着 问题是 See, the problem is, though... 演唱会结束后 不论表演有多棒 ...after the concert's over, no matter how great the show was... 女生还在找搞笑艺人 ...you girls are always looking for the comedian again. 我是说我们在车里 对抗塞车 I mean, we're in the car, we're fighting traffic... 努力保持清醒 ...basically just trying to stay awake. 对 听我的建议 把搞笑艺人找回来 Yeah, well, word of advice: Bring back the comedian. 不然你会发现自己 Otherwise, you're gonna find yourself... 一个人坐在家里听专辑 ...sitting at home listening to that album alone. 我们还在讨论性爱吗？ Are we still talking about sex? 不 真的很不错 No, it's good. It is good. 你不觉得她看起来有点愤怒吗？ It's just that, doesn't she seem a little angry? 她有问题 Well, she has issues. 是吗？ Does she? 他跑出去跟别的女人胡搞 He's out banging other women over the head with a club... 她待在家里 想除掉地毯上乳齿象的味道 ...while she sits at home trying to get the mastodon smell out of the carpet. 玛莎 他们是原始人 Marsha, see, these are cave people. 好吧 这才是他们的问题 Okay, they have issues like: "天啊 冰河距离有点近" 懂吗？ "Gee, that glacier's getting kind of close." See? 说到问题 那不是你的前妻吗？ Speaking of issues, isn't that your ex-wife? - 不 - 没错 卡萝 - No, no. - Yes, it is. Carol, hi. 对 没错 Okay. Yes. Yes, it is. 我们何不等到冰河时期再谈？ How about I'll catch up with you in the Ice Age? - 嗨 - 嗨 - Hi. - Hi. 好吧 So... 你看起来很不错 You look great. 我讨厌那样 I hate that. 抱歉 谢谢 你看起来也很不错 Sorry. Thanks. You look good too. 在这里所有可以... Well, you know, in here, anyone who... 直立的人 ...stands erect... - 怎么样？你还是… - 女同志？ - So, what's new? Still a... - A lesbian? 好吧 Well... 这种事谁都说不准 You never know. 你家人还好吧？ How's, um...? How's the family? 玛蒂的疑心病还是很重 Marty's still totally paranoid. - 还有… - 卡萝 你来这里做什么？ - Oh, and... - Carol, why are you here, Carol? - 我怀孕了 - 怀孕？ - I'm pregnant. - Pregnant. 看起来她不急着离开 Oh. Looks like she didn't leave in such a hurry after all. 我想这一集的《三人行》 I think this is the episode of Three's Company... 发生了一点误会 ...where's there's some kind of misunderstanding. 我看过这一集了 Then I've already seen this one. 你喝完了吗？谢谢 Are you through with that? Thanks. 抱歉 狼吞虎咽害我速度变慢 Yeah, sorry, the swallowing slowed me down. 这是谁的纸团？ Whose little ball of paper is this? 那应该是我的 Oh, that would be mine. 我写字条给自己 后来又不需要 See, I wrote a note to myself, then I didn't need it. 我把它揉成纸团 现在我真的很想死 So I balled it up and now I wish I was dead. 她已经拍过靠枕了 摩妮卡 你已经拍过 She already fluffed that pillow. Monica, you know, you already fluffed... 没关系的 But it's fine. 听着 抱歉 Look, I'm sorry. 我不想给他们能攻击我的地方 I don't want to give them any more ammunition than they have. 对 我们知道父母会多么挑剔 Yes, we know how cruel a parent can be... 小孩家的靠枕太扁了 ...about the flatness of a child's pillow. 摩妮卡 Monica? Hi. Um... 摩妮卡 你吓到我了 Monica, um, you're scaring me. 你神经兮兮的 非常可怕 I mean, you're, like, all chaotic and twirly, you know? 那不是件好事 Not in a good way. 对 冷静下来 Yeah, calm down. 每次他们来这里 你不会看到罗斯 神经兮兮的 非常可怕 You don't see Ross getting all chaotic and twirly every time they come. 那是因为我爸妈认为 罗斯绝不会犯错 That's because, as far as my parents are concerned, Ross can do no wrong. 他是我们家的王子 You see, he's the prince. 显然我出生前 他们举行过非常重要的仪式 Apparently they had some big ceremony before I was born. 呃… Ew, ew, ew. - 什么？ - 丑裸男在用瘦腿器 - What? - Ugly Naked Guy got a ThighMaster. 喔 Ew. - 谁看到我的订婚戒指了？ - 对 它真的很漂亮 - Has anybody seen my engagement ring? - Yeah, it's beautiful. 天啊 Oh, God. Oh, God. - 天啊 - 不 别碰那个 - Oh, God, oh, God, oh, God. - No, don't touch that. 我恐怕明天得把它还给他 Oh, like I wasn't dreading tomorrow enough having to give it back to him. 贝瑞 记得我吗？ "Hi, Barry, remember me? I'm the girl... 我是在你家人面前伤了你心的女孩 ...that stomped on your heart in front of your entire family" 天啊 现在我得归还戒指 戒指却不见了 Oh, God. Now I'm gonna have to return the ring, without the ring... 那让情况变得更复杂 ...which makes it so much harder. 别紧张 瑞秋 我们会找到它的 对吧？ Easy, Rach, we'll find it. Won't we? - 对 - 好吧 听着 - Oh, yeah. - Okay, look. 你最后一次戴上它 是什么时候的事？ When did you have it on last? 或许就在她把它弄丢之前 Doy. Probably right before she lost it. 现在的人很难开得起玩笑 You don't get a lot of "doy" these days. 我知道今天早上我还戴着它 I know I had it this morning. 我知道我在厨房里还戴着它 I know I had it when I was in the kitchen with... 在晚餐里？ Dinah? 别生气 Oh, don't be mad. - 不可能 - 对不起 - You didn't. - Oh, I'm sorry. 我交代你做一件事 I gave you one job. 看看那些面条有多直 Oh, but look how straight those noodles are. 摩妮卡 那样子无法在千层面里 找到订婚戒指的 Monica, you know that's not how you look for an engagement ring in a lasagna. 我没办法那么做 I just can't do it. 兄弟们 Boys? 轮到我们上了 We're going in. 嗨 Hi. 你似乎不太开心 Oh, that is not a happy "hi." 卡萝怀孕了 Carol's pregnant. 我找到了 Oh, I found it. 什么？ Well, what...? What? 对 Yeah. 再多撑个两小时 Do that for another two hours... 你的处境会跟我一样 ...you might be where I am right about now. 原来靠枕有那个功能 摩妮卡 Kind of puts that whole pillow thing in perspective, huh, Mon? 你打算怎么办？ Well, now, how do you fit into this whole thing? 卡萝说她跟苏珊都希望我能参与 Well, Carol says she and Susan want me to be involved. 如果我觉得为难也可以不参与 But if I'm not comfortable with it, I don't have to be involved. 基本上由我来决定 Basically, it's totally up to me. 她太棒了 我想念她 She is so great. I miss her. 她说的参与是什么意思？ What does she mean by "involved"? 我想你完成最重要的工作了 I mean, presumably, the biggest part of your job is done. 她们要我明天... Anyway, they want me to go down to this... 陪她们去做超声波检查 ...sonogram thing with them tomorrow. 你打算怎么办？ So, what are you gonna do? 我不知道 I have no idea. 不论我怎么做 我还是要当爸爸了 No matter what I do, though, I'm still gonna be a father. 千层面已经毁了 对吧？ Well, this is still ruined, right? 玛莎•路格温的女儿要打电话给你 Oh. Martha Lugwin's daughter is gonna call you. 那是什么咖哩的味道？ Mm. What's that curry taste? 就是咖哩 Curry. 唔 Mm. 我觉得很棒 真的 I think they're great. I really do. 还记得路格温家吧？ You remember the Lugwins? 大女生曾暗恋你 对吧？ The big one had a thing for you, didn't she? 她们都暗恋他 They all had a thing for him. 妈 Oh, Mom. 对不起 这个女孩为什么要打电话给我？ I'm sorry. Why is this girl going to call me? 她刚毕业 想在餐饮界或食品界做事 Oh, she just graduated, and she wants to be something in cooking or food... 我不知道 ...or I don't know. 总之我跟她说你开了一家餐厅 Anyway, I told her you had a restaurant, so... 不 妈 我没有开餐厅 我在餐厅里工作 No, Mom. I don't have a restaurant. I work in a restaurant. 他们不必知道那么多 Well, they don't have to know that. 罗斯 麻烦你过来帮我弄意大利面 Ross, could you come and help me with the spaghetti. 好的 Yes. 我们要吃意大利面 那真是... Oh, we're having spaghetti. That's... 太轻松了 ...easy. 我知道听起来我真的很自私 I know this is going to sound unbelievably selfish on my part... 你打算提起宝宝跟女同志的事吗？ ...but were you planning on bringing up the whole baby/lesbian thing? 我想那能帮我挡些子弹 Because I think it might take some of the heat off me. 瑞秋打算怎么过生活？我们在俱乐部遇到她爸妈 What that Rachel did to her life. We ran into her parents at the club. 他们似乎很难过 They were not playing very well. 我不想告诉你们 他们花了多少钱办婚礼 I'm not gonna tell you what they spent on that wedding... 但四万块是一大笔钱 ...but $40,000 is a lot of money. 至少她有机会在婚礼上甩了男人 Well, at least she had the chance to leave a man at the altar. - 那是什么意思？ - 没事 - What's that supposed to mean? - Nothing. - 那只是一种说法 - 不 不是的 - It's an expression. - No, it's not. 别听你妈妈的 Don't listen to your mother. 你很独立 你一直都是如此 You're independent and you always have been. 即使你小时候胖嘟嘟的 Even when you were a kid, and you were chubby... 没有朋友 你还是过得很好 ...and you had no friends, you were just fine. 你一个人在房里看书玩拼图 You'd read alone in your room. And your puzzles... 听着 像罗斯这样的人 必须追求成功 Look, there are people, like Ross, who need to shoot for the stars. 他到博物馆工作 准备出版论文 With his museum and his papers getting published. 其他人则是安于现状 Other people are satisfied with staying where they are. 我要说的是这些人永远不会得癌症 I'm telling you, these are the people who never get cancer. 我看到报导说这些女人想那么做 谢天谢地 And I read about these women trying to have it all, and I thank God... 我们的小摩妮卡没有那样的问题 ...our little Harmonica doesn't seem to have that problem. 罗斯 你还好吗？ So, Ross, what's going on with you? 有任何故事吗？没有消息或趣事要跟父母分享？ Any stories? No news, no little anecdotes to share with the folks? 好吧 Okay, okay. 听着 我知道你们一直很好奇 Ahem. Look, I, uh... I realize you guys have been wondering... 我跟卡萝到底是怎么了？ ...what exactly happened between Carol and me. 情况是这样的 And so, well, here's the deal. 卡萝是女同志 Carol's a lesbian. 她跟一个叫苏珊的女人住在一起 She's living with a woman named Susan. 她怀了我的孩子 She's pregnant with my child. 她跟苏珊要一起抚养孩子 And she and Susan are going to raise the baby. 你早就知道了？ And you knew about this? 你们的爸妈真的有那么难过？ Your folks are really that bad, huh? 他们可是专家 Well, you know, these people are pros. 他们知道自己在做什么 愿意花时间 They know what they're doing. They take their time. 不做完誓不甘休 They get the job done. 天啊 我知道俗话说 人是无法换父母的 Boy, I know they say that you can't change your parents. 天啊 如果可以的话 我想跟你换父母 Boy, if you could, I'd want yours. 我得去尿尿 Must pee. 这比你们是双胞胎还糟糕 You know, it's even worse when you're twins. - 你是双胞胎？ - 对 我们不说话 - You're a twin? - Oh, yeah. We don't speak. 她是位高权重的霸道女强人 She's like this high-powered, driven, career-type. - 她做什么样的工作？ - 她是服务生 - What does she do? - She's a waitress. 好了 各位 我必须打扫 All right. You guys, I kind of gotta clean up now. 钱德 你是独生子 你不必忍受这一切 Chandler, you're an only child, right? You don't have any of this. 不 但我有个幻想的朋友 Well, no, although I did have an imaginary friend... 我爸妈比较喜欢他 ...who my parents actually preferred. 请关灯 Hit the lights, please. 我在厕所待了多久？ How long was I in there? 我只是在打扫 I'm just cleaning up. 你需要帮忙吗？ Oh, do you, uh...? Do you need any help? 当然 谢谢 Um, okay, sure. Thanks. 总之 Anyway... 你很紧张明天要跟贝瑞见面？ So you nervous about Barry tomorrow? - 有一点 - 唔 - Oh, a little. - Mm-hm. - 非常紧张 - 嗯 - A lot. - Mm-hm. 你有任何建议吗？ So got any advice? 毕竟你有被甩的经验 You know, as someone who's recently been dumped. 你该避免用 "甩" 这个字 Well, you may want to steer clear of the word "dumped." 他很可能心都碎了 你懂吗？ Chances are he's going to be this broken shell of a man. You know? 你不能看起来太漂亮 我知道那很难 So you should try not to look too terrific. I know it'll be hard. 或是由我过去把戒指还给贝瑞 Or, you know, hey, I'll go down there, and I'll give Barry back his ring. 你陪卡萝跟苏珊去看妇产科 And you can go with Carol and Susan to the OB-GYN. 明天你得去陪卡萝 You've got Carol tomorrow. 何时世界变得这么复杂？ When did it get so complicated? 你问倒我了 Got me. - 还记得我们念高中的时候吗？ - 对 - Remember when we were in high school? - Yeah. 你不觉得你会遇上某人 I mean, didn't you think you' were gonna meet someone... 坠入爱河 就这样过了一生吗？ ...fall in love, and that'd be it? - 罗斯 - 没错 - Ross? - Yes, yes. 天啊 我没想到我会落到这步田地 Oh. Man. I never thought I'd be here. 我也是 Me neither. 抱歉我迟到了 我有工作在忙 Hi. Sorry I'm late. I got stuck at work. 关于这个大恐龙 总之 There was this big dinosaur thing. Anyway... 嗨 Hi. - 罗斯 你记得苏珊 - 我怎么会忘记呢？ - Ross, you remember Susan. - How could I forget? 罗斯 Ross. 苏珊 握手力道蛮不错的 Hello, Susan. Good shake, good shake. 我们在等 So, uh, we're just waiting for? - 欧伯曼医生 - 欧伯曼医生 他是 - Dr. Oberman. - Dr. Oberman. Okay, and is he...? - 是她才对 - 当然 是她才对 - She. - Of course, "she." 她知道我们的特殊状况吗？ She, uh, familiar with our special situation? 对 她非常支持我们 Yes, and she's very supportive. 太棒了 那是件好事 Great. Okay, that's great. Heh. 不 我 No, I'm... 谢谢 Thanks. 呱 Quack, quack... 呱 ...quack, quack, quack. 罗斯 Ross? 那是用来打开我的子宫颈 That opens my cervix. - 贝瑞 - 请进 - Barry? - Come on in. 你确定吗？ Are you sure? 没关系 罗比得在这里待上几小时 It's fine, it's fine. Robbie's gonna be here for hours. 唔？ Huh? 你还好吧？ So how are you doing? 我 I'm... 我很好 I'm okay. 你气色很不错 You look great. 没错 Yeah, well... 巴巴尔医生 杰森•葛林斯潘笑个不停 Dr. Farber, Jason Greenspan's gagging. 马上到 我立刻回来 Be right there. I'll be back in a second. 我甩了他 I dumped him. 好吧 Okay. 噢 Oh! - 罗斯 - 这应该怎么做才好？ - Ross. - So, um...? So how's this going to work... 我是说我们 ...ahem, you know, with us? 譬如说得做出重要决定时 You know, when, like, important decisions have to be made? 举个例子来听听 Give me a "for instance." 我不知道 好吧 Well, I don't know. Okay, okay. - 宝宝的名字呢？ - 马龙 - How about with the baby's name? - Marlon... - 马龙 - 如果是儿子 女子就叫米妮 - Marlon. - ...if it's a boy. Minnie, if it's a girl. 跟米妮老鼠一样？ As in "Mouse"? 跟我奶奶一样 As in my grandmother. 但提到米妮 大家会想到米妮老鼠 Still, you say "Minnie," you hear "Mouse." 何不叫 How about, um... 何不叫茱莉亚呢？ How about "Julia"? 茱莉亚？ Julia. 我们同意叫米妮了 We agreed on Minnie. 那真的很有趣 我们同意要共度一生 It's funny, um, we agreed we'd spend our lives together. 事情变了 我们可以用拳头来决定 Things change. Roll with the punches. 我相信茱莉亚是个好名字 I believe Julia's on the table. 对不起 Oh. Sorry about that. 你还好吧？ So, what have you been up to? 还算可以 Oh. Not much. - 我找到工作了 - 那真的很棒 - I got a job. - Hey, that's great. 为什么你皮肤变得这么黑？ Why are you so tan? 我 Oh, I, uh... 我去了阿鲁巴 I went to Aruba. 不 你一个人去度我们的蜜月？ Oh, no. You went on our honeymoon alone? 不 No. 听着 我跟... See, uh, I went with... - 这或许会有点痛 - 我吗？ - Now, this may hurt. - Me? 不 No. 我跟敏蒂去的 I went with Mindy. 敏蒂？ Mindy? 我的伴娘敏蒂？ My maid of honor, Mindy? 对 我们在交往 Yeah, well, we're kind of a thing now. 我... Well, I'm... 你做了植发 You got plugs. 小心 它们还没有完全固定 Careful, careful. They haven't quite taken yet. 你戴了隐形眼镜 And you got lenses. 你讨厌把手指戳到眼睛里 But you hate sticking your finger in your eye. 为了她 没关系的 Not for her. 噢 Oh. 听着 我真的想谢谢你 Listen, I really wanted to thank you. 好的 Okay. 一个月前我想伤害你 About a month ago, I wanted to hurt you... 你是我最想伤害的人 ...more than I've ever wanted to hurt anyone in my life. 我是牙齿矫正师 And I'm an orthodontist. 哇 Wow. 你说得对 我以为我们很快乐 You know, you were right. I mean, I thought we were happy. 我们不快乐 We weren't happy. 可是跟敏蒂在一起 But with Mindy... 现在我很快乐 ...now I'm happy. - 吐吧 - 什么？ - Spit. - What? 是我 Me. 总之 Anyway, um... 我想这该还给你 I guess, uh... I guess this belongs to you. 谢谢你把它送给我 And thank you for giving it to me. 谢谢你把它还给我 Well, thank you for giving it back. 哈罗 Hello. 拜托 海伦有什么不好？ Oh, please. What's wrong with Helen? 海伦•盖勒？ Helen Geller? - 我不觉得好 - 哈罗 宝宝不叫海伦•盖勒 - I don't think so. - Hello, it's not gonna be Helen Geller. 谢谢 Thank you. 不 我是说宝宝不姓盖勒 No. I mean, it's not Geller. 什么？宝宝叫海伦•威利克？ What, it's gonna be Helen Willick? 不 事实上她叫海伦•威利克•邦奇 No, actually, um, we talked about Helen Willick Bunch. 等一下 为什么这跟她有关？ Well, wait a minute. Why is she in the title? 因为这也是我的宝宝 Because it's my baby too. 那太好笑了 真的吗？我不记得你会制造精子 That's funny. Really? I don't remember you making any sperm. 我们都知道那是个多大的挑战 And we all know what a challenge that is. - 看吧 - 好了 你们两个 别说了 - Uh-huh. See? - All right, you two, stop it. 不 她有功劳 我也是 No, no. She gets a credit. Hey, I'm in there too. 说真的 宝宝不能叫 海伦•威利克•邦奇•盖勒 Honestly. You're not actually suggesting Helen Willick Bunch Geller. 我想那跟虐童差不多 I think that borders on child abuse. 当然不是 我想宝宝叫盖勒•威利克•邦奇 Of course not. I'm suggesting Geller Willick Bunch. 不 你知道他在做什么吗？ Oh, no. No, no, no. You see what he's doing? 他知道没有人会那样叫她 He knows no one is gonna say all those names. 最后他们会叫她盖勒 那样子他就达到目的了 He knows they'll wind up calling her Geller. Then he gets his way. 我的目的？你觉得这是我的目的？ My way? You think this is my way? 相信我 目前我想象过的生活 Believe me, of all the ways I ever imagined this moment in my life being... 绝对不包括这一点 你知道吗？这真的太难了 ...this is not my way. You know what? This is too hard. 还好吗？有恶心的感觉吗？ Knock, knock. How are we today? Any nausea? - 有一点 - 只有一点 - A little. - Just a little. 我是指准妈妈的感觉 不过谢谢你们跟我分享 Well, I was just wondering about the mother-to-be, but, uh, thanks for sharing. 躺好 Uh, lie back. 你知道吗？我要走了 You know what? I'm gonna go. 我想我无法介入这种家务事 Um, I don't think I can be involved in this particular family thing. 天啊 Oh, my God. 看看那个 Look at that. 我知道 I know. 那真的很神奇吧？ Well, isn't that amazing? 我们到底要看什么？ What are we supposed to be seeing here? 我不知道 我想那跟攻击企业号有关 I don't know, but I think it's about to attack the Enterprise. 如果你们的头往左斜 眼睛放轻松 You know, if you tilt your head to the left and relax your eyes... 它看起来像颗土豆 ...it kind of looks like an old potato. 别那么做 好吗？ Then don't do that, all right? 摩妮卡 Monica? 你觉得呢？ What do you think? 唔 Mm-hm. 你哭了吗？ Are you welling up? - 不 - 才怪 - No. - You are. - 才怪 你哭了 - 不 我才没有 - You are. You're welling up. - No, I'm not. - 你要当姑姑了 - 闭嘴 - You're gonna be an aunt. - Oh, shut up. 敏蒂 Hi, Mindy. 我是瑞秋 Hi, it's Rachel. 对 我很好 今天我跟贝端见面 Yeah, I'm fine. I saw Barry today. 对 他跟我说了 Oh, yeah, yeah, he told me. 不 没关系 真的 No, it's okay. Really, it's okay. 我希望你们两个快乐 真的 I hope you two are very happy. I really do. 小敏 如果一切顺利 And, Min, you know, if everything works out... 你们会结婚生孩子 ...and you guys end up getting married and having kids and everything... 我希望他们遗传了他的发线 跟你的鼻子 ...I just hope they have his old hairline and your old nose. 好吧 我知道那么做很低级 但现在我觉得痛快多了 Okay, I know it was a cheap shot, but I feel so much better now. # Friends.S01E03.1994.BluRay.1080p.x265.10bit.MNHD-FRDS.txt - 大家好 - 菲比 - Hi, guys. - Hey, Phoebe. 情况如何？ Hey, oh, how did it go? 不是太好 Um, not so good. 他送我到地铁站 并且说 "我们该再这么做" He walked me to the subway and said, "We should do this again." - 哎呦 - 什么？他说 "我们该再这么做" - Ouch. - What? He said, "We should do it again." 那是件好事吧 That's good, right? 不 简单地翻译 "我们该再这么做" 是指 Uh, no. Loosely translated, "We should do this again," means: "你再也看不到我的裸体" "You will never see me naked." 从什么时候开始？ Since when? 一直都是这样 那是种约会语言 Since always. It's, like, dating language. "那与你无关" 意思是 "全都是你的错" You know, like, "It's not you," means, "It is you." "你是个好人" 意思是 "You're such a nice guy," means: "我要跟穿着皮衣的酒鬼约会" "I'm gonna be dating leather-wearing alcoholics... "跟他们抱怨你的事" ...and complaining about them to you." "我想我们该跟别人交往看看" 意思是指 Or, you know, um, "I think we should see other people," means: "我已经那么做了" "Ha, ha, I already am." 大家都知道这些事？ And everybody knows this? 对 降低冲击力 Oh, yeah. Cushions the blow. 像是你小的时候 爸妈将你的狗安乐死 Like when you're a kid and your parents put your dog to sleep... 跟你说他逃跑到农场去了 ...and they tell you it went off to live on some farm. 那真的很好笑 不 因为我们的爸妈真的… That's funny. No, because, uh, our parents actually did... 把我们的狗送到农场去 ...uh, send our dog off to live on a farm. 罗斯 Uh, Ross? 康乃狄克州的麦纳农场？ Ha, ha. Hello. The Milner's farm in Connecticut? 麦纳夫妇有座超棒的农场 The Milners, they had this unbelievable farm. 他们养了马跟兔子 他可以追着他们玩 They had horses and rabbits that he could chase. 那是… And it was... 天啊 奇奇 Oh, my God. Chi-Chi. "知道自己快死掉时 那是什么样的感觉？" "So how does it feel knowing you're about to die?" 典狱长 五分钟后我将不再痛苦 Warden, in five minutes my pain will be over. 但你得一辈子受到良心谴责 知道自己送一个诚实的人去死 But you'll have to live with the knowledge that you sent an honest man to die. - 那真的很不错 - 是吗？ - Hey, that was really good. - Yeah? - 对 - 谢了 继续吧 - Yeah. - Thanks. Let's keep going. 好吧 "你要我怎么做？迪蒙" Okay. "So, what do you want from me, Dimon? Huh?" 我只想回我的牢房 因为在我的牢房里 我能抽烟 I just wanna go back to my cell, because in my cell, I can smoke. "你就抽吧" "Smoke away." 嘿 Heh. 我想这是迪蒙独自在牢房抽烟的原因 I think this is probably why Dimon smokes in his cell alone. - 什么？ - 手放轻松 - What? - Relax your hand. 手腕下垂 Let your wrist go. - 别垂得那么低 - 噢 - Not so much. - Whoa. 嘿 Hey. 好吧 试着抽一口 All right. Now try taking a puff. 对 Right. - 好吧 不 快给我 - 不 我才不要给你烟 - Okay, no, give it to me. - No, no, no. I'm not giving you a cigarette. 没关系的 听着 你要不要这个角色？来吧 No, it's fine. It's fine. Look, do you want to get this part or not? Here. 好吧 别当这是香烟 All right. Now, don't think of it as a cigarette. 当它是从你手里不见的东西 Think of it as the thing that has been missing from your hand. 拿着它 你觉得安心 When you're holding it, you feel right. - 你觉得圆满 - 你想念它吗？ - You feel complete. - You miss it? 不 不是很想 No, not so much. 好吧 现在抽一口 All right. Now we smoke. 我的天啊 Oh, my God. 不… No, no, no. 他们说那个的长度 跟男人拇指尖 They say it's the same as the distance from the tip of a guy's thumb... 到食指尖的距离一样 ...to the tip of his index finger. 那太夸张了 That's ridiculous. 我可以用另一只手的拇指吗？ Can I use either thumb? 好吧 别告诉我 All right. Don't tell me, don't tell me. 乔伊是无咖啡因的卡布奇诺 Decaf cappuccino for Joey. 黑咖啡 Coffee, black. 拿铁 Latte. 冰茶 And an iced tea. - 我真的很厉害 - 太好了 非常不错 - I'm getting pretty good at this. - Excellent. That's very good. 我太神了 Good for me. - 你还好吧 菲比？ - 对 不 那根本不值得… - You okay, Phoebe? - Yeah, no, it's not even worth... 是我的银行 It's my bank. 他们对你做了什么？ What did they do to you? 没事 只不过… 好的 It's nothing, it's just... Okay. 我看邮件时打开他们的月报表 I'm going through my mail, and I open up their monthly "statement." 别激动 Easy. 我的帐户多了五百块 And there's 500 extra dollars in my account. 撒旦的手下又发威了 Oh, Satan's minions at work again. 对 我得去银行跟他们谈 Yes, because now I have to go down there and deal with them... - 你干嘛要说呢？留下那笔钱 - 那不是我的钱 - What are you talking about? Keep it. - It's not mine. 那不是我赚来的 留下来那笔钱就等于我偷钱 I didn't earn it. If I kept it, it would be like stealing. 对 把它花掉 可以享受血拼乐趣 Yeah, but if you spent it, it would be like shopping. 好的 Okay. Okay. 假设我买了一双很棒的鞋子 Let's say I bought a really great pair of shoes. 你们知道我每跨出一步 会听到什么吗？ Do you know what I'd hear with every step I took? "不是我的钱" "Not mine. Not mine. Not mine." 即使我开心地飞舞 And even if I was happy, okay, and skipping... 我会听到 "不是我的钱" ...I'd hear, "Not mine. Not mine." 我们同意你的说法 我们了解 We're with you. We got it. 好吧 我无法享受乐趣 那是一大道德考验 Okay, I'd never be able to enjoy it. It'd be like this giant karmic debt. 钱德 你在做什么？ Chandler, what are you doing? Hey. 你在做什么？ What are you doing? 超恶心的 Oh, gross. - 这是怎么意回事？ - 我在抽烟 - What is this? - I'm smoking. I'm smoking. I'm smoking. 我不相信 三年来你表现很好 I can't believe you. You've been so good for three years. 这是我的奖励 And this is my reward. 等一下 想想上次戒烟时你吃的苦 Hold on a second. Just think about what you went through the last time you quit. 好吧 所以这次我不戒烟 Okay, so this time I won't quit. - 把烟熄了 - 好吧 我熄了就是 - Put it out. - All right. I'm putting it out. 不 Oh, no. 现在我没办法喝咖啡了 I can't drink this now. 好吧 我要去换衣服 我有约会 All right, I'm gonna go change. I've got a date. 又是亚伦？情况如何？ Is this Alan again? How's it going? 非常不错 你们知道吗 我们相处既愉快又开心 It's going pretty good, you know? It's nice and we're having fun. - 我们何时能见到这家伙？ - 对 - So when do we get to meet the guy? - Yeah. 让我想一想 今天是星期一 Let's see, today's Monday... - 永远不可能 - 少来了 - Never. - Come on. - 不 在史提夫后是不可能了 - 你在胡说什么？ - No, not after what happened with Steve. - What are you talking about? 我们爱史提夫 史提夫超性感 We love Steve. Steve was sexy. 抱歉 Sorry. 我不知道我对他有什么感觉 给我机会弄清楚 Look, I don't know how I feel about him yet. Give me a chance to figure it out. 然后我们能跟他见面？ Well, then can we meet him? 不行 No. 抱歉 Sorry. 为什么我要让他们跟他见面？ Why should I let them meet him? 我带男人回家 五分钟内他们围着他问个不停 I bring a guy home and within five minutes they're all over him. 他们像是土狼 专对弱小猎物下手 I mean, they're like coyotes picking off the weak members of the herd. 听着 对一个什么倒霉事都遇过的人来说 Listen, as someone who's seen more than her share of bad beef... 我想那不算是太糟糕 ...I'll tell you, that is not such a terrible thing. 他们是你的朋友 他们关心你 Come on, they're your friends. They're looking out after you. 我知道 我希望我能带个他们喜欢的男人回家 I know, I know. I wish that once I'd bring a guy home they actually liked. 你知道 如果他们永远不跟这个男的见面 Well, you do realize that the odds of that happening are a little slimmer... 机率会更小的 ...if they never get to meet the guy. 算了吧 罗斯 Let it go, Ross. 是吗？你根本不认识奇奇 Yeah? Well, you didn't know Chi-Chi. 你们都保证吗？ Do you all promise? - 对 我们保证 我们会很乖的 - 我们保证 - Yeah, we promise. We'll be good. - We promise. 钱德 你保证会很乖吗？ Chandler, do you promise to be good? 你可以进来 但你的烟得放在外面 You can come in, but your filter tip little buddy has to stay outside. 菲比 Hey, Pheebs. "亲爱的布非小姐 谢谢你通知我们犯了错" "Dear Ms. Buffay: Thank you for calling attention to our error. "我们将五百块汇到你的帐户 抱歉造成你的不便" We have credited your account $500. We're sorry for the inconvenience... "希望你收下这个足球电话" ...and hope you'll accept this football phone... 做为我们的免费礼物" 你们能相信吗？ ...as our free gift." Do you believe this? 现在我有一千块跟这个足球电话 Now I have $1000 and a football phone. 你在哪家银行开的户？ What bank is this? 好吧 他来了 Okay, it's him. - 哪位？ - 亚伦 - Who is it? - Alan. 钱德 他来了 Chandler. He's here. 好了 拜托你们乖一点 Okay, please be good. Please? 记得你们有多么喜欢我 I mean, remember how much you like me. 亚伦 他们是我的朋友 各位 他是亚伦 Hi. Alan, this is everybody. Everybody, this is Alan. - 嗨 - 嘿 - Hi. - Hey. 我常听到你们的事 I've heard so much about all you guys. 谢谢 明天我再打电话给你 Thanks, I'll call you tomorrow. 好吧 Okay. 好吧 开始批评亚伦 Okay, let's let the Alan-bashing begin. 谁要开第一枪？ Who's gonna take the first shot? 嗯？ Hmm? 来吧 Come on. 我先来 I'll go. 从他一直挑… Let's start with the way he kept picking at... 对不起 我办不到 You know, I'm sorry, I can't do this. 我办不到 我们爱他 Can't do it. We loved him. - 我们爱他 - 等一下 - We loved him. - Wait a minute. 我们在谈我的约会对象吗？ We're talking about someone that I'm going out with? - 对 - 你们注意到了吗？ - Yes. - And did you notice? 对 Yeah. 你们知道哪一点最棒吧？他的笑容有点坏坏的 Know what was great? The way his smile was kind of crooked. 对 像鞋子里的男人 Yes, yes. Like the man in the shoe. 什么鞋子？ What shoe? 童谣里的歌词 From the nursery rhyme. "有个坏男人 带着坏坏的笑容" "There was a crooked man who had a crooked smile... "他在鞋子里住了一阵子" ...who lived in a shoe for a while..." 我想… So I think Alan... 把亚伦作为标竿 ...will become the yardstick... 用来评估你未来所有的男朋友 ...against which all future boyfriends will be measured. 什么未来的男朋友？ What future boyfriends? 不 我想就是他了 No, no. I think this could be, you know, "it." - 真的吗？ - 对 - Really? - Oh, yeah. 我会嫁给他 因为他的表情 跟大卫•赫索霍夫一样 I'd marry him just for his David Hasselhoff impression alone. 你们知道我在派对上会怎么做吧？ You know I'm gonna be doing that at parties, right? - 你们知道我最喜欢他哪一点吗？ - 什么？ - You know what I like most about him? - What? 他让我喜欢我自己 The way he makes me feel about myself. 对 Yeah. 嗨 Hi. 比赛还好吧？ How was the game? 那个嘛… Well... - 我们赢了 - 我们赢了 谢谢 太棒了 - We won! - We won! Thank you! Yeah. 太棒了 我有个问题 怎么可能呢？ Fantastic. I have one question: How is that possible? - 亚伦 - 他太不可思议了 - Alan. - He was unbelievable. 他跟兔宝宝卡通里 每个位置都是兔宝宝一样 He was like that Bugs Bunny cartoon where Bugs is playing all the positions. 但他不是兔宝宝 一垒 亚伦 二垒 亚伦 But instead of Bugs, it was first base, Alan. Second base, Alan... 他让我们成为真正的球队 I mean, it was like he made us into a team. 对 我们真的让那些东正教犹太人珠宝商 Yep. We sure showed those Hasidic jewelers... - 知道我们多会打垒球 - 太棒了 - ...a thing or two about softball. - Nice. 我能问你们一个问题吗？ Can I ask you guys a question? 你们会不会觉得亚伦有时候… Do you ever think that Alan is maybe sometimes... - 什么？ - 我不知道 有点太亚伦了 - What? - I don't know. A little too Alan? 不 那是不可能的 他不可能会太亚伦 Oh, no. That's not possible. You can never be too Alan. 对 我们爱的是亚伦的内在 Yeah, it's his innate Alan-ness that we adore. - 我就蛮想有一加仑的亚伦 - 噢 - I, personally, could have a gallon of Alan. - Oh! - 莉兹 - 怪女孩 - Hey, Lizzy. - Hey, Weird Girl. - 我帮你买了字母汤 - 你把元音挑出来了吗？ - I brought you alphabet soup. - Did you pick out the vowels? 对 但我留下Y 因为 "有时候非￥不可" Yes, but I left in the Y's. Because, you know, "Sometimes Y." 我还要给你一样东西 Um, I also have something else for you. 盐脆薄饼干 Saltines? 不 你要一千块跟足球电话吗？ No, but would you like $1000 and a football phone? 什么？ What? 天啊 Oh, my God. - 天啊 里面是真的钱 - 我知道 - Oh, my God. There's really money in here. - I know. 怪女孩 你在做什么？ Weird Girl, what are you doing? 我要你收下它 我不要这些钱 Oh, I want you to have it. I don't want it. 不 我得给你一样东西 No, no. I have to give you something. 没关系的 你不必… No, it's fine. You don't... 你要我的锡箔纸帽吗？ Do you want my tinfoil hat? 不 你需要它 没关系的 谢谢 No, because you need that. No, it's okay. Thanks. 拜托 让我帮你做些事 Please. Let me do something. 好吧 听我说 Okay, all right. I'll tell you what. 你请我喝杯汽水 我们就扯平了 好吗？ You buy me a soda and then we're even. Okay? - 好的 - 好的 - Okay. - Okay. 不用找了 Keep the change. 谢谢你 莉兹 Thanks, Lizzy. 你真的不想吃麻花饼？ Sure you don't want a pretzel? - 不 我不饿 谢谢 - 再见 - No, I'm fine. Thanks. - See you. 哈 Huh. 一根拇指？ A thumb? 呃 Ew. 我知道 我一打开就看到它 I know, I know. I opened it up and there it was... 漂浮在汽水里 就像是有人要搭便车一样 ...just floating in there, like this tiny little hitchhiker. 或许这是个比赛 你得收集五根手指 Maybe it's a contest, you know? Like "Collect all five." 有人想看一下吗？ Does, um, anyone wanna see? 不 谢谢 No, thanks. - 别那么做 少来了 - 别闹了 - Oh, hey, don't do that. Come on. - Cut that out. 那比拇指更糟糕 It's worse than the thumb. 这太不公平了 Hey, this is so unfair. - 为什么不公平？ - 我有个缺点 没什么大不了的 - Why is it unfair? - So I have a flaw. Big deal. 乔伊老是按压手指不讨厌吗？ Like Joey's constant knuckle-cracking isn't annoying? 罗斯说起来会咬文嚼字 And Ross, with his over-pronouncing every single word. 摩妮卡笑的时候会发出怪声 And Monica, with that snort when she laughs. 我是说那到底是怎么一回事？ I mean, what the hell is that thing? 我接受那些缺点 为什么你们不接受这样的我？ I accept all those flaws. Why can't you accept me for this? 按压手指会困扰大家 还是只有他？ Does the knuckle-cracking bother everybody, or just him? 那个嘛… Well... 没有它 我可以过得更好 ...I could live without it. 唔 Huh. 它有点讨厌或跟菲比咬头发一样？ Well, is it, like, a little annoying? Or is it like when Phoebe chews her hair? 不 别听他的 菲比 好吗？我觉得那很可爱 Now, don't listen to him, Pheebs, all right? I think it's endearing. 真的吗？ Oh, you do, do you? 发音标准不是件坏事 You know, there's nothing wrong with speaking correctly. 一点都没错 Indeed there isn't. 我该回去工作了 I should really get back to work. 不然有人会拿到他们点的东西 Yeah, otherwise someone might get what they actually ordered. 真相大白 有人说了实话 Oh. The hair comes out and the gloves come off. 你跟你朋友喜欢的男人约过会吗？ Did you ever go out with a guy your friends all really like? 不 No. 好吧 我朋友真的喜欢跟我约会的男人 Okay. Well, I'm going out with a guy my friends all really like. 你是指那些土狼吗？ We talking about the coyotes here? 好吧 有只牛逃过一劫 Heh. All right. A cow got through. 你能相信吗？ Can you believe it? 那像是… 你知道吗？ It's just, you know what? 我一点感觉都没有 I just don't feel the thing. 他们感觉很棒 我一点感觉都没有 I mean, they feel the thing. I don't feel the thing. 甜心 你应该一直… Honey, you should always... 都有感觉的 ...feel the thing. 听着 如果那是你对那家伙的感觉 摩妮卡 甩掉他 Listen, if that's how you feel about the guy, Monica, dump him. 我知道 那真的很难 I know, it's just gonna be really hard. 对 他是大人了 他会释怀的 Yeah, he's a big boy. He'll get over it. 不 他会没事的 我担心其他五个人 No, he'll be fine. It's the other five I'm worried about. 你尊重你的身体吗？ Do you have any respect for your body? 你知道你对自己做了什么吗？ Don't you realize what you're doing to yourself? 我有了你们跟癌症 Hey, you know, I've had it with you and your cancer... 肺气肿及心脏病 ...and your emphysema and your heart disease. 抽烟很酷 你们知道的 The bottom line is, smoking is cool, and you know it. 钱德 Ahem. Chandler? 是亚伦 他要跟你说话 It's Alan. He wants to speak to you. 真的吗？是吗？ Really? He does? 兄弟 有什么事吗？ Hey, buddy. What's up? 她跟你说了？ Oh, she told you about that, huh? 对 我偶尔会抽 对 我正在抽 Well, yeah. I have one now and then. Well, yeah, now. 没那么糟糕 Well, it's not that bad... 一点都没错 Well, that's true. 天啊 没有人那么跟我说过 Gee, you know, no one's ever put it like that before. 好吧 谢谢 Well, okay. Thanks. 天啊 他真的很厉害 God, he's good. 可惜他不是女人 If only he were a woman. 对 Yeah. 羊排 Oh, Lamb Chop. 那只袜子有多旧了？ How old is that sock? 如果我手里存着袜子三十年 它也会说话 If I had a sock on my hand for 30 years, it'd be talking too. 好吧 我想有人该换尼古丁贴月了 Okay, I think it's time to change somebody's nicotine patch. 嘿 Hey. 乔伊人呢？ Where's Joey? 乔伊吃掉我最后一块口香糖 我杀了他 Joey ate my last stick of gum, so I killed him. 你觉得那是不对的吗？ Do you think that was wrong? - 我想他在对面 - 谢谢 - I think he's across the hall. - Thanks. 好了 There you go. 现在我开心得要命 Ooh, I'm alive with pleasure now. 菲比 你要吃剩下的果酱馅饼吗？ Hey, Pheebs, you gonna have the rest of that Pop Tart? 谁要吃剩下的果酱馅饼？ Does anyone want the rest of this Pop Tart? 我想吃 Hey, I might. 抱歉 I'm sorry. 汽水公司的人 要为拇指的事赔我七千块 You know, those stupid soda people gave me $7000 for the thumb. - 天啊 - 七千块？ - Oh, my God. - Seven thousand dollars? 我到那里的路上踩到口香糖 And on my way over here, I stepped in gum. 这个世界到底是怎么了？ What is up with the universe? 发生了什么事？ What's going on? 没事 我只是想跟大家一起聚聚 Nothing. I just think it's nice when we're all here together. 如果大家有时间穿内裤会更棒 It's even nicer when everyone gets to wear their underwear. - 乔伊 - 噢 - Uh, Joey... - Oh. - 好了 - 别这样 - Okay. - Oh, come on. 拜托 各位 我们得谈一谈 Please, guys, we have to talk. 等一下 我有种似曾相识的感觉 Wait, wait. I'm getting a déjà vu. 不 我想太多了 No, I'm not. - 好吧 我们得谈一谈 - 这就对了 - All right, we have to talk. - There it is. 好吧 这跟亚伦有关 Okay, it's about Alan. 我该跟你们说一件事 There's something you should know. 天啊 要这么说并不容易 Oh, man, there's really no easy way to say this. Uh... 我决定跟亚伦分手 I've decided to break up with Alan. 你有了别人？ Is there somebody else? 不 那只是… No, no, no. It's just... 感觉会变 人是会变的 ...you know, things change. People change. 我们没变 We didn't change. 就这样？一切结束了？ So that's it? It's over? 就那样？ Just like that? 我好不容易打开心房 You know, you let your guard down. 真的开始关心别人 我只是… You know, you start to really care about someone, and I just... - 听着 我可以继续假装… - 好的 - Look, I could go on pretending... - Okay. 不 那对我不公平 No. No, that wouldn't be fair to me... 对亚伦或你们都不公平 ...it wouldn't be fair to Alan, or to you. 对 谁要公平呢？ Yeah, well, who wants fair? 我只希望一切回到从前 I mean, I just want things back, you know, the way they were. - 我很抱歉 - 她觉得抱歉 我好过多了 - I'm sorry. - Oh, she's sorry. I feel better. 我不敢相信 I just can't believe this. 快过节了 我要他跟我家人见面 I mean, with the holidays coming up. I wanted him to meet my family. 我会认识别人的 还会有别的亚伦 I'll meet someone else. There'll be other Alans. 对 Yeah, right. - 你们没事吧？ - 我们会没事的 - Are you guys gonna be okay? - Hey, hey. We'll be fine. 我们只需要一点时间 We're just gonna need a little time. 我了解 I understand. 哇 Wow. - 我真的很抱歉 - 对 我是说我也有点抱歉 - I'm really sorry. - Yeah. I mean, I'm sorry too. 我得说我是松了一口气 But I gotta tell you, I'm a little relieved. - 松了一口气？ - 对 - Relieved? - Yeah, well... 跟你在一起 我很闹心 ...I mean, I had a great time with you. 我受不了你的朋友们 I just can't stand your friends. 记得我们到中央公园租船的事吗？ Remember when we went to Central Park and rented boats? 那真的很好玩 That was fun. 对 他划起船来就像维京人 Yeah. He could row like a Viking. - 嗨 - 嗨 - Hi. - Hi. 结果怎么样？ So how'd it go? - 你们知道的 - 他有提到我们吗？ - You know. - Did he mention us? 他说他会想念你们的 He says he's really gonna miss you guys. 你真的很不好过吧？ You had a rough day, huh? - 你才不会懂 - 过来 - Oh, you have no idea. - Come here. - 够了 我要抽烟 - 不… - That's it. I'm getting cigarettes. - No, no, no. 我不在乎 I don't care. I don't care. 游戏结束 我得抽烟 Game's over. I'm weak. I've gotta smoke. I've gotta have the smoke. 只要你不再抽烟 我给你七千块 If you never smoke again, I'll give you $7000. 好吧 Yeah, all right. # Friends.S01E04.1994.BluRay.1080p.x265.10bit.MNHD-FRDS.txt 那真的很不错 Oh, that's good. - 好了 菲比 - 好的 - Okay. All right, Phoebe? - Okay, okay. 如果我能大权在握一天 我要世界和平 If I were omnipotent for a day, I would want, um, world peace... 不再有饥饿 保护雨林 ...no more hunger, good things for the rain forest. 咪咪变大一点 And bigger boobs. 你抢走我的愿望了 Well, see, you took mine, so... 钱德 你呢？ Chandler, what about you? 如果我能大权在握一天 我会让自己永远大权在握 If I were omnipotent for a day, I'd make myself omnipotent forever. 看吧 总是有这样的人 Heh. See, there's always one guy. "如果我能许一个愿 我的愿望是再许三个愿" "If I had a wish, I'd wish for three more wishes." - 乔伊 - 兄弟 - Hey, Joey. - Hey, buddy. 如果你能大权在握 你要做什么？ What would you do if you were omnipotent? 可能是自杀吧 Probably kill myself. 你说什么？ Excuse me? 如果小乔伊死了 我没有理由再活下去 Hey, if Little Joey's dead, then I got no reason to live, you know? 乔伊 大权在握 Joey, uh, omnipotent. 你是吗？ You are? 罗斯 我… Ross, I'm... 她是怎么办到的？ How does she do that? 我在公共场合睡不着 I cannot sleep in a public place. 你能看看她吗？ Would you look at her? - 她睡得好香 - 对 - She's so peaceful. - Yeah. 什么？嗨 What? What? Hi. 没事的 你只是又睡着了 It's okay, you know. You just nodded off again. - 哦 - 你是怎么了？ - Oh. - What's going on with you? - 昨晚我根本没睡 - 为什么？ - I got no sleep last night. - Why? 我奶奶交了新男友 My grandmother has this new boyfriend... 他们在床上摇来摇去的 ...and they're both kind of insecure in bed, so... 他们都聋了 And deaf. 他们不断跟对方保证他们非常快乐 So they're constantly having to reassure each other that they're having a good time. 你不知道他们有多吵 You have no idea how loud they are. - 今晚你可以过来跟我及瑞秋住 - 谢谢 - You can stay with Rachel and me tonight. - Thanks. 看吧 我说的对 这里离我们的公寓不到一百步 See, I told you. Less than 100 steps from our place to here. 你真的是太闲了 You got way too much free time, man. 寿星在那里 Hey, there's the birthday boy. 罗斯 看吧 曲棍球赛门票 Ross, check it out. Hockey tickets. 今晚游骑兵队跟企鹅队在花园广场比赛 我们一起去 Rangers-Penguins tonight at the Garden. We're taking you. - 生日快乐 - 我们爱你 - Happy birthday, pal. - We love you, man. 真有趣 我生日是七个月前 It's funny, my birthday was seven months ago. - 所以呢？ - 我猜你们多买了一张门票 - So? - So I'm guessing you had an extra ticket... 无法决定谁能带女伴去？ ...and couldn't decide which one of you got to bring a date? Huh? 对吧？悲观先生 Well, aren't we Mr. The-Glass-is-Half-Empty? 天啊 Oh, my God. Oh. 今天是十月二十日？ Is today the 20th? October 20th? - 我还希望你不会记得 - 噢 - I was hoping you wouldn't remember. - Oh. 二十日有什么问题？ What's wrong with the 20th? 离万圣节还有十一天？所有的好服装都被租走了？ Eleven days before Halloween? All the good costumes are gone? 今天是卡萝跟我 Today's the day Carol and I... 第一次发生 ...first consummated... 生理关系的日子 ...our physical relationship. 我们上床了 We had sex. 你知道吗？我不想看比赛 You know what? I better pass on the game. 我打算回家想我的前妻 跟她的同性恋爱人 I think I'm just gonna go home and think about my ex-wife and her lesbian lover. 管他的曲棍球 我们都那么做吧 The hell with hockey. Let's all do that. 来吧 罗斯 你 我跟乔伊去看曲棍球赛？ Come on, Ross. You, me, Joey, ice? 男生一起出去玩一晚？来吧 你觉得如何 大帅哥？ Guys' night out? Come on, what do you say, big guy? 哈？ Huh? Huh? Huh? - 你在做什么？ - 我不知道 - What are you doing? - I have no idea. 别这样 罗斯 Come on, Ross. 好吧 或许这能让我忘了那些事 All right, all right. Maybe it will take my mind off it. - 你们保证会帮我买根假手指？ - 没问题 - You promise to buy me a big foam finger? - You got it. - 好吧 - 快看 我的第一张薪水支票 - All right. - Look, look, look. My first paycheck. 看信封上是我的名字 你好 Look at the window. There's my name. Hi, me. 我记得我第一次领到薪水的日子 I remember the day I got my first paycheck. 矿坑发生倒塌意外 八人丧生 There was a cave-in in one of the mines, and eight people were killed. 你在矿坑工作？ Wow, you worked in a mine? 不 我在乳品店工作 怎么了？ No, I worked at a Dairy Queen. Why? 天啊 这真的很棒吧？这是我赚来的钱 God, isn't this exciting? I earned this. 我擦桌子跟加热牛奶赚来的钱 I wiped tables for it. I steamed milk for it. 这真是太… And it was totally... 不值得 ...not worth it. 谁是社会安全税？为什么他拿走我所有的钱？ Who's FICA? Why's he getting all my money? 这是怎么一回事？钱德 帮我看一下 I mean, what...? Chandler, look at that. 这还算不错 Oh, this is not that bad. 对 就第一份工作来说 你还算不错了 Oh, you're fine, yeah, for a first job. - 你可以靠它活下去 - 对 - You can totally, totally live on this. - Oh, yeah, yeah. 对了 今天服务很不错 By the way, great service today. - 哦 - 对 - Ooh. - Oh, yeah. - 太棒了 - 真的很不错 - Terrific. - It was excellent. 不可思议 牛奶跟咖啡？太棒了 Unbelievable. And all that milk and stuff? Great. - 曲棍球 - 曲棍球 - Hockey. - Hockey. Hockey. - 曲棍球 - 曲棍球… - Hockey. - Hockey. Hockey. Hockey. 瑞秋 Rachel? 天啊 Oh, my God! 我发誓在《野生王国》里 我看过鸟会这么做 I swear I've seen birds do this on Wild Kingdom. 你们来这里做什么？ What are you guys doing here? 我们来市区血拼 你妈说你在这里工作 Well, we were in the city shopping, and your mom said you work here... 那是真的 ...and it's true. 对 Yeah. 看看你穿围裙的样子 你看起来像是在演戏 Look at you in the apron. You look like you're in a play. 天啊 看看你 你的肚子好大 我不敢相信 God, look at you. You are so big. I can't believe it. 我知道 我是一人吃两人份 I know, I know. I'm a duplex. 你还好吗？ So, what's going on with you? 猜猜我爸找谁当他的事务所合伙人 Well, guess who my dad's making partner in his firm. 既然聊到大家的近况了 And while we're on the subject of news... 看吧 我有手肘 Look, look. I have elbows. 传给力奇 Passes it up to Leetch. 力奇发现梅瑟在边线 传球 Leetch spots Messier in the crease. Here's the pass. 噢… Oh. Oh. 我们要暂停一下 因为梅瑟停下来看女鞋 We'll take a time-out while Messier stops to look at some women's shoes. 卡萝穿着一双类似那样的靴子 就在那晚我们第一次… Carol was wearing boots just like those the night that we first... 你知道的 ...you know. 事实上她… In fact, she, uh... 她一直没脱鞋 She never took them off. Ha, ha. 因为我们… 抱歉 It's because we... Sorry. Sorry. 我不敢相信 I can't believe... - 什么？ - 桃子核 - What? - Peach pit. 什么事 小伙子？ Yes, bunny? 桃子核 Peach pit. - 那晚我们吃了… - 蜜桃？ - That night, we, uh, had... - Peaches? 是油桃才对 但基本上来说都一样 Actually, nectarines, but basically. - 算是蜜桃 - 然后我们… - Could've been a peach. - Then we, uh... 我们穿好衣服 我陪她走到... Then we got dressed and I walked her to... 公车站 ...the bus stop. 我没事 I'm fine. 那女人的屁股跟卡萝很像 Hey, that woman's got an ass like Carol's. 什么？我以为我们在找跟她有关的东西 What? I thought we were trying to find stuff. 来吧 各位 告诉我所有的八卦消息 Oh, come on, you guys. Tell me all the dirt. 最大的八卦消息 还是你在婚礼上甩了贝瑞 Well, the biggest news is still you dumping Barry at the altar. - 好吧 来谈一下现实问题 - 好的 - All right, let's talk reality for a second. - Okay. - 你何时要回家？ - 什么？ - When are you coming home? - What? 各位 我不回家了 Guys, I'm not. - 少来了 你是在跟我们说 - 我不回家了 - Heh. Come on. This is us. - I'm not. 这是我现在的生活 我找到这份工作 This is what I'm doing now. I've got this job. 当服务生？ Waitressing? 我不只是当服务生 Heh. I'm not just waitressing. 我是说我… I mean, I'm... 我… I, um... 我在特养公告栏写特餐消息 I write the specials on the specials board. 将枯掉的花从花瓶拿出来 And I take the dead flowers out of the vase. 有时候阿杜洛会让我将小巧克力块放在饼干上 Um, and sometimes Arturo lets me put the little chocolate blobbies on the cookies. 你妈妈没跟我们提小巧克力块的事 Well, your mom didn't tell us about the blobbies. 瑞秋 你跟你的朋友聊得还好吧？ Hey, Rach. How was it with your friends? 好啊 你要喝点鸡尾酒吗？ Okay, how would you like some Tiki Death Punch? 那是什么？ What's that? - 我加了兰姆酒跟… - 好吧 - Well, it's rum and... - Okay. 我们想既然菲比要留下来过夜 我们要办个睡衣派对 We thought since Phoebe's staying over we'd have a slumber party. 我们买了八卦杂志 还有饼干跟扭扭乐 We got some trashy magazines, we got cookie dough, we got Twister. 我带了手术游戏来 Ooh, ooh. And I brought Operation. 但镊子不见了 没办法动手术 But I lost the tweezers, so we can't operate. 但我们能帮病人做准备 But we can prep the guy. 瑞秋 是信用卡公司打来的 Rach, it's the Visa-card people. 天啊 问他们想干什么 Oh, God. Ask them what they want. 请问有何贵事吗？ Could you please tell me what this is in reference to? 好的 请稍等 Yes, hold on. 他们说你的帐户有异常活动 Um, they say there's been unusual activity on your account. - 但我好几个星期没刷卡了 - 那就是异常活动 - But I haven't used my card in weeks. - That is the unusual activity. 他们只想知道你是否没事 They just wanna see if you're okay. 他们想知道我是否没事？ They wanna know if I'm okay? 好吧 他们想知道我是否没事 让我想一想 Okay, they wanna know if I'm okay. Okay, let's see. 让我想一想 社会安全税拿走我所有的钱 Well, let's see. The FICA guys took all my money. 我认识的人不是结婚 怀孕就是升官了 Everyone I know is either getting married or getting pregnant or getting promoted... 我在端咖啡 ...and I'm getting coffee. 那不是我要喝的咖啡 And it's not even for me. 如果那听起来像是我很好 跟他们说我很好 好吗？ So if that sounds like I'm okay, okay, then you can tell them I'm okay. Okay? 瑞秋不在 Uh, Rachel has left the building. - 你能再打来吗？ - 好了 来吧 - Can you call back? - All right. Come on. 我们来玩扭扭乐 Let's play Twister. - 抱歉 - 对不起 - Sorry. - Sorry, sorry, sorry. 噢 Uh-oh. 什么？你那晚跟卡萝也看到冰了吗？ What? There was ice there that night with Carol? 塑胶椅？四千名愤怒的匹兹堡球迷？ Plastic seats? Four thousand angry Pittsburgh fans? 不 我是说看起来 我们没办法坐在一起 No, actually, I was just saying it looks like we're not sitting together. 既然你都提起了 那晚的确跟冰有关系 But now that you mention it, there was ice there that night. 那晚是初霜 It was the first frost. - 我们… - 坐吧 快点 - We were... - Sit. Just sit down. Sit. 你该觉得很棒 You should feel great. 你在独立过生活 You're doing this amazing independent thing. 摩妮卡 那有什么好的？ Monica, what is so amazing? 我放弃了一切 为什么？ I gave up like everything. And for what? 你跟杰克一样？ You are just like Jack. 楼下的杰克？ Jack from downstairs? 不 《杰克与魔豆》 No, Jack and the Beanstalk. - 另一个杰克 - 对 - Ah, the other Jack. - Yeah, right. 听着 他放弃一些事 得到魔豆 See, he gave up something, but then he got those magic beans. 他醒过来 看到一大棵植物 And then he woke up and there was this big plant... 在他家窗户外面 充满了无限的可能性 ...outside of his window, full of possibilities and stuff. 他住在小村子里 你住在村区 And he lived in a village, and you live in the Village. 好了 菲比 杰克放弃一头牛 Okay, but, Pheebs, Pheebs, Jack gave up a cow. 我放弃一位牙齿矫正师 I gave up an orthodontist. 好吧 我知道我不爱他 可是… Okay, I know I didn't love him, but... 看吧 杰克爱那头牛 Oh, see, Jack did love the cow. 那是我的计划 你知道吗？一切是那么清楚 But, see, it was a plan, you know? It was clear. 一切都已经安排好了 现在是… Everything was figured out, and now everything's just kind of like... - 一片混乱？ - 对 - Flupie? - Yeah. 不只是你 我们也不知道自己要做什么 You're not the only one. We don't know where we're going. 终有一天你会知道 情况会变得清楚 You gotta figure, at some point, it's gonna come together... 不再混乱 ...and it's just gonna be "unflupie." 对 才没有那个字 Yeah, like that's a word. 好吧 摩妮卡 如果情况不会好转呢？ Okay, but, Monica, what if it doesn't come together? 菲比 Pheebs? 因为你… 我不喜欢这个问题 Well, because you just... I don't like this question. 看吧 如果我们找不到魔豆呢？ Okay, see? See, you guys? What if we don't get magic beans? 我是说如果我们只有... I mean, what if all we've got are... 一般的豆子呢？ ...beans? 给他好看 Get him! Get him! Get him! 太棒了 你笑不出来了吧？兄弟 Get... Yes! You're not laughing now, are you, pal? 那能治好你的忧郁 几个没牙的家伙拿着球棍互打 That's all you need, a bunch of toothless guys hitting each other with sticks. 传球 Pass it. Pass it. 他有空档 射门 He's open, he's open. Shoot it, shoot it, shoot it! - 啊 噢 - 哇 - Whoa. Oh. - Whoa. - 看吧 我们上大银幕了 - 噢… - Hey, look, we're on that TV thing. - Ooh, ooh, ooh. - 我接到球了 - 我们接到球了 - I got it! - Hey, hey, we got it! Hey! 对不起 Excuse me. 上面说对糖果棒不满意 可以打这个电话号码 It says to call this number if you're not completely satisfied with this candy bar. 我不满意 Well, I'm not completely satisfied. 听着 这是紧急情况 Listen, it's kind of an emergency. 我猜你应该知道 不然我们应该是在危机室 I guess you'd know that, or we'd be in the predicament room. 等一下 填好表格 坐在那边等 Hold on. Fill these out. Sit over there. 听着 我不想麻烦你 Look, I don't wanna make any trouble, okay? 但我真的很痛 我毁容了 But I'm in a lot of pain here, all right? My face is dented. - 你必须排队等 - 你觉得我们得等多久？ - Well, you'll have to wait your turn. - Well, how long do you think it'll be? 随时都会轮到你们 Any minute now. 听着… Hey, listen... Ooh. 我醒过来 开始哭泣 I wake up and I start to cry 并不希望… Ain't no hope in... 对不起 我无意拉你们下水 Oh. I'm so sorry, you guys. I didn't mean to bring you down. 不 你说的对 No, you were right. 我没有计划 I don't have a plan. 披萨送来了 Pizza guy. - 谢天谢地 - 食物 - Thank God. - Food. - 菲比 - 什么？ - Phoebe? - What? - 你有计划？ - 我什么都没有 - Do you have a plan? - I don't even have a "plan". 一份蘑菇青椒洋葱披萨？ Hi. One mushroom, green pepper and onion? 不 那不是我们点的披萨 No, no, no. That's not what we ordered. 我们点了脱脂面皮 多加了起司的披萨 We ordered a fat-free crust with extra cheese. - 你们不是史帝芬洛普诺斯？ - 没错 - Wait, you're not G. Stephanopoulos? - No. - 天啊 我爸会杀了我 - 等一下 - Oh, man. My dad's gonna kill me. - Wait. 你说史帝芬洛普诺斯吗？ Did you say G. Stephanopoulos? 对 这是对街订的披萨 我一定把你们的披萨给了他 Yeah, this one goes across the street. I must have given him yours. 大笨蛋 Oh, bonehead. Bonehead. 等一下 他是矮小的地中海裔人 看起来很聪明？ Wait, was this a small Mediterranean guy with curiously intelligent good looks? 对 他就是长那个样子 Yeah, that sounds about right. - 他穿着亮蓝色衬衫？ - 打着显眼的领带？ - Was he wearing a stunning blue suit? - And a power tie? 不 他只围了一条浴巾 No, pretty much just a towel. - 天啊 - 哦… - Oh, God. - Oh. Oh. - 天啊 - 你们要我把这个拿回去吗？ - Oh, my God. - You want me to take this back? 什么？你疯了吗？这是乔治•史帝芬洛普诺斯的披萨 What? Are you nuts? We've got George Stephanopoulos' pizza. 来吧 Here. - 菲比 - 什么？ - Uh, Pheebs? - Yeah? 谁是乔治•史帝芬洛普诺斯？ Who's George Snuffleupagus? 他是大鸟的朋友 That's Big Bird's friend. 我看到披萨了 I see pizza. 我要看 让我看看 Oh, I wanna see. Let me see. Let me see. 我们在偷看谁？ Hello? Who are we spying on? 你知道白宫顾问吗？柯林顿的竞选总干事？ You know the White House adviser? Clinton's campaign guy? 那个发型帅气 笑容性感 屁股很可爱的帅哥？ The one with the great hair, sexy smile, really cute butt? 原来是他 那个小矮子 我爱他 Oh, him. The little guy. Oh, I love him. 等一下 我看到一个女人 Ooh. Oh, wait. Wait, I see a woman. 跟我说那是他妈妈 Tell me it's his mother. - 绝对不是他妈妈 - 不 - Definitely not his mother. - Oh, no. 等一下 她走到对面 Oh, wait, she's walking across the floor. 她还在走 She's walking, she's walking. 她要去拿披萨 那不是给你吃的 臭女人 She's going for the pizza. Hey, that's not for you, bitch! 麦斯医生请到中区456 Dr. Max to Center 456. 麦斯医生请到中区456 Dr. Max to Center 456. 对不起 我们等了一个小时 Excuse me. We've been here for over an hour... 没我朋友严重的人都进去了 ...and people less sick than my friend have gone in. 我是指脚趾有问题的家伙 他跟谁上床？ I mean, that guy with the toe thing? Who's he sleeping with? 少来了 朵拉 别生气 Oh, come on, Dora. Don't be mad. 我知道我们都说了一些 I know we both said some things... 无心之语 ...we didn't mean... 那不代表我们不爱彼此 ...but that doesn't mean we still don't love each other. 我觉得我失去她了 You know, I feel like I've lost her. - 还没开灯？ - 对 - Lights still out? - Yeah. 或许他们在睡觉 Well, maybe they're napping. 拜托 他们在上床 Heh. Please. They're having sex. 闭嘴 Shut up. 你们觉得乔治是什么样的人？ So, what do you think George is like? - 我想他应该很害羞 - 是吗？ - I think he's shy. - Oh, yeah? 对 我想你得鼓励他 Yeah. I think you have to draw him out. 当你那么做时 他会变成做好准备的野兽 And then when you do, he's a preppy animal. 少来了 Come on. 我记得月光从打开的窗户洒了进来 I remember the moonlight coming in through the open window... 她的脸闪闪发光 美极了 ...and her face had the most incredible glow. 对 月光 发光 神奇的感觉 Yes, the moon, the glow, the magical feeling. 这部分你说过了 You did this part. 拜托送点止痛药过来 Could I get some painkillers over here, please? 他说的对 够了 今天有什么大不了的？ He's right, enough already. What is the big deal about today? 你第一次跟她上床 那有什么大不了的？ So you slept with her for the first time. So what? 之后你跟她睡了七年 You slept with her for seven years after that. 情况比你说的复杂 It's just a little more complicated than that. 什么？怎么了？她离开你？她喜欢女人？ What? What is it? That she left you? That she likes women? 她为了喜欢女人的女人离开你？ That she left you for a woman that likes women? 你可以再大声一点 A little louder. 12楼陷入昏迷的病人 没听到你在说什么 There's a man on the 12th floor in a coma who didn't quite hear you. 那又怎么样？ Then what? 我跟卡萝的第一次是… My first time with Carol was... 是我的… Was my... 什么？ What? 那是我的第一… It was my first... 次 ...time. 跟卡萝？ With Carol? 喔 Oh. 你一辈子只跟一个女人在一起过？ So in your whole life, you've only been with one? 哦 Oh. 天啊 看曲棍球赛是个天大的错误 Oh, boy. Hockey was a big mistake. 今晚我们可以做的事太多了 There's a whole bunch of stuff we could've done tonight. 好吧 我想到一个 Okay. Okay, I got one. 你记得你超爱吃我做的素食香肠吗？ Do you remember that vegetarian pâté that I made that you loved so much? 嗯哼 Uh-huh. 除非鹅肉也算是蔬菜 Well, unless goose is a vegetable... - 噢… - 哈哈 - Oh! Oh! - Ha-ha-ha. 好吧 Okay, fine, fine. 现在我不会为了跟杰森•赫利上床感到内疚 Now I don't feel so bad about sleeping with Jason Hurley. - 什么？你跟杰森上床？ - 那时你们已经分手了 - What? You slept with Jason? - You had already broken up. - 分手多久？ - 只有几小时 - How long? - Just a couple hours. 那真的是太好了 Oh, that's nice. 好了 我想到一个 Okay, okay, okay, I got one. 管它的 Anyway. 汤米•罗勒森在你柜里留下的情人卡 事实上是我写的 The valentine Tommy Rollerson left in your locker was really from me. 你说什么？ Excuse me? 天啊 他才不会送你情人卡 Oh, hello? Like he was really gonna send you one. 那时她很胖 She was a big girl. 真的吗？ Really? 至少胖女孩不会在七年级时尿裤子 Well, at least big girls don't pee in their pants in seventh grade. 我在笑 你逗我笑 I was laughing. You made me laugh. 天啊 他出现了 Oh, my God. There he is. There he is. There he is. - 哪里？ - 就在我们看了一整晚的地方 - Where? - Right where we've been looking all night. - 他好可爱 - 乔治 宝贝 脱掉浴巾 - Oh, he's so cute. - Oh, George, baby, drop the towel. - 快点 脱掉浴巾 - 脱掉浴巾 - Come on, drop the towel. - Drop the towel. 拜托你脱掉浴巾 快点 Please drop the towel. Drop it. 哇哦 Wow. 天啊 你能相信他只跟一个女人上过床吗？ Man, can you believe he's only had sex with one woman? 我觉得那很棒 I think it's great. 既深情又浪漫 You know, it's sweet. It's romantic. 真的吗？ Really? 不 你在开玩笑吗？这家伙是怪胎 我是在批评他 No, are you kidding? The guy's a freak. I judge him. - 兄弟 - 兄弟 - Hey, man. - Hey, buddy. 啊哈？ Ah? Ah? 哦 Oh. 那还真是迷人 That's attractive. 我觉得你很适合演《沉默的羔羊》 Oh, I thought you were great in Silence of the Lambs. 少来了 承认吧 毕竟今晚你玩得很开心 Oh, come on, admit it, all things considered, you had fun tonight. 开心？有什么好开心的？ Fun? Where was the fun? 告诉我哪个部分可以开心了？ Tell me specifically, which part was the fun part? 我的橡皮圆盘在哪里？ Where's my puck? - 那孩子拿走了 - 那孩子 - Oh. The kid has it. - The kid? 对不起 那是我的橡皮圆盘 Ahem. Excuse me, uh, that's my puck. 那是我捡到的 谁捡到就是谁的 弄丢的人只能哭 I found it. Finders keepers, losers weepers. 你得出重手 兄弟 You gotta do it, man. 是吗？我是橡皮 你是胶水 不论你… Oh, yeah? Well, I'm rubber, you're glue. Whatever you... 我没办法那么做 I can't do it. - 听着 把圆盘还给我 - 不 - Listen, uh, give me back my puck. - No. - 你想怎么样？ - 不 - Yes, how about? - No. - 不 快点 把圆盘还给我 - 不 - No, come here. Just give me my puck. - No, no, no. 不 在我的急诊室不准打架 Hey, no roughhousing in my ER. 把圆盘还给我 Give me my puck! Unh. 那真的很好玩 Now, that was fun. 好吧 摩妮卡 Okay, Monica. 右脚 红色 Right foot, red. 我们可以玩大富翁 还是不要吧 Could've played Monopoly, but no. 谢谢 Thanks. 好吧 菲比 右手 蓝色 Okay, Pheebs. Right hand, blue. - 很不错 - 嗯？ - Good. - Hmm? 你好 Hello? - 瑞秋 信用卡公司打来的 - 好吧 你能代替我一下吗？ - Oh. Rachel, it's the Visa-card people. - Oh, okay. Will you take my place? 没问题 对 我是瑞秋 All right. Yes, this is Rachel. - 不 - 噢 - No. - Oh. 喂 Hello? 对 不 我知道 我最近没刷卡 Oh, yeah. No, I know. I haven't been using it much. 谢谢 我真的没事 Oh, well, thanks, but I'm okay, really. 绿色 To the green, to the green. - 不 - 绿色 - Oh, no. - To the green. 我找到魔豆了 I've got magic beans. 不 算了 No, no, never mind. 左边… To the left. To the left. 我很好 I'm fine. # Friends.S01E05.1994.BluRay.1080p.x265.10bit.MNHD-FRDS.txt 得了 那没什么大不了的 Would you let it go? It's not a big deal. 没什么？简直是太神奇了 Not a big deal? It's amazing. 只要把手伸进去弄一弄 You just reach in, there's one little maneuver, and bam! 一件胸罩 就直接从袖子里出来 A bra. Right out the sleeve. 据我所知 这种事 As far as I'm concerned... 男人根本就做不来 对吧？ ...there is nothing a guy can do that comes close. Right? 拜托 你们男人可以站着小便 Come on! You guys can pee standing up. 我们可以吗？好 我会试试 We can? Okay, I'm trying that. 知道我想到什么了吗？ You know what blows my mind? 女人随时可以看到胸部 Women can see breasts anytime they want. 只要往下一看 就在那里 You just look down, and there they are. 真不懂你们哪有办法专心做事 How you get any work done is beyond me. 我不懂男人怎能做出许多残忍的事情… OK. You know what I don't get is the way guys can do so many mean things... 却完全不在乎 ...and then not even care. 多重性高潮 Multiple orgasms! 周六夜 大日子 So Saturday night, the big night. 约会的日子 周六夜 周六夜 Date night! Saturday night. Saturday night! - 你没节目 对吧 - 一个也没有 - No plans, huh? - Not a one. 连跟珍妮丝分手的计划也没有？ Not even, say, breaking up with Janice? 对 对 闭嘴 Oh, right, right. Shut up. 钱德 没人喜欢跟别人分手 Chandler, nobody likes breaking up with someone. - 只是你非做不可 - 我知道 不过真的很难 - You just gotta do it. - I know. But it's just so hard. 你就跟她坐在一起 她浑然不觉 You're sitting with her. She has no idea what's happening. 终于你鼓起勇气 开始行动 You finally get up the courage to do it. 当你把纸条传给她时 气氛很僵 There's that awkward moment when you've handed her the note. 你干嘛非得跟她分手不可？ Why do you have to break up with her? 像个男人 不要再打电话就好了 Be a man. Just stop calling. 如果你需要的话 我可以跟你一起做 If you want, I'll do it with you. 谢谢 不过她会觉得我们在联合起来对付她 Thanks, but she'd feel like we were ganging up on her. 不 我是说是你甩珍妮丝 我甩东尼 I mean you break up with Janice. I'll break up with Tony. 你要跟东尼分手？ You're breaking up with Tony? 他很甜 不过已经不好玩了 I know. He's sweet, but it's just not fun anymore. 我不晓得原因在于我 或在于他的绝食 I don't know if it's me or his hunger strike. I don't know. 你们还要点些什么吗？ Does anybody want anything else? 对了 你们上周有一种很好吃的核桃巧克力蛋糕或派的一种… Yeah. Last week you had a wonderful nutty, chocolate-y, kind of cake-y pie thing that... 不用了 我不饿 Nothing. I'm fine. 怎么了？干嘛苦瓜脸？ What's the matter? Why so scrunchie? 我爸要给我一辆宾士敞篷 It's my father. He wants to give me a Mercedes convertible. 那家伙 真是令我火大 That guy, he burns me up. 对 是宾士 只要我搬回家去 Yeah, well, it's a Mercedes if I move back home. 真讨厌 他还叫我 "小姑娘" It was horrible! He called me "young lady." 我爸爸那样叫我时 我也很气 Ooh, I hate when my father calls me that. 他是否又念些 "你不可能办到" 之类的？ Did he give you that whole "You're not up to this" thing again? 我听到的是加长版 有一句不断重复的副歌是… Yeah, I got the extended disco version with three choruses of: "靠你自己是不可能成功的" "You'll never make it on your own." 嘿 乔伊 Hi, Joey. 哦 我的天 安琪拉 Oh, my God. Angela. 哇 被你甩掉 对她显然是好事 Wow. Being dumped by you obviously agrees with her. - 你要过去吗？ - 不 - Are you gonna go over there? - No. 好 不 Yeah. No. 可以 不过时候未到 我不想显得太饥渴 Okay, but not yet. I don't wanna seem too eager. 一下下 两下下… One Mississippi, two Mississippi... 三下下 这样似乎就很酷了 ...three Mississippi. That seems pretty cool. 嘿 安琪拉 Hey, Angela. 乔伊 Joey. 你看起来很性感 You look good. 那是因为我穿着一件特别强调胸部的衣服 Because I'm wearing a dress that accents my boobs. 可不是吗 You don't say. 那 瑞秋 你晚上有何计划？ So, Rachel, what are you doing tonight? 晚上可精彩了 我跟摩妮卡要去自助洗衣店 Big glamour night. Me and Monica at Launderama. 哦 Oh. 你想听一件诡异的巧合吗？ You wanna hear a freakish coincidence? 猜猜还有谁也会去？ Guess who's doing laundry there too? - 谁？ - 我 - Who? - Me. 这样还不够清楚吗？ Was that not clear? 何不…？ Hey, why don't...? 我何不加入你们两个人的行列？ Why don't I just join you both there? 你住的大楼 不就有一间洗衣室？ Don't you have a laundry room in your building? 对 Yes. 我那里有一间洗衣室 I do have a laundry room in my building. 不过 那里有老鼠出没 Um... But there's a rat problem. 他们显然对烘干机的芳香片 很有兴趣 Apparently, they're attracted to the dryer sheets. 他们进去的时候都还好好的 出来的时候就… They're going in fine, but they're coming out all... 蓬蓬的了 ...fluffy. 总之 七点左右好吗？ Anyway, 7-ish? 当然 Sure. 少来 我现在跟鲍柏在一起了 Forget it, Joey. I'm with Bob now. 鲍柏？鲍柏是谁？ Bob? Who the hell's Bob? 鲍柏很棒 Bob is great. 他很聪明 见过世面 而且有正当工作 He's smart, he's sophisticated, and he has a real job. 你一个月试镜三次 就说自己是演员 鲍柏则… You go on three auditions a month and you call yourself an actor. But Bob... 拜托 我们在一起时很快乐 Come on. We were great together. 不只是享乐的时候 比如说 谈话的时候也不错 And not just at the fun stuff, but, like, talking too. 抱歉 你说过 "我们就当朋友" Sorry, Joey. You said, "Let's just be friends." 你猜结果呢？ So guess what? - 怎样？ - 我们就只是朋友 - What? - We're just friends. 好吧 好吧 Fine. Fine. 今天我们四个人何不一块吃饭？就朋友嘛 So why don't the four of us go out and have dinner tonight? You know, as friends. 哪四个 "我们"？ What "four of us"? 你跟鲍柏 我跟我的女朋友… You and Bob, and me and my girlfriend, um... 摩妮卡 ...Monica. 摩妮卡 我告诉你 这家伙很适合你 Monica, I'm telling you, this guy is perfect for you. 甭想 自从你那个打嗝天王亲戚后 我就不再相信你了 Forget it! Not after your cousin who could belch the alphabet. 拜托 这家伙很棒 他叫鲍柏 他是安琪拉的… Come on, this guy's great. His name's Bob. He's Angela's... 兄弟 ...ahem, brother. 他很聪明又见过世面… He's smart, he's sophisticated... 而且他有正当工作 ...and he has a real job. 我一个月试镜三次 就说我是个演员 不过他是… Me, I go on three auditions a month and call myself an actor, but Bob is... - 老天爷啊 - 干嘛？ - Oh, God, help us. - What? 丑陋裸男在铺厨房地砖 Ugly Naked Guy is laying kitchen tile. 呃 Ew! 我是在请你帮忙 Look, I'm asking a favor here. 只要我帮她兄弟这个忙 I'm thinking if I do this for her brother... 安琪拉也许就会回到我身边 ...maybe Angela will come back to me. 你干嘛？你的女朋友加起来有几卡车 What's going on here? You go out with tons of girls. 我知道 不过… I know, but... 我犯了一个大错 我不该跟她分手的 Look, I made a huge mistake. I never should've broke up with her. 你帮帮我好吗？拜托？ Will you help me? Please? 好 再见 Okay. Bye. 摩妮卡不去了 只剩下我跟瑞秋 Monica's not coming. It's just gonna be me and Rachel. 等等 你这黄鼠狼 你仔细思考过了吗？ Hold on there, camper. You sure you've thought this through? 只是去洗衣服 不太需要用到大脑吧 It's laundry. The thinking through is pretty minimal. 只有你跟瑞秋？只有你们两个？ It's just you and Rachel? Just the two of you? 这是约会 你们要去约会了 This is a date. You're going on a date. 嗯哼 Nuh-uh. 嗯 Yeah-huh. 你觉得呢？ What are you saying? 我该再刮一下胡子 或拿瓶酒过去吗？ I should shave again? Pick up some wine? What? 嗯 你也许需要再考虑一下你的脏内裤 Well, you may wanna rethink the dirty underwear. 这将是她首次目睹你的内裤 你希望是脏脏的吗？ It's the first time she'll see your underwear. You want it to be dirty? 不希望 No. 还有柔衣精呢？ And the fabric softener? 好 我的柔衣精又碍到谁了？ Okay, okay. Now, what is wrong with my Snuggles? 怎样？这代表我是一个 感性 温暖的男人 What? It says I'm a sensitive, warm kind of guy. 知道吗？就像一只毛绒绒的小熊 You know, like a little fuzzy bear. 我在路上再买别的好了 I can pick something else up on the way. 谢谢 Thank you. 这个鲍柏长什么样子？他是高还是矮？ So what does this Bob guy look like? Is he tall, short? 对 Yep. 到底怎样？ Which? 什么怎样？ Which what? 你也没见过鲍柏 对吧？ You've never met Bob, have you? 没有 不过… No, but... 老天 这家伙搞不好长得很… For all we know, he could be horribly... 很迷人 我不再多说了 Horribly attractive. I'll be shutting up now. 他们人呢？人呢？ Where are they? Where are they? 太棒了 我们从来没有单独做过什么事 就我们两个 This is nice. We never do anything, just the two of us. 太好了 也许我们明天可以租辆车去撞一些小狗 That's great. Maybe tomorrow we can rent a car, run over some puppies. 我才不要 Ew. I don't wanna do that. - 开始了 - 祝分手顺利 - Here we go. - Have a good breakup. - 嘿 珍妮丝 - 我的天 我很高兴你打电话给我 - Hey, Janice. - My God, I am so glad you called me. 我今天真是衰到家了 I had the most supremely awful day. 那可不妙 That's not good. 请送意式浓缩咖啡跟拿铁过来 好吗？ Can I get an espresso and a latte over here, please? 我们拿到那些蔬菜照片的样本了 We got the proofs from that photo shoot with the vegetables. 拍得很糟 They sucked. 我干脆下午翘班去血拼 I blew off the rest of the afternoon. I went shopping. 我给你买… And I got you... 我在找 我在找 I'm looking. I'm looking. 我在找 I'm looking. - 我给你买… - 什么？ - I got you... - What? - 什么？ - 你给我买了什么了？ - What? - What did you get me there? 我给你… I got you... 买了这个 ...these. 《鹿兄鼠弟》的鹿兄袜 Bullwinkle socks. - 真好 - 我知道你已经有鼠弟的了 - That's so sweet. - I knew you had the Rockys. 你可以穿鹿兄配鹿兄 So you could wear Bullwinkle and Bullwinkle... 或鼠弟配鼠弟 或混着穿 ...or wear Rocky and Rocky, or you can mix and match. 麋鹿跟飞天鼠 Moose and squirrel. 随你搭配 Whatever you want. 我还要一杯意式浓缩咖啡 你还要拿铁吗？ I'm gonna get another espresso. More latte? 不用了 No. 不 我还在努力的喝这一杯 No, I'm still working on mine. 就这样？ That's it? 对 真的很困难 Yeah, it was really hard. 那个拥抱感觉很残酷 Yeah, the hug looked pretty brutal. 对 你又不在场 Okay, you weren't there. 别挡路 让开 让开 Coming through! Move! Move! 不好意思 我在用这部机器 Excuse me! I was kind of using that machine. 对 嗯 现在你好像没在用了 Yeah, well, now you're kind of not. 不过我已经有保留 我把篮子放在上面了 But I saved it. I put my basket on top. - 真对不起 这是你的篮子？ - 对 - I'm sorry. Is that your basket? - Yes. 很漂亮 可惜的是 我没看到洗衣粉 It's really pretty. Unfortunately, I don't see suds! 什么？ What? 没有洗衣粉就不能保留 好吗？ No suds, no save, okay? - 什么事？ - 嗨 - What's going on? - Hi. 没什么 那个讨厌的女人抢了我的洗衣机 Nothing. This horrible woman just took my machine. 你的篮子有放在上面吗？ Was your basket on top? - 有 不过没放洗衣粉 - 那又怎样？ - Yeah, but there were no suds. - So? 就是…没洗衣粉就不算保留 You know, no suds, no save. 没洗衣粉就不…不好意思 No suds, no... Excuse me. 等一下 Hold on a second! 这是我朋友的洗衣机 This is my friend's machine. 嘿… 她的东西没放在里面 Hey, hey, hey! Her stuff wasn't in it! 嘿… 你明知规矩不是那样的 Hey, hey, hey! That's not the rule, and you know it! 好 戏演完了 All right. Show's over. 没什么好看的了 Nothing to see here. 好 我们开始洗衣服了 Okay. Let's do laundry. 太厉害了 我连不是我点的汤都不敢退还 That was amazing! I can't even send back soup. 那是因为你是如此甜美 温柔… Well, that's because you're such a sweet, gentle... 你有…？ Do you, uh? 哦 嘿 你一定需要洗衣粉 Oh, hey. You must need detergent. - 那是什么？ - 超白牌洗衣粉 - What's that? - Überweiss. 是新的 德国货 超强力 It's new. It's German. It's extra tough! 瑞秋 你这些要分开吗？ Rach, do you...? Are you gonna separate those? 哦 天 Oh, God. Ugh. 我是洗衣白痴 对不对？ Am I being like a total laundry spaz? 我是否该把上衣跟裤子分别放入不同的洗衣机？ Am I supposed to use one machine for shirts and another for pants? 你从来没洗过衣服吗？ Have you...? Have you never done this before? 哦 我是没有啦 可是我认识一些洗过衣服的人 Well, not myself. But I know other people that have. 好 被你逮到了 我是个洗衣处女 Okay. You caught me. I'm a laundry virgin. 不要害怕 我会慢慢来 Don't worry. I'll use the gentle cycle. 好吧 Okay... 基本上 你得把所有白色的放在一部机器里 Basically, you wanna use one machine for all your whites. 白色的 好 Whites. Okay. - 有颜色的放入另一部 - 有颜色的 - A whole other machine for your colors. - Colors. 还要第三部洗你的… And then a third for your, uh... 贴身衣物 也就是你的胸罩… ...delicates. And that would be your bras... 你的小内裤之类的 ...and your underpanty things. 这些是白色的棉质内裤 Okay, well, these are white cotton panties. 是要跟白色的衣物放一起 还是跟贴身衣物呢？ Would they go with whites or with delicates? 这得由你自由决定了 That would be a judgment call. 他好可爱 He's so cute! 你们在哪里长大的？ So where did you guys grow up? - 布鲁克林高地 - 克里夫兰 - Brooklyn Heights. - Cleveland. 哈 嗨… Ha. Heh, heh, heh. - 怎么会这样？ - 我的天 - How did that happen? - Oh, my God! 怎么了？ What? 我突然有一种… I suddenly had the feeling I was... 往下掉的感觉 ...falling. 现在没有了 But I'm not. 你跟安琪拉在一起 是吧？ So you and Angela, huh? 没错 就是这样 Yep. Pretty much. - 你是个幸运的男人 - 是啊 - You're a lucky man. - Yeah. 知道我最想念她哪里吗？ You know what I miss the most about her? 她吃东西时发出的可爱的小噪音 That cute nibbley noise she makes when she eats. 就像一只快乐的小松鼠… Like a happy little squirrel... 或是黄鼠狠 ...or a weasel. 我没注意到 I never really noticed. 哦 有 有 你要注意听 Oh, yeah, yeah. Listen for it. 摩妮卡 摩妮卡很正 Monica. Monica is great. 对 她是啊 Yeah. Yeah, she is. 不过 不会长久 But it's not gonna last. 对我而言 她在床上需要太多了 She's too much for me in bed. 嘿咻方面 Sexually. 我得告诉你 鲍柏超棒的 I've gotta tell you, Bob is terrific. 对 说的可不是？ Yeah, isn't he? 能遇到一个聪明 有趣 It's so great to meet a guy who's smart and funny... 成熟度超过八岁的男人真好 ...and has an emotional age beyond 8. 还有你知道吗？他在床上的表现让人难以置信 You know what else? He's unbelievable in bed! 哇 Wow! 我哥连他几岁失去童贞 都没告诉过我 My brother never even told me when he lost his virginity. 唔 Huh. 那很好啊 That's nice. 你可以的 就像扯下OK绷带一样 You can do this. It's like pulling off a Band-Aid. 动作快点 伤口就会露出来了 Just do it really fast, and then the wound is exposed. 快 快去 Go! Go! 珍妮丝 Janice... 嗨 珍妮丝 Hi, Janice. 好 开始了 我想我们不该再交往下去了 Okay, here we go. I don't think we should go out anymore. 珍妮丝 Janice. 好的 All right. 好吧 Well... 好 你说了 Well, there you go. 停 停 停 Stop it, stop it, stop it. 我知道说来有点蠢… Okay, I know this is gonna sound really stupid... 不过我觉得 如果我今天能成功… ...but I feel that if I can do this... 如果我真的能洗我自己的衣服… ...if I can actually do my own laundry... 这世上就没有我办不到的事了 ...there isn't anything I can't do. 我觉得 这句话一点也不蠢 That does not sound stupid to me. 卡萝离开我后 我第一次自己煮东西时… No, it's like... The first time I had to make dinner for myself after Carol left me... 对不起 我们的时间到了 下一次《罗斯秀》… I'm sorry, that's all the time we have. Next on Ross... 好 Okay. - 啊哦 - 干嘛？ - Uh-oh. - What, "uh-oh"? 啊哦… Uh-oh... 啊哦 衣服洗好了 Uh-oh, the laundry's done. 这是一首歌 It's a song. 我们在洗衣服时唱的 The laundry song that we sing. 啊哦 衣服洗好了 Uh-oh, the laundry's done 怎么了嘛？ What's the matter? 没什么 Nothing. Nothing. 衣服洗好了 The laundry's done 得了 让我看 Come on, show me. 只是你的白衣服里有一只红袜子 所以就… It's just that you left a red sock in with your whites, and now... - 统统变成有点粉红的 - 噢 - ...everything's kind of pink. - Oh. 统统变成粉红的？ Everything's pink? 只有那只红袜子例外 还是红的 Except for the red sock, which is still red. 别难过 这种事大家都会遇到的 Don't be upset. It can happen to anyone. 可是这次发生在我身上 But it didn't. It happened to me. 天哪 我会变成 一只粉红凯蒂猫 God, I'm gonna look like a big Marshmallow Peep! 我在干什么？ What am I doing? What am I doing? 我爸爸说的对 我无法独立 My father's right! I can't live on my own. 我连洗衣服都不会 I can't even do laundry! 那个超狗气球出状况了 Something went wrong with Underdog... 他们又没办法帮狗头充气 ...and they couldn't get his head to inflate. 总之… So anyway... 狗头就在百老汇上直直滚下去 对吧？ ...his head is, like, flopping down Broadway. Right? 我就在想... And I'm thinking... 这真的是不对劲 ...how inappropriate this is. 我的眼里有东西 乔伊 我们到灯光下看看好吗？ I've got something's in my eye. Joey, could we check it in the light, please? - 哦 我的天 - 干嘛？ - Oh, my God! - What? 我们坐在同一桌吗？简直说是… Hello! Were we at the same table? It's like... 近亲乱伦 ...cocktails in Appalachia. - 他们很亲密 - 亲密？她的舌头都跑到他耳朵里了 - Come on, they're close. - Close? She's got her tongue in his ear. 你跟罗斯就没胡闹过 Like you've never got a little rambunctious with Ross. 乔伊 这很病态 很恶心 很… Joey, this is sick. It's disgusting. It's... 这不是真的 对不对？ ...not really true, is it? 谁晓得什么才是真的？ Who's to say what's true? 你在想什么？ What were you thinking? 这没什么好得意的 好吗？ Look, I'm not proud of this, okay? 嗯 也许是有一点啦 Well, maybe I am a little. - 啊 - 哇 - Oh. - Ow! - 我要走了 - 等一下 - I'm out of here! - Wait! Come on! 你喜欢他 我要她 You like him. I want her. 他喜欢你 He likes you. - 真的？ - 对 - Really? - Yeah. 如果我们团结起来 就凭我们二人… I'm thinking, if we put our heads together, between the two of us... 一定可以拆散他们 ...we can break them up. 对不起 真不敢相信我会出这种差错 I'm so sorry. I can't believe I did this. 你那个作家诺曼•梅勒的故事 让我笑到不行 I just couldn't stop laughing at your Norman Mailer story. 服务生？我们还要一盘鸡翅 Waiter? One more plate of chicken wings over here. 就像这样 我们根本不一样 Here's the thing. It's like we're different. 我是那种乒乒乒的人 你则是砰砰砰 I'm the bing, you're the boom... - 唔 - 哦 - Ow! - Oh! - 哦 我的天 - 喔 - Oh, my God! - Ow! - 我很抱歉 -喔 - I'm so sorry! - Ow! - 你还好吗 - 噢 - Are you okay? - Ow! 只是我的隐形眼镜 我的镜片跑了 It's just my lens. It's my lens. 我马上回来 I'll be right back. 我打中她的眼睛 打中她的眼睛 I hit her in the eye! I hit her in the eye! 这是史上最差劲的分手 This is the worst breakup in the history of the world! 哦 我的天 Oh, my God. 你到底喝了几杯？ How many of those have you had? 我不晓得 一百万杯吧 I don't know. A million! 钱德 放轻松 放轻松 想想你快乐的时光 Chandler, shh, shh. Easy, easy. Go to your happy place. - 我很好 我很好 - 好吧 - I'm fine, I'm fine. - All right. 我不好 她来了 I'm not fine. Here she comes. 在这里等 好吗？呼吸 Wait here, okay? Breathe. 你怎么办到的？ How do you do that? 就像一种天赋 It's like a gift. 以后我们一定要一起分手 We should always, always break up together. 我喜欢 I'd like that. 衣服干净了 这才是最重要的 You got the clothes clean. That's the important part. 我想也是 可惜现在全部看起来都像睡衣 I guess. Except everything looks like jammies now. 对不起 Whoa, I'm sorry. 抱歉 这推车是我们的 Excuse me. We had this cart. 我的腰以前也只有二十四寸 人生总是有得有失 I had a 24-inch waist. You lose things. 好了 别挡我的路 Now, come on. Get out of my way. 对不起 也许我没有说清楚 这推车是我们的 I'm sorry. Maybe I wasn't being clear. This was our cart. 嘿… 刚才又没有衣服在推车里 Hey, hey, hey. There aren't any clothes in it! 嘿… 不要乱订规则 Hey, hey, hey! Quit making up rules! 放手 快 这是我的推车 你知道是我先看到的 Let go! Come on, this is my cart. You know I saw it first. 给我听好 女人 如果你要这推车… Listen, Mitzi, if you want this cart... 就连我一起推走 ...you're gonna have to take me with it! 赞 你看到了没？ Yes! Did you see that? 你太厉害了 You were incredible. 各位先生 各位女士 看看这位全新的女性 A brand-new woman, ladies and gentlemen. 谢谢 没有你的话 我根本办不到的 I could not have done this without you. 好 Okay, um... 干衣机里还有衣服吗？ Uh... More clothes in the dryer? - 我没事 没事 - 你确定吗？ - I'm fine. I'm fine. - Are you sure? - 你确定你没事？ - 确定 - Are you sure you're okay? - Yeah. - 还会痛吗？ - 会 - Does it still hurt? - Yeah. 好主意 你所有的衣服都同色了 我也要这样做 What a neat idea. All your clothes match. I'm gonna do this. 嗨 Hi! 还顺利吗？ How'd it go? 太棒了 Excellent! 我们把那一对拆开了 然后各自保留一半 We ripped that couple apart and kept the pieces for ourselves. 好浪漫的故事 What a beautiful story. 对了 我没事 I'm fine, by the way. 我很抱歉 I'm sorry. - 钱德呢？ - 他需要一点疗伤的时间 - Where's Chandler? - He needed some time to grieve. 我自由了 我自由了 I'm free! I'm free! 应该是复原了 That ought to do it. # Friends.S01E06.1994.BluRay.1080p.x265.10bit.MNHD-FRDS.txt 你们看 是乔伊的照片 Oh, look, look! There's Joey's picture! 好兴奋喔 This is so exciting! 你总是能知道 谁没看过他的表演 You can spot someone who's never seen his plays. 他们无畏无惧 不知道末日将至 Notice, no fear. No sense of impending doom. 标题上的惊叹号让我害怕 The exclamation point scares me. 这不只是佛洛依德 是佛洛依德 It's not just Freud, it's Freud! 魔法即将出现 Shh. Magic is about to happen! 伊娃… Well, Eva... 我们的进展很不错 ...we've done some excellent work here. 我得说… And I would have to say... 你的问题相当清楚 ...your problem is quite clear. 你只想要个小小弟 All you want is a dinkle 你羡慕他人的小弟 What you envy's a schwang 一个让你叮叮当的小东西 A thing through which you can tinkle 可以玩弄或丢在那儿 To play with or simply let hang 我觉得受到冒犯 I feel violated. 有其他人感觉到只想剥了自己的皮… Did anybody else feel like peeling their skin off... 好做点其他事情吗？ ...to have something else to do? 罗斯 十点钟 Ross, 10:00. 是吗？感觉像凌晨两点了 Is it? It feels like 2. 不是啦 是十点钟 No, 10:00! 有个漂亮的女人 在八 九 十点钟方向 There's a beautiful woman at 8, 9, 10:00! 哈罗 Hello! 她太棒了 She's amazing! 让我梦想中的女性都变成又矮又胖的秃头男性 She makes the women I dream about look like short, fat, bald men. 过去跟她说话啊 她又没有伴 Go over to her. She's not with anyone. 我要用什么开场白？ And what would my opening line be? 不好意思… Excuse me... 别这样 她也是一个人 你办得到的 Come on, she's a person. You can do it. 我根本配不上她 罗斯 你说对不对？ Could she be more out of my league? Ross, back me up. 他这辈子永远都别想要把到那种美女 He could never get a woman like that in a million years. 但是我们常看到很漂亮的女生 跟不怎么样的男生在一起 But you always see these beautiful women with these "nothing" guys. 你可以当那种男生啊 You could be one of those guys. - 可以啊 - 真的吗？ - You could do that. - You think? 绝对可以 Absolutely! 我不敢相信 我竟然还有这种念头 I can't believe I'm even considering this. - 我一向谨言慎行 - 快去 - I'm very aware of my tongue. - Come on. 来了 Here goes. 什么事？ Yes? 你好 Hi. Um... Ahem. 好 接下来要说… Okay, next word would be... 钱德 ...uh, Chandler. 钱德是我的名字 嗯… Chandler is my name and, uh... 你好 Hi! 你已经说过了 Yes, you said that. 没错 但我没说的是… Yes! Yes, I did. But what I didn't say... 我想说的是… What I wanted to say was, uh... 你有空想和我一起出去约会吗？谢谢 晚安 ...would you like to go out with me? Thank you. Good night. 钱德？ Chandler? 他来了 There he is! - 我不知道你会跳舞 - 你参与戏剧演出耶 - I didn't know you could dance! - You were in a play! 你们觉得怎样？ What'd you think? - 我不知道你会跳舞 - 你参与戏剧演出耶 - I didn't know you could dance! - You were in a play! 别这样 没那么糟吧 我至少是主角 Come on, it wasn't that bad. I was the lead. 比轮唱好吧 至少可以看到我的头 It was better than the troll thing. At least you got to see my head. - 没错 - 我们有看到你的头 - You're right. - We saw your head. 她说好 她说好 She said yes! She said yes! 哇 Wow! 这部剧烂透了 Awful play, man! Whoa! 她叫做欧若拉 是意大利人 说我的名字时超好听的 Her name's Aurora. She's Italian and she pronounces my name "Chandler." 我喜欢那样的叫法 噢 引座员叫我把这个给你 I like that better. The usher gave me this to give to you. - 什么东西？ - 伊斯特•李奥纳德 经纪公司 - What is it? - The Estelle Leonard Talent Agency. 哇 有经纪公司给我名片 或许他们想跟我签约 An agency left me its card. Maybe they wanna sign me! 在看完今天的表演后？ Based on this play? 在看完今天的表演后 Based on this play! 各位 Hey, kids! 嘿 钱德 Hey, Chandler. 不 这条线是热情 这一条只是线而已 No, because this line is passion, and this is just a line. 我不敢相信我已经来七秒钟了 却没有人问我约会的情况 I've been here seven seconds, and you haven't asked me how my date went. 你的约会怎么样 钱德？ How was your date, Chandler? 无法置信 It was unbelievable! 我没遇到过像她这样的人 她的一生超精彩的 I've never met anyone like her. She's had the most amazing life! 她参加过以色列军队 She was in the Israeli army. 幸好没有子弹打到引擎 None of the bullets hit the engine block... 我们才能逃到边境 ...so we made it to the border. 但也只是侥幸逃出 我… But just barely and I... 我整晚都在讲我的事 真的很抱歉 I've been talking about myself all night long. I'm sorry. 那你呢？告诉我你的故事 What about you? Tell me your stories. 好 有一次… All right, once... 有一次我去搭地铁 ...once I got on the subway, right? 那时很晚了… And it was at night... 我一直坐到布鲁克林站… ...and I rode it all the way to Brooklyn... 只为了好玩 ...just for the hell of it. 我们聊到两点 实在是完美的夜晚 We talked till 2. It was this perfect evening. 多多少少啦 More or less. 突然问 我们发现自己身处叶门 Suddenly, we realized we were in Yemen. 抱歉 谁是我们…？ I'm sorry, so "we" is? 就是我和瑞克 "We" is me and Rick. - 谁是瑞克？ - 谁是瑞克？ - Who's Rick? - Who's Rick? 我先生 My husband. 噢 Ooh. - 噢 所以你离婚了？ - 没有 - Oh, so you're divorced? - No. 抱歉 所以你在守寡吗？希望如此 I'm sorry. So you're widowed? Hopefully? 不 我还是有夫之妇 No, I'm still married. 那你先生对于你在这里 有什么想法？ So how would your husband feel about you sitting here with me... 还把脚滑到我的脚上面… ...sliding your foot so far up my leg... 连口袋里有多少零钱 都数得出来 ...you can count the change in my pocket? 别担心 Don't worry. 我想说他应该不会介意 因为他也没有太介意伊森 I imagine he'd be okay with you because he's okay with Ethan. 伊森？谁是伊森？ Ethan? There's an Ethan? 伊森是我的… Ethan is my... 男朋友 ...boyfriend. 什么？ What? 跟我解释一下 竟然你已经有丈夫跟男友了 So, uh, what kind of relationship do you imagine us having... 你希望我们会有什么样的关系？ ...if you already have a husband and a boyfriend? 我想主要是性关系吧 I suppose, mainly sexual. 哈 Huh. 很遗憾没有成功 I'm sorry it didn't work out. 什么没有成功？我星期四还会再跟她见面 What not work out? I'm seeing her again on Thursday. 你没有听到我说的故事吗？ Didn't you listen to the story? 太诡异了 你怎么可以 跟这样的女人交往？ How could you get involved with a woman like this? 我一开始也很难接受 但是想想其实百益无一害 I had trouble with it at first, but I get all the good stuff. 只要谈天说笑 还有性… All the fun, all the talking, all the sex... 完全不用负责任 ...and no responsibility. 这可是每个男人的梦想 This is every guy's fantasy! 才不是 罗斯 这是你的梦想吗？ That is not true. Ross, is this your fantasy? 当然不是 No, of course not. 是 没错 Yeah. Yeah, it is. 所以你们不介意 跟有其他伴侣的女性交往？ You'd go out with someone else who's going out with someone else? 我做不到 I couldn't. 很好 Good for you. 我和女性交往时 我必须知道… When I'm with a woman, I need to know... 我交往的人 比她还多 ...that I'm going out with more people than she is. 一夫一妻 You know... 确实值得商榷 ...monogamy can be a tricky concept. 就人类学上的角度来说… I mean, anthropologically... 好吧 你们永远都不会知道了 Fine. Now you'll never know. 我们只是开玩笑啦 说吧 We're kidding. Tell us. - 我们都想知道 - 说啦 - We wanna know. - Come on! 好吧 理查•李基有一个理论… All right. There's a theory put forth by Richard Leakey... 嗒哒 Ta-da! 我们以后都要用这样的方式打招呼吗？我还挺喜欢的 Are we greeting each other this way now? I like that. 你们看 我打扫了 Look! I cleaned! 我擦了窗户 地板 I did the windows. I did the floors. 我还用了吸尘器所有的接头 除了圆的那一个 I used all the attachments on the vacuum except for that round one. 我不知道那是用来做什么的 I don't know what it's for. 没有人知道 我们也不该问 Nobody knows, and we're not supposed to ask. 你们觉得怎么样？ What do you think? - 很干净 - 真的 很棒 - It's very clean. - Really, it looks great! 我看到你移动了绿色的垫椅 Oh. Heh. I see you moved the green ottoman. 啊哦 Uh-oh. 是怎么发生的？ How did that happen? 不知道啊 我觉得放那边比较好看 I don't know. I thought it looked better there. 而且茶几旁边 也多一个座位 And also, it's an extra seat around the coffee table. 对 是蛮有趣的 Yeah, it's interesting. 这样好了 只是好玩… But you know what? Just for fun... 看看放在原本的位置会如何 ...let's see what it looked like in the old spot. 只是比较一下 Just to compare. 看一下 Let's see. Ha! 嗯 放在这里 也很棒 Well, it looks good there too. 先摆在这里吧 Let's leave it there for a while. 真不敢相信你试着搬动那个绿色的垫椅 I can't believe you tried to move the green ottoman. 幸好你没摊开杂志 Thank God you didn't fan out the magazines. 不然她会把你的眼睛挖出来 She'll scratch your eyes out. 我没有那么糟糕吧？ You guys, I am not that bad! 你有 摩妮卡 Yeah, you are. 还记得我跟你住在一起过吗？ Remember, I lived with you? 你就是一副… You were a little, you know... 这样说超不公平的 That is so unfair! 拜托 我们小时候 你的破娃娃是唯一不破的 When we were kids, yours was the only Raggedy Ann doll that wasn't raggedy. 好吧 我比较有责任心 有组织性 Okay, so I'm responsible. I'm organized. 但我也能很懒散 But, hey, I can be a kook! 好吧 懒女人 All right, you madcap gal! 想像这个情况 Try to imagine this. 电话帐单寄来了 但是你没有立刻付费 The phone bill arrives, but you don't pay it right away. - 为什么没有？ - 因为你很懒散 - Why not? - Because you're a kook! 所以你等到他们再寄一张通知给你 Instead, you wait until they send you a notice. 我做得到 I could do that. 好 你让我去买… Okay, then you let me go grocery shopping... 我买了洗衣精 ...and I buy laundry detergent. 但不是容易挤出来的那种 But it's not the one with the easy-pour spout. 怎么会有人这么做？ Why would someone do that? 有些人会这样想 One might wonder. 有人把杯子放在茶几上 没有杯垫 A glass is on the table. There's no coaster. 是一杯冷饮 在大热天之下 It's a cold drink. It's a hot day. 小水珠逐渐逼近桌面… Beads of condensation are inching their way closer to the wood... 不要说了 Stop it! 天哪 Oh, my God! 是真的 我是什么样的人？ It's true. Who am I? 摩妮卡 你是妈妈 Monica, you're Mom. 我的天啊 Uh-huh? Oh, my God! 好吧 Okay. 好 我会去的 Okay, I'll be there. 刚刚是我经纪人 That was my agent. 我的经纪人帮我安排在阿尔•帕西诺的新片中演出 My agent has just gotten me a job in the new Al Pacino movie! 太棒了 Whoa! That's great! 什么角色？ What's the part? 你们能相信吗？是阿尔•帕西诺耶 Can you believe this? Al Pacino! 他是我成为演员的原因 This guy's why I became an actor. "我失控？你才失控" "I'm out of order? You're out of order! "这整个法庭都失控了" This whole courtroom's out of order!" 说真的 是什么角色？ Seriously, what's the part? "当我以为已经出局时 他们又把我拉回" "Just when I thought I was out, they pull me back in!" 快点说啦 乔伊 是什么角色？ Come on. Seriously, Joey, what's the part? 你是…什么？ You're, you're... What? 我是他屁股的替身 好吗？ I'm his butt double, okay? 我饰演阿尔•帕西诺的屁股 I play Al Pacino's butt. 好吗？他开始冲澡… All right? He goes into the shower, and then... 我就演他的屁股 ...I'm his butt. 天啊 Oh, my God! 你们别这样 Come on, you guys. 这是部阿尔•帕西诺主演 大制作的电影 This is a real movie, and Al Pacino's in it and that's big! 不 真的太棒了 Oh, no, it's terrific. 你努力了这么多年… After all your years of struggling... 终于有机会挤进娱乐圈了 ...you've finally been able to crack your way into show business. 好吧 你们尽量开玩笑 我才不在乎 Okay, fine. Make jokes, I don't care. 这是我的一大突破 This is a big break for me! 你说得没错 You're right. It is. 那你要请我们去看屁股首映会吗？ So are you gonna invite us all to the big opening? - 我需要借点润肤霜 - 干嘛用的？ - I need to borrow some moisturizer. - For what? 你说呢？今天是大日子 What do you think? Today's the big day! 好 去厕所 想用什么都可以 Okay, go into the bathroom. Use whatever you want. 只要别跟我说 你在里面做了什么 Just don't ever tell me what you did in there. 谢了 Thank you. - 乔伊的妈妈打来 - 他在厕所 - Joey's mom's on the phone. - He's in the bathroom. - 你不想进去的 - 拜托 我们是室友耶 - You don't wanna go in there! - Come on, we're roommates. 我的眼睛啊… My eyes! My eyes! 我警告过你了 I warned you. 是谁这么吵？ Who is being loud? 噢 是摩妮卡 Oh, that would be Monica. 嘿 我可以借点东西吗？我想煮早餐给欧若拉吃 Can I borrow some things? I wanna make Aurora breakfast. 噢 你有整夜的时间能陪她？ You got the whole night, huh? 对 我只有二十分钟 直到伊森… Well, I only have 20 minutes until Ethan, so... 有人有点哀怨喔？ Do I sense a bit of resentment? 不…没有哀怨 相信我… No, no, no. No resentment. Believe me... 真的很值得 ...it's worth it, okay? 在感情关系中 总是有些特别难忘的时刻 In a relationship, you have these key moments... 让你一辈子都会记得 ...you'll remember for the rest of your life. 跟欧若拉在一起的每分每秒都像那样 Well, every single second is like that with Aurora. 而我刚刚浪费了三十五秒的时间跟你们说话 And I've just wasted 35 of them talking to you. 摩妮卡 你可以帮我开门吗？ So, uh, Monica, can you help me with the door? 钱德 以前的摩妮卡会提醒你… Um, Chandler, you know, the old Monica would remind you... 用塑胶刷 刷洗锅子 ...to scrub that Teflon pan with a plastic brush. 但是我不会那么做 But I'm not gonna do that. 该死 就聘请她 Damn it! Hire the girl. 大家准备好了吗？ Okay, everybody ready? 听着 我只想谢谢你 给我这么好的机会 Uh, listen, I just wanna thank you for this great opportunity. 脱掉浴袍 Lose the robe. 我脱？ Me? 那样才拍得成 That would work. 好 解开浴袍中 Right. Okay. Losing the robe! 好 浴袍脱完了 Okay, and the robe is lost. 各位 我想要一次就拍好 Everybody, I would like to get this in one take. 来吧 Let's roll it. 开水 Water's working. 开拍 And action! 卡 And cut! 屁股男 你在干什么？ Butt guy, what are you doing? 我在冲澡 I'm showering. 不 你在挤屁股 No, that was clenching. 我的想法是 这个家伙很难过 Well, the way I see it, the guy's upset here, you know? 他老婆死了 哥哥又失踪 His wife's dead, his brother's missing. 他的屁股这时候 应该会很生气 I think his butt would be angry here. 我认为他的屁股会想在午餐前拍好 I think his butt would like to get the shot before lunch. 再来一次 开水 Once again, rolling. Water working. 开拍 And action! 卡 又怎么了？ And cut! What was that? 我想表现出沉静的绝望 I was going for quiet desperation. 但如果你想问… But if you have to ask... 天啊 我好爱这些手指 God, I love these fingers. 谢谢 Thank you. 我其实是指我的手指 No, actually, I meant my fingers. 看看它们有多开心 Look at them. Look at how happy they are. - 天啊 我迟到了 - 不要… - Oh, my God, I'm late! - Oh, no, no, no. - 不要走 - 好 - Don't go, don't go. - Okay, okay. - 我真的得走 - 她要走了 - I have to. - Look, she's leaving. 对不起 他会等我 I'm sorry. He'll be waiting for me. 我以为你跟瑞克谈过了 I thought you talked to Rick. 不是瑞克 It's not Rick. 伊森？他可以陪你一整天的时间 Ethan? He gets the whole day with you! 不 是安德鲁 No, it's Andrew. 我知道会有好几年的时间… I know there'll be many moments... 我将后悔问你以下的问题 但是… ...when I'll regret asking the following question, but... 安德鲁是谁？ And Andrew is? 他是…新欢 He's... new. 你是说瑞克 伊森和我 无法满足你？ So you're not completely fulfilled by Rick, Ethan and myself? 我并不是… No, that's not exactly what I was... 不知道有多少女人… Most women would kill... 会被我们三个人迷倒 ...for three guys like us. 那你想要什么？ So, what do you want? 你 You. - 你已经有我了 - 不 只是你 - You have me. - No, no. Just you. 什么意思？ What do you mean? 甩掉其他人 Lose the other guys. 他们所有人吗？ Like, all of them? 别这样 我们在一起很开心 为什么不行？ Come on, we're great together. Why not? 我们为什么不能保持这样就好？ Why can't we just have what we have now? 只要谈天说笑跟性… Why can't we just talk, laugh and make love... 彼此没有任何负担？ ...without feeling obligated to one another? 今晚之前 我以为这也是你想要的 Up until tonight, I thought that's what you wanted too. 部分的我想要… Well, part of me wants that... 但我就像个双面人 ...but it's like I'm two guys. 其中一个说 "闭嘴 这样很棒" I mean, one guy's saying, "Shut up! This is great!" 但还有另一个人 But there's this other guy. 他每次都会挺身而出… It's the guy who wells up every time the Grinch's heart... 仗义直言 ...grows three sizes and breaks that measuring device. 他会说 "这太难了 快点脱身" He's saying, you know, "This is too hard. Get out, get out!" 那你会听哪个人的话？ So which one of the two guys will you listen to? 两个人的话我都听 他们一直插嘴 I have to listen to both. They don't let each other finish. 哪个人？ Which one? 第二个 The second guy. 我懂了 I see. 如果改变心意 就打给我 Call me if you change your mind. 抱歉 第一个人主管嘴唇 Sorry, the first guy runs the lips. 这样想吧 是你甩了她 Look at it this way. You dumped her! 对吧？这个女生… Right? I mean, this woman was... 超级性感… ...unbelievably sexy... 又美丽 聪明 超难追… ...and beautiful, intelligent, unattainable... 再说一次你为什么这么做 Tell me why you did this again? - 嘿 - 嘿 - Hey! - Hey! 电影明星来了 Movie star! 你不是那个在阿尔•帕西诺的新片中饰演屁股的人吗？ Aren't you the guy who plays the butt in the new Al Pacino movie? 不是 Nope. 不是？怎么了 大家伙？ No? What happened, big guy? 大家伙？ Big guy? 我就是突然想这么说嘛 It felt like a "big guy" moment. 我被炒鱿鱼了 I got fired! 他们说我太投入了 They said I acted too much with it. 我到处宣扬 I told everybody about this. 现在大家都会到戏院 想看我演… Everybody will be expecting to see me. 乔伊 没有人看得出来的 You know what? No one will be able to tell. 我妈妈会 My mom will. 这听起来很甜蜜… There's something so sweet... 却又很恶心 ...and disturbing about that. 六年来 我一直在演烂戏… I've done nothing but crappy plays for six years... 终于有机会了 却被我搞砸 ...and I finally get my shot, and I blow it! 或许这不是你的机会 Maybe this wasn't your shot. 我觉得当机会真的来临 你就会知道 I think when it's your shot, you know it's your shot. 感觉像是你的机会吗？ Did it feel like your shot? 很难说 我当时光着身体 Hard to tell. I was naked. 我不认为这是你的机会 I don't think this was your shot. 我甚至不认为 你只会有一个机会 I don't even think you just get one shot. 我真的相信 你会有一番作为 I really believe big things are gonna happen for you. I do. 你要想说有一天 有个小孩会说… You've gotta keep thinking about the day that some kid will go... "我拿到角色了 我要演乔伊•崔比亚尼的屁股" ..."I got the part! I'm gonna be Joey Tribbiani's ass!" 真的吗？你真贴心 You think? That's so nice. 来吧 Oh, come here. 抱歉 乔伊 我要去睡觉了 各位 I'm sorry, Joey. I'm gonna go to bed, guys. 晚安 Good night. 你要把你的鞋子留在这里吗？ You're gonna leave your shoes out here? 嗯 Uh-huh. 真的吗？就这样乱丢… Really? Just casually strewn about... 完全都不整齐？ ...in that reckless, haphazard manner? 无所谓 我明天再收拾 或者是改天 It doesn't matter. I'll get them tomorrow. Or not! 随便啦 Whenever. 她真的很懒 She is a kook. 如果你这么心烦 就去把鞋子收好 If it bothers you that much, just go out and get the shoes. 不 不要去 No, don't do this! 太蠢了 This is stupid! 我不需要证明任何事 我要去收拾 I don't have to prove anything. I'm gonna go get them. 但是这样 大家都会知道 But then everyone will know. 除非收好后 早上早点起来再放回去 Unless I get them, and then wake up really early and put them back. 谁来帮帮我啊 I need help! # Friends.S01E07.1994.BluRay.1080p.x265.10bit.MNHD-FRDS.txt 大伙们 中央咖啡厅很荣幸为大家介绍 Everybody. Shh. Uh, Central Perk is proud to present... 菲比•布非小姐的音乐 ...the music of Miss Phoebe Buffay. 谢谢 Thanks. 嗨 我要为大家演唱一首歌 歌曲内容描述 Hi. Um, I wanna start with a song that's about that moment... 你突然间了解人生真正的意义的那一刹那 ...when you suddenly realize what life is really all about. 好吧 要开始了 Okay, here we go. 好 非常谢谢大家 Okay. Thank you very much. 什么？ What...? 太棒了 这真是… Oh, great. This is just... 这真的是太酷了 大伙儿们 This is so cool, you guys. 全市大停电 The entire city's blacked out. 妈妈说是整个曼哈顿 布鲁克林以及皇后区 Mom says it's Manhattan, Brooklyn and Queens... 他们不知道何时能恢复供电 ...and doesn't know when it'll be back on. - 哇 - 大伙们 这是大消息 - Wow. - You guys, this is big. 长裤跟毛衣 怎么了？妈妈 Pants and a sweater. Why, Mom? 停电时我会遇见谁？ Who will I meet in a blackout? 电力公司的人？单身强盗？ Power-company guys? Eligible looters? 我们能待会再谈吗 好吧？ Can we talk about this later? Okay. 我能借用一下电话吗？ Can I borrow the phone? 我想打回我家问候一下我奶奶 I wanna call my apartment and check on my grandma. 我家电话是多少？ What's my number? 我没打过电话给自己 I never call me. 天啊 是她 Oh, my God. It's her. 那是维多利亚的秘密的模特儿 It's that Victoria Secret model. 她叫古德克什么来着的 Something Goodacre. 妈 我是吉儿 Hi, Mom, it's Jill. 她说的对 她是吉儿 吉儿•古德克 She's right. It's Jill. Jill Goodacre. 我的天啊 Oh, my God. 我跟吉儿•古德克被困在提款机的门廊里 I am trapped in an ATM vestibule with Jill Goodacre. 这是提款机的门廊吗？或许是提款机的中庭才对 Is it a vestibule? Maybe it's an atrium? 对 那才是重点 白痴 Yeah, that is the part to focus on, you idiot. 我没事 我被困在提款机的门廊里 Yeah, I'm fine. I'm just stuck at the bank in an ATM vestibule. 吉儿说这是门廊 Jill says vestibule... 我投门廊一票 ...I'm going with vestibule. 我没事 I'm fine. 我不是一个人 No, I'm not alone. 我不知道 一个男人 I don't know. Some guy. 哦 一个男人 我是一个男人 Oh, some guy. I am some guy. 吉儿 昨晚我看到你跟一个男人在一起 Hey, Jill, I saw you with some guy last night. 对 他是一个男的 Yes, he was some guy. 大伙们 Hey, everyone. 主持今晚停电仪式的是 崔比亚尼祭司 Officiating at tonight's blackout is Rabbi Tribbiani. 钱德的前任室友是犹太人 我们只有这些蜡烛 Chandler's old roommate was Jewish, and these are the only candles we have... 光明节快乐 ...so happy Hanukkah. 你们看 丑裸男点了一堆蜡烛 Ooh, look. Ugly Naked Guy lit a bunch of candles. 噢 Ooh. 哦 Oh! 那一定很痛 Ooh. That had to hurt. 好吧 已经过了十四分钟半 All right, all right. It's been 14 and a half minutes... 你一句话都没说 天啊 ...and you still haven't said one word. Oh, God. 快做点什么 跟她接触 笑一个 Do something. Just make contact. Smile. 很不错 There you go. 你吓坏她了 You're definitely scaring her. 你要打电话吗？ Uh, would you like to call somebody? 对 我要打电话给三百位高中同学 Yeah, about 300 guys I went to high school with. 对 谢谢 Yeah, thanks. 喂 Hello? - 是我 - 是钱德 - It's me. - It's Chandler. 你没事吧？ Are you okay? 我很好 Yeah, I'm fine. 我被困在提款机的门廊 I'm stuck in an ATM vestibule... 跟吉儿•古德克在一起 ...with Jill Goodacre. 什么？ What? 我被困在 I'm stuck... 提款机的门廊 ...in an ATM vestibule... 跟吉儿•古德克在一起 ...with Jill Goodacre. 我完全听不懂你在说什么 I have no idea what you said. 叫乔伊来听电话 Put Joey on the phone. 什么事？ What's up, man? 我被困在 I'm stuck... 提款机的门廊 ...in an ATM vestibule... 跟吉儿•古德克在一起 ...with Jill Goodacre. 我的天啊 Oh, my God. 他被困在提款机的门廊 跟吉儿•古德克在一起 He's trapped in an ATM vestibule with Jill Goodacre. 钱德 听着 Chandler, listen. 别以为我没那种念头 Yeah, like that thought never entered my mind. 快一点 Come on, somebody. 轮到我了 I'll go. I'll go. 大四那年在桌球台上 Okay, um, senior year of college, on a pool table. - 噢 - 桌球台？ - Ooh. - Pool table? 那是我的好妹妹 That's my sister. 我最奇怪的地点是… Okay, okay. My weirdest place would have to be... 纽约市立图书馆二楼的女厕 ...the women's room on the second floor of the New York City Public Library. 天啊 你去图书馆做什么？ Oh, my God. What were you doing in a library? - 菲比 你呢？ - 密尔瓦基 - Pheebs, what about you? - Oh, um, Milwaukee. 罗斯 Uh, Ross? 一九八九年迪士尼乐园的 "小世界" Disneyland, 1989. "It's a small world after all." 不可能 No way. 游乐设施坏了 The, uh, ride broke down... 卡萝跟我躲在机器荷兰小孩后面 ...so Carol and I went behind a couple of those mechanical Dutch children. 他们修好游乐设备后 要我们永远别回魔法王国 They fixed the ride, and we were asked never to return to the Magic Kingdom. 瑞秋 Ooh. Rachel? 少来 我已经说过了 I already went. - 才没有 - 我说过了 - You did not go. - Yes, I did. 快告诉我们 Tell us. Come on. 好吧 我最奇怪的地点是… All right, uh, the weirdest place would have to be... 床脚 ...the foot of the bed. - 不会吧？ - 冠军已经出炉 - Step back. - We have a winner. 我从没有过那么激情的关系 I've never had a relationship with that kind of passion. 一定要在游乐园跟某人做爱 Where you have to have somebody right there in the middle of a theme park. 那是那里唯一不必排队的地方 It was the only thing to do there that didn't have a line. 巴瑞连在迷你高尔夫球场都不愿意吻我 Well, Barry wouldn't even kiss me on a miniature-golf course. - 少来了 - 没错 - Come on. - No. 他说我们会挡到后面的人 He said we were holding up the people behind us. 你没有嫁给他是因为… And you didn't marry him because? 你觉得有人终其一生 Do you think there are people that go through life... 都不会有那种… ...never having that kind of? - 或许吧 - 真的吗？ - Probably. - Really? 但我得告诉你一件事 大家都太高估激情了 I'll tell you something. Passion is way overrated. - 对 - 没错 - Yeah, right. - It is. 最后激情会褪去 Eventually, it kind of burns out. 你希望留下信任跟安全感 But hopefully what you're left with is trust and security and, uh... 我前妻则是成了女同志 In my ex-wife's case, lesbianism. 对错过激情的人来说 For all those people who miss out on that, uh, passion thing... 那是件好事 ...there's other good stuff. 好吧 Okay. 我不相信那种事会发生在你身上 But, um, I don't think that'll be you. - 是吗？ - 嗯 - You don't? - Mm-mm. 我看得出来 See, I see, uh... 未来你会有段非常激情的关系 ...big passion in your future. - 真的吗？ - 嗯 - Really? - Mm-hm. - 你那么认为？ - 没错 - You do? - I do. 罗斯 你真的是太棒了 Ross, you're so great. 啊 Ah. 那是不可能的 It's never gonna happen. - 什么？ - 你跟瑞秋 - What? - You and Rachel. 为什么？ Why not? 因为你迟迟不肯展开行动 Because you waited too long to make your move... 现在你们进入 "朋友区" ...and now you're in the "Friend Zone." 不 我不在那一区 No, no, no. I'm not in the Zone. 罗斯 你还是区长呢 No, Ross. You're mayor of the Zone. 我只是在慢慢来 好吗？ Look, I'm taking my time, all right? 我在打基础 I'm laying the groundwork. 对 每天我越来越靠近… Every day I get a little bit closer to, uh... 成为神父的日子 Priesthood. 我得告诉你 她不知道你在想什么 Ross, I'm telling you, she has no idea what you're thinking. 如果你不快约她出去 你们会永远只能做朋友 If you don't ask her out soon, you'll end up stuck in the Zone forever. 我会的 我只是… I will, I will. 在等时机成熟 I'm waiting for the, uh, right moment. 什么？ What? - 现在？ - 对 - What, now? - Yeah. 你觉得哪里不对劲 美酒？ What's messing you up? The wine? 蜡烛？月光？ The candles? The moonlight? Huh? 你只需要走过去跟她说 "瑞秋 我…" You gotta go up to her and say, "Look, Rachel, I think..." - 嘘 - 嘘 - Shh! - Shh! - 什么？ - 我们会嘘个不停 - What are we shushing? - We're shushing... 是因为我们想听见声音 ...because we're trying to hear something. - 什么声音？ - 你没听到吗？ - What? - Uh, don't you hear that? 啊 Ah. - 看吧 - 哈 - See? - Huh. - 你要吃口香糖吗？ - 是无糖的吗？ - Would you like some gum? - Oh. Is it sugarless? - 抱歉 不是 - 不用了 谢谢 - Uh, sorry, it's not. - Then, no, thanks. 那是怎么一回事？ What the hell was that? 别忘了 吉儿•古德克请你吃口香糖 一定要接受 Mental note: If Jill Goodacre offers you gum, you take it. 就算她要你吃动物尸体 你也得接受 If she offers you mangled animal carcass, you take it. 纽约市停电了 New York City has no power 牛奶发臭了 And the milk is getting sour 但我一点都不怕 But to me it is not scary 因为我不吃奶 'Cause I stay away from dairy 啦啦… La-la La-la-la-la-la - 来吧 - 你要开口了？ - Here goes. - You'll do it? - 没错 - 需要我帮忙吗？ - I'll do it. - Want help? 你敢出来就死定了 You come out there, you're a dead man. 罗斯… Ross, Ross. 祝你好运 Good luck, man. 谢谢 Thanks. - 好吧 - 好吧 - Okay. - Okay. - 你要去哪里？ - 外面 - Where you going? - Outside. 你不能出去 You can't go out there. - 为什么？ - 那是有原因的 - Why not? - Because of, uh, the reason. 什么原因？ And that would be? 我不能告诉你 I, uh... I can't tell you. 乔伊 发生了什么事？ Joey, What's going on? 听着 你得发誓 你不会告诉罗斯是我说的 Okay, listen. You gotta promise you'll never, ever tell Ross that I told you. - 什么事？ - 他在筹划你的生日派对 - About what? - He's planning your birthday party. 天啊 我爱他 Oh, my God. I love him. 你最好表现出讶异的样子 You better act surprised. - 为什么？ - 我的惊喜派对 - About what? - My surprise party. - 什么惊喜派对？ - 别装了 乔伊都跟我说了 - What surprise party? - Oh, stop it. Joey already told me. 他没有告诉我 Well, he didn't tell me. 别看我 那是罗斯的事 Don't look at me. This is Ross' thing. 这太老套了 每次我都是最后知道的人 This is so typical. I'm always the last to know everything. - 才怪 我们告诉你很多事 - 嗯哼 - You are not. We tell you stuff. - Uh-huh. 钱德被孔雀咬伤 我是最后一个知道的人 I was the last one to know when Chandler got bit by the peacock at the zoo. 我是最后一个知道 你当初暗恋乔伊的人 I was the last to know you had a crush on Joey when he was moving in. 什么？ What? 看起来我是倒数第二个 Oh. Looks like I was second to last. 真的好漂亮 It's so nice. 我有个问题 Hey, I have a question. 事实上它不是个问题 Uh, actually, it's not so much a question... 那只是好奇… ...it's more of a general wondering... 而已 ...ment. - 好吧 - 好吧 - Okay. - Okay. 我要说了 Here goes. 我一直都想要… Um, well, for a while now, I've been wanting to, um... - 哦 - 没错 - Oh. - Yes, that's right. 看看那只小猫咪 Look at that little kitty. 什么？ What? 攀上世界顶端俯瞰众生 I'm on the top of the world Looking down on creation 我能找到的唯一解释 And the only explanation I can find 就是你出现后我找到的真爱 Is the love that I found Ever since you've been around 好吧 这是急救喷雾剂 不会痛的 All right, this is just Bactine. It won't hurt. 噢… Ow. Ow. 抱歉 那是蜡 Sorry, that was wax. 可怜的小杜弟吓得半死 我们得找到他的主人 Poor little Tootie's scared. We should find his owner. 我们何不将可怜小杜弟放在走廊上？ Why not put "poor little Tootie" in the hall? 在停电的时候？他会绊倒的 During a blackout? She'll get trampled. 是吗？ Yeah? 我想了一下 口香糖很完美 You know, on second thought, gum would be perfection. 口香糖很完美？ Gum would be perfection? 口香糖很完美 Gum would be perfection. 我应该说 "口香糖很棒" 或 "我要来一块" 但是不 Could've said, "Gum would be nice." "I'll have a stick." But, no. 对我来说口香糖很完美 For me, gum is perfection. 我恨自己 I loathe myself. 不 她们是修女 她们憎恨所有生物 Oh, no, the Mellons. They hate all living things, right? 哦 Oh. 嗨 我们刚刚发现这只猫 Hi. We just found this cat... 我们在找他的主人 ...and we're looking for the owner. 对 他是我的猫 Um, yeah, it's, uh... It's mine. 他似乎很讨厌你 你确定？ He seems to hate you. Are you sure? 对 他是我的猫 快还我 Yeah. It's my cat. Give me my cat. 等一下 他叫什么名字？ Wait a minute. What's his name? 巴伯… 钮扣 Um, Bob... Buttons. - 巴伯钮扣？ - 嗯哼 - Bob Buttons? - Uh-huh. 没错 来吧 巴伯钮扣 Bob Buttons. Here, Bob Buttons. 噢 Oh! 你是个大坏蛋 You are a very bad man. 你们欠我一只猫 You owe me a cat. 来吧 小猫咪 Here, kitty, kitty, kitty. 来吧 小猫咪 Here, kitty, kitty. 你跑到哪里去了？小猫咪 Where did you go, little kitty, kitty, kitty? 小猫咪 快来吧… Kitty, kitty, kitty. Come here, kitty, kitty, kitty, kitty, kitty... 嗨 Hi. 哇 Wow. 来吧 幸运数字六 Come on, lucky sixes. 大伙们 他是巴洛 Everybody, this is Paolo. 巴洛 我来跟你介绍我的朋友 Paolo, I want you to meet my friends. - 她是摩妮卡 - 嗨 - This is Monica... - Hi. - 乔伊 - 嗨 - ...and Joey... - Hi. - 罗斯 - 嗨 - ...and Ross. - Hi. 他不太会说英文 Ha, ha. He doesn't speak much English. 大富翁 Monopoly. 快看 Look at that. 那么… So, uh... 巴洛是哪来的？ Where did, uh, Paolo come from? 我想是意大利 Italy, I think. Heh. 不 我是说今晚他是从哪里突然进入我们的生活里 No, I mean tonight, in the building? Suddenly into our lives? 那只猫是巴洛的猫 真的很有趣吧？ The cat turned out to be Paolo's cat. Isn't that funny? 那真的很有趣 瑞秋一直摸他 That is funny. And Rachel keeps touching him. 我到处找过了 但就是找不到那只猫 I looked all over the building and I couldn't find the kitty anywhere. 我找到他了 他是巴洛的猫 Oh, I found him. It was Paolo's cat. 又来了 我又是最后一个知道的人 Ah. Well, there you go. Last to know again. 既然没有人告诉我 我想他是巴洛吧？ And I'm guessing, since nobody told me, this is Paolo? 巴洛 她是菲比 Oh. Paolo, this is Phoebe. 说得对 You betcha. 好吧 接下来是什么？ All right. Okay. What next? 吹泡泡 好主意 Blow a bubble. A bubble's good. 那是种雅气的表现 看起来很顽皮 It's got a, uh, boyish charm. It's impish. 来吧 Here we go. 做得好 小顽皮 Nice going, imp. 没事 我只需要… Okay. It's okay. All I need to do is... 伸手将它塞回嘴里 ...reach over and put it back in my mouth. 救得好 回到正轨 我… Good save. We're back on track and I'm... 在吃别人的口香糖 ...chewing someone else's gum. 这不是我的口香糖 天啊 This is not my gum. 我的天哪… Oh, my God. Oh, my God. 现在你被噎住了 And now you're choking. 你没事吧？ Are you all right? 天啊 你被噎住了 Oh, my God. You're choking. 好一点了吗？ Better? 对 Yes. 谢谢 那是… Thank you. That was... 那是… That was... 完美？ Perfection? 他说了什么事那么好笑？ What'd he say that was so funny? 我真的不知道 I have absolutely no idea. 那太老套了 That's classic. 天啊 大伙们 我在做什么？ My God, you guys. What am I doing? 这太不像我了 This is so un-me. 如果你答应 我可以帮你上 If you want, I'll do it. 我知道 我好想咬住他的下唇 I know. I just wanna bite his bottom lip. 但我不会那么做 But I won't. 天啊 他第一次对着我笑 God. The first time he smiled at me... 那三秒钟比我跟巴瑞在百慕达度过的三星期还刺激 ...those three seconds were more exciting than three weeks in Bermuda with Barry. 你们有租摩托车吗？ Did you rent mopeds? 因为我听说… Because I've heard... 那不是现在的重点 Oh, it's not about that right now. Okay. 我知道这超肤浅的 而且我们没有共通点 I know it's totally superficial, and we have nothing in common... 连说的语言都不一样 ...and we don't even speak the same language... 但是天啊 ...but, God. 巴洛 嗨 Paolo, hi. - 罗斯 - 听着 - Ross. - Listen, uh... 有件事你必须知道 Listen, um, heh, something you should, uh, know. 瑞秋跟我… Rachel and I are... 我们之间有感觉 We're kind of a thing. - 感觉？ - 对 感觉 - Thing? - Thing. Yes, thing. - 你们有性关系？ - 不 - You have the sex? - No. 不 技术上来说我们没有性关系 但那… No, no. Um, technically, the sex is not being had. But that's, uh... 那不是重点 That's not the point. 重点是瑞秋跟我应该… The point is that, uh, Rachel and I should be, uh... 瑞秋跟我应该在一起 Well, Rachel and I should be together. 如果你… And if you get in the, uh... - 上床… - 不 - In bed? - No. 不 我不是那个意思 Ha. No, not where I was going. 如果你介入我们之间的感觉 If you get in the way of us becoming a thing... 那么我会非常难过 ...then, uh, I would be, well, very sad. 哦 Oh. 所以你… So do you, um? - 你会的英文不多？ - 我只懂一些 - You do know a little English? - Little. 你知道什么是 "讨厌鬼" 吗？ Do you know the word crap-weasel? 不 那真的很有趣 你是讨厌鬼 No? That's funny, you are a huge crap-weasel. 钱德 我们已经玩了一小时 看好了 真的很简单 Chandler, we've been here for an hour doing this. Watch, it's easy. - 准备好了吗？ - 好 - Ready? - Mm-hm. 好吗 试试看？ Okay? Now try it. 不 你得把它甩出去 You gotta whip it. 快看 最后一根蜡烛要熄了 Look, look. The last candle's about to burn out. 10 9 8 7… Ten, nine, eight, seven... 负46 负47 负48 ...minus 46, minus 47, minus 48... - 谢谢 - 谢谢 - Thank you. - Thanks. 没有灯光感觉好恐怖 Kind of spooky without any lights. 大伙们 我有个好点子 Okay, guys, I have the definitive one. 罗斯 Uh, Ross... 或许我不该在这个时候说 This probably isn't the best time to bring it up... 但你得帮摩妮卡办个派对 ...but you have to throw a party for Monica. - 这真的太好玩了 - 对 - This has been fun. - Yes. 谢谢你借我电话 Yes. Thanks for, uh, letting me use your phone... 还救了我一命 ...and for saving my life. 再见 钱德 Well, goodbye, Chandler. 停电时我玩得很开心 I had a great blackout. 再见 See you. 我的帐号是7143457 我不知道你们有没有拍到 Hi. Um, I'm account number 7143457. And I don't know if you got any of that... 但我真的很想要拷贝一卷录影带 ...but I would really like a copy of the tape. # Friends.S01E08.1994.BluRay.1080p.x265.10bit.MNHD-FRDS.txt 帅哥 你好吗？ Hey, gorgeous. How's it going? 在日光灯底下吃着日本泡面 Dehydrated Japanese noodles under fluorescent lights. 还能更好吗？ Does it get better than this? 有个问题 你没有跟任何人交往吧？ Question: You're not dating, are you? 因为我遇见一个超适合你的完美对象 I met somebody who would be perfect for you. 完美可能会是个问题 You see, perfect might be a problem. 如果你说的是互相依赖 或自我毁灭… Had you said co-dependent or self-destructive... - 你星期六想去约会吗？ - 是的 很想 - You want a date Saturday? - Yes, please. 他很可爱 He is cute. - 他很好笑 他… - 他是男的？ - He's funny. He's... - He's a he? 是啊 Well, yeah. 天哪 我只是… Oh, God. I just... 你很棒… 天啊 You're nice... Oh, God. 很好 雪莉 我实在是没脸见人 Good, Shelly. Okay. I'm gonna go flush myself down the toilet now. 好 再见 Okay. Bye-bye. 经过那件事之后 真的很难继续享受拉面 很夸张对吧？ It's hard to enjoy noodles after that. Is that ridiculous? 你们能相信 她真的这样认为吗？ Can you believe she actually thought that? 唔 Um... 可以 Yeah. 我刚认识你的时候 我想说或许… Well, when I first met you, I thought maybe... 有可能… ...possibly... 你可能是 ...you might be. 真的？ You did? 然后你在菲比的生日派对上 一直对我的胸部说话… Then you spent Phoebe's birthday party talking to my breasts... 所以我想说应该不是 ...so then I figured maybe not. 你们其他人刚认识我的时候 有那么想吗？ Huh. Did, uh, any of the rest of you guys think that when you first met me? - 我有 - 我想有 - I did. - I think so. - 我没有 - 不… 我也没有 - Not me. - No, no, me neither. 不过大学时期的苏珊有 Although, uh, back in college, Susan Saladore did. 你在开玩笑 You're kidding. - 你有跟她说我不是吗？ - 没有 - Did you tell her I wasn't? - No. 因为我想跟她交往 It's because I wanted to go out with her too. 所以我跟她说 你和伯尼交往… So I told her, actually, you were seeing Bernie Spellman... 伯尼也喜欢她 ...who also liked her. 太有趣了 Well, this is fascinating. 那是什么原因？ So, uh, what is it about me? 我不知道 因为你很聪明 好笑… I don't know. Because you're smart, you're funny... 罗斯也是啊 你们有想过他是吗？ Ross is smart and funny. You ever think that about him? - 是啊 - 那到底是什么原因？ - Ha, ha. Yeah, right. - What is it? 我不知道 你就是… 你有种特质 Okay, I don't know. You just... You have a quality. - 没错 - 是吗？ - Yes, exactly. - Right? 对 某种特质 Yeah, a quality. "特质" 很好 因为我很担心你们会说得很模糊 "A quality." Good. I was worried you were gonna be vague about this. 喂？ Hello? 瑞秋 Oh. Rachel. 是罗马的巴洛 It's Paolo calling from Rome. 天啊 他从罗马打来 Oh, my God. Calling from Rome. 他从罗马打来 我也做得到啊 So he's calling from Rome. I could do that. 只要去罗马就行了 Just gotta go to Rome. 摩妮卡 你爸打进来 你可以讲快一点吗？ Monica, your dad just beeped in. Can you make it quick? 我在跟罗马通话 I'm talking to Rome. 爸 什么事？ Hey, Dad. What's up? 天哪 Oh, God. 罗斯 是奶奶 Ross, it's Nana. 嘿 Hey. - 你们好吗？ - 嘿 爸 - How you doing? - Hey, Dad. 她还好吗？ So, uh, how's she doing? 医生说只剩几小时了 The doctor says it's a matter of hours. - 你还好吗 妈妈？ - 我？我很好 - How are you, Mom? - Me? I'm fine, fine. 我很高兴你来了 I'm glad you're here. 你的头发怎么了？ What's with your hair? 怎么了？ What? 有什么不同？ What's different? 没有啊 Nothing. 噢 大概就是这样吧 Oh, maybe that's it. 她实在是令人难以置信 她母亲… She's unbelievable. Her mother's... 好 放轻松点 Okay, relax, relax. 看来我们还要在这里待一段时间 We are gonna be here a while, it looks like. 免不了还要谈你男友和工作的事 We still have boyfriends and your career to cover. 天啊 Oh, God. 她皮包里有发霉的薄荷糖 The fuzzy little mints at the bottom of her purse. 哦 Oh. 对 超恶心的 Yeah, they were gross. 你们知道我最爱什么吗？ Oh, you know what I love? 她的代糖 Her Sweet 'N Lows. 她老是从餐厅偷代糖 How she was always stealing them from restaurants. 不只是餐厅 还有我们家 Not just restaurants, from our house. 盖勒太太？ Mrs. Geller? 她看起来好小一只 She looks so small. 我知道 I know. 至少她现在有爷爷和菲利斯婶婶陪伴 Well, at least she's with Pop-Pop and Aunt Phyllis now. 再见了 奶奶 Goodbye, Nana. 别了 奶奶 Bye, Nana. 罗斯 Ross! 护士 Nurse. 怎么了？ What is going on? 护士不是说奶奶走了吗？ You know, uh, how the nurse said Nana had passed? 但并不是 Well, she's not quite. - 什么？ - 她没走 - What? - She's not passed. 她还在 她回来了 She's present. She's back. 怎么了？ What's going on? 她可能死了 She may have died. "她可能死了"？ "She may have died"? 我们还在观察 We're looking into it. 我进去看看 Uh, I'll go see. 这种事几乎不可能发生 This almost never happens. 现在她走了 Now she's passed. 我一定得知道 I just have to know, okay? 是我的头发吗？ Is it my hair? 没错 钱德 就是这样 你的头发 Yes, Chandler, that's exactly what it is. It's your hair. 对 你有同志头发 Yeah, you have homosexual hair. - 嘿 - 嗨 - Hey. - Hi. 那她…？ So did she? 两次 Twice. 真是糟透了 Oh, that sucks. 你们还好吗？ You guys okay? 我不知道 感觉好怪 I don't know. It's weird. 我知道她走了 但我就是不觉得… I know she's gone, but I just don't feel, uh... 或许是因为 她没有真的走了 Maybe that's because she's not really gone. 不 她走了 No, no, she's gone. 我们有检查 We checked. 很多次 A lot. 我是说 或许人不会真的走 No, I mean, maybe no one ever really goes. 自从我妈死掉后 我偶尔… Ever since my mom died, every now and then... 会感觉到她就在这里 ...I get this feeling that she's, like, right here, you know? 还有我初中最好的朋友 黛比… Oh. And Debbie, my best friend from junior high... 她去打迷你高尔夫时 被闪电击中 ...got struck by lightning on a miniature golf course. 用黄色的铅笔时 I always get this strong Debbie vibe... 我总是能感应到黛比 ...whenever I use one of those little yellow pencils. 我好想她 I miss her. 菲比 Aw. Here, Pheebs. 你想要这个吗？ Want this? - 噢 谢了 - 不客气 - Oh, thanks. - Sure. 我今早才把它削尖的 I just sharpened her this morning. 我完全不相信那一套 你死掉后… See, I don't believe any of that. I think when you're dead... 就是死了 消失了 成了虫的食物 ...you're dead. You're gone. You're worm food. 钱德看起来很像同志 对吧？ So Chandler looks gay, huh? 我不知道这是谁 但绝不是黛比 I don't know who this is, but it's not Debbie. 我以为要用密封的棺木 I thought it'd be a closed casket. 这不代表她不能看起来体面一点 Well, that doesn't mean she can't look nice. 孩子 你想你进得去吗？ Sweetie, you think you can get in there? 当然可以 I don't see why not. 我的牙齿矫正器在这里 Here's my retainer. 我一直在想… I was just thinking... - 轮到我的时候… - 爸 - ...when my time comes... - Dad. 听我说 Listen to me. 轮到我的时候 我想海葬 When my time comes, I wanna be buried at sea. 什么？ You what? 我想葬在海里 看起来很好玩 I wanna be buried at sea. It looks like fun. 解释一下 "好玩" 的意思 Define "fun." 别这样 那一天你们会很开心的 租艘船 带些午餐… Come on. You'll make a day of it. You'll get a boat, pack a lunch... 然后把你的尸体丢到海里 听起来真好玩 And then we throw your body in the water. Gee, that does sound fun. 大家都以为很了解我 Everyone thinks they know me. 大家都说 "杰克•盖勒 太好猜了" Everyone says, "Jack Geller, so predictable." 或许我走后 他们会说 "海葬？" Maybe after I'm gone, they'll say, "Buried at sea? Huh." 他们大概就会这样说 That's probably what they'll say. 我喜欢这样 I'd like that. - 嘿 美女 - 嘿 - Hey, gorgeous. - Hey. 听着 昨天的事 我很抱歉 Look, I'm sorry about yesterday. 别担心 显然其他人 也会犯相同的错误 Don't worry about it. Apparently, other people have made the same mistake. 那好 Oh. Okay. Phew. 那你觉得我是哪里像？ So, uh, what do you think it is about me? 我不知道 I don't know what. 你就是有种… You just have... - 特质 - 特质 对 太好了 - ...a quality. - A quality. Right. Great. 太可惜 因为你和罗威尔会是很棒的一对 It's a shame, because you and Lowell would've made a great couple. 罗威尔？金融服务部的罗威尔？你认为我适合跟他在一起？ Lowell? Financial Services Lowell? That's who you saw me with? 干嘛？他很可爱啊 What? He's cute. 是啊 Well, yeah. 他比出纳处的布莱恩好多了 He's no Brian in Payroll. 布莱恩是…？ Is Brian? 不 我不知道 重点是 如果你要撮合我跟某人… No. I don't know. The point is, if you were gonna set me up... 我会希望是像他那样的人 ...I'd like to think it'd be with somebody like him. 我认为你配不上布莱恩 Well, I think Brian's a little out of your league. 不好意思 你认为我追不到布莱恩？ Excuse me. You don't think I could get a Brian? 因为我绝对可以追到布莱恩 相信我 Because I could get a Brian. Believe you me. 我真的不是 I'm really not. 这一件？ This one? 不好 No. 我已经给你们看过所有洋装了 I've shown you every dress we have. 除非你们想让她穿着 柠檬黄色套装入土… Unless you want her to spend eternity in a lemon-yellow pantsuit... 不然就选酒红色 ...go with the burgundy. 不管我们选什么 她都不会满意 Whatever we pick, she would've told us it's the wrong one. 没错 就选酒红色 You're right. We'll go with the burgundy. 很棒的选择 我要出来了 A fine choice. I'm coming out. 等等 我们还需要鞋子 Wait. We need shoes. 好 Okay. Uh... 这些如何？ How about these? 那些是日鞋 That's really a day shoe. 她去的地方 别人的打扮会更隆重吗？ And where she's going, everyone else will be dressier? 能找鞋跟细一点的鞋吗？ Could we see something in a slimmer heel? 好 我找不到酒红色的晚鞋 Okay. I have nothing in an evening shoe in the burgundy. 不过有双银色的鞋或许适合 I can show you something in a silver that may work. 不行 一定要酒红色 No, it really should be burgundy. - 除非我们中包另一件洋装 - 对 - Unless we go with a different dress. - Yes. 不 不 不 我看看 No, no, no. Watch this. 等等 后面或许有适合的 Wait, I may have something in the back. 天啊 Oh, my God. 没事吧？ Is everything all right, dear? 没事 Yeah. Yeah. 只是奶奶的东西 Just Nana's stuff. 大家怎么样？都好了吗？ How we doing? You guys ready? 妈妈打电话给我 提醒我不要把头发绑起来 Mom called to remind me not to wear my hair up. 知道我的耳朵 不是我最漂亮的部位吗？ Did you know my ears were not my best feature? 有时候我会一直耿耿于怀 Some days it's all I can think about. 抱歉我迟到了 我找不到我的耳圈 Hi. I'm sorry I'm late. I couldn't find my bearings. 你是说耳环吗？ Heh. You mean your earrings? 我说了什么？ What did I say? - 就是这双鞋子吗？ - 对 巴洛从意大利寄过来的 - Are these the shoes? - Yes. Paolo sent them from Italy. 干嘛？我们这里 没有鞋子吗？ What? We, uh, don't have shoes here? 早安 准备好出发了吗？ Morning. We ready to go? 打扮后 我们看起来都很棒吧？ Don't we look nice all dressed up? 就是这类的评论吧？ It's stuff like that, isn't it? - 真的是很棒的仪式 - 的确 - It was a beautiful service. - It really was. 过来 亲爱的 Come here, sweetheart. 你知道… You know... 我认为该是你开始使用晚霜的时候了 ...I think it's time for you to start using night cream. 干嘛？ What? 没什么 只是你的大衣很吵 Nothing. Just your overcoat sounds remarkably like Brent Musburger. 你看看 巨人队对牛仔队 Check it out. Giants-Cowboys. 你在葬礼时看美式足球赛？ You're watching football at a funeral? 不 这只是赛前分析 待会在宴会上才要看 No, it's the pregame. I'm gonna watch it at the reception. 你这个人真是充满惊奇 You're a frightening, frightening man. 噢 不会吧 我的巴洛鞋 Oh, no. My new Paolo shoes. 希望鞋没坏 Oh. I hope they're not ruined. 天啊 真是美好的一天 God, what a great day. 干嘛？我是说天气 What? Weatherwise. 我知道 I know. 空气和树木 The air, the trees. 虽然奶奶走了 但是… Even though Nana's gone, there's something almost, uh, life... - 罗斯 你没事吧？ - 罗斯 - Ross, are you okay? - Ross! 我没事 I'm fine. No, I'm fine. 只是… Just... 我最大的梦魇终于成真 不过… ...having my worst fear realized, but... 不用担心 我只是看看 你是否肌肉痉挛 I'm just checking to see if the muscle's in spasm. - 唔 - 怎么了？ - Huh. - What? What is it? - 你少穿了一个皮带孔 - 呕 - You missed a belt loop. - Ugh. 好 有肌肉痉挛 Okay, it's in spasm. 来了 亲爱的 给你 Here, sweetie. Here. 我有高尔夫球意外时 都会吃这个 I took these when I had my golfing accident. 谢了 妈妈 Thanks, Mom. 不好意思 Sorry. 你好 我是安卓亚 Hi, I'm Andrea. 我是桃乐丝的女儿 I'm Dorothy's daughter. 你好 我是钱德 我不知道桃乐丝是谁 Hi, I'm Chandler, and I have no idea who Dorothy is. 嘿 看看是谁起来了 Hey, look who's up. - 嘿 - 你觉得如何？ - Hey. - How do you feel? 我觉得很棒 I feel great. 我觉得很棒… I feel great. I feel great. 哇 那些药丸真的有用 Wow, those pills really worked, huh? 前两颗还好 但后两颗真的… Yeah. Not the first two, but the second two, whew. 我好爱你们 I love you guys. 你们最棒了 我好爱我妹妹 You guys are the greatest. I love my sister. 我好爱菲比 I love Pheebs. Ha. - 真好 - 嘿 - That's so nice. - Hey. - 钱德 - 嘿 - Chandler. - Hey. 我好爱你 I love you, man. 听好 如果你想当同志 就好好当吧 And listen, if you wanna be gay, be gay. 我无所谓 It doesn't matter to me. 你没说错 You were right. 瑞秋… Rachel. Rachel, Rachel. 我最爱你了 I love you the most. 嗯 那你知道我最爱谁吗？ Well, you know who I love the most? - 不知道 - 是你 - No. - You. 噢 你没听懂 Oh, you don't get it. - 啊 - 那是什么？ - Aw! - What do you got there? 听力装置 Uh, just a, uh, hearing disability. 比数多少？ What's the score? 巨人队以17分对14分领先 第三节只剩三分钟 17-14, Giants. Three minutes to go in the third. 太好了 Beautiful. 菲比 你可以拿块饼干给我吗？ Pheebs, could you maybe hand me a cracker? 你奶奶一定不会喜欢的 Your grandmother would've hated this. 当然 这是她的葬礼 Well, sure. What with it being her funeral and all. 不 我会一直听到她说… No, I'd be hearing about... 为什么没有蜜糖火腿？ ...why didn't I get the honey-glazed ham? 或是我买的花不够 又或者是… Or I didn't spend enough on flowers. If I spent more, she'd say: 何必浪费那么多钱？我都死了 "Why waste your money? I don't need flowers, I'm dead." 听起来很像奶奶的口气 That sounds like Nana. 知道和批评你每句话的人... Do you know what it's like to grow up... 在一起生活是什么滋味吗？ ...with someone who is critical of every single thing you say? 我想象得到 I can imagine. 我告诉你 你的母亲 I tell you, it's a wonder your mother turned out... 变得这么乐观 积极的人真的很神奇 ...to be the positive, life-affirming person she is. 真的很神奇 That is a wonder. 妈妈 告诉我 如果可以重来… So tell me something, Mom. If you had to do it all over again... 如果此时此刻她在这里… ...I mean, if she was here right now... 你会告诉她吗？ ...would you tell her? 告诉她什么？ Tell her what? 她如何使你抓狂 挑剔每一件小事 How she drove you crazy, picking on every little detail. 譬如说你的头发 Like your hair, for example. 我不太懂你在说什么 I'm not sure I know what you're getting at. 如果你说出实话 情况会好一点吗？ Would things have been better if you'd just told her the truth? 不会 No. 我认为某些事 还是不要说比较好 I think some things are better left unsaid. 家和万事兴 I think it's nicer when people just get along. 哈 Ha. 再来些酒吗？ More wine, dear? 当然 Oh, I think so. 你戴这副耳环真好看 Those earrings look really lovely on you. 谢谢 Thank you. 是你的耳环 They're yours. 其实是奶奶的 Actually, they were Nana's. 不 No! 真叫人难过 Now I'm depressed. 比刚才还难过 Even more than I was. 这个裸体的小家伙是谁？ Hey, who's this little naked guy? 那个裸体的小家伙就是我 Uh, that little naked guy would be me. 看这小东西 Aw. Look at the little thing. 没关系 那是我的小弟弟 Yes, fine. That is my penis. 现在成熟一点行吗？ Can we be grownups now? - 这些人是谁？ - 考倒我了 - Who are those people? - Got me. - 中间那个是奶奶 - 哇 - That's Nana right there in the middle. - Wow. 我看看 Yeah, let's see. "我和大伙们摄于爪哇咖啡厅" "Me and the gang at Java Joe's." 摩妮卡 你长得好像你奶奶 Wow. Monica, you look just like your grandmother. 她那时候几岁？ How old was she there? 看一下 1939年 Let's see. "1939." 24 25岁吧 Uh, twenty-four, twenty-five. 看起来很好玩的一群人 Huh. It looks like a fun gang. 你们快看 有摩妮卡裸体的照片 Ooh, look, look, look. I got Monica naked. 我看看 Let me see. 不 那个还是我 No, no. That would be me again. 我在尝试新事物 I'm, uh, just trying something. - 嘿 罗威尔 - 嘿 钱德 - Hey, Lowell. - Oh, hey, Chandler. 金融服务处还好吗？ So how's it going in Financial Services? 简直是一团乱 It's like Mardi Gras without the papier-mâché heads. 你们呢？ How about you? 很好 听着… Good. Good. Listen, um, heh... 我不知道雪莉怎么跟你说我的事 但是… ...I don't know what Shelly told you about me, but, uh... 我并不是 ...I'm not. 我知道 我也是这样跟她说的 I know. That's what I told her. - 真的吗？ - 对 - Really? - Yeah. 你看得出来？ So you can tell? 大部分的时候是的 我们有种…雷达 Pretty much. Most of the time. We have a kind of radar. 所以你不认为我有… So you don't think I have... 那种特质？ ...a quality? 代表男同志发言 我得说没有 Speaking for my people, I'd have to say no. 对了 你的朋友 出纳处的布莱恩？他是同志 By the way, your friend Brian from Payroll? He is. - 他是？ - 对 - He is? - Yep. 而且你绝对配不上他 And way out of your league. 配不上他 Out of my league. 我可以追到布莱恩的 如果我愿意的话 I could get a Brian. If I wanted to get a Brian, I could get a Brian. 嘿 布莱恩 Hey, Brian. # Friends.S01E09.1994.BluRay.1080p.x265.10bit.MNHD-FRDS.txt 泰瑞 我知道我在这里还没做很久 Terry, I know I haven't worked here very long... 不过我在想可否先… ...but I was wondering, do you think it would be possible... 预先给我一百元的薪水？ ...if I got a $100 advance on my salary? 预先？ An advance? 我才能跟我家人一起过感恩节 It's so that I can spend Thanksgiving with my family. 我们每年都会去维尔滑雪场 我爸都会帮我买机票 See, every year, we go skiing in Vail, and normally my father pays for my ticket... 由于我已经开始要求独立… ...but I've sort of started this whole independent thing, you know... 也因此 我才会来做这个"工作" ...which is actually why I took this "job." 瑞秋 瑞秋 亲爱的 Rachel, Rachel, sweetheart. 你是个很糟 很糟 很糟的服务生 You're a terrible, terrible waitress. 真的 真的很糟糕 Really, really awful. 我知道你的意思了 我赞成你的观点 Okay, I hear what you're saying. I'm with you. 呃 Um... 可是我很努力 而且我觉得自己已经进步了 But I'm trying really hard, and I think I'm doing better. 是真的 I really do. 有人需要咖啡吗？ Does anybody need coffee? - 有 这边 - 我要 - Yeah, over here. - Yeah, I do. 你看看 Heh. Look at that. 抱歉 先生？嗨 你常常来 Excuse me, sir? Hi. You come in here all the time. - 嗯 - 我在想你是否可以 - Uh-huh. - I was just wondering... 有可能先预借给我一点小费？ ...you think there's a possibility you could give me an advance on my tips? 不要 Huh? No. 好 好 没关系的 抱歉曾经给你打翻过 Okay, okay. That's fine, fine. Sorry about that spill before. 只剩九十八块五毛钱了 Only 98.50 to go. - 嘿 - 嘿 - Hey. Hey. - Hey. 罗斯 你知道爸妈妈要去波多黎各过感恩节吗？ Ross, did you know that Mom and Dad are going to Puerto Rico for Thanksgiving? 什么？不 不会的 What? No, they're not. - 有 布莱曼家邀请他们去的 - 你搞错了 - Yes, they are. The Blymans invited them. - You're wrong. - 我没错 - 你搞错了 - I am not wrong. - You're wrong. 不 我才跟他们谈过 No, I just talked to them. 我要打给妈妈 I'm calling Mom. - 嘿 嘿 - 嘿 - Hey, hey. - Hey. - 嘿 - 咖啡 - Hey. - Coffee. 这是求救专线的发问 你脸上有化妆吗？ And this from the Cry for Help Department: Are you wearing makeup? 对 有 Yes, I am. 今天我已是正式的乔伊•崔比亚尼 演员兼模特儿 As of today, I am officially Joey Tribbiani, actor/model. 谢谢 Thank you. 太好玩了 我觉得你比较像乔伊•崔比亚尼 男人兼女人 That's funny, I was thinking you look more like Joey Tribbiani, man/woman. 你在当哪种模特儿？ What were you modeling for? 义诊的海报当平面模特儿 You know those posters for the City Free Clinic? 所以你要去扮演健康男人的角色？ Oh, wow. You're gonna be one of those healthy, healthy, healthy guys? - 啊 - 宣传气喘那个人真的很可爱 - Ah? - The asthma guy's really cute. - 对啊 - 可不是吗？ - Oh, he is. - Isn't he? - 知道你要当哪种宣传大使吗？ - 不知道 - You know which one you're gonna be? - No, no. 不过我听说莱姆病有缺人 所以呢… But I hear Lyme disease is open, so, you know... 祝你好运 希望你能得到 Good luck, man. I hope you get it. 谢了 Thanks. 你说对了 他们怎么可以这样？ Well, you were right. How can they do this to us, huh? 是感恩节耶 It's Thanksgiving. 这样子好了 我在我那边做晚餐好吗？ Aw. Tell you what. How about if I cook dinner at my place? 我会弄得很像妈妈煮的 I'll make it just like Mom's. 你会做有颗粒的洋芋泥吗？ Will you make the mashed potatoes with the lumps? 本来就不该有… You know they're not actually supposed to...? 我会设法弄些颗粒 I'll work on the lumps. - 乔伊 你要回家去对吧？ - 对 - Joey, you're going home, right? - Yeah. 钱德 你还在抵制所有清教徒相关的节日？ And I assume, Chandler, you're still boycotting all the Pilgrim holidays? 每一个都不放过 Yes, every single one of them. 菲比 你会跟你奶奶过？ Phoebe, you're gonna be with your grandma? 对 还有她男朋友 Yeah, and her boyfriend. 不过我们的感恩节是在十二月 因为他是过农历的 But we're celebrating Thanksgiving in December because he's lunar. 这么说你星期四有空了？ So you're free Thursday, then? - 对 哦 我也可以去吗？ - 可以 - Yeah. Oh, can I come? - Yeah. 瑞秋 你要去维尔滑雪？ Rach, you still thinking you're gonna make it to Vail? 那当然 Absolutely. Shoop, shoop, shoop. - 只差一百零二块钱 - 不是只剩九十八块五毛吗？ - Only $102 to go. - I thought it was 98.50. 对 嗯 是的 不过我打破了一个杯子 Yeah, well, it was, but I broke a cup. 嗯 我要去卡萝家了 Well, I'm off to Carol's. 我们何不也邀她来？ Ooh, ooh, why don't we invite her? 因为她是我前妻 Ooh, ooh, because she's my ex-wife... 她会想带着她的同性恋伴侣一起来 ...and will probably wanna bring her, ooh, ooh, lesbian life partner. 嗨 卡萝在家吗？ Hi. Is Carol here? - 不在 她去开会了 - 哦 - No, she's at a faculty meeting. - Oh. 我过来拿我的骷髅头 Well, I just came by to pick up my skull. 哦 不是我的 是… Well, not mine, but... - 请进 - 谢了 - Come in. - Thanks. 是卡萝借走的 我得把头还给博物馆 Yeah, Carol borrowed it for a class, and I have to get it back to the museum. 长什么样子？ What's it look like? 就像一张没有脸皮的大脸 Kind of like a big face without skin. 是 这种概念我很熟 Yes, heh, I'm familiar with the concept. - 我们可以找找看 - 好 - We can just look for it. - Okay. 哇 你们有很多 当女同性恋的书 Wow, you guys, heh, sure have a lot of books about being a lesbian. 嗯 就是得去上个课 Well, you know, you have to take a course. 不然他们就不让人当了 Otherwise they don't let you do it. 嘿 《乌龟耶尔特》 这很经典的 Hey, hey, Yertle the Turtle. A classic. 其实那本是我念给宝宝听的 Actually, I'm reading it to the baby. 还没生出来的宝宝？ The baby that hasn't been born yet? 这是否代表你… Uh, wouldn't that mean you're... 疯了？ ...crazy? 你不相信他们在里面听得到声音？ What, you don't think they can hear sounds in there? 你不是认真的吧？你真的跟胎儿说话？ You're not serious. I mean, you really talk to it? 对 常常 我要宝宝认得我的声音 Yeah, all the time. I want the baby to know my voice. 那你… 你有提到我吗？ Do you, uh...? Do you talk about me? - 有 常提 - 真的？ - Yeah, yeah. All the time. - Really? 不过 我们都是称你为 "捐精子的泡泡先生" But, um, we just refer to you as "Bobo the sperm guy." 如果她有对胎儿说话 我想我也要争取一点肚皮时间 Look, if she's talking to it, I just think I should get some belly time too. 并非我相信这一套 I mean, not that I believe any of this. 我信 我想宝宝可以听到所有的声音 Oh, I believe it. I think the baby can totally hear everything. - 真的？ - 我可以证明给你看 - Really? - I can show you. 也许有点怪 This will seem a little weird. 不过只要你把头放到这只火鸡里面 But you put your head inside this turkey... 然后我们大家都来说话 你就可以听到我们说的话 ...and then we'll all talk, and you'll hear everything we say. 我想表达 我对这项实验的支持 I'd just like to say I'm totally behind this experiment. 事实上 我很愿意为你的头抹油 In fact, I'd very much like to butter your head. - 嘿 - 瑞秋 - Hey. - Hey, Rach. - 你赚到钱了吗？ - 没 差远了 - Did you make your money? - No, not even close. 忘了维尔 忘了见我家人的事 Forget Vail. Forget seeing my family. 忘了… Forget shoop, shoop, shoop. 瑞秋 Uh, Rach... 你的信 ...here's your mail. 谢了 你可以放在桌上 Thanks. You can just put it on the table. 不要 Heh. No. 这是你的信 Here's your mail. 谢了 放在桌上就好 Thanks. You can just put it on the table. 你打开就对了 Would you just open it? 哦 我的天 Oh, my God. - 你们太棒了 - 哈哈 - Oh, you guys are great. - Aw. Ha, ha. - 啊 - 我们全都有捐 - Aw. - We all chipped in. - 有吗？ - 你欠我二十块 - We did? - You owe me 20 bucks. 谢谢 谢谢大家 Thank you. Thank you so much. 钱德 你的传统节日大餐准备好了 Chandler, here you go. Got your traditional holiday feast. 蕃茄汤 Got your tomato soup... 香烤起司配菜 还有家庭号的洋葱圈 ...your grilled-cheese fixings, and your family-size bag of Funyuns. 这是你的感恩节晚餐？ Wait, this is what you're having for Thanksgiving dinner? 你跟这个节日有什么仇？ What is it with you and this holiday? 当时我九岁 All right, I'm 9 years old. - 啊 - 我好恨这个故事 - Aw. - Aw, I hate this story. 我们才吃完丰富的感恩节大餐 We've just finished Thanksgiving dinner. 我嘴里… 我记得很清楚 还塞满南瓜派 I have... And I remember this part vividly. A mouthful of pumpkin pie. 然后我父母就告诉我 他们要离婚了 And this is the moment my parents choose to tell me they're getting divorced. 哦 我的天 Oh, my God. 一旦你尝过完全相反的滋味 就很难去享受感恩节大餐 It's very difficult to enjoy Thanksgiving dinner once you've seen it in reverse. 嗨 Hi. - 我们以前一起工作过 - 有吗？ - We used to work together. - We did? 对 在梅西百货的时候 你就是迷惑香水女孩 对吧？ Yeah, at Macy's. You're the Obsession girl, right? - 对 - 我就是 "雅男仕" 香水那个 - Yes. - I was the Aramis guy. - 雅男仕… - 哦 - Aramis? Aramis? Aramis? - Oh. 对 是你 Yeah, right. 我跟你说 你是香水这一行最棒的人 I gotta tell you, you're the best in the business. - 别开玩笑了 - 我说真的 - Get out. - I'm serious. 你很厉害 你就懂何时该喷 何时该往后退 You're amazing. You know when to spritz. You know when to lay back. 真的？你不晓得这话对我而言 多么有意义 Really? You don't know what that means to me. 嗯 Mm, mm. 你今夜闻起来真香 你身上的是什么？ You smell great tonight. Uh, what are you wearing? 我身上什么也没 Nothing. 听着 你要不要去喝一杯？ Listen, do you wanna go get a drink or something? 好 我非常愿… Yeah, that would be... - 怎么了？ - 突然想到我另外还有事 - What's wrong? - I just remembered I have to do something. 什么事？ Oh. What? 嗯… Um... 得离开了 Leave. 等一下… Whoa. Wait, wait, wait. 我猜大家全都看过了 So I guess you all saw it. - 什么？ - 看过什么？ - What? - Saw what? 不 我们只是在笑 你也知道 笑声是会传染的 No, we're just laughing. You know how laughter can be infectious. 嘿 Hey. 只好找另一个过节的地方了 整家人都以为我得了性病 Set another place for Thanksgiving. My entire family thinks I have VD. 今夜的特别节目 Tonight, on a very special Blossom. 看起来不错 好 Mm, looking good. Okay. 苹果汁在滚 火鸡在烤 山芋香喷喷… Cider's mulling, turkey's turking, yams are yamming. 干嘛？ What? 不晓得 I don't know. 反正妈妈不在厨房 感觉就不一样 It's just not the same without Mom in the kitchen. 够了 滚出去 别来烦我 Ugh. All right, that's it. Get out of my way and stop annoying me. 哦 这就有点像了 Well, that's closer. That's... 我买到机票了 I got the ticket, I got the ticket. 再过五小时 就可以… Five hours from now, shoop, shoop, shoop. 哦 你不能再咻下去了 Oh, you must stop shooping. 好 我要去收拾行李了 Okay, I'm gonna get my stuff. 钱德 你要进来吗？ Chandler, will you just come in, already? 不了 我宁可跟这些快乐的活动 保持安全距离 No, thank you. I prefer to keep a safe distance from all this merriment. 小心 南瓜派来了 Look out. Incoming pumpkin pie. 你以前来这一套我们都会笑 但这可不好笑 Okay, we all laughed when you did it with the stuffing, but that's not funny anymore. 摩妮卡 我有一个问题 我没看到薯球 Hey, Monica, I got a question. I don't see any Tater Tots. 这不叫问题 That's not a question. 我妈妈都会做 那是传统 But my mom always makes them. It's like a tradition. 一定要有一片火鸡肉 一点蔓越橘酱再加一颗薯球啊 You get a little piece of turkey on your fork, a little cranberry sauce, and a Tot. 我是说 由于我的疾病 害我不能跟家人相聚 I mean, it's bad enough I can't be with my family... 已经很惨了 ...because of my disease. 好 可以 All right, fine. 今晚的马铃薯有做成泥的 有颗粒 Tonight's potatoes will be both mashed with lumps... 还有做成薯球的 ...and in the form of Tots. 好耶 Yes. 好 我要去跟我未出世的孩子谈谈 All right, I'm off to talk to my unborn child. - 啊 - 好 妈妈就不会打人 - Ah. - Okay, Mom never hit. 好 全好了 Okay, all done. 菲比 你有把马铃薯打成…？ What? Phoebe, did you whip the pota...? 罗斯要留一些颗粒 Ross needs lumps. 哦 我很抱歉 我只有… Oh, I'm sorry. Oh, I just... 我还以为我们要弄成泥 然后再加进一些豆子和洋葱 I thought we could have them whipped and then add some peas and onions. 为什么要加？ Why would we do that? 因为我妈妈死前 Then they'd be just like my mom used to make it... 都是那样做的 ...you know, before she died. 好 给你们三种不同风味的马铃薯 Okay, three kinds of potatoes coming up. 好 再见了 大家 Okay. Goodbye, you guys. 谢谢大家 Thanks for everything. 哦 天 你们看… 对不起 很抱歉 Oh, God, look at... Sorry. I'm so sorry. 不可思议的事件发生了 超狗跑了 The most unbelievable thing has happened. Underdog has gotten away. - 气球超狗？ - 不 不 是真的卡通超狗 - The balloon? - No, no, the actual cartoon character. 当然是指气球 Of course the balloon. 新闻全都在报导 在它抵达梅西百货之前 It's all over the news. Before he reached Macy's... 它松脱了 被人发现 就要飘过华盛顿广场公园上空 ...he broke free and was spotted flying over Washington Square Park. - 我要到屋顶上去看 谁要跟我去？ - 我不行 我得走了 - I'm going to the roof. Who's with me? - Well, I can't. I gotta go. 一只八十英尺的大狗飘过城市？ An 80-foot inflatable dog loose over the city? - 这种事能有几回？ - 几乎没机会 - How often does that happen? - Almost never. - 钥匙拿了吗？ - 好吧 - Got the keys? - Okay. 随时可以开始 Any time you're ready. 好 Okay. 好 开始了 Okay, here we go. 噢… Oh... 好 我要对着哪里说？我的意思是… Okay, where am I talking to here? I mean, uh... 有个管道似乎是有听觉上的优势 不过呢… Well, there is one way that seems to offer a certain acoustical advantage, but... 对着隆起的部位就可以了 Just aim for the bump. 好 Okay. 好 好 Okay, okay. 好 开始 Okay, here goes. 你知道吗？我没办法 You know, I... You know, I can't do this. 这太… 太诡异了 我觉得很蠢 This is... It's too weird. I feel stupid. 没关系的 那就不要做 All right, so don't do it. It's fine. 别因为苏珊这么做 你就非得也来一下 You don't have to do it just because Susan does it. 哈罗 宝宝 哈罗 哈罗 Hello, baby. Hello, hello. 我们眼看着超狗的影子往公园坠的那种感觉 That moment when we first saw the giant dog shadow fall over the park? 他们干嘛非得把它打下来？真的很残酷 But did they have to shoot him down? I mean, that was just mean. 现在火鸡应该是外脆… Okay, right about now the turkey should be crispy on the outside... 内多汁了 ...and juicy on the inside. 我们干嘛还站在这里？ Why are we standing here? 我们在等你开门 你有拿钥匙 We're waiting for you to open the door. You've got the keys. 不 我没有 No, I don't. 有 你有 我们要出门时 你说 "钥匙拿了" Yes, you do. When we left, you said, "Got the keys." 不 我没有 我是问 "钥匙拿了吗？" No, I didn't. I asked, "Got the keys?" 不 不 不 你是说 "钥匙拿了" No, no, no. You said, "Got the keys." 你们谁有钥匙吗？ Either of you have the keys? - 炉子还开着 - 我得拿我的机票 - The oven is on. - Oh, I've gotta get my ticket. - 等一下 我们有你们的备用钥匙 - 快去拿 - Wait. We have a copy of your key. - Well, then get it, get it! 这种口气也不能让我快一点 Hey, hey. That tone won't make me go any faster. - 乔伊 - 这倒可以 - Joey. - That one will. 大家都对我说 And everyone's telling me: "你得挑一门主修的" "You gotta pick a major. You gotta pick a major." 所以我就鼓起勇气 选了古生物学 So on a dare, I picked paleontology. 你根本不晓得我在说什么 面对现实吧 你只是一个胎儿 And you have no idea what I'm saying, because, let's face it, you're a fetus. 你只会很开心 你没有腮了 You're just happy you don't have gills anymore. 你不用一直对他说话 你可以用唱的… Look, you don't have to talk to it. You can sing to it. 拜托 我才不要对着你的肚子唱歌 可以吗？ Oh, please. I am not singing to your stomach, okay? - 还顺利吗？ - 嘘… - How's it going? - Shh, shh, shh. # 我们来了 # # Here we come # # 穿过街道 # # Walkin' down the street # # 看人们有趣的样子 # # Get the funniest looks from Everyone we meet # 嘿… Hey, hey... - 嘿 你有感觉到吗？ - 有 - Hey, uh, did you just feel that? - I did. - 一直都有…？ - 不 这是第一次 - Well, does it always, uh...? - No, no, that was the first. - 继续唱 继续唱 - 哦 - Keep singing. Keep singing. - Oh. 嘿 嘿 你是我的宝宝 Hey, hey, you're my baby 我等不及要见到你 And I can't wait to meet you 等你出来了 我要给你买个贝果 然后再一起去动物园 When you come out I'll buy you a bagel And then we'll go to the zoo 这次我有感觉到 I felt it that time. 嘿 嘿 我是你的爹地 Hey, hey, I'm your daddy 我是那个没有胸部的爹地 I'm the one without any breasts - 不是那支 - 你们可以快一点吗？ - Nope, not that one. - Can you go any faster with that? 只有一个钥匙洞 却有一大堆钥匙 Hey, I got one keyhole and about a zillion keys. 你自己想想 You do the math. 你们干嘛保存一大堆钥匙？ Why do you guys have so many keys in there anyway? 就是为了应付这类紧急状况 For an emergency just like this. 听着 你这嘻皮笑脸的 All right, listen, smirky. 要不是因为你的笨气球 If it wasn't for your stupid balloon... 我早就上飞机 看着一个女人这样做了 ...I would be on a plane, watching a woman do this right now. 可是我没有 But I'm not. 你说你有钥匙的 I swear you said you had the keys. 不 我没有 我没钥匙就不会说我有 No. I wouldn't say I had the keys unless I had the keys. 我显然没有钥匙 And I obviously did not have the keys. 够了 不要再说钥匙了 统统不准说钥匙 Okay, all right, that's it. Enough with the keys. No one say "keys." 我怎么可能会有钥匙？ Why would I have the keys? 因为你说你有 Aside from the fact that you said you did? - 我没说 - 你应该有 - But I didn't. - Well, you should have. - 为什么？ - 因为… - Why? - Because. 为什么？因为一切都是我的责任吗？ Why? Because everything is my responsibility? 我都负责煮晚饭了还不够？ Isn't it enough that I'm making Thanksgiving dinner? 大家都要不一样的马铃薯 所以我就全做了 Everyone wants a different kind of potato, so I'm making different kinds of potatoes. 可是有谁在乎我要哪种马铃薯？ You know, does anybody care what kind of potatoes I want? 没有 没有 没有 No, no, no! 只要菲比有她的豆子跟洋葱 You know, just as long as Phoebe gets her peas and onions... 马利欧先生有薯球… ...and Mario gets his Tots. 这是我的第一个感恩节晚餐 我… It's my first Thanksgiving, and I... 全都搞砸了 我没能… It's all burnt, and I can't... 摩妮卡 现在只有狗听懂你的话 Okay, Monica, only dogs can hear you now, so... 你看 门开了 我们进去了 Look, the door's open. Here we go. 不… Oh, God. - 噢 - 哦 - Ooh. - Oh. 哦 火鸡烤焦了 Well, the turkey's burnt. 马铃薯毁了 马铃薯毁了 马铃薯毁了 Potatoes are ruined. Potatoes are ruined. Potatoes are ruined. # 我们来了 # # Here we come # # 穿过… # # Walkin' down the... # 这味道不像妈妈的厨房 This doesn't smell like Mom's. 是不像 对吧？你要有颗粒的？ No, it doesn't, does it? But you wanted lumps, Ross? 给你 兄弟 这就是你的颗粒 Well, here you go, buddy. You got one. 天 这下可好 Oh, God, this is great. 飞机跑了 我想我只好跟你们留在这里了 The plane is gone, so I guess I'm stuck here with you guys. 嘿 我们都有较好的计划 这又不是大家的首选 Hey, we all had better plans, okay? This was nobody's first choice. 哦 真的吗？ Oh, really? 那我干嘛忙得要死 So why was I busting my ass... 想弄出一顿美味的大餐？ ...to make this delicious Thanksgiving dinner?! - 这叫美味吗？ - 给我闭嘴 - You call that delicious? - You be quiet! 别吵了 别吵了 别吵了 All right, stop it, stop it, stop it! 这样子感觉才像感恩节 Now, this feels like Thanksgiving. - 呃 - 干嘛？ - Ew. - What? 丑陋的裸男 从烤箱里把他的火鸡拿出来了 Ugly Naked Guy's taking his turkey out of the oven. 呃 Eh. 哦 我的天 他有人陪 Oh, my God. He's not alone. 丑陋的裸男… Ugly Naked Guy... 跟丑陋的裸女 共享感恩大餐 ...is having Thanksgiving dinner with Ugly Naked Gal. 这我得瞧瞧 I gotta see this. 哇 Aw. 丑陋的裸男 好家伙 All right, Ugly Naked Guy. 丑陋的裸舞 Ooh, ugly naked dancing. 他有伴真的很好 It's nice that he has someone. 我可以开始切了吗？ Shall I carve? 请便 By all means. 好 All right. 谁要白起司 谁要黑起司的？ Okay, who wants light cheese and who wants dark cheese? 我根本不想问什么叫黑起司 I don't even wanna know about the dark cheese. - 有人要分吃这块吗？ - 我要 - Does anybody wanna split this with me? - Ooh, I will. 你们得许愿才行 Mm. You guys have to make a wish. - 许愿？ - 得了 你们是知道的 就感恩节啊 - Make a wish? - Come on, you know, Thanksgiving. 你抢到比较大块的 你刚才许什么愿？ Ooh. You got the bigger half. What did you wish for? 就… 要比较大块的 The bigger half. 好 我想举杯庆祝 All right, I'd like to propose a toast. - 举杯了 - 嗯 - A little toast here. Ding, ding, ding. - Mm. 我知道这也许不是你们大家想要的感恩节 This isn't exactly the kind of Thanksgiving you planned... 可是对我来说 今天的感恩节真的很棒 ...but for me this has been really great, you know? 我想这是因为今天没有人离婚 I think because it didn't involve divorce... 也没有人大吐特吐 ...or projectile vomiting. 如果你去维尔滑雪 I was just thinking, if you'd gone to Vail... 或你们去跟家人相聚 或者要不是你得到… ...or if you guys had been with your family, or if you didn't have... 梅毒或什么的 ...syphilis and stuff... 我们就不可能在此相聚 ...we wouldn't be all together, you know? 我想我真正想说的是… So I guess what I'm trying to say... 我很感恩 你们大家的感恩节全毁了 ...is that I'm very thankful that all of your Thanksgivings sucked. 太感人了 That's so sweet. 谢谢 Thank you. 唔 Mm. 也预祝圣诞节很糟 And hey, here's to a lousy Christmas. 以及更糟的新年佳节 And a crappy New Year. 干杯 干杯 Hear, hear. # Friends.S01E10.1994.BluRay.1080p.x265.10bit.MNHD-FRDS.txt 各位 我希望你们见见一个人 Guys? There's, uh, somebody I'd like you to meet. 等等 那是什么？ Wait, wait. What is that? 这是马塞尔 要打声招呼吗？ That would be Marcel. You wanna say hi? 我不要 No. No, I don't. 他好珍贵喔 你从哪里找到他的？ Oh, he is precious. Where did you get him? 我朋友贝瑟把他从实验室救出来的 My friend Bethel rescued him from some lab. 好残忍喔 That is so cruel. 为什么会有父母亲把孩子命名为贝瑟？ Why? Why would a parent name their child Bethel? 那猴子的屁股上长了个罗斯 Hey, that monkey's got a Ross on his ass. 罗斯 他要跟你住在你的公寓吗？ Ross, is he gonna live with you, like, in your apartment? 对 卡萝离开后 家里冷冷清清的 Yeah. I mean, it's been kind of quiet since Carol left, so... 为什么不找个室友就好了？ Why don't you just get a roommate? 我不知道 我觉得到了某种年纪… Ah, I don't know. You reach a certain age... 跟室友住有点可悲 ...having a roommate is just kind of pathe... 抱歉 我的意思是说 是很酷的生活方式 Uh, sorry, that's "pathet," which is Sanskrit for "really cool way to live." 各位 我今晚唱的 都是新写的歌 You guys, I'm doing all-new material tonight. 有十二首有关我母亲自杀的新歌 I have 12 new songs about my mother's suicide... 一首讲的是雪人 ...and one about a snowman. 你最好用雪人那首开场 Might want to open with the snowman. - 嘿 乔伊 - 嘿 - Hey, Joey. - Hey. - 嘿 乔 - 结果怎么样？ - Hey, Joe. - So how'd it go? 我没拿到工作 Ah, I didn't get the job. 怎么可能？你是去年的圣诞老公公耶 How could you not get it? You were Santa last year. 我不知道 某个胖子跟店经理上床 I don't know. Some fat guy's sleeping with the store manager. 他根本无法逗人开心 这就是政治 He's not even jolly. It's all political. 那你要当什么？ So, what are you gonna be? 我会当他的助手之一 I'm gonna be one of his helpers. 这真是个耻辱 It's just such a slap in the face, you know? 你们都知道新年要做什么了吗？ Do you guys know what you're doing for New Year's? 干嘛？新年有什么问题吗？ Gee, what? What is wrong with New Year's? 你是没有 你有巴洛 Nothing for you. You have Paolo. 你不用面对那可怕的节庆压力… You don't have to face the horrible pressures of this holiday... 亟需寻找有嘴唇的生物… ...desperate scramble to find anything with lips... 在球落下的那一刻 有个可以亲嘴的对象 我真大声 ...just so can have somebody to kiss when the ball drops. Man, I'm talking loud. 告诉你 巴洛新年时 人会在罗马 Well, for your information, Paolo's gonna be in Rome this New Year's. 我会跟你们一样可悲 So I'll be just as pathetic as the rest of you. 你想得美 Yeah, you wish. 我受够了这个节日的疲劳轰炸 It's just that I'm sick of being a victim of this Dick Clark holiday. 我提议今年不要找伴 大家作个约定 I say this year, no dates, we make a pact. 就我们六个人 一起吃晚餐 Just the six of us. Dinner. - 好啊 - 好 - Sure. - Fine. 我希望大家的反应 能热烈一点 You know, I was hoping for a little more enthusiasm. - 哇哦 - 好 - Woo! - Okay. - 菲比 轮到你了 - 好 - Phoebe, you're on. - Oh. Oh, good. 各位 因应观众热烈的要求… Okay, hi. Ladies and gentlemen, back by popular demand... 请大家欢迎菲比•布非 ...Miss Phoebe Buffay. 谢谢大家 Thanks. Hi. 一开始我想先唱首 在这个佳节对我意义重大的歌曲 Um, ahem, I want to start with a song that means a lot to me this time of year. 我做了一个人 眼睛是煤炭做的 I made a man with eyes of coal 他有谜一样般的微笑 And a smile so bewitchin' 我要怎么知道 How was I supposed to know 我母亲死在厨房的事实？ That my mom was dead in the kitchen? 啦… La-la-la 我母亲的骨灰 My mother's ashes 甚至是她的睫毛 Even her eyelashes 安放在一个黄色的小坛子 Are resting in a little yellow jar - 有时天寒地冻 - 我是老实说 - And sometimes when it's freezing - I'm being honest here. 你不同意 You don't agree. - 我有点想打喷嚏 - 你说得没错 - I feel a little sneezy - You're right. 现在我… 不好意思… And now I... Excuse me? Excuse me? 吵闹的男士 Yeah, noisy boys. 你们有事情想跟大家分享吗？ Is it something that you'd like to share with the group? 没有 没事 No. No, that's okay. 你们有事情如此重要 非得在我弹奏时讨论… Come on, if it's important enough to discuss while I'm playing... 那就应该是重要到 值得与大家分享 ...then I assume it's important enough for everyone else to hear. 那家伙回家后一定会记得这教训 That guy's going home with a note. - 没事 我只是说… - 可以请你大声点吗？ - Nothing. I was just saying... - Could you speak up? 抱歉 Sorry. 我只是在跟我朋友说 你是我见过最美丽的女人 I was just saying to my friend, you were the most beautiful woman I'd ever seen. - 你说黛瑞•汉娜… - 黛瑞•汉娜 - And you said Daryl Hannah... - Darryl Hannah. 是他看过最美丽的女性 ...was the most beautiful woman that he'd ever seen in his life. 我说我喜欢她在《美人鱼》的演出 《华尔街》就还好 And I said, yeah, I liked her in Splash, but not so much in Wall Street. - 她有种强硬气质 - 强硬特质 - I thought she had a hard quality. - A hard quality. 黛瑞•汉娜是传统的美… And, uh, while Daryl Hannah is beautiful in a conventional way... 你则是散发出高雅的气质 ...you are, uh, luminous with a kind of delicate grace. 然后你就开始大吼了 Then that's when you started yelling. 好 我们休息片刻 Okay, we're gonna take a short break. 那家伙带回家的 应该不只是教训而已 I think that guy's going home with more than a note. 过来 马塞尔 坐着 Come here, Marcel. Sit here. 菲比 我不敢相信 他还没亲你 Pheebs, I can't believe he hasn't kissed you yet. 我跟巴洛约会六次后… I mean, God, by my sixth date with Paolo... 他已经替我的胸部取小名了 ...I mean, he had already named both my breasts. 我是不是说太多了？ Ooh, did I just share too much? 一点点啦 Just a smidge. 大卫是个科学家 做事一丝不苟 David's, like, you know, a scientist guy. He's very methodical. - 我觉得很浪漫 - 我也这么觉得 - I think it's romantic. - Me too. Oh! 你们有没有看过《军官与绅士》？ Did you ever see An Officer and a Gentleman? 有 Yeah. 他就像陪我去看那部电影的男生 Well, he's kind of like the guy I went to see that with. 除了… Except... 他更聪明 温柔而且贴心 Except he's smarter and gentler and sweeter. 我只想一直和他在一起 I just... I just want to be with him all the time. 日以继夜 夜以继日 You know, day and night. And night and day. 特殊节日也是 And special occasions. 等等 我懂了 你要邀他共度新年 Wait a minute. I see where this is going. You're gonna ask him to New Year's. 你要毁约 抛弃我们 You're gonna break the pact. She's gonna break the pact. 没有… No, no, no. 有啦 我可以吗… ？ Yeah, could I just? - 可以 因为我已经邀了珍妮丝 - 什么？ - Yeah, because I already asked Janice. - You what? 别这样 这是你订的约定耶 Come on, this was a pact. This was your pact. 我耐不住 我毁约了 I snapped, okay? I couldn't handle the pressure and I snapped. 可是珍妮丝？你们的分手糟透了 Yeah, but Janice? That was, like, the worst breakup in history. 我不是说这是好主意 我只是毁约了 I'm not saying it was a good idea. I'm saying I snapped. 不好意思我迟到了 Hi. Hi, sorry I'm late. 太多笑话了 Too many jokes. 一定要取笑乔伊 Must mock Joey. 很棒的鞋子吧？ Nice shoes, huh? 我快笑死了 Aah, you're killing me. 罗斯 他又在玩我的锅铲了 Ross. He's playing with my spatulas again. 他不会伤害它们 不是吗？ Look, he's not gonna hurt them, right? 你一定要把他带来这里吗？ Do you always have to bring him here? 我不想把他单独留在家 Look, I didn't want to leave him alone, all right? 我们今早吵了第一次架 We had our first fight this morning. 我觉得是因为我加班的关系 我说了不该说的话 I think it has to do with my working late. I said some things that I didn't mean. 他就朝我扔一坨屎 He threw some feces. 如果你加班 我可以替你照顾他 You know, if you're gonna work late, I can look in on him for you. 太好了 好… Oh, that would be great. Okay. 如果你去 一定要假装 你是去找他 But if you do, make sure it seems like you're there to see him, okay? 而不是帮我忙 And you're not, like, doing it as a favor to me. 好 但是他如果问 我就要直话直说了 Okay. But if he asks, I'm not going to lie. 但我们仍无法测试这个理论 But you can't actually test this theory. 因为现今粒子加速器的速度… Because today's particle accelerators are nowhere near powerful enough... 仍无法模拟出这样的情况 ...to simulate these conditions. - 好 那我有个问题 - 请说 - Okay. All right. I have a question then. - Yeah. 你有打算要亲我吗？ Were you planning on kissing me ever? 非常合理的问题… Uh, that's definitely a valid question... 答案是… ...and, uh, the answer... 有 ...would be yes. 我有这个打算 Yes, I was. 但我要这非凡的吻… But see, I wanted it to be this phenomenal kiss... 发生在非凡的时刻 因为是要亲你 ...that happened at this phenomenal moment because, well, it's you. 当然 Sure. Yeah. 对 但是我等得愈久 这个亲吻得更加非凡 Right. But, see, the longer I waited, the more phenomenal the kiss had to be. 现在 已经变成… And now, we've reached a place... 我得… ...where it's just got to be one of those things where I... 把桌子的东西都扫光 把你丢上去 ...sweep everything off the table and throw you down on it. 而我并不是那样的人 And I'm not really a sweeping sort of fella. 大卫 我认为你正是那样的人 Oh, David, I think you are a sweeping sort of fella. 只是你困在物理学家的体内罢了 I mean, you're a sweeper trapped inside a physicist's body. - 是吗？ - 没错 我很肯定 - Really. - Oh, yeah. I'm sure of it. 就来吧 扫掉一切 把我丢上去 You should just do it. Just sweep and throw me. Heh. - 现在做吗？ - 就是现在… - Now? Now? - Right now. Just... 好… Okay. Okay, okay. 嗯 这个很贵 You know what? This is just really expensive. 好 这个是礼物 Okay. And I'll tell you, this was a gift. - 你现在比较像在打扫 - 好吧 管他的 - So now you're just kind of tidying up. - Okay, what the hell? What the hell? - 你要我把你丢上去还是你自己跳？ - 我可以跳 - You want me to actually throw you...? - I can hop. 告诉我 "没有约会的约定" 对你们的意义如何？ Now, tell me something, what does the phase "no-date pact" mean to you? 我真的很抱歉 好吗？ Look, I'm sorry, okay? 只是钱德约了人 菲比也约了人 It's just that Chandler has somebody and Phoebe has somebody. 我就想说问问好笑巴比 I thought I'd ask Fun Bobby. - 你的前男友 好笑巴比？ - 对 - Fun Bobby, your ex-boyfriend, Fun Bobby? - Yeah. 你还知道第二个好笑巴比吗？ You know more than one Fun Bobby? 我刚好还认识一个好笑巴伯 I happen to know a Fun Bob. 好了 Okay. Here we go. 没有空间加牛奶了 Whoa, whoa, whoa. There's no room for milk. 好了 现在有了 There. Now there is. 好 在没有约会的夜晚… Okay, so on our no-date evening... 三个人都有约会了 ...three of you now are gonna have dates. - 四个 - 四个 - Uh, four. - Four. - 五个 - 五个 - Five. - Five. 抱歉 巴洛要搭早一点的班机回来 Sorry. Paolo's catching an earlier flight. 我在店里遇见一位很辣的单亲妈妈 Yeah, and I met this really hot single mom at the store. Ha, ha. 不然小精灵还能做什么？ What's an elf to do? 所以球落下的时候… Okay, so I'm gonna be the only one standing there alone... 只有我会孤单一人？ ...when the ball drops? 别这样 我们会办个大派对 没有人会知道谁的伴是谁 Oh, come on. We'll have a big party, and no one will know who's with who. 我现在真的不需要应付这些 Hey, you know, this is so not what I needed now. - 怎么了？ - 噢 是马塞尔 - What's the matter? - Oh, it's Marcel. 他一直拒我于门外 He keeps shutting me out, you know? 老是拖着双手 走来走去 He's walking around all the time, dragging his hands. 太奇怪了 我前几晚 跟他玩得很开心 That's so weird. I had such a blast with him the other night. - 是吗？ - 是啊 我们一起玩 还看电视 - Really? - Yeah, we played. We watched TV. 杂耍那部分实在太棒了 That juggling thing is amazing. 什么… ？ What, uh? 什么杂耍？ What juggling thing? 拿袜子当球耍啊 我以为是你教的 With the balled-up socks? I figured you taught him that. 不是 No. 其实没什么大不了的 只是袜子球而已 You know, it wasn't that big a deal. I mean, just balled-up socks. 和一颗香瓜 And a melon. - 菲比 你好 - 嗨 麦克斯 你认识大家了吗？ - Phoebe. Hi. - Hi, Max. Do you know everybody? 不认识 你有看到大卫吗？ No. Have you seen David? 没有 他不在 No, he hasn't been around. 如果看到他 叫他打包 我们要去明斯克了 Well, if you see him, tell him to pack his bags. We are going to Minsk. - 明斯克？ - 明斯克在俄罗斯 - Minsk? - Minsk. It's in Russia. 我知道明斯克在哪里 I know where Minsk is. 我们拿到赞助金 Ha, ha. We got the grant. 全额赞助我们三年 Three years, all expenses paid. 你们什么时候走？ So when do you leave? 一月一号 January 1 st. 哈罗？ Hello? - 嘿 嗨 - 嗨 - Hey. Hi. Hi. - Hi. - 你怎么来了？ - 麦克斯跟我说了明斯克的事 - What are you doing here? - Um, well, Max told me about Minsk. 我是来恭喜你的 实在太令人兴奋了 So you know, congratulations. This is so exciting! 是啊 Yeah. 如果我们要去 就更兴奋了 It'd be even more exciting, if we were going. 你不去吗？为什么啊？ Oh, you're not going? Oh, why? 跟她说啊 大卫 Tell her, David. "我不想去明斯克 和李波森 山口及法兰克工作" "I don't want to go to Minsk to work with Lipson and Yamaguchi and Flank. "不 我想留在这里 和我的女友亲热" No, no, no. I want to stay here and make out with my girlfriend." 好 谢谢你 麦克斯 Okay, thank you, Max. Thank you. 那你真的不去吗？ So you're really not going? 我不知道 我不知道怎么办… I don't know. I don't know what I'm gonna do. I just... 由你决定 You decide. - 别这样 - 拜托 - Oh, don't do that. - Please? 我在问你 我无法做决定 No, but I'm asking you. I can't make a decision. - 我无法 拜托你… - 好 留下来 - I can't. Please, just... - Okay. Stay. - 留下来 - 留下来 - Stay. - Stay. 你愈来愈厉害了 Getting so good at that. 都是麦克斯的东西 It was Max's stuff. 我好爱这个朝鲜蓟喔 I love this artichoke thing. 不要告诉我里面有什么 我明天才开始节食 Oh, don't tell me what's in it. The diet starts tomorrow. 你还记得珍妮丝吧？ You remember Janice. 历历在目 Vividly. - 嗨 - 嗨 我是珊蒂 - Hi. - Hi, I'm Sandy. 珊蒂 嗨 进来吧 Sandy, hi. Come on in. Hey. 哈 哈 Ha, ha. - 你把孩子带来了 - 对 可以吧？ - You brought your kids. - Yeah. That's okay, right? 派对 Party. 那个东西不能进来 That thing is not coming in here. "那个东西"？你是这样接待客人的吗？ "That thing"? This is how you greet guests at a party? 我问问你 如果我是和我的新女友来… Let me ask you something. If I showed up with my new girlfriend... 她在这里也会不受欢迎吗？ ...she wouldn't be welcome? 可是你的新女友 不会在我的茶几洒尿 I'm thinking your new girlfriend wouldn't urinate on my coffee table. 这件事情 他比任何人都感到丢脸 He was more embarrassed about that than anyone. 好吗？他有这样的勇气 回到这里… Okay? And for him to have the courage to walk back in here... 假装没事发生过… ...like nothing happened... 好吧 不要让他靠近我就对了 All right. All right. Just keep him away from me. 谢了 来吧 马塞尔 Thank you. Come on, Marcel. 我们和大家交际一下吧 What do you say you and I do a little mingling? 那好 我们之后再见 All right, I'll, uh, catch up with you later. 天啊 瑞秋… Oh, my gosh. Rachel, honey... 你还好吧？巴洛人呢？ ...are you okay? Where's Paolo? 在罗马 这混帐错过班机 Rome. Jerk missed his flight. 然后你的脸就爆炸了？ And then your face exploded? 不是 好吧 No. Okay. 我在机场准备上计程车… I was at the airport getting into a cab... 有个女人… ...when this woman... 带着笔记本的金发女人… ...this blond planet with a pocketbook... 开始对我大吼 ...starts yelling at me. 说是她先叫到计程车的 Something about how it was her cab first. 我还没意识过来 她就开始扯我的头发 And the next thing I know, she just starts pulling me out by my hair. 我开始吹我的口哨… And I started blowing my attack whistle thingy... 又有三台计程车出现 ...and then three more cabs show up. 我要进去计程车时 她又展开攻击 So as I'm going to get into a cab, she tackles me. 我的头撞到路边 嘴唇被哨子割伤 And I hit my head on the curb and cut my lip on my whistle. 大家在派对 都玩得愉快吗？ Oh! Everybody having fun at the party? 有人吃我做的沾酱吗？ Are people eating my dip? 我上个礼拜 在店里看到你时… You know, when I saw you at the store last week... 大概是我第一次 在心里脱掉小精灵的衣服 ...it was probably the first time I ever mentally undressed an elf. 哇 真淫荡 Wow, that's, uh, dirty. - 哈哈 - 对 - Ha, ha. - Yeah. 嘿 孩子们 Hey, kids. 看看他 我不要求他整晚陪我 Look at him. I'm not saying he has to spend the whole evening with me... 但至少关心我一下 ...but at least check in. 你在这里啊 There you are. 你从我身边跑掉了 You got away from me. 但被你找到了 But you found me. 罗斯 帮我们照张相 Here, Ross, take our picture. 笑一个 珍妮丝的相机要照了 Smile. You're on Janice Camera. 现在就杀了我 Kill me. Kill me now. Ha, ha. 各位 好笑巴比来了 Everybody, it's Fun Bobby! 好笑巴比 Fun Bobby! 嘿 巴比 Hey, Bobby. 嘿 不好意思我迟到了 但是我祖父… Hey, sorry I'm late. But my, uh, grandfather... 他两个小时前过世了 ...died about two hours ago. 明天才有飞机 所以… But I couldn't get a flight out till tomorrow, so... 我就来了 ...here I am. 嘿 好笑巴比 你好吗？ Hey, Fun Bobby. How's it going, man? 喔 是谁家死人了啊？ Whoa. Who died? 会开棺 It's going to be an open casket, you know? 所以我至少能再看他最后一面 So at least I'll get to see him again. 我要把照片放大 标题写 "破镜重圆" I'm gonna blow this one up and I'm gonna write "Reunited" in glitter. 好了 珍妮丝 够了 All right, Janice, that's it! 珍妮丝？珍妮丝？ Janice? Janice? Ahem. 嘿 珍妮丝？ Hey, Janice? 我邀你来这个派对时 我并不是想要… When I invited you to this party, I didn't think it meant that we... 噢 不会吧 Oh, no. - 很抱歉让你误会了 - 天哪 - I'm sorry you misunderstood. - Oh, my God. 你给我听好 钱德 You listen to me, Chandler. You listen to me. 总有一次 你将永远失去我 One of these times, it's just gonna be your last chance with me. 东西拿来啦 Oh, will you give me the thing? - 嗨 麦克斯 - 小野洋子 - Hi, Max. - Yoko. 我决定自己去明斯克 I've decided to go to Minsk without you. 哇 Wow. 少了你一切都会不同… It won't be the same... 但至少明斯克不会变 ...but it will still be Minsk. 新年快乐 Happy New Year. 你还好吧？ Are you all right? 我没事 Yeah, I'm fine. I'm fine. 你要去明斯克 You're going to Minsk. 不 我不要去明斯克 No, I'm not going to Minsk. 你一定要去 Oh, you are so going to Minsk. 你属于明斯克 不能为了我留在这里 You belong in Minsk. You can't stay here just because of me. 我可以 如果去 我就得和你分手 Yes, I can. Because if I go, it means I have to break up with you. - 我无法和你分手 - 你可以的 - And I can't break up with you. - Oh, yes. Yes, you can. 你只要说 "菲比 我爱你 但工作就是我的生命" Just say, uh, "Phoebe, I love you, but my work is my life. "我现在只能这么做" And that's what I have to do right now." 我会说 "你的工作？你怎么能那么说？" And I say, "Your work? Your work? How can you say that?" 你再说 "我的心都碎了… " And then you say, um, "It's tearing me apart... "但我别无选择 你能谅解吗？" ...but I have no choice. Can't you understand that?" 我会说 "不 我无法谅解" And I say, "No. No. I can't understand that." - 噢 - 抱歉 - Uh, ow. - Sorry. Um... 然后你再抱住我… And then you put your arms around me... - 你抱住我 - 抱歉 - And then you put your arms around me. - Oh, oh. Sorry. 你再说你爱我 永远不会忘记我 And, um... And then you tell me you love me and you'll never forget me. 我永远都不会忘记你 I'll never forget you. 然后说已经午夜了 你得走了… And then you say that it's almost midnight and you have to go... 因为你不想开启一个 无法和我一起结束的新年 ...because you don't want to start the new year with me if you can't finish it. 我会想你的… I'm gonna miss you... 你这科学小子 ...you scientist guy. 我们在时代广场实况报导 Hi, this is Dick Clark live in Times Square. 时代广场的五彩纸片 纷纷飘下 We're in a virtual snowstorm of confetti here in Times Square. 一年比一年盛大 It gets bigger and better every year. 好了 孩子们 Here you go, kids. 然后孔雀就咬了我 And then the peacock bit me. Ha, ha. 请你在午夜时亲我 Please kiss me at midnight. - 你有看到珊蒂吗？ - 我不知道怎么说… - You seen Sandy? - Ooh. I don't know how to tell you this... 她和麦克斯 在摩妮卡的卧房亲热 ...but, uh, she's in Monica's bedroom getting it on with Max, that scientist geek. 你看 我还是告诉你了 Oh, look at that. I did know how to tell you. 嘿 各位 球要落下了 Hey, everybody, the ball is going. 什么？ What? 球要落下了 The ball is dropping. 再过二十秒就是午夜 In 20 seconds, it'll be midnight. 兴奋的时刻即将到来 And the moment of joy is upon us. 看来没有约会的约定奏效了 Looks like that "no-date pact" thing worked out. 大家看起来都好开心 我讨厌这样 Everybody looks so happy. I hate that. 不是每个人都开心 嘿 巴比 Not everybody is happy. Hey, Bobby. 一 新年快乐 One. Happy New Year! 这么说好了 我不是数字大师… You know, I just thought I'd throw this out there. I'm no math whiz... 但是这里有三对男女 ...but I do believe there are three girls and three guys right here. 噢 我今晚谁都不想亲 Oh, I don't feel like kissing anyone tonight. 我谁都不能亲 I can't kiss anyone. 所以我要亲每个人？ So I'm kissing everyone? 不 你不能亲罗斯 他是你哥 No, no, no. You can't kiss Ross. That's your brother. 太好了 大家都能亲到 除了我 Perfect. Perfect. So now everybody's getting kissed but me. 好吧 谁来亲我？ All right. Somebody kiss me. 谁快来亲我 已经午夜了 快来亲我 Somebody kiss me. It's midnight. Somebody kiss me. It's midnight. 好吧… All right. All right. All right. 亲了 There. 我真的希望能成功 I wanted this to work so much. 我还是很投入 I'm still in there, you know? 帮他换尿布 抓跳蚤 Changing his diapers. Picking his fleas. 但他却视为理所当然 But he's just phoning it in. 深爱某人…却得不到回报 It's just so hard to accept that something you love so much... 好痛苦 懂吗？ ...doesn't love you back, you know? 我想那贱人打断了我的牙齿 I think that bitch cracked my tooth. # Friends.S01E11.1994.BluRay.1080p.x265.10bit.MNHD-FRDS.txt 你觉得他们有昨天的《每日新闻》吗？ Do you think they have yesterday's Daily News? - 干嘛？ - 只是想看我的星座命理… - Why? - I just wanna check my horoscope... 准不准 ...see if it was right. 天啊 菲比 现在别回头看 Oh, my God. Phoebe. Don't look now, but, behind you there's a guy... 你背后有个 将会令我们伤心欲绝的帅哥 ...who has the potential to break our hearts and plunge us into depression. 在哪里？ Where? 到妈妈怀里来 Ooh, come to Mama. 他来了 酷一点… Okay, he's coming. Be cool. Be cool. Be cool. - 帽子不错 - 谢谢 - Nice hat. - Thanks. - 我们应该有所行动 吹口哨 - 才不要 - We should do something. Whistle. - We're not gonna whistle. - 来吧 吹… - 不 - Yeah, come on, do it. - No. - 快点… - 呜呼 - Do it. Do it. Do it. - Woo-hoo! 我不敢相信你居然做出这种事 I can't believe you did that. 我为什么会叫 "呜呼"？ Why did I woo-hoo? 难道我期望 他回过头来然后说 I mean, what was I hoping? He'd turn around and say: "我喜欢那声音 我现在就要你？" "Ooh, I love that sound. I must have you now"? 我只希望我们能帮上一点忙 I just wish there was something we could do. 你好 昏迷的师哥 Hello. Hello, coma guy. 起来 你这娘娘腔 起来… Get up, you Girl Scout! Up, up, up! - 菲比 你在干什么？ - 或许没人试过这一招 - Phoebe, what are you doing? - Maybe nobody's tried this. 希望至少能知道他的名字 I wish we at least knew his name. 瞧他这张脸 Would you look at that face? 即使在昏迷中 他仍一副精明样 我猜他是个律师 I mean, even sleeping he looks smart. I bet he's a lawyer. 你有看见他手关节上的凹凸吗？那代表他有艺术细胞 Yeah, but did you see the dents in his knuckles? That means he's artistic. 好 他是个兼职教雕塑的律师 Okay. He's a lawyer who teaches sculpting on the side. 而且他会跳舞 And he can dance. 他是那种静静听你讲话的人 And he's the kind of guy who, when you're talking, he's listening... 而不是说 "对 我知道" ...you know, and not saying, "Yeah, I understand"... - 却想着你裸体的样子 - 别说了 - ...but wondering what you look like naked. - Oh, stop it. 我希望男生都像他这样 I wish all guys could be like him. 我知道 I know. 难道纽约没有适合你们的清醒男生？ Are there no conscious men in the city for you two? - 他身旁没人照顾 - 我们觉得应该负起责任 - He doesn't have anyone. - Yeah. We feel kind of responsible. 我不敢相信你会喊 "呜呼" I can't believe you said, "Woo-hoo." 连我都不说 "呜呼" I don't even say, "Woo-hoo." 喔 她出现了 Oh, she's coming up. She's coming up. 稍后 Folks, when we come back... 我们将和风趣的诺拉•泰勒•宾来聊一聊她的新书 ...we'll talk about her new book Euphoria Unbound... 《无边的快感》 你得叫你的孩子上床睡觉了 ...with always-interesting Nora Tyler Bing. Put the kids to bed for this one. 我们别看这个 其他电视台有《柏尼斯之周末夜》 Don't watch this. Weekend at Bernie's is on Showtime and HBO and Cinemex. - 不行 - 拜托 她是你妈妈耶 - No way. - Come on. She's your mom. 所以才要看《柏尼斯之周末夜》 Exactly. Weekend at Bernie's. 死人的裤裆部分被打几十次 很有看头 Dead guy getting hit in the groin 20, 30 times. - 不看吗？ - 钱德 我得告诉你 - No? - Chandler, I gotta tell you... 我爱你妈妈写的书 ...I love your mom's books. I love her books. 飞机上不能没有她的书陪伴 她的书太酷了 I cannot get on a plane without one. I mean, this is so cool. 你无法想象当你11岁的时候 You wouldn't think it's cool if you were 11... 你的朋友们争相传阅 第79页《情妇婊子》时的感觉 ...and all your friends were passing around page 79 of Mistress Bitch. 拜托 钱德 我超爱你妈妈的 她一级棒 Come on, Chandler. I love your mom. I think she's a blast. - 你这么说是因为她不是你妈妈 - 拜托 她是… - You can say that. She's not your mom. - Oh, please. She's the... 亲爱的 Hi, sweetie. 那个意大利通心粉 什么时候从罗马回来的？ When did Rigatoni get back from Rome? - 昨晚 - 真的？ - Last night. - Really? 难道他的飞机没在空中炸成火球？ So then his plane didn't explode in a big ball of fire? 只是我做的一个梦 Just a dream I had. 但… But, phew. 嘿… 她上节目了 Hey, hey, hey. She's on. 诺拉•宾 Ah. Nora Bing. 等一下再谈你的书吧 Before we get to the book. 听说你在伦敦被逮捕？ What is this about you being arrested in London? What is that about? - 你妈妈被逮捕？ - 嘘 我正在深感骄傲呢 - Your mom was arrested? - Shh, I'm busy beaming with pride. 说来有点难为情… This is kind of embarrassing... 有时我在和一个男人亲热后… ...but occasionally after I've been intimate with a man... - 她怎会说难为情？ - 嘘 - Why would she say that's embarrassing? - Shh. 我非常想吃宫保鸡丁 I just get this craving for Kung Pao chicken. 透露太多了 That's too much information. 现在你正为新书做宣传 情况如何？ So now you're doing this book tour thing. How's that going? 还不错 明天我将前往纽约 虽然我不太想去 Oh, fine. I'm leaving for New York tomorrow, which I hate. 但我的儿子住那儿 我爱他 But I get to see my son, who I love. 哦 Oh. 我只能从电视上知道 一般的妈妈都会打电话 This is the way that I find out. Most moms use the phone. 别误会 只是我无法把你与母亲这个词亲联系起来 You know, don't take this wrong, I just don't see you as a mom somehow. - 我绝对没有恶意 - 不 我是个很棒的妈妈 - I don't mean that bad. - Oh, no. I'm a fabulous mom. 我儿子的第一盒保险套 是我买给他的 I bought my son his first condoms. 然后他就欲火焚身 And then he burst into flames. "国会正讨论新削减预算赤字法案" Let's see. "Congress is debating a new deficit-reduction bill. "市长想再度提高地铁票价" The mayor wants to raise subway fares again. "今天最高气温是45度" The high today was 45." 还有各球队正在比赛 And, oh. And teams played sports. - 叫格伦如何？ - 不好 - What about Glen? - No. - 他可以是格伦 - 不 还不够特别 - He could be a Glen. - Mm-mm. Not special enough. 亚格•曼侬怎么样？ Ooh, how about Agamemnon? 太特别了 Way too special. 我饿死了 我想吃什么 I'm famished. What do I want? 拜托 别又是宫保鸡丁 Please, God, don't let it be Kung Pao chicken. 你看了那节目 感觉如何？ Oh, you watched the show. What did you think? 我觉得你应该更放开一些… Well, I think you need to come out of your shell just... 怎么是这种地方？ What is this dive? - 只有你才会选这种地方 - 哦 - Only you could've picked this place. - Oh. 闭嘴 这里很有意思 Come on. Shut up. It's fun. - 嗨 - 抱一个 - Hi. - Give me a hug. - 我想我们现在可以喝点龙舌酒了 - 我知道我可以 - Well, I think we're ready for some tequila. - I know I am. - 谁要喝烈酒？ - 我要 - Who's doing shots? - Hit me. - 我也来 - 这是你的 罗斯？ - I'm in. - There you go. Ross? 我不太喝烈酒 Uh, I'm not really a shot-drinking kind of guy. 抱歉 我们迟到了 Hi. Sorry. Sorry we're late. 我们太忙 忘了看时间 We, uh, kind of just, you know, lost track of time. 但是人可以改变 But a man can change. 有人要我赞扬任何事物吗？ Anyone want me to appraise anything? 宾太太 告诉你 我拜读过你所有的大作 Mrs. Bing, I have to tell you, I've read everything you've ever written. 我说真的 我读过《午夜快感》后 No, I mean it. When I read Euphoria at Midnight... 就一心想成为作家 ...all I wanted to do was become a writer. 别这么说 我能办到 大家就都能办到 Oh, please, honey. If I can do it, anybody can. 你只需先描述几个欧洲城市 You just start with half a dozen European cities... 以各种委婉语言形容男性生殖器 ...throw in 30 euphemisms for male genitalia... 然后碰… 就能写成一本书了 ...and, bam, you have got yourself a book. 各位 这是我妈妈 My mother, ladies and gentlemen. 226房有留言吗？ Yeah, any messages for room 226? - 你还好吧 猛男？ - 我还好 - You okay, slugger? - Oh, yeah. I'm fine. I'm fine. 你今晚是怎么了？ What is with you tonight? 没什么… Nothing. Nothing, nothing, nothing. 好 谢谢 Okay, thank you. 是因为那个意大利舔手男对吧？ It's the Italian hand-licker, isn't it? 不 是因为被他舔的人 No. It's the one he's licking. 她应该和你在一起 She's supposed to be with you. 你真行 You're good. 罗斯 我卖出上亿本的书 Oh, Ross, listen to me. I have sold 100 million copies of my books... 知道为什么吗？ ...and you know why? 因为封面上的辣妹露两点？ The girl on the cover with her nipples showing? 不 因为我知道该如何描写 让女人陷入爱河的男人 No, because I know how to write men that women fall in love with. 相信我 我可推销不出巴洛 Believe me, I cannot sell a Paolo. 没人有兴趣 买本325页全是写巴洛的书 People will not turn 325 pages for a Paolo. 他不过是个二等货 Come on. The guy's a secondary character. 不过是最后被你搞定的纠葛 He's just a... You know, a complication you eventually kill off. 什么时候？ When? 他不是英雄主角 He's not a hero. 知道我们的英雄主角是谁？ You know who our hero is? 封面上露两点的猛男？ The guy on the cover with his nipples showing? 不 是你啊 No, it's you. - 拜托 - 不 我是说真的 - Please. - No, really. 你既聪明又性感 Come on. You're smart. You're sexy. - 真的 - 是呀 - Right. - Oh, come on, kiddo. 你会没事的 相信我 You're gonna be fine, believe me. 噢 Uh-oh. 我到街上尿就好了 Uh, I'll just pee in the street. 钱德在吗？ Is Chandler here? - 在 - 等等 过来 - Yeah. - Wait. Come here. 关于昨天晚上 Okay, uh, about last night... 你知道的… ...um, you know... 你没有告诉钱德吧？ ...Chandler. You didn't tell... 因为我想我们不需要告诉钱德 Okay, I'm thinking we don't need to tell Chandler. 只是个吻 没什么大不了的 It was just a kiss. One kiss. No big deal, right? - 对 没什么大不了的 - 没错 - Right. No big deal. - Okay. 才怪 In Bizarro-world. 你违反规定 You broke the code. - 什么规定？ - 不能亲朋友妈妈的规定 - What code? - You don't kiss your friend's mom. 姐妹还可以 火辣的姑妈或许也行 Sisters are okay. Maybe a hot-looking aunt. 妈妈不行 绝对不行 But not a mom. Never a mom. 你们在外面干什么？ What are you guys doing out here? 乔和我说过要早起去打壁球 Uh, well, Joey and I had discussed getting in an early morning racquetball game. 显然有人睡过头 But, um, apparently somebody overslept. 对 你没带球拍？ Yeah, well, you don't have your racquet. 对 我的拍子拿去修理了 No. No, I don't, because it's being restrung. 有人应该帮我准备一支拍子的 Ahem. Somebody was supposed to bring me one. 是吗 你又没说把手的尺寸 Yeah. Well, you didn't call and leave your grip size. 你们时间还真多 Okay, you guys are spending way too much time together. 好吧 我是人渣 我是人渣 Okay, I'm scum. I'm scum. - 罗斯 你怎能让这种事发生？ - 我也不知道 - Ross, how could you let this happen? - I don't know. 她不像是一般的妈妈 她很性感 Well, it's not like she's a regular mom. You know? She's sexy. She's... 你认为我妈妈不性感？ You don't think my mom's sexy? 不一样的性感 Well, not in the same way. 我得让你知道 葛洛莉雅•崔比亚尼… I'll have you know that Gloria Tribbiani... 当年也是美到不行 ...was a handsome woman in her day, all right? 你认为生七个小孩 是件容易的事吗？ You think it's easy giving birth to seven children? 哈？ Huh? 我想我们越谈越离谱了 Okay, I think we're getting into a weird area here. - 哈 - 嘿 - Aah. - Hey. - 嘿 - 你们在这里干什么？ - Hey. - What are you guys doing out here? 不是打壁球 Well, ha, ha, not playing racquetball. - 他忘了告诉我把手尺寸 - 他没带眼罩 - He forgot to leave his grip size. - He didn't get the goggles. 没错 Oh. Right. 你们似乎有问题要解决 Well, sounds like you two have issues. 再见 宝贝 Goodbye, baby. 他们是不是故意在我面前做这件事？ Do they wait for me to do this? - 你到底要不要告诉他？ - 才不要告诉他 - So are you gonna tell him? - I'm not gonna tell him. - 为何要告诉他？ - 如果你不说... - Why would I tell him? - How about, because if you don't... 他妈妈或许会 ...his mother might? 你们在这里干什么？ What are you guys doing here? 他没穿护裆 Uh, he's not even wearing a jock strap. 我刚问什么？ What did I ask? - 嗨 - 嗨 - Hi. - Hi. 你在这里干什么？ What are you doing here? 没事 我只是来 在那个… Nothing. I just thought I'd stop by, you know, after the, ahem... 那个之后 你知道的 你来这里干什么？ That I, you know. Um, so, what are you doing here? 我不是专程来此 I'm not really here. 只是顺路拿这些过来 I just thought I'd drop these off on the way. My way. 你常… Do you, um, come here a lot... 一个人来？ ...without me? 没有… No, no, no. 你认为他早上有好一点吗？ So, um, do you think he's doing any better than he was this morning? 我怎么会知道？我又没来 How would I know? I wasn't here. 真的吗？也没替他换睡衣？ Really? Not even to, um, change his pajamas? 哦 天啊 Oh, my God. 你是我朋友 我得告诉你 You're my friend. I had to tell you. 我真不敢相信 I can't believe it. 巴洛亲了我妈妈？ Paolo kissed my mom? 对 我不知道你是否注意到 他喝了很多酒 Yeah, I mean, I don't know if you noticed, but he had a lot to drink. 他酒醉的模样你也见识过 I mean, you know how he gets when he's drunk... 我办不到… 是我 I can't do this. I did it. 抱歉 是我亲了你妈妈 It was me. I'm sorry. I kissed your mom. 什么？ What? 瑞秋和巴洛的事令我很沮丧 我想我是喝太多酒 I was really upset about Rachel and Paolo and I think I had too much tequila... 诺拉 妈妈太太 宾妈妈… ...and Nora... Mrs. Mom, your Bing, was... 只是对我很体贴 但没发生什么事 She was just being nice, you know? But nothing happened. 什么都没有 可以问乔伊 乔伊刚好走进来 Nothing. Ask Joey. Joey came in... - 你知道这件事吗？ - 嗯 - You knew about this? - Uh... 知识是很难懂的 You know, knowledge is a tricky thing. 我们一起待了一天 你为何没告诉我？ I spent the entire day with you. Why didn't you tell me? 嘿… 他们被我逮到算你幸运 Hey, hey. You're lucky I caught them when I did... 不然后果可不堪设想 ...or else who knows what would've happened? 谢了 老兄 帮了大忙 Thanks, man. Big help. 我真不敢相信 你到底在想什么？ I can't believe this. What the hell were you thinking? 我没有… 我不知道 I wasn't. I don't know. I... 我和我妈妈之间的那些事 朋友中属你最清楚了 Of all my friends, no one knows the crap I go through with my mom more than you. - 我知道 - 我无法相信你会做这种事 - I know. - I can't believe you did this. - 我也无法相信 - 我还在生气你没告诉我 - Me neither. - I'm mad at you for not telling me. - 为什么生我的气啊？ - 让我用力关门吧 - What are you mad at me...? - Let me slam the door. 钱德 我没亲她 是他 Chandler, I didn't kiss her. He did. 违反规定就是这种下场 See what happens when you break the code? - 乔伊 - 啊哈 - Joey. - Aah! Uh. - 瑞秋 - 嘿 - Rach. - Hey. "《堕落女人》 作者 瑞秋•凯伦•葛林" "A Woman Undone. By Rachel Karen Green." 对 我想尝试一下 我仍在写第一章 Yeah, I thought I'd give it a shot. I'm still on the first chapter. 你认为他 "粗棉布" 监牢中的 "爱棒" 能获得解放吗？ Now, do you think his "love stick" can be "liberated from its denim prison"? 我想可以吧 Yeah, I'd say so. 另外你拼错这个词了 And there's no "J" in "engorged." - 嘿 瑞秋 - 嘿 - Hey, Rach. - Hey. - 哈罗 - 哈罗 - Hello. - Hello. - 你今晚要去医院吗？ - 没有 你呢？ - You going to the hospital tonight? - No. You? 没有 你呢？ No. You? 你刚问过了 You just asked me. 好吧 或许这是个圈套 Okay, maybe it was a trick question. - 瑞秋 我们现在能开始了吗？ - 好 - Um, Rachel, can we do this now? - Okay. 我好火热 I am so hot. 这是我爸妈在婚礼时照的 And here's a picture of my mother and father on their wedding day. 你告诉我 她是不是个美女 Now, you tell me she's not a knockout. 没想到我们会谈论这个 I cannot believe we're having this conversation. 就试着想象她没挺着大肚子 Come on, just try to picture her not pregnant. That's all. 中央咖啡厅很荣幸为各位介绍菲比•布非小姐 Central Perk is proud to present Miss Phoebe Buffay. 谢谢 Thanks. 嗨 好 Hi. Um, ahem. Okay. 这首歌是有关一个我刚认识的男生 I'd like to start with a song that's about a man I recently met... 他已成为我生命中重要的男人 ...who's, um, come to be very important to me. 好 Okay. 你无须醒来当我的男人 You don't have to be awake To be my man 只要你一息尚存 我就会在一旁守候 Long as you have brain waves I'll be there to hold your hand 虽然我们相遇不久 Though we just met the other day 我想说… There's something I have got to say 谢谢各位 我得休息一下 Okay, thank you very much. I'm gonna take a short break. 感谢菲比•布非小姐 Okay, that was Phoebe Buffay, everybody. Whoo! - 她在搞什么东西？ - 菲比刚刚… - What the hell was that? - Phoebe just started... 我是和乔伊讲话 亲老妈的人 I believe I was talking to Joey. All right, there, mother-kisser? "亲老妈的人" "Mother-kisser." 我闭嘴 I'll shut up. 钱德 我知道你仍在生我的气 Chandler, can I say something? I know you're still mad at me. 我只想说那一夜有两个人 I just wanna say that there were two people there that night, okay? - 两双嘴唇 - 是 我希望她亲口告诉我 - There were two sets of lips. - Yes, well, I expect this from her. 她一直都是个佛洛依德梦魇 Okay? She's always been a Freudian nightmare. 如果她一直这样 你为何不找她谈谈？ Okay, but if she always behaves like this, why don't you say something? 因为太复杂了 一团乱 Because it's complicated. It's complex. 你亲了我妈妈 Hey, you kissed my mom. 我们正在排练希腊剧 We're rehearsing a Greek play. - 真幽默 排练完了吗？ - 没有 - That's funny. We done now? - No. 你不找她谈？不说出你的感受？ Okay, you mean you're not gonna talk to her, tell her how you feel? 不 别以为你亲过她 That would be a no. Just because you played tonsil tennis with my mom... 就自以为了解她 相信我 不能找她谈 ...doesn't mean you know her, all right? Trust me, you can't talk to her. 到底是能还是不能？ Okay. "You can't"? Or you can't? 好 这是我的手指 好 这是我的膝盖 Okay, that's my finger. Okay, that's my knee. 还在排练 Still doing the play. 好 你对他怎么了？ All right, what did you do with him? - 你醒了 - 瞧瞧你 - You're awake. - Look at you. 感觉如何？ How do you feel? 头有点晕 基本上还行 Uh, a little woozy, but basically okay. 你的气色好极了 Gosh, you look good. 我感觉好极了 I feel good. 你们是谁？ Who are you? - 对不起 - 我叫菲比•布非 - Sorry. - I'm Phoebe Buffay. 我叫摩妮卡盖勒 我一直在照顾你 I'm Monica Geller. I've been taking care of you. 我们一直在照顾你 We both have. - 雕刻艺术品是你们送的？ - 其实只有我一个 - So the Etch A Sketch is from you guys? - Actually, it's just from me. - 我替你做脚底按摩 - 知道是谁帮你刮胡子吗？是我 - Yeah, I got you the foot massager. - Know who shaved you? That was me. - 我念书给你听 - 我唱歌给你听 - I read to you. - I sang. Ha. 谢了 Well, thanks. - 我的荣幸 - 不客气 - Oh, my pleasure. - You're welcome. 我想那就再见了 So I guess I'll see you around. 什么？就这样？ What? That's it? "再见"？ "See you around"? - 不然要我说什么？ - 我不知道 - Well, what do you want me to say? - Well, I don't know. 或许该说 Maybe, uh: "你真好" "That was nice. "这对我来讲意义重大" It meant something to me. "我会打电话给你" I'll call you." - 好吧 我会打给你 - 一点诚意都没有 - All right. I'll call you. - I don't think you mean that. 典型的男人 This is so typical. 我们付出 You know, we give... 付出 ...and we give... 不断的付出 ...and we give. 却得不到任何回报 And then we just get nothing back. 有一天他醒来却只说 "再见" And then one day, it's just, you know, you wake up and "See you around." 走吧 菲比 Let's go, Phoebe. 知道吗？我们以为你与众不同 You know what? We thought you were different. 不过我想这只是昏迷的缘故 But I guess it was just the coma. 楼下的车已发动 The car's running downstairs. 我只想拿几本我的书给你朋友 I wanted to drop off these copies of my book for your friends. - 需要在里斯本帮你买什么？ - 不了 知道你要去就够了 - Anything you want from Lisbon? - No, just knowing you're there is enough. 好吧 要乖哦 我爱你 All right. Well, be good. I love you. 你亲了我最好的罗斯 You kissed my best Ross. 好像说错了 反正差不多 Or something to that effect. 好吧 Okay. 我做了蠢事 Look, it was stupid. - 愚蠢至极 - 愚蠢至极 - Really stupid. - Really stupid. 我也不知道是怎么发生的 And I don't even know how it happened. 抱歉 孩子 我保证不会再发生这种事 I'm sorry, honey. I promise it will never happen again. - 我们没事吧？ - 没事 - Are we okay now? - Yeah. 不… No. No. 男人与门之间禁忌的爱 Ah, the forbidden love of a man and his door. 嘘 Shh. 他说了 不只是亲吻的事 一切都说出来了 He did it. He told her off. And not just about the kiss, about everything. - 开玩笑吧？ - 别 - You're kidding? - No. 他说 "你何时才能成熟 开始有个妈妈的样子？" He said, "When are you gonna grow up and start being a mom?" - 哇 - 等等 她回答说 - Wow. - Wait, then she came back with: "问题是 你何时才能长大 了解我有大屁股？" "The question is, when are you gonna grow up and realize I have a bomb?" 等等 你确定她不是说 Okay, wait. Are you sure she didn't say: "你何时才能长大 了解我是你妈妈" 吗？ "When are you gonna grow up and realize I am your mom?" - 这样比较说得通 - 你也这样认为吗？ - That makes more sense. - You think? 是啊 Yeah. 现在情况怎么样？ So, what's going on now? 我不知道 我一直在这里说给你听 I don't know. I've been standing here spelling it out for you. 我什么都听不到 等等… I don't hear anything. Wait, wait, wait. 你看见什么？ What do you see? 很难说 他们好小而且上下颠倒 It's hard to tell. They're so tiny and upside down. 等等 等等 Wait, wait, wait. 他们走过来 他们走过去 They're walking away. They're walking away. 不 不是 他们走过来了 快逃 No, they're not. They're coming right at us. Run, run! 你还好吧 孩子？ You okay, kiddo? - 还好 - 当个乖孩子 - Yeah, I'm okay. - All right. You be good. 小心开车 Drive safe. - 你好 宾太太 - 盖勒先生 - Mrs. Bing. - Mr. Geller. 嘿 Hey. 你当真？ You mean that? 对 有何不可？ Yeah, why not? - 我告诉她了 - 噢 - So I told her. - Oh. - 情况怎么样？ - 简直太糟了 - How did it go? - Awful. Awful. 没有比这更糟糕的 Couldn't have gone worse. - 感觉怎样？ - 不错 - Well, how do you feel? - Pretty good. 我告诉她了 I told her. 瞧 看到没有？ Well, see? 或许我亲你妈妈不是个坏主意… So maybe it wasn't such a bad idea, you know, me kissing your mom, huh? 不过我们不必继续往下说了吧 But we don't have to go down that road. 这只是第一章 Now, this is just the first chapter... 我要大家坦白的意见 ...and I want your absolute honest opinion. Okay? 在第二页中他的手没伸向她那"尖挺"的双峰 Oh, and on page two, he's not reaching for her "heaving beasts." 什么是"乳投"？ What's a "niffle"? 你在尖挺的双峰上可以找到 You can usually find them on the heaving beasts. 好吧… 算我不会打字 All right, all right, so I'm not a great typist. 你有看到这句吗 "他这只巨大跳动的笔"？ Wait, did you get to the part about his "huge, throbbing pens"? 他写作时你可得离远一点 Tell you, you don't wanna be around when he starts writing with those. - 好了 别看了 还给我 - 不 - All right, that's it. Give them back. - No. # Friends.S01E12.1994.BluRay.1080p.x265.10bit.MNHD-FRDS.txt 不 不… 够了 No, no, we're done. We're done, man. 斯娃婶婶 别喊了 Aunt Silv, stop yelling. 如果你告诉过我你要素面条 All I'm saying is, if you had told me vegetarian lasagna... 我就会给你做素的了 ...I would've made vegetarian lasagna. 好吧 肉都在第三层 Well, the meat's only every third layer. 也许你能把它们刮下来 Maybe you could scrape. 罗斯 你真的把所有婴儿书都读了？ Ross, did you really read all these baby books? 嗯 你可以把我塞到子宫里的任何地方 Yep. You could plunk me down in the middle of any woman's uterus... 用不着指南针 ...no compass... 我都能从里面爬出来… ...and I could find my way out like that. 噢 太棒了… Ooh, this is cool. 书上说在有些地方 人们真的吃胎盘 It says in some parts of the world people actually eat the placenta. 这酸奶算是吃不下去了 And we're done with the yogurt. 对不起 Sorry. 我是为了帮你 我可不是承包宴席的 Aunt Silv, I did this as a favor. I am not a caterer. 那你让我拿这一打面怎么办？ What do you want me to do with a dozen lasagnas? 说话真好听 斯娃婶婶 Nice talk, Aunt Silv. 你用这张嘴亲弗莱蒂叔叔吗？ You kiss Uncle Freddie with that mouth? 嗨 罗斯 Hey, Ross, listen. 你现在知道了 你的宝贝就这么大？ Do you know that right now your baby is only this big? - 这是你孩子 - 嘿 - This is your baby. - Heh. 你好 爸爸 Hi, Daddy. 你好 Hello. 为什么你不和妈咪一起住？ How come you don't live with Mommy? 为什么妈咪和另一个女人一起住？ How come Mommy lives with that other lady? 什么是女同性恋？ What's a lesbian? 亲爱的 你能说的 泊科农斯 Honey, you can say it. It's Poconos. Poconos. 就像 泊科-阿-农斯 It's like "poke a nose." 啊 Ah. 戳一下鼻子 Poke a nose. 啵 啵 啵 Blah, blah, blah. -那么 我听见泊科农斯了吗？ -是的 - So did I hear "Poconos"? - Yes. 我妹妹让我们去她那度周末 My sister's giving us her place for the weekend. 呜呼 第一次周末结伴出游 Woo-hoo. First weekend away together. -是啊 进展了一大步 -我知道… - Yeah, it's a big step. - I know. 啊 就是个周末 没什么 It's just a weekend. Big deal. 不是说就玩玩不认真的吗？ Wasn't this supposed to be just a fling, huh? 这… 该 Shouldn't it be... 玩完了吧 现在？ ...flung by now? 我想 我们已远远超出玩的范围了 I mean, we are way past the "fling" thing. 我现在的感觉只有在 I'm feeling things I've only read about... 丹尼尔•斯仃的书里才找得到 ...in Danielle Steel books, you know? 我是说 当我和他在一起的时候 我完全 完全地… I mean, when I'm with him, I'm just totally, totally... 恶心 我本能的恶心 Nauseous. I'm physically nauseous. 我该怎么办？打电话给移民局？ What am I supposed to do, huh? Call lmmigration? 我可以打电话给移民局 I could call lmmigration. 我喜欢孩子 他们的小鞋 I love babies with their little baby shoes... 小脚指头 小手… ...and their little baby toes and their little hands... 好了 你别再这样了 Okay, you're gonna have to stop that... 永远不要 ...forever. 需要新桌子了 Need a new table. 你这么想？ You think? - 嗨 嗨 进来 - 你好 - Hey, hey, hey. Come on in. - Hey. Hello. 我把书都拿回来了 I brought the books... 摩尼卡送爱心 送你这些面条 ...and Monica sends her love along with this lasagna. 哦 太好了 Oh, great. 是素的吗 苏珊不吃肉 Is it vegetarian? Because Susan doesn't eat meat. 我肯定是素的… I'm pretty sure that it is. Yeah. 我拿到超声波结果了 So I got the results of the amnio today. 告诉我 都还… Oh, tell me. Is everything? 完全彻底的健康 Totally and completely healthy. - 太棒了 太棒了 - 哈哈 - Oh, that's great. That is great. - Ha, ha. 你和苏珊什么时候认识的休伊•路易斯？ Hey. When did you and Susan meet Huey Lewis? 那是我们的朋友塔尼亚 Uh, that's our friend Tanya. 当然是你们的朋友塔尼亚 Of course it's your friend Tanya. 你不想知道性别吗？ Don't you wanna know about the sex? 性？ The sex? 光想你和苏珊一起的样子 我就够呛了 Yeah, I'm having enough trouble with the image of you and Susan together. 你要再把塔尼亚加进来 呃… But when you throw in Tanya... 孩子的性别 罗斯 The sex of the baby, Ross. 你知道孩子的性别了？ Oh. You know the sex of the baby? - 嗯哼 - 噢… - Uh-huh. - Oh, oh, oh! - 想知道吗？ - 不 - Do you want to know? - No, no, no. 我不想 绝对不想 No, I don't want to know. Absolutely not. 我想你知道 你应该到时侯低头一看 No, I think you shouldn't know until you look down there... 然后说 "哦 带那个的" ...and see, "Oh, there it is." 或不带的… Or isn't. - 你好 罗斯 - 苏珊 - Oh. Hello, Ross. - Susan. 那么？ So? 你知道了吗？ So did you hear? 是的 我们知道了 一切OK Yes, we did. Everything's A-okay. 噢 那太… Oh, that's so cool. 真的是… It really is. Ha, ha. 我们知道那个…？ Do we know? - 是的 当然知道了 它是个… - 嘿… - We certainly do. It's going to be a... - Hey, hey! 你好？ Ho, ho! Hello? 这有人不想知道 就站在这呢 See, a guy who doesn't wanna know standing right here. 噢 那么 我们猜的对吗？ Oh. Ha, ha. Uh, well, is it what we thought it would be? - 唔 - 啊 - Mm-hm. - Aah! 什么？ What? 我们以为是男是女？ Okay, what did we think it' was gonna be? No, no, no. 我不想知道 不想 I don't want to know. Don't want to know. Okay. 我想我大概该走了 You know, I should probably just go. - 好的 谢谢你的书 - 没问题 - Well, thanks for the books. - No problem. Okay. 苏珊 Susan. 好吧 我们该先告诉谁 你家人 还是黛比和罗娜？ All right, who should we call first? Your folks or Deb and Rhona? 你好 Hello? 嗯… Uh... 没事 我不想知道 Never mind. I don't wanna know. 那么就因为这是我的桌子 就得让我买新的？ Okay, so just because it was my table, I have to buy a new one? 规则上讲是的 That's the rule. 什么规则？没有什么规则 What rule? There's no rule. 如果有 就是你欠我个桌子 If anything, you owe me a table. - 你从哪得的这个结论？ - 这个桌子一直很结实… - How did you get there? - I believe this piece of furniture was fine... 直到你开始在早餐时蹂躏黄油 ...until your little breakfast adventure with Angela Delveccio. 你知道这事？ You knew about that? 这么说吧 看到那罐黄油的惨相 The impressions you made in the butter... 根本连想象都省了 ...left little to the imagination. 那我们合买怎么样？ Okay, okay. How about if we split it? 你什么意思 一起买？ What do you mean, like, buy it together? 是啊 Yeah. 你认为我们到了做这样事的程度了吗？ Do you think we're ready for something like that? - 为什么不？ - 这可是个很大的承诺 - Why not? - Well, it's just a big commitment. 我意思是 要是有人想搬出去呢？ I mean, what if one of us wants to move out? - 为什么 你要搬吗？ - 我不搬呐 - Why, are you moving out? - I'm not moving out. 你要是搬的话 得告诉我 好吗？ You'd tell me if you were moving out, right? - 好 好 只是我上个室友… - 我知道提普所有的事 - Yes, it's just that, with my last roommate... - Oh, I know all about Kip. 我们一起买了个日式古桌 后来 他要结婚走人 We bought a hibachi together, and then he ran off and got married... 结果事情搞得很糟 ...and things got pretty ugly. 好吧 我问你点事 So let me ask you something. 作为室友 提普比我好吗？ Was Kip a better roommate than me? 哦 别这样 Oh, don't do that. 你的日程有些变化 You've got a couple changes in your schedule. 你四点的香蕈按摩推迟到四点半 Your 4:00 herbal massage has been pushed back to 4:30. 还有尚穆 福德太太取消了五点半的日式指压 And Ms. Summerfield canceled her 5:30 shiatsu. 谢谢 Okay. Thanks. 噢 你三点的顾客来了 Oh. Here comes your 3:00. 我不想表现的不专业 但是 诱人呃… I don't mean to sound unprofessional, but, yum. 巴洛 你来这干什么？ Oh. Paolo. Hi. What are you doing here? 瑞秋告诉我你… Uh, Rachella tell me you... 按摩？ ...massage? 是的 瑞秋说得对 Yeah, well, Rachella's right. Yeah. 哦 Oh. 好吧 我不知道你刚才说什么 我们开始吧 Okay, I don't know what you just said, so let's just start. 我… Uh, I am, uh... 需要裸体？ ...being naked? 你说了算 Um, that's really your decision. 我是说 有的人喜欢… I mean, some people prefer, you know, to take off... 噢 你光着身子 Ooh, oops! Being naked. 我不能相信你不想知道 我意思是 我可不能不知道 I can't believe you don't want to know. I mean, I could not know. 如果医生知道 卡萝和苏珊都知道 I mean, if the doctor knows, and Carol knows, and Susan knows... 摩尼卡也知道 And Monica knows. 你怎么知道的？我都不知道 Heh. How could you? I don't even know. 卡萝因为面条打电话道谢 我问了 她告诉我了 Carol called to thank me for the lasagna. I asked. She told me. 那么孩子是？ So, what's it going to be? 哇 Whoa. 哦 太好了现在他都知道了 我还不知道 Huh? Oh, great. Now he knows and I don't know. 对不起 当了姑姑 我太兴奋了 I'm sorry. I'm just excited about being an aunt. 还有叔叔… Or an uncle. 嗨 菲比 Hey, Phoebe. Hey, Pheebs. 很好 Fine. - 怎么了？ - 对不起 - Phoebe, what's the matter? - Nothing. I'm sorry. 我就是 我不舒服 I'm just... I'm out of sorts. 我们能要点热牛奶咖啡吗？ Hey, can we get some cappuccino over here? 噢 对了 是叫我 Oh, right. That's me. 那个卖桌子的地方七点就关了 走吧 Hey, Chandler. That table place closes at 7. Come on. 好吧 Fine. 怎么了？ Phoebe. What is it? - 好吧 你知道巴洛？ - 我了解他那点把戏的 是的… - You know Paolo? - I'm familiar with his work, yes. 他调戏我 Look, he made a move on me. - 商店明天还会开 - 再来点咖啡 - Whoa. The store will be open tomorrow. - More coffee over here, please. 到底怎么回事？ Well, what happened? 他来按摩 Well, he came in for a massage... 本来挺好的直到… ...and everything was fine until... - 天哪 - 你确定？ - My God. - Are you sure? 噢 是的 我确定 Oh, yeah. I'm sure. 然后突然间 他的手就不算什么问题了 And all of a sudden, his hands weren't the problem anymore. 他那儿…？ Was it? 童子军都能在那扎营了 Oh, Boy Scouts could've camped under there. 噢 Ooh. - "噢" 什么？ - 马•瑟曼 - "Ooh," what? - Ma Thurman. - 噢 - 那个女演员 - Oh. - The actress. 乌玛•瑟曼 Uma Thurman! 谢了 瑞秋 Thanks, Rach. - 那么你打算怎么办？ - 你必须告诉她 - What are you gonna you do? - You have to tell her. 这是道德上的义务 作为朋友… You have to tell her. It's your moral obligation as a friend... 女人 我认为这涉及到女权问题 伙计们？ ...as a woman. I think it's a feminist issue. Guys? Guys? 你必须告诉她 Oh, yeah, you have to tell her. 女权问题 这是我的观点 Feminist issue? That's where I went. 她会恨我的 She is gonna hate me. 这样啊 Yeah, well. 你挑一个 挑一个 Will you pick one? Just pick one. 那个怎么样？ Here, how about that one? 那是放在院子里用的 That's patio furniture. 那有什么？难道人们进屋后会想 "哦吼 我又出去了" So what? Like people are gonna come in and think, "Uh-oh, I'm outside again." 当然 Fine. 那鸟桌怎么样？ What about the birds? 不知道 鸟桌不会对你说 I don't know. Birds just don't say: "你好 坐这 吃点什么 " "Hello, sit here. Eat something." 那你选吧 You pick one. 好吧 那瓢虫桌怎么样？ How about the ladybugs? 这样 忘了鸟和红昆虫 建议点有品位的餐桌 Oh, so forget about the birds, but big red insects suggest fine dining? 好 你想要鸟 就要鸟吧 Fine. Do you want the birds? Get the birds. 不是这样 我不要 Not like that, I won't. 提普会喜欢鸟桌的 Kip would've liked the birds. - 嘿 - 嗨 菲比 - Hey. - Hi, Pheebs. 你要搬出去吗？ Are you moving out? 这不全是我的行李 No, these aren't all of my suitcases. 这个是巴洛的 This one's Paolo's. 嗯… Um... 瑞秋 我们能谈谈吗？ Um, Rachel, can we talk for a sec? 好的 当然… Well, sure. Just for a sec, though... - 就一会 巴洛正在来的路上 - 哦 - ...because Paolo's on his way over. - Oh. 好吧 嗯… Okay. Um... 好吧 Okay. 呃… Um... - 菲比 - 嗯 好吧 - Oh, Pheebs... - Um, okay. 我们认识还不久 Um, ahem. We haven't known each other for that long a time. 我有三件事你应该知道 And, um, there are three things that you should know about me. 一 朋友是我生命中最重要的 One, my friends are the most important thing in my life. 二 我从不说谎 Two, I never lie. 三 我做的提子燕麦饼干是最好的 And three, I make the best oatmeal-raisin cookies in the world. 谢谢 菲比 Okay. Thanks, Pheebs. 上帝啊 Mm, my God. 为什么我从来没吃过这些？ Why have I never tasted these before? 我不经常做 因为我想... Oh, I don't make them a lot... 这对别的饼干来说不太公平 ...because I don't think it's fair to the other cookies. 天呐 Ahem, God. 好吧 你是对的 这是我吃过的最好的提子燕麦饼干 Well, you're right. These are the best oatmeal-raisin cookies I've ever had. - 这也证明了我不说谎 - 我想是的 - Which proves that I never lie. - I guess you don't. 巴洛调戏我 Paolo made a pass at me. 你们看怎么样？ So, what do you think? 我想这是我见过的最漂亮的桌子 I think it's the most beautiful table I've ever seen. 我知道 I know. 你得把盘子平衡在这些小人头上吗？ So how does this work? Gonna balance the plates on these little heads? 管他呢 我们在水槽边吃饭 来吧 Who cares? We'll eat at the sink. Come on. 闪开你的小人 罗斯 Heads up, Ross. 得分 你们真臭 Score! You suck. 你没事吧？ Are you okay? 我需要牛奶 I need some milk. 我有牛奶 I've got milk. 给你… Here you go. 好点了吗？ Better? 没有 No. 我真太蠢了 Ugh! I feel so stupid. 我想起来那天… I think about the other day, with you guys, you know. 我还是 "哦 巴洛 他真好" And I was all, "Oh, Paolo. He's so great. "他让我觉得真…" He makes me feel so..." Ugh! 天哪 God. 我真觉得尴尬 I'm so embarrassed. 我是他调戏的那个 I'm the one he hit on. 如果我没遇见他 I unleashed him on you. If I'd never met him... 事情就不会发生 ...this would've never happened. - 真对不起 - 不 我对不起你 - I'm so sorry. - No, I'm sorry. 是我对不起 No, I'm sorry. 应该是我 等等 Oh, wait. Oh. - 我们道什么歉？ - 不知道… - What are we sorry about? - I don't know. 对 他才是猪 Right. He's the pig. - 真是猪 - 哦 天哪 他真是头猪 - Such a pig. - Oh, God, he's such a pig. - 他就像一个… 恶心猪 - 对 就像是… - Oh, he's like a big disgusting pig... - Yeah, like a... - 猪人 - 是的 不错 - Pig man. - Yes, good. Okay. 但他是我的猪人 Oh, but he was my pig man. 为什么我看不出来？ How did I not see this? 噢 我知道 Oh, I know! 是因为… Because... 他太帅了 ...he's gorgeous. 他太迷人 And he's charming. - 当他看你的时候… - 好的 菲比 - And when he looks at you... - Okay. Okay, Pheebs. 结束 The end. 天啊 Ugh. God. 我应该瞒着你吗？ Should I not have told you? 相信我 让我知道是对的 No, trust me, it's much better that I know. 只是我更喜欢以前那样 不知道的时候更好过一些 Uh, I just liked it better before. It was better. 她只是把事情想的太好了 I think she took it pretty well. 巴洛现在就在那边 所以… You know, Paolo's over there right now, so... 我们应该过去 看看她有没有事 Yeah, we should get over there and see if she's okay. 稍等片刻 Just one second. - 得分 - 比赛 - Whoo! Score. - Game. Us. 不错 Yes. 来吧 菲比 Come on, Pheebs. 哇 Whoo. 那么 看起来 我们打得你们屁滚尿流 Well, it looks like, uh, we kicked your butts. 不 她打得我们屁滚尿流 No, no. She kicked our butts. 你可以参加奥林匹克的"站一边看"之队 You could be on the Olympic "Standing There" team. 得了吧 二对一 Come on. Two on one. 你还在这干什么？她刚和那男的分手 What are you still doing here? She just broke up with the guy. 该你趁虚而入啦 It's time for you to swoop in. 什么？现在？ What? Now? 是的 现在正是时候 Yes. Now is when you swoop. 你得确保巴洛走出屋子后 You gotta make sure that when Paolo walks out... 你是瑞秋见到的第一个男人 ...the first guy Rachel sees is you. 得让她知道你是那么好 而他一无是处 She's got to know that you're everything he's not. 你就像 像反面的巴洛 You're like... Like the anti-Paolo. 我这天主教朋友说的对 My Catholic friend is right. 她现在很烦恼 你就在那陪伴她 She's distraught. You're there for her. 你帮她承担所有烦恼 You pick up the pieces, and then you usher in: 然后你就走向了罗斯时代 The Age of Ross. 看到了吧？ See this? See? - 怎么样了？ - 别盯着看 - How's it going? - Don't stare. 现在她刚把他的衣服从阳台上 扔下去 She just finished throwing his clothes off the balcony. 现在是他们比比画画的 Now there's just a lot of gesturing and arm-waving. 要么是 "你怎么能？" 或 "大胸脯" Okay, that is either, "How could you?" Or "Enormous breasts." 他过来了 Here he comes. 我… Uh, I am, uh... 说再见 ...to say goodbye. 好的 再见 Oh, okay, bye-bye. 巴洛 Paolo. 我非常憎恨你对瑞秋做的事 但我还有五个面条没处理掉 I really hate you for what you did to Rachel. But I still have five of these... 在烤箱里用375度烤到奶酪冒泡就行了 ...so heat it at 375 until the cheese bubbles. 我只想告诉你 Paolo, I just wanna tell you... 我要代大家说 当我说… ...and I think I'd speak for everyone when I say... 哦 看看她呀… Oh. Just look at her. 伙计们 我认为最好我们中只去一个 Oh, you guys, I really think only one of us should go out there... - 这样她就不会被压垮… - 你对 - ...so she's not overwhelmed. - Oh, right. 而且那个人应该是我 And I really think it should be me. 嘿 Hey. 你没事吧？ You all right? 我好点了… Oh. I've been better. 过来 Come here. 听着 Listen... 他远远配不上你… ...you deserve so much better than him. 我意思是 你… You know? I mean, you... 你应该找一个能明白拥有你是多么幸福的人 You should be with a guy who knows what he has when he has you. 罗斯 Ross... 什么？ What? 我讨厌死男人了 I'm so sick of guys. 我都不想看见男的 I don't want to look at another guy. 我也不想考虑别的男人 I don't want to think about another guy. 我甚至不想靠近任何一个男人 I don't even want to be near another guy. 哈 Huh. - 罗斯 你真太好了 - 哦 哈… - Ross, you're so great. - Oh, ha, ha. - 你怎么样？ - 你没事？ - Are you all right? - Are you okay? 一般吧 Medium. Heh. - 还有饼干吗？ - 有 - Any cookies left? - Yeah. 看 瑞秋 Heh. See, Rach, um... 我不认为发誓再不要男人是个好答案 See, I don't think swearing off guys altogether is the answer. I really don't. 我认为你需要建立一个先进的筛选程序 I think what you need is to develop a more sophisticated screening process. 我只想先单身一阵 No. No. I just need to be by myself for a while. 我得先弄明白我想要什么样的 You know? I just gotta figure out what I want. 不 不 No, no. 因为不是所有人都像巴洛 See, because not all guys out there are gonna be a Paolo. 不 我知道 我知道 No, I know. I know. 而且我肯定 你的小儿子不会长成他那样 And I'm sure your little boy's not gonna grow up to be one. -什么？ -什么？ - What? - What? 我有了个儿子？ I'm having a boy? 不 Uh, no. 不 事实上 你没有儿子 No. In fact, you're not having a boy. 我有了儿子 I'm having a boy. 我是有了儿子吗？ Am I having a boy? - 是 你有儿子了 - 啊 - You're having a boy. - Aah! - 我有儿子了 - 是的 - I'm having a boy. I'm having a boy. - Yes! - 什么？ - 怎么了？ - What? - What is it? 我有儿子了 我有儿子了 I'm having a boy. I'm having a boy. 嘿 Hey. 我们已经知道了 We already knew that. 我有儿子了 I'm having a son. 嗯 Um... 好的 这样一局又就结束了 Yes. And that would be a shutdown. 闭嘴吧 Shutout! 你们去哪？来呀 再来一局 Where you guys going? Come on, one more game. - 现在是凌晨两点半 - 对 出去 - Oh. It's 2:30 in the morning. - Yeah. Get out. 你们可老是到我那屋去泡着 You guys are always hanging out in my apartment. 来吧 我就用左手 Come on, I'll only use my left hand, huh? 来吧 软蛋 Come on, wussies. - 好吧 我得走了 - 嗯 - All right. Okay. I gotta go. - Mm-hm. 我走了 I'm going. 我已经走了 And I'm gone. - 再来一局？ - 哦 好的 - One more game? - Oh, yeah. # Friends.S01E13.1994.BluRay.1080p.x265.10bit.MNHD-FRDS.txt - 抱歉 - 天啊 我受够了 - I'm sorry. - Oh, my God. That's it. 你不敲门就闯进来？ You just barge in here and you don't knock? 难道你不尊重别人的隐私权？ You have no respect for anybody's privacy. - 瑞秋 你等一下 - 不 你等一下 - Rachel, wait. - No, you wait. - 我能说一件事吗？ - 什么事？ - Can I just say one thing? - What? What? 这块布编得非常松 我仍能看见… That's a relatively open weave and I can still see your... - 你的两点 - 噢 - ...nippular area. - Ugh! 亲爱的 告诉他们你病人的故事 Honey, honey, tell them the story about your patient... 那个人如何把事想成另一件事 ...who thinks things are other things. 你了解？ You know? 例如电话响时她却去洗澡 Like when the phone rings and she takes a shower... 差不多就是那样 That's pretty much it. 但你说得很好甜 But you tell it really well, sweetie. 谢谢 Thanks. Okay. 快走开 这样我们才能谈你 Now go away so we can talk about you. 好吧 我会想念你的 Okay. I'll miss you. 他很不错吧 Isn't he great? 他好可爱 也好像很喜欢你 He's so cute. And he likes you so much. 我知道 I know. I know. 他人很好 而且很复杂 He's so sweet. And so complicated, you know? 以一位精神科医师来讲 不会太神经质 And for a shrink, he's not too "shrinky." You know? 他会在沙发上做吗？ So you think you'll do it on his couch? 我不知道… 有点奇怪 Oh. I don't know. That's a little weird. 聚乙稀做的 It's vinyl. - 好 大家还想要别的东西吗？ - 是的 - Okay. You guys want anything else? - Oh, yes. - 要 我要… - 抱歉 卖完了 - Could I have...? - Sorry, we're all out. - 其他人呢？ - 好的 - Anybody else? - Okay. 我是否错过了什么事？ Did I, uh, miss something? 她很生气 因为我看见她的乳房 No, she's still upset because I saw her boobies. 你是怎么看到她的乳房的？ What were you doing seeing her boobies? 那是意外 It was an accident. 这跟拿望远镜和甜甜圈过街的感觉不同 I wasn't across the street with a telescope and a box of doughnuts. 能换个话题吗？ Can we change the subject, please? 没错 因为那不是她的乳房 而是她的胸部 Because, hello? These aren't her "boobies." These are her breasts. 菲比 我要的不只是改变说法 Pheebs, I was hoping for more of a change. 你为什么要难为情呢？你的乳房还蛮不错的 I don't know why you're embarrassed. They were very nice boobies. "不错"？ "Nice"? 它们很 "不错"？ They were "nice"? 就这样？手套也很不错 That's it? I mean, mittens are "nice." 好 我真是… Okay. Rock, hard place... 左右为难 ...me. 你真搞笑 You're so funny. 他真的很搞笑 He's really funny. 他不讲笑话的时候 我可不想待在这里 I wouldn't want to be there when the laughter stops. 等等 回去上一句 Whoa, whoa. Back up there, sparky. 那是什么意思？ What did you mean by that? 你似乎有亲密上的问题 It seems that maybe you have intimacy issues... 你用你的幽默和人保持距离 ...that you use your humor to keep people at a distance. 哈 Huh. 我是说 我才刚认识你 我也从来没听说过你 I mean, hey, I just met you. I don't know you from Adam. 独生子 对吧？ Only child, right? 父母在你青春期前离婚？ Parents divorced before you hit puberty. 你怎会知道？ Uh-huh. How did you know? 典型课本范例 It's textbook. 各位 Hey, you guys. 你们都认识我爸吧？ You all know my dad, right? - 打算在纽约待多久？ - 就几天 - How long are you in the city? - A couple of days. 我在市中心有工作 I got a job midtown. 我想和我儿子一起住 I figure I'm better off staying with the kid... 比来回坐渡轮好 ...than hauling my ass back and forth on the ferry. 我没见过他 I don't know this one. - 他是我朋友罗杰 - 嗨 - Oh. This is my friend Roger. - Hi. - 幸会 罗杰 - 彼此彼此 - Good to meet you. - You too. 玩布偶的那个怎么了？ What happened to the, uh, puppet guy? - 爸 - 噢 - Dad, uh... - Oh, oh. 抱歉 Excuse me. 罗斯 你老婆还好吗？ So, Ross, uh, how's the wife? 哪壶不开提哪壶了？ Oh for two, huh? Heh. 钱德 快点 说点好笑的 Uh, Chandler, quick, say something funny. 我得挂电话了 我也想你 Gotta go. Ha, ha. I miss you too. 我爱你 但现在很晚了 I love you, but it's getting late now... 让我向她打声招呼 嘿 妈妈 Let me say hi. Hey, Ma. 我和包西达大夫约了时间 而且… Listen, I made the appointment with Dr. Bassida and... 什么？ Excuse me? 你知道这不是妈妈？ Did you know this isn't Ma? 她叫罗妮 Her name's Ronni. 她从事宠物殡葬业 She's a pet mortician. 好 Sure. 你和她多久了… So how long have you been... 记得小时候我常带你去海军军港… Remember when you were a kid, I'd take you to the Navy yard... 看大船？ ...and show you the big ships? - 从那时候就开始了？ - 没有 才六年 - Since then? - No, it's only been six years. 我只想勾起你美好的回忆 I wanted to give you a nice memory... 让你不会觉得我一直是个王八蛋 ...so you'd know I wasn't always such a terrible guy. 乔伊 你爱过吗？ Joe, have you ever been in love? 我不知道 I don't know. 那就是没有 Then you haven't. - 你的蕃茄烧焦了 - 你还好意思说我 - You're burning your tomatoes. - Hmm. You're one to talk. 乔 你老爸爱得无法自拔 Joe, your dad's in love, bigtime. 最糟的是我爱上两个不同的女人 And the worst part is, it's with two different women. 天啊 拜托你告诉我 其中一个是妈妈 Oh, man. Please tell me one of them is Ma. 当然其中一个是你妈妈 你秀逗了？ Of course one of them's Ma. What's the matter with you? 这就像你某天起床突然发现 It's like if you woke up one day and found out... 你老爸是个双面人 ...your dad was leading this double life. 好像是为中央情报局工作的间谍 He's, like, actually some spy working for the CIA. 那倒挺酷的 That'd be cool. 这实在是太逊了 This blows. 我知道 为何父母就不能好好当父母？ I know. Why can't parents just stay parents? 为何他们就得成为一般人？ Why do they have to become people? 为何他们要… Why do they have...? 为什么… Why... 你能不能不要一直盯着我的胸部看？ ...can't you stop staring at my breasts? 什么？ What? 那一天你还看得不够吗？ Didn't you get a good enough look the other day? 好了… 我们都已是成年人 All right, we're all adults here. 此事只有一个解决方法 There's only one way to resolve this. 既然你看过她的乳房 Since you saw her boobies... 你应该让她看你的小鸡鸡 ...I think, uh, you're gonna have to show her your pee-pee. 想都别想 You know, I don't see that happening. 快点 他说得没错 以眼还眼 Come on. He's right. Tit for tat. 我不会让你看的 Well I'm not showing you my tat. 谁啊？ Hello? - 是菲比 - 还有罗杰 - It's Phoebe. - And Rog. 快上来 Come on up. 这下可好 罗杰来了 Oh, good. Rog is here. - 罗杰怎么了？ - 没什么 小事 - What's the matter with Rog? - Nothing. It's a little thing. 我讨厌这家伙 I hate that guy. 为什么？因为他太善于分析 这是职业病啊 What? So he was a little analytical. That's what he does. 拜托 他没那么糟 Come on, he's not that bad. 你这里错了 如果当初我感觉到她是女同志… That's where you're wrong. Why would I marry her... 我何必和她结婚呢？ ...if I thought on any level that she was a lesbian? 我也不确定 I don't know. 或许你想让你的婚姻失败 Maybe you wanted your marriage to fail. - 哈 - 为什么？我为什么会这么做？ - Ha, ha. - Why? Why would I? Why? 为什么… Why? Why? Why? 我也不确定 或许自信心不足 I don't know. Maybe low self-esteem? 或许是弥补你抢兄弟姊妹风头的事情 或许… Maybe to compensate for overshadowing a sibling. Maybe... 等等 回到兄弟姊妹的话题 Wait. Go back to that "sibling" thing. 嗯 我不知道 Well, I don't know. 你让你的婚姻碰壁 It's conceivable that you sabotaged your marriage... 好显示你兄弟姊妹在父母面前没那么失败 ...so the sibling would be less of a failure in the parents' eyes. 这太荒谬了 她不成才 我一点都不会感到内疚 That's ridiculous. I don't feel guilty for her failures. - 你认为我不成才？ - 他不错吧？ - Oh, so you think I'm a failure? - Isn't he good? 不 我不是那个意思 Yeah. No. That's not what I was saying. 多年来我以为你支持我 All these years, I thought you were on my side... 但或许你婚姻失败的目的是想巴结爸妈 ...but maybe you were sucking up to Mom and Dad... 好让他们更心疼你 ...so they'd favor you. 嘿 我娶女同志 是想让你看起来更好 Hey, I married a lesbian to make you look good. 你说得对 You're right. 我说 你说得对 I mean, you're right. 那不是威伯的问题 而是威伯游乐宫 It wasn't just the Weebles, but it was the Weeble Play Palace... 和威伯游轮的问题 ...and the Weeble's Cruise Ship... 它上面的救生艇让威伯能缓缓驶出 ...which had this little lifeboat for the Weebles to wobble in. 那很难受 That's tough, tough stuff. 菲比 我们现在该走了 不然就赶不上电影了 Pheebs, if we're gonna catch that movie, we gotta go. 希望你好过一点 瑞秋 Okay. Feel better, okay? - 菲比 我们快来不及了 甜心 - 好的 - We're gonna be late, sweetie. - Okay. - 谢谢你做的一切 摩妮卡 - 不客气 - Listen, thanks for everything, Mon. - No problem. 各位 很高兴和各位再度见面 It was great seeing you again. 摩妮卡 饼干别吃太多 Mon, uh, easy on those cookies, okay? 切记 那些东西只是食物… Remember, they're just food... 不是爱 ...they're not love. 我讨厌这家伙 I hate that guy. 晚安 各位 Good night, you guys. 看 这是我们订的女人 Oh, look. It's the woman we ordered. 嘿 需要帮忙吗？ Hey. Can, uh... Can we help you? 不用 谢谢 我在等乔伊•崔比亚尼 Oh. No, thanks. I'm just waiting for, uh, Joey Tribbiani. 我就是乔伊•崔比亚尼 I'm Joey Tribbiani. 喔 不是你 是老乔伊 Oh. Oh, no, not you. Big Joey. 天啊 Oh, my God. 你比照片上帅多了 You're so much cuter than your pictures. 我是罗妮 I'm Ronni. 想吃起司片吗？ Cheese Nip? 乔伊的脑子有点秀逗了 Uh, Joey's having an embolism... 但我要起司片 ...but I'd go for a Nip. 大部分人在宠物过世后 You see, most people, when their pets pass on... 希望他们像睡觉那样躺着 ...they want them laid out like they're sleeping. 但有时有些人要他们摆出姿势 But occasionally you get a person who wants them in a pose. 像追自己的尾巴 Like, uh, chasing their tail. 或跳起来接住飞盘 Or, uh, jumping to catch a Frisbee. 乔伊 如果我先走一步 我的姿势要像找钥匙一样 Joey, if I go first, I want to be looking for my keys. - 好好笑 - 嗨 乔 - That's a good one. - Hey, Joe. 嗨 爸爸 罗妮来了 Hey, Dad. Ronni's here. - 嗨 - 嘿 - Huh? - Hi. - 嘿 - 嘿 - Hey. - Hey. 亲爱的 Hello, babe. 你来做什么？ What are...? What are you doing here? 你的假发留在我的住处 Oh, uh, you left your hair at my apartment. 我想你明天开会用得上 I figured you'd need it for your meeting. 谢谢 Thank you. Uh... 谁想玩大老二？ So who's up for a big game of Kerplunk? 听着 我… Look, I, uh... 我不该来这里 I shouldn't have come. 我该走了 我不想错过最后一班地铁 I gotta go. I'll miss the last train. 不 我不想让你这么晚还搭地铁 No, I don't want you taking that thing this late. - 那我要睡哪里？这里吗？ - 哇 - Where am I gonna stay? Here? - Whoa. 我们去住饭店 We'll go to a hotel. - 不行 - 不行 - No, you won't. - No, we won't. 你们去饭店就一定会嘿咻 If you go to a hotel, you'll be doing stuff. 我要你们待在这里 这样我就可以盯着你们 I want you right here, where I can keep an eye on you. 你要盯着我们？ You're gonna keep an eye on us? 没错 先生 That's right, mister. 不管你年纪多大 只要住在我家屋檐下… I don't care how old you are, while you're here... 一切就得听我的 ...you're gonna live by my rules. 那就是不准你和你女朋友睡在一起 And that means no sleeping with your girlfriend. 哇 他好严格 Wow, he's strict. 爸 你睡我房问 Dad, you'll be in my room. 罗妮 你睡钱德的房问 Ronni, uh, you can stay in Chandler's room. 谢谢 你真是个好孩子 Thanks. You're a good kid. 来 我带你去看我房问 Come on. I'll show you to my room. 感觉真奇怪你没说 "不 谢了 时候不早了" That sounds weird when it's not followed by, "No, thanks, it's late." 好 只有今晚而已 明天你就得做出改变 Okay. This is just for tonight. Starting tomorrow, you gotta change. - 六年时间可不短 - 什么改变？ - Six years is long enough. - What kind of change? - 和罗妮分手 - 我不能 - Break up with Ronni... - I can't. 要不就和我妈妈离婚 这样是不对的 Then come clean with Ma. This is not right. 我不想听 快进我房里 I don't wanna hear it. Now go to my room. 嘿 踢踏舞者 Hey, kickie. - 你在干什么？ - 想让自己舒服一点 - What are you doing? - Trying to get comfortable. - 穿着内裤我睡不着 - 你非穿不可 - I can't sleep in my underwear. - Well, you're gonna. 我一直在想… I've been thinking... 我总是看见女人叠在女人上面 ...about how I'm always seeing girls on top of girls. 她们是尾对尾相接 还是是像煎饼一样叠起来？ Are they end-to-end, or tall, like pancakes? 你知道我什么意思 这些和我约过会的女人 You know what I mean. How I date all these women. 因为我总是想 当真命天女出现时 I always figured, when the right one comes along... 我就会勇往直前 坚持到最后 ...I'll be able to be a standup guy and go the distance, you know? 但如今看见我爸 我想… Now I'm looking at my Dad thinking... 你不是他 你是你自己 You're not him, you're you. 当他们希望你继承你爸的事业时 你有屈服吗？ When they wanted you to go into your father's business, did you cave? - 没有 - 没有 - No. - No. 你决心从事没有工作的演艺事业 You decided to go into the out-of-work-actor business. 这不是一件容易的事 但你办到了 That wasn't easy, but you did it. 我也相信 当真命天女出现时 And I believe that when the right woman comes along... 你会有勇气对她说 ...you'll have the guts to say: "抱歉 我已婚" "No thanks, I'm married." 你真的这样认为？ You really think so? 真的 我真的这样认为 Yeah. I really do. - 谢谢 钱德 - 滚开 - Thanks, Chandler. - Get off. - 嗨 - 嗨 - Hi. - Hi. 有事吗？ May I help you? 乔伊说我能用你的浴室 因为钱德正在用我们的 Uh, Joey said I could use your shower since, uh, Chandler's in ours. 好 你是谁？ Okay. Who are you? - 我叫罗妮 罗妮•罗普拉诺 - 哦 - Oh, uh, I'm Ronni. Ronni Rapalono. - Uh-huh. 情妇？ The mistress? - 请进 - 谢谢 - Um, come on in. - Thanks. 我叫瑞秋 浴室在那里 Hi, I'm Rachel. Bathroom's up there. 嘿 听好 罗妮 Hey, Ronni. 钱德进浴室多久了？ How long has Chandler been in the shower? 大约五分钟 Oh. Like, uh, five minutes. 太好了 Perfect. 请系好安全带 Fasten your seat belts... 看小鸡鸡的时间到了 ...it's pee-pee time. 嘿 崔比亚尼先生 Hey, Mr. Trib. 嘿 早安 亲爱的 Hey. Good morning, dear. 钱德•宾 该换我看你的小东西了 Chandler Bing, it's time to see your thing. - 你是怎么搞的？ - 我以为你是钱德 - What's the matter with you? - I thought it was Chandler. 你应该在浴室 这样我才能看见你的小东西 You were supposed to be in there so I could see your thing. 我的小东西在里面 和我在一起 Sorry, my thing was in there with me. - 嘿 - 菲比 - Hey. - Hey, Pheebs. - 还好吧？ - 不错 - How's it going? - Good. Oh, oh. 罗杰想邀大家一起吃晚餐 Roger's having a dinner thing and he wanted me to invite you guys. - 怎么了？ - 没事 - So, what's going on? - Nothing. 只是… It's just that, uh... 是罗杰 It's Roger. 我不知道 有些事… Um, ahem, I don't know. There's something about... Ahem. 基本上我们认为他… Basically, we just feel that he's, uh... 我们讨厌他 We hate that guy. 我们讨厌他 We hate him. 菲比 我们很抱歉 We're sorry, Pheebs. 好吧 Uh-huh. Okay. 是不是他太有洞察力 Don't you think maybe it's just that he's so perceptive... 所以吓到你们了？ ...that it freaked you out? - 不 我讨厌他 - 不 我们讨厌他… - No, I hate him. - No, we hate him. 抱歉 I'm sorry. 妈妈 你来干什么？ Ma. What are you doing here? 我把这个带给你 I came to give you this... - 还有这一巴掌 - 哇 - ...and this. - Ow. 你的大戒指打到很痛 Big ring. 你为什么要对你爸讲一大堆 Why did you fill your father's head with that garbage... 关于改邪归正的废话呢？ ...about making things right? 一切事情本来都很好 Things were fine the way they were. 里面有鸡肉 放冰箱冰好 There's chicken in there. Put it away. 拜托 乔伊 真的 For God's sake, Joey. Really. 等一下 你都知道？ Hold on. You knew? 我当然知道 你认为呢？ Of course I knew. What do you think? 你爸又不是詹姆士•邦德 Your father is no James Bond. 你应该听听他的谎言 You should have heard his cover stories. "我在会计家里睡" "I'm sleeping over at my accountant's." 那是什么屁话？拜托 I mean, what is that? Please. 你怎能…？ So then, how could you...? 记得你爸以前的模样吗？ Do you remember how your father used to be? 总是大喊大叫 总是不开心 Always yelling. Nothing made him happy. 连工作室和瓶内的小船也无法让他开心 Not that wood shop, not those stupid little ships in the bottle. 现在他很开心 Now he's happy. 这样很好 他好歹有个嗜好 I mean, it's nice. He has a hobby. 妈妈 我无意冒犯 但是… Ma, I don't mean to be disrespectful, but... 你到底在说什么？ ...what the hell are you talking about? - 我是说 那你怎么办？ - 我很好啊 - I mean, what about you? - Me? I'm fine. 听着 亲爱的… Look, honey... 在理想的世界中 ...in an ideal world... 没有她 而且你爸是个大帅哥 ...there'd be no her and your father would look like Sting. 再告诉你别的 And I'll tell you something else: 自从那贵妇犬一样的女人出现后 Ever since that poodle-stuffer came along... 他感觉很羞耻 变得对我很用心 ...he's been so ashamed of himself that he's been more attentive. 并且开始对我体贴 He's been more loving. 每天都像我们的结婚纪念日 It's like every day is our anniversary. 我该为你高兴？ I'm happy for you? 不必了 Well, don't be. 因为现在全搞砸了 Because now everything's screwed up. 我只想回到像从前一样 I just want it the way it was. 妈妈 对不起 Ma, I'm sorry. 我以为我做了你想做的事 I just did what I thought you'd want. 我知道 亲爱的 我知道 I know you did, cookie. Oh, I know you did. 告诉我 So tell me... 你见到她了吗？ Did you see her? 见到了 Yeah. 你比她漂亮十倍都不止 You're 10 times prettier than she is. 嘴巴真甜 That's sweet. 我打得过她吗？ Could I take her? 你有这么大的戒指 她没辙 With this ring, no contest. - 怎么了 甜心？ - 没事 - What's wrong, sweetie? - Nothing. 到底怎么了？快说嘛 No, no. What's wrong? Come on. 好吧 Okay. 好吧 我没事 It's nothing. I'm fine. 只是我的朋友 It's just, um... It's my friends. 他们对你有意见 They have a liking problem with you... 其实… ...in that, um... 他们不喜欢你… ...they don't. 他们不喜欢我？ Oh. They don't? 不过 你知道… But you know... 他们看不见 只有我才能看见的好处 ...they don't see all of the wonderfulness that I see. 他们看不见你体贴的一面 They don't see all the good stuff and all the sweet stuff. 他们认为你有点… They think you're a little... - 什么？ - 执着的恐怖 - What? - Intense and creepy. 噢 Oh. 但我 菲比不这么认为 But I don't. Me. Phoebe. 我对他们的反应 丝毫不感到惊讶 Well, I'm not at all surprised they feel that way. 不惊讶吗？这就是你棒的地方 You're not? See, that's why you're so great. 当群体动力失调时 Actually, it's quite typical behavior... 这是很平常的反应 ...when you have this kind of dysfunctional group dynamic. 这种相互依赖… You know, this kind of codependent... 情绪障碍 ...emotionally stunted... 坐在那家烂咖啡屋 拿着又大又蠢的咖啡杯 ...sitting in your stupid coffeehouse, with your stupid big cups... 或许还有乳头在上面 ...which, I'm sorry, might as well have nipples on them. 你们都会说 "噢 定义我的性格 定义我的性格" And you're all like, "Oh, define me. Define me. "爱我 我需要爱" Love me. I need love." 你和你爸谈过了？ So you talked to your dad, huh? 对 他要以我妈妈希望的方式 继续对我妈妈劈腿 Yeah. He's gonna keep cheating on Ma, like she wanted. 我妈妈要继续假装她一无所知 Ma's gonna keep pretending she doesn't know even though she does. 我妹妹蒂娜不能再见她丈夫了 And my sister Tina can't see her husband anymore... 因为他接到禁制令 ...because he got a restraining order. 这两件事没关系 但我今天才听说 Which has nothing to do with it, except that I found out today. 哇 Wow. 沃顿山这里的事全变了 Things sure have changed here on Walton's mountain. 乔伊 你没事吧？ So, Joey, are you okay? 或许吧 Yeah, I guess. 他们是… 父母 It's just... You know, they're parents. 你不得不随他们的意思 After a certain point, you gotta let go. 即使你知道这样做不对 Even if you know better... 但你还是得让他们犯自己的错误 ...you gotta let them make their own mistakes. 我只是想… And just think... 几年后我们就会和他们一样 ...in a couple years, we get to turn into them. 拜托 Oh, please. 如果我像他们一样 我不是变成… If I turn into my parents, I'll either be an alcoholic blond... 追逐年轻帅哥的金发醉鬼老玻璃 ...chasing after 20-year-old boys... 就是变得和我妈妈一样 ...or I'll end up like my mom. - 嗨 - 嗨 菲比 - Hey. - Hey, Pheebs. 还好吧？ How's it going? 还好 只是我和罗杰分手了 Okay, except I broke up with Roger. 噢 Oh. 得了吧 Yeah, right. 不 是真的 No, no, really. Aw. - 怎么了？ - 我说不上来 我是说… - What happened? - Ugh. I don't know. I mean... 他是个好人 He's a good person... 而且还对我很体贴 ...and he can be really sweet. 他在某些方面很适合我 And in some ways, I think he is so right for me. 只是… 我讨厌这个人 It's just, I hate that guy. 怎么样？ Hey, Joey. What's going on? 一劳永逸解决乳房风波 Clear the tracks for the boobie payback express. 下一站 瑞秋•葛林 Next stop, Rachel Green. 乔伊 你在搞什么鬼？ Joey, what the hell were you doing? 对不起 看错乳房 Sorry, wrong boobies. 乔伊 你好 Hello, Joey. 你好 亲爱的 Hello, dear. # Friends.S01E14.1994.BluRay.1080p.x265.10bit.MNHD-FRDS.txt 真的啦 罗斯 她要你 I'm telling you, Ross, she wants you. 她一点也不认识我 只是刚好是邻居 She barely knows me. We just live in the same building. - 有来往吗？ - 有次借我颗鸡蛋 - Any contact? - She lent me an egg once. 那就算数了 You're in. 是喔 Oh, right. - 罗斯 - 你好 - Hey, Ross. - Hey. 别这样 你该回到情场来 Come on, Ross. You gotta get back in the game here. 跟瑞秋的恋情不成 前妻爱女人 The Rachel thing's not happening, your ex-wife's a lesbian, you... 不用我再说第三位了吧 I don't think we need a third. 打扰了 可以给颗全蛋吗 有壳的那种 Excuse me. Could we get an egg over here, still in the shell? 蛋？ An egg? 对 你就上前跟她说 "蛋还你"| Yeah. Go up to her and say, "Here's your egg back. I'm returning your egg." 这样很有魅力啊 I think it's winning. - 明明就很瞎 - 她会喜欢 - I think it's insane. - She'll love it. - 谢谢 - 谢谢 拿去 - Thank you. - Thank you. Here. 带着蛋去吧 Go with the egg, my friend. 去啊 Go, go, go. - 你想会成功吗？ - 是自杀 他携有鸡蛋 - Think it'll work? - It's suicide. The man's got an egg. - 不可以这样 - 怎样？不可以怎样？ - You cannot do this. - What? Do what? 罗杰明晚要约她出去 Roger wants to take her out. 菲比 不行 你难道忘了当初为什么甩掉他的？ No. Pheebs. Don't you remember why you dumped the guy? 因为他让人毛骨悚然 Because he was creepy. 刻薄 又让人有点害怕 And mean. And a little frightening. 但情人节有人约 总比没的好 Still, it's nice to have a date on Valentine's Day. - 大家好 - 好 - Hi. - Hi. 菲比 想约毛骨悚然男 随时都可以 You can go out with a creep any night of the year. 至少我就这样 I know I do. - 嗨 - 嗨 - Hi. - Hi. 明晚你们有什么打算？ What are you doing tomorrow night? 那要看今晚的发展 Actually, tomorrow night depends on how tonight goes. - 今晚呢 - 不行 不准反悔 - Oh. Uh, listen, about tonight... - No, no, don't you dare bail on me. 她答应跟我约会 就是因为我答应帮她朋友找伴 She's only going out with me because I'm bringing a friend for her friend. 但她朋友听来似乎是… But her friend sounds like such a... 悲惨又很糟 这我知道 但… Pathetic mess. I know, but... 别这样啦 老兄 她很渴望 很脆弱 我想呢 Come on, man, she's needy, she's vulnerable. I'm thinking: 谢了 Thanks. 跟珍妮丝分手后就没约会过 今晚你一定要去 You haven't been out with a woman since Janice. You're doing this. - 嗨 - 嗨 - Hi. - Hi. - 她答应了 - 啊 - She said yes. - Ahem. 太好了 老兄 Yes! Way to go, man. - 蛋你没还人家？ - 对 - Still got the egg, huh? - Yeah. - 我样子如何？ - 哦 - How do I look? - Oh, um... 才不在乎 ...I don't care. 洛莲来了 There's Lorraine. 记住喔 不能跟我换 Now, remember, no trading. 漂亮的给你 悲惨的给我 You get the pretty one. I get the mess. - 乔伊 - 好 - Hi, Joey. - Hey. 瞧瞧 Well, well. 看看这是谁 Look what you brought. 很棒喔 Very nice. 看看你带了谁？ And what did you bring? 她还在寄放外套 She's checking her coat. 乔伊 我去洗手 把计程车味道洗掉 Joey, I'm gonna go wash the cab smell off of my hands. 帮我叫白葡萄酒 帮珍妮丝叫杯红葡萄酒好吗？ Will you get me a white zinfandel and a glass of red for Janice? 珍妮丝？ Janice? 喔 Oh... 我的… ...my... 天啊 ...God. 是珍妮丝 Hey, it's Janice. 我要逃走了 从窗户出去 Okay, I'm making a break for it. I'm going out the window. 别走啦 拜托 我想约洛莲好久了 No, don't, please. I've been waiting for forever to go out with Lorraine. - 冷静点 - 冷静？ - Just calm down. - Calm down? Calm down? 一个五个月内被我甩过两次的女人 你硬把我们凑成对 You set me up with a woman I've dumped twice in the last five months. 喂 Hey. 别对我吼好吗？这让我好紧张 Can you stop yelling? You're making me nervous... 我一紧张就尿不出来 ...and I can't go when I'm nervous. 抱歉 你说的没错 I'm sorry. I'm sorry. You're right. 快点 快尿 快尿 Come on! Do it, do it, do it! Come on! 好啦 罗杰是很怪 但跟皮特•卡尼比起来不算什么 Okay, Roger was creepy, but he was nothing compared to Pete Carney. - 皮特•卡尼谁？ - 爱哭鬼皮特？ - Which one was he? - Pete the Weeper? 每次做爱都会哭的家伙 还记得吗？ Remember the guy that used to cry every time we had sex? "你也舒服吗？" "Oh, was it good for you?" 小哭一下何妨 总比不服输霍华 "强" Well, I'd take a little crying any day over Howard, the "I win" guy. "我赢了 我赢了" "I win. I win." 跟他约会两个月 都没赢过 I went out with him for two months. I didn't get to win once. 我们人这么好 怎会找到这些混蛋呢？ How do we end up with these jerks? We're good people. 不知道 可能是因为 我们拥有特别磁力 I don't know. I think we're like some kind of magnets. 我确定我有 所以我才不能戴数位手表 I know I am. That's why I can't wear a digital watch. 你那瓶酒比较多 对吧？ There's more beer, right? 记得我那个把头理光的朋友艾比吗？ Oh. You know my friend Abby who shaves her head? 她说如果想破除恶男交友魔咒 She says to break the bad-boyfriend cycle... 可以进行净身仪式 ...you can do a cleansing ritual. 菲比 这女人志愿变秃耶 Pheebs, this woman is voluntarily bald. 是啊 Yeah. 就选明晚来做啊 So we can do it tomorrow night, you guys. 情人节 很适合 It's Valentine's Day. It's perfect. 怎样的仪式？ Okay, well, what kind of ritual? 像是把他们送的东西烧掉 Okay, we can, um, burn the stuff they gave us. 或者？ Or? 或者可以脱光了又唱又跳 拿根木棍 Or we can chant and dance around naked, you know, with sticks. - 烧东西比较好 - 烧东西比较好 - Burning's good. - Burning's good. 我有可以烧的东西 I've got stuff to burn. 这个呢 You know... 打从我小时候 我就有办法用脚趾捡硬币 ...ever since I was little, I've been able to pick up quarters with my toes. 是吗？好了不起 Yeah? Good for you. 几枚硬币 还是整捆硬币？ Uh, quarters or rolls of quarters? 顺道一提 钱德 照片上有你的都被我剪了 By the way, Chandler, I cut you out of all of my pictures. 如果你想要的话 有一整袋子都是你的头 So if you want, I have a bag with just your heads. 不用了 That's okay. 真的吗？因为可以拿来作成小玩偶 Are you sure? Because you could make little puppets out of them. 然后放在残酷剧场演戏 And you could use them in your Theater of Cruelty. 不能这样 We can't do that. 哈？不能怎样？ What? What can't you do? 可以和你聊一聊？到那边？ Uh, can I talk to you for a second? Over there? 我们想走了 Uh, we might be leaving now. 你是说我跟你的"我们" Tell me it's you and me "we." 她说想在我全身涂抹东西 再舔掉 She said she wants to slather my body with stuff and then lick it off. 但我连涂抹是什么意思都不懂 I'm not even sure what slathering is. 但我很想试试 But I definitely want to be a part of it. 你不可以这样对我 Okay, you cannot do this to me. 没错 抱歉 没错 You're right. I'm sorry. You're right. 麻烦三个巧克力慕丝外带 Uh, can we have three chocolate mousses to go, please? 我要走了 I'm out of here. 信用卡给你 晚餐我请 抱歉喔 Here's my credit card. Dinner's on me. I'm sorry, Chandler. 希望她吐在你身上 I hope she throws up on you. 谢了 Thanks. - 那么 - 剩我们俩了 - So... - Just us. 好烂的一晚 Ugh, what a crappy night. 但我还满高兴从你上完厕所后 你的衬衫就从… Although I have enjoyed the fact that your shirt's been sticking out... 裤子拉链跑出来 ...of your zipper since you came back from the bathroom. 不好意思 Excuse me. 你好 How you doing? 我们这算是误交损友吗？ So do we have the best friends, or what? 乔伊算不上朋友 他是… Joey's not a friend. He's... 把信用卡留给我们用的笨蛋 ...a stupid man who left us his credit card. 再来一杯？点心？大屏幕电视机？ Another drink? Some dessert? A big-screen TV? 就再来一杯吧 I will go for that drink. 没问题 小姐 You got it. Good woman. 最贵的香槟 来一瓶 A bottle of your most overpriced champagne. - 每人一瓶 - 没错 每人一瓶 - Each. - That's right. Each. 还有一瓶罗伯•洛伊 Oh. And a, uh, Rob Roy. 我一直很好奇那是什么 I've always wanted to know. 情人节快乐 Happy Valentine's Day. 我已经开始想你了 Oh, I miss you already. 你能相信会这样吗？ Can you believe this happened? 不 不 No, no. 但却真的发生了 And yet it did. - 再见了 珍妮丝 - 亲一下啊 - Goodbye, Janice. - Kiss me. 钱德 抱歉 Oh, Chandler. Sorry. - 珍妮丝 - 摩妮卡 - Hey, Janice. - Hi, Monica. 这真的很特别 Okay. Well, this was very special. 瑞秋 快来看外头是谁 Rach, come see who's out here. 怎么…？天啊 What's going on...? Oh, my God. 珍妮丝 你好 Janice. Hi. 珍妮丝正要走 Janice is gonna go away now. 去去就回 I'll be right back. 乔伊 看谁来了 Oh. Joey. Look who it is. 哇 Whoa. 好耶 乔伊回家了 Oh, good. Joey's home now. 好有趣喔 This is so much fun. 就像在走廊重逢 This is like a reunion in the hall. 罗斯 来打个招呼 Hi, Ross. There's someone I want you to say hi to. 刚好他打来 He just happened to call. 罗斯 对 是我 你怎么猜到的？ Hello, Ross. Yes, that's right. It's me. How did you know? 我只是说如果狗会有时差 I'm just saying if dogs do experience jet lag, then... 那人一岁等于狗七岁的说法 ...because of the whole seven-dog- years-to-one-human-year thing... 在遇到狗从纽约飞到洛杉矶时 ...that when a dog flies from New York to Los Angeles... 他可不只要往返三小时 而是一个半礼拜 ...he doesn't just lose three hours, he loses, like, a week and a half. - 真有趣 - 对 - That's funny. - Yeah. 哈？ What? 这些人是谁？ Who are they? 金发是我前妻 The, uh, blond is my ex-wife. 摸她的人是她… And the woman touching her is her... 密友 ...close personal friend. 是说她们是爱人吗？ You mean they're lovers? 硬要给人标签的话 就是了 If you want to put a label on it. 喔 嘿 Wow. Heh. - 还有什么没告诉我的 - 没了 就这么多 - Anything else I should know? - Nope. That's it. 喔 还有她怀了我的孩子 Oh, and she's pregnant with my baby. 这我老是忘掉 I always forget that part. 你们好 Hello. 好 现在要艾草枝 还有圣酒 Okay. So now we need, um, sage branches and the sacramental wine. 我只有牛至叶和饮料 All I had is oregano and a Fresca. 这也可以 Um, that's okay. - 哦 - 好 - Ooh. - Okay. 好 接着要有正派男性的精子 All right. Now we need the semen of a righteous man. 要是找得到这种人 Huh. Okay, Pheebs, if we had that... 也用不着这仪式了 ...we wouldn't be doing the ritual in the first place. - 可以开始丢东西了吗？ - 嗯 可以了 - Can we start throwing things in? - Um, yeah, okay. 好 Oh. Okay. Um... 巴瑞的信 Okay. Barry's letters. 亚当•瑞特的四角内裤 Adam Ritter's boxer shorts. 跟这个人晚餐的收据 And I have the receipt from my dinner with: - 史考特•贾瑞的裸照 - 我看一下 - A picture of Scotty Jared, naked. - Let me see. 他有穿毛衣 He's wearing a sweater. - 没有 - 呃 - No. - Ew! 好 这里巴洛剩下来的意大利白兰地酒 Okay, and here we have the last of Paolo's grappa. 等等 这是不是酒精浓度很… Wait. Isn't it almost pure...? 我怎么可以在情人节甩了她？ How can I dump this woman on Valentine's Day? 不知道 你新年就甩过她啊 I don't know. You dumped her on New Year's. 老兄 我下辈子一定会转世投胎为马桶刷 Oh, man. In my next life I'm coming back as a toilet brush. 有趣的情人 你好 Hello, funny valentine. 珍妮丝 Hi, just Janice. 乔伊 小媒人 Hello, Joey, our little matchmaker. 我要好好亲亲你 I could just kiss you all over, and I'm gonna. 哦 好的 哈… Oh. Okay, heh. Ha, ha, okay. 要是你不做 那就我来 If you don't do it, I will. 你的工作是什么？ So, um, what do you do for a living? 过去几年我… Well, um for the past few years... 我还以为你答应他们可以单独拍照 不用等你 Oh, no. You said they could shoot the spot without you. 本来是这么说 I thought they could. 跟小朋友很充实 Working with children, which is really fulfilling. 我尽快回来 I'll try to get back as soon as I can. I'm sorry. 大半时间是在教科学 So I'm spending most of my time teaching science, heh... 很有趣 因为我大学主修不是科学 ...which is funny because that wasn't even my major. 真有趣 Now, that is funny. 你觉得 Hey, do you think...? 我邀卡萝过来一起吃 好吗？ Would it be too weird if I invited Carol over to join us? 因为她落单了 Because she's alone now. 又怀有身孕 又心情不好 And pregnant. And sad. - 应该可以吧 - 确定？ - I guess. - Are you sure? 谢谢 卡萝 Thanks. Carol. 要一起坐吗？ Wanna come over and join us? 不用 Oh, no. I'm fine. 来啦 大家可以挪一下 Come on, stand up. These people will scooch down. Come on. 过来坐 你们会过去一点 对吧 Come over here. You guys will scooch, won't you? 请挪一下位置 Let's try scooching. Come on. - 过来啊 - 谢谢 - Come on. - Thank you. 克莉丝汀•丽格 这位是卡萝•威利克 Uh, Kristen Riggs, this is Carol Willet. - 卡萝 克莉丝汀 - 你好 - Carol, Kristen. - How do you do? 卡萝教六年级 Um... Oh, uh, Carol teaches sixth grade. 克莉丝汀… And, uh, Kristen... 的工作… Kristen does something... 有趣的是… ...that, funnily enough... 不是她的主修 ...wasn't even her major. 查到什么？ What do we got there? 一件丝质男性四角内裤 A piece of silk boxer shorts... 一些明信片 ...some greeting cards... 好像是烧剩下的照片 ...what looks like a half-charred picture of... 这家伙比队长还多毛 Wow, that guy's hairier than the chief. 事情原委很荒谬啦 You know, it's a really funny story how this happened. 没关系 不用多说 It's all right. Don't explain. 这又不是我们第一桩营救的男友营火晚会 It's not the first boyfriend bonfire we've seen get out of control. - 这已是今晚第三桩了 - 真的吗？ - You're our third call tonight. - Really? 是啊 情人节一向是一年里最忙的日子 Sure. Valentine's is our busiest night of the year. 有东西送你 I brought you something. 有装子弹吗？ Is it loaded? 心形糖果 Oh, little candy hearts. "永远的钱与珍" "Chan and Jan forever." 特别订制的喔 I had them made special. 好了 珍妮丝 Okay, Janice. 珍妮丝 Janice. 珍妮丝 Hey, Janice. 我没办法跟你说 Look, there's no way for me to tell you this. 至少没有新的办法来跟你说 At least, there's no new way for me to tell you this. 我想我们不适合 I just don't think things are gonna work out. 没关系 That's fine. - 真的吗？ - 嗯 - It is? - Mm-hm. 因为我知道还没完 Because I know that this isn't the end. 事实上 是完了 Oh, no. You see, actually, it is. 不 才没有 因为你不会允许的 No, it isn't. Because you won't let that happen. 你到现在还不明白吗？ Don't you know it yet? 你是爱我的 钱德•宾 You love me, Chandler Bing. 不 我不爱 Oh, no, I don't. 你问问你自己 我们怎么会老是碰到一起？ Then why do you think we keep ending up together? 新年 是谁邀谁？ New Year's, who invited who? 情人节 是谁邀谁上谁的床？ Valentine's, who asked who into whose bed? - 都是我开口的 - 都是你找上我的 - I did, but... - You seek me out. 你内心深处呼唤我前来 就像雾中号角一样引航 Something deep in your soul calls out to me like a foghorn. 珍妮丝 Janice. Janice. 你要我的 你需要我 You want me. You need me. 没有我 你活不下去 You can't live without me. 而且你心知肚明 And you know it. 只是你不清楚自己很明白 You just don't know you know it. 再见啰 See you. 打电话给我 Call me. 这不是真的 我从没说你妈妈是狼权 It's not true. I never called your mother a wolverine. 你有 我发誓 真的有 You did so. I swear. I swear to... 她去厕所多久了？ How long has she been in the bathroom? 我猜她应该不在厕所 她外套都拿走了 Uh, I don't think she's in the bathroom. Her coat is gone. 可能是因为里头冷 Well, maybe it's cold in there. 看来我毁了九年来第一次有的约会 Maybe I screwed up the first date I had in nine years. - 可能就是这样 - 天啊 - That could be it. - Oh, God. 铁板还是很烫 You know, this is still pretty hot. 磨结 Mushroom. 微笑 Smile. 你不会都遇到这样的人的 可能有人肯用过餐再走 They won't all be like this. Some might even stay through dinner. - 抱歉 不好笑 - 只是... - I'm sorry. That's not funny. - No, it's just... 真的一定要像人家说的 抛开过去迎向未来那样吗？ Well, you know the whole getting-on-with-your-life thing? 一定要这样吗？ Well, do I have to? 我身旁坐着漂亮女子 I mean, well, I'm sitting here with this cute woman... 人又很好 ...and she's perfectly nice, you know? 但… But there's... 就没了 That's it. 但跟你聊天 却那么轻松有趣 And, uh, then I'm here talking to you, and it's easy and it's fun. 不用… And I don't have to... - 我懂 - 你懂？ - I know. - You know? 我有个变态提议 Here's a wacky thought. Um, ahem. - 何不我们再试试看 - 罗斯 - Let's say you and I give it another shot. - Ross. 我知道你想说什么 你爱女生 No, no, I know what you're gonna say. You're a lesbian. 但暂时把那搁下来如何？ But what do you say we just put that aside for now, you know? 把它先放在一旁好吗？ Let's just stick a pin in it, okay? 因为我们很处得来 Because we're great together, you know? 这你不否认吧 You can't deny it. 何况你肚里还有我的小孩 And besides, you're carrying my baby. - 这不是很完美吗？ - 罗斯 - I mean, how perfect is that? - Ross... 你一直这样说 但有件事却老是没变 You keep saying that, but there's something right here. 我爱你 I love you. 我也爱你 I love you too. - 但… - 别说但是 - But... - No "but." No "but." 你知道这件我们搁下的事 怎么样了吗？ You know that thing we put over here with the pin in it? 迟早会浮现的 It's time to take the pin out. 是 Yeah. 你会找到合适的人的 一定会有个人在等着你 You'll find someone. I know you will. The right woman is waiting for you. 说的简单 因为你有人了 It's easy for you to say. You found one already. 只要有个喜欢男人的女人就好了 All you need is a woman who likes men and you'll be set. 不是她 Not her. 我们午夜结束 过来接你们如何？ We get off around midnight. Why don't we pick you up then? - 好 - 好 - Okay. - Great. 那你要开消防车来吗？ So, um, will you bring the truck? - 还会让你拉消防铃 - 哇哦 - I'll even let you ring the bell. - Wohoo! - 晚点见 - 晚点见 - We'll see you later. - Bye. See you later. 谢谢 再见 Thanks. See you. 天啊 Oh, my God. 瞧 不就有了吗？ See, there you go. - 仪式奏效了 - 真的 - The cleansing worked. - You're right. 他们都是好人 They're nice guys. 是消防队员 They're firemen guys. - 有跟她们说你们结婚了吗？ - 怎么能说 - You tell them you're married? - No way. 我女朋友都不知道 我才不会说 My girlfriend doesn't know. I'm not gonna tell them. # Friends.S01E15.1994.BluRay.1080p.x265.10bit.MNHD-FRDS.txt 咖啡 Coffee. - 谢了 - 卡布奇诺 - Thank you. - Cappuccino. 热呼呼的肉桂苹果茶给摩妮卡 And a nice hot cider for Monica. 谢谢 Aw, thank you. - 瑞秋 - 怎么？ - Rach? - Yeah? 我的肉桂棒怎么有橡皮擦？ Why does my cinnamon stick have an eraser? 哦 Oh. 喔 Oh, heh. 难怪 That's why. 对不起 Sorry. 钱德？ Chandler? 泰德•拉克小姐 你今天好漂亮 Miss Tedlock, you're looking lovely today. 你袖子的长度搭起来很好看 May I say that is a very flattering sleeve length on you? 当然 Yes. 对 卡斯力克先生要你在下班前去他办公室 Well, Mr. Costilick would like you to stop by his office at the end of the day. 如果是有关恶作剧的事 我跟那一点也没关系 Oh, listen, if this is about those prank memos, I had nothing to do with them. 跟我无关 真的 Really, nothing at all. Really. 无关 Nothing. 各位 嘿 Hey, you guys. You guys. 钱德要来了 他说有个天大的消息 Chandler's coming, and he says he has this incredible news. 所以等他到了 我们要假装… So when he gets here, let's all act like, you know... - 嘿 - 嘿 - Hey. - Hey. 算了 一定会很棒的 Never mind. But it was gonna be really good. 怎么回事？ What's going on? What's up? 今天还是照常的工作 It's a typical day at work. I'm inputting my numbers... 而我老板告诉我 ...and Big Al calls me into his office... 他要升我当报表监督 ...and tells me he wants to make me processing supervisor. - 那真是太好了 - 恭喜 - That is great! - Congratulations. 于是我辞职了 So I quit. 为什么？ Why? 为什么？这只是个暂时性的工作 Why? This was supposed to be a temp job. 钱德 你在那工作5年了 Yeah, Chandler, you've been there for five years. 我知道 但如果我接受升职 I know, but if I took it this... 那就表示我就是要干这行 ...it'd be like admitting that this is what I actually do. 那有加薪吗？ So was it a lot more money? 那不重要 我只是不想成为 Doesn't matter. I just don't want to be one of those guys... 那种加班到12点 担心周网量的人 ...that's in his office until 12:00 at night worrying about the WENUS. "周网量"？ "The WENUS"? 每周预估网路用量系统 那是报表名词 Weekly estimated net usage system. It's a processing term. 喔 是这样啊 Oh, that WENUS. 那你打算怎么办？ So, what are you gonna do? 我不知道自己有何打算 I don't know. That's the thing. I don't know. 但在那公司我肯定想不出来 I'm not gonna figure it out working there. 我有你能做的事 Oh! I have something you can do. 我有个新按摩客户叫史提夫 I have this new massage client. Steve. 总之 他要开一间餐厅 Anyway, um, he's opening up a restaurant... 而他要找一个主厨 ...and he's looking for a head chef. 嗨 我在这 Um, hi there. 嗨 Hi. 我知道 你是厨师 我原先也是想到你 Oh, yeah, I know. You're a chef, I know, and I thought of you first. 但现在需要工作的是钱德 所以… But, um, Chandler's the one who needs a job right now, so... 对 我只是没有很多当厨师的经验 Yeah, I just don't have a lot of chefing experience. 除非那只是卖土司的 Unless it's an all-toast restaurant. - 怎样？ - 他要找什么厨师？ - Yeah. Yeah. - Well, what kind of food is he looking for? 他想做广泛的尝试 He wants to do something eclectic, so he's looking for someone... 他想找个人为他设计整份菜单 ...who can, you know, create the entire menu. - 天啊 - 我知道 - Oh, my God. - Yeah, I know. 所以你觉得呢？ So, what do you think? 谢了 菲比 但我不适合当厨师 Thanks, Pheeb. I just don't really see myself in a big white hat. 好吧 Okay. 喔 摩妮卡 你猜怎么着？ Oh, Monica. Guess what? 我穿这衬衫有激突吗？ Can you see my nipples through this shirt? 没有 但别担心 我很确定它们还在 No, but don't worry. I'm sure they're still there. 你要去哪里 大帅哥？ Where you going, Mr. Suit-ey Man? 我约了罗柏特•彼曼博士 Well, I have an appointment to see Dr. Robert Pilman... 职业生涯加油顾问师 ...career counselor-a-go-go. 加油是我自己加的啦 I added the "a-go-go." 职业生涯顾问师？ Career counselor? 你们都知道自己的人生方向 Hey, you guys all know what you want to do. 我不知道 I don't. 在客厅的你们 都知道自己的人生方向 Hey, you guys in the living room all know what you want to do. 你们有目标有梦想 You know, you have goals. You have dreams. 我没有梦想 I don't have a dream. 较不知名的 "我没有梦想" 演说 Ah, the lesser known "I Don't Have a Dream" speech. 我爱我的人生… Oh, I love my life. I love my life. "布莱恩的歌" Brian's Song. 会面很顺利？ The meeting with that guy went great? 很顺利 他带我参观餐厅的地点 So great. He showed me where the restaurant's gonna be. 在第十街上 It's this cute little place on 10th Street. 地方不大不小 刚刚好 It's not too big, not too small. It's just right. 那之前的屋主是金发又有养熊吗？ Was it formerly owned by a blond woman and some bears? 我周一晚上要为他掌厨 有点像试镜一样 So anyway, I'm cooking dinner for him Monday night. Kind of like an audition. 菲比 他希望你去 那很好 And Phoebe, he really wants you to be here, which will be great for me. 你可以发出好吃的声音 Because you can make yummy noises. - 你要做什么？ - 好吃的声音 - What are you gonna make? - Yummy noises. 摩妮卡 那你要煮什么？ And, Monica, what are you gonna make? 我不知道 这机会太棒了 I don't know. I don't know. It's just gotta be so great. 我知道你要煮什么了 我知道 Oh! I know what you can make. I know. 你应该煮那个东西 Oh, you should make that thing, you know, with the stuff. 你知道那个东西吗？ You know that thing with the stuff? 好吧 我不知道 Okay, I don't know. 有人知道这附近有什么地方好约会吗？ Hey, guys, anyone know a good date place in the neighborhood? 东尼餐厅如何？假如你能吃完32盎司的牛排就免费喔 Uh, how about Tony's? If you can finish a 32-ounce steak, it's free. 好吧 Okay. Ahem. 有人知道什么好地方吗？如果不是跟美洲豹约会的话 Hey, does anyone know a good place if you're not dating a puma? - 你要跟谁约会？ - 昆虫小姐吗？ - Who are you going out with? - Oh, is this the bug lady? "我爱你 罗斯" "I love you, Ross." 她的名字是西莉雅 她不是昆虫小姐 Her name is Celia. She's not a bug lady. 她是昆虫馆的馆长 She's curator of insects at the museum. 你们打算做什么？ So, what are you guys gonna do? 去吃晚餐 然后带她回我家 Well, I just thought we'd go to dinner, then bring her back to my place... 介绍她认识我的猴子 ...and I'd introduce her to my monkey. 他说的可不是隐喻 And he's not speaking metaphorically. - 所以回到你的住处 - 嗯 - So back to your place? - Uh-huh. 你是不是想或许… ？ You thinking maybe, heh-heh? 我不知道能不能… Ahem, well, I don't know, heh-heh. 我是希望能不能… I'm hoping heh-heh. 我告诉你 那猴子能迷倒女人 I'm telling you, that monkey's a chick magnet. 她一见到他那可爱的脸 一切就会搞定 She's gonna one look at his furry, cute little face and it'll seal the deal. - 啊 - 西莉雅 别担心 - Aah! - Celia, don't worry. 他不会伤害你 你要哄他 Celia, he's not gonna hurt you. Soothing tones, Celia, soothing tones. - 喔 真的很对不起 - 啊 - Okay, I'm sorry, I'm sorry. - Aah! - 来 马塞尔 - 我受不了了 - Here, here. Marcel? Marcel? - I can't stand this. - 他把爪子伸进… - 好 没事了 - He's got his claws on my... - Yeah, all right. 好了 试试这鲑鱼慕思 Okay, try this salmon mousse. - 很好 - 是吗？ - Mm. Good. - Yeah? 比其他的鲑鱼慕思好吃吗？ Is it better than the other salmon mousse? 这比较稠 It's creamier. 是吗？那是比较好吗？ Yeah? Well, is that better? 我不知道 我们说的是剁碎的鱼 摩妮卡 I don't know. We're talking about whipped fish, Monica. 我只是很开心我没有吐出来 I'm just happy I'm keeping it down, you know? 天啊 你怎么了？ God, what happened to you? 8个半钟头的性向测验 Eight and a half hours of aptitude tests... 智力测验和人格测验 结果我知道什么？ ...intelligence tests, personality tests, and what do I learn? "你很适合 在大型跨国企业…" "You're ideally suited for a career in data processing... "做资料分析" ...for a large multi-national corporation." 太好了 那你早就会做了 That's so great, because you already know how to do that. 你能相信吗？ Can you believe it? 我看起来不像能成就酷事的人吗？ Don't I seem like somebody who should be doing something really cool? 我总是想像自己能够做点… You know, I just always pictured myself doing something... 什么的 Something. 钱德 我了解… Oh, Chandler, I know, I know. 嘿 你这衬衫会激突耶 Oh, hey, you can see your nipples through this shirt. 或许这能让你开心点 Here you go. Maybe this will cheer you up. 5个钟头前 我才吃了一颗葡萄 Ooh, you know, um, I had a grape about five hours ago... 所以我最好和你分着吃 ...so I better split this with you. 本来就那么小的 那是前菜啦 It's supposed to be that small. It's a pre-appetizer. 法文叫做开胃小菜 The French call it an amuse-bouche. 这的确很开胃 Well, it is amusing. 喂？嗨 温蒂 Hello? Oh, hi, Wendy. 是的 8点钟 Yeah, 8:00. 一个钟头10块如何？ What did we say? Ten dollars an hour? 太好了 Okay, great. 好的 我们到时见了 拜 All right, I'll see you then. Bye. 钟点费10块做什么？ Ten dollars an hour for what? 我找了一起工作的女侍帮我 I asked a waitress at work to help me out. 女侍？ Waitressing? 噢 Uh-oh. 当然我有想到你 Ha, ha. Of course I thought of you. 但是… But... - 但是… - 但是怎样？ - But... - But, but? 但那一晚我必须要力求完美 But, you see, it's just this night has to go just perfect, you know... 温蒂是比较专业的女侍 ...and, well, Wendy's more of a professional waitress. 噢 Oh. 而我只是业余级的 I see. Yes. And I've sort of been maintaining my amateur status... 所以我应该在奥林匹克当女侍 ...so that I can waitress in the Olympics. 我不想吹牛 但我在1976年曾在奥地利当侍者 You know, I don't mean to brag, but I waited tables at Innsbruck in '76. 开胃小菜？ Amuse-bouche? 跟我说话 Talk to me. 好吧 今早在火车上发生一件怪事 Okay, uh, ahem, a weird thing happened to me on the train this morning... 不 不 说淫荡的话 No, no, no. Talk dirty. - 在这里？ - 快点 - Wow. Here? - Come on. 快点 Come on. 说些… Say something... 撩人的话 ...hot. - 怎么啦？ - 唔 - What? - Uh... - 什么 - 噢 - What? - Ooh. - 什么？ - 嗯… - What? - Um... 什么？ What? - 什么？ - 私处 - What? - Vulva. "私处"？ "Vulva"? 好嘛 我慌了 All right, I panicked, all right? 我没料到她会那样 She took me by surprise. 但那也不算很失败 我们最后有拥抱 You know, but it wasn't a total loss. I mean, uh, we ended up cuddling. 拥抱？有几次？ Whoa, you cuddled? How many times? 闭嘴 那很美好 Shut up. It was nice. I just... 我不认为自己会说淫秽的话 I just don't think I'm the dirty-talking kind of guy, you know? 那没什么 你就讲你想对她怎样 What's the big deal? Just say what you want to do to her. 或你想她怎样对你 Or what you want her to do to you. 或其他人想怎么来的话 Or what you think other people might be doing to each other. 我告诉你 你可以试试我 Look, I tell you what. Try something on me. 我希望你在开玩笑 Please be kidding. 为什么不？ Why not? Come on. 闭上你的眼睛 告诉我你现在想怎么做 Just close your eyes and tell me what you'd like to be doing right now. 好吧 我… Okay, I'm, uh... 我在我的公寓 I'm in my apartment... 是啊 还有呢？ Yeah, what else? 就这样 你不在那里 我们没谈这段对话 That's it. You're not there. We're not having this conversation. - 好吧 我来起头好了 好吗？ - 拜托你 乔伊 - All right. Look, I'll start, okay? - Joey, please. 来嘛 听着 Come on, come on. All right, ready? Look. 喔 罗斯 Oh, Ross. 你让我浑身着火 我要你亲吻我的身体 You get me so hot, I want your lips on me now. 看吧？ See? - 现在换你说点什么 - 我真的不想 - All right, now you say something. - I, uh... I really don't think so. 来吧 Come on. - 你喜欢这马子 对吧？ - 是啊 - You like this woman, right? - Yeah. - 想再见到她 - 当然 - You wanna see her again, right? - Sure. 如果在我面前你都说不了 你要怎么对她说？ Well, if you can't talk dirty to me, how are you gonna talk dirty to her? 现在你跟我说 你想抚摸我的屁屁 Now tell me you want to caress my butt. 好吧 转过去 Okay, turn around. 我只是不想在你盯着我看的时候说 I just don't want you staring at me when I'm doing this. 好吧 我没在看 你说吧 All right, all right. I'm not looking. Go ahead. 好吧 Okay. 我想… Ahem, I want, um... 好吧 我想… Okay, I want... 用我的唇 ...to feel... 感觉你那火热又柔软的肌肤 ...your hot, soft skin with my lips. 很好 There you go. 继续… Keep going, keep going. 我… I, uh... 我要用我的舌头… I want to take my tongue and... 还有… And... 说啊 Say it. 说啊 Say it! 舔吻你的全身 Run it all over your body... 直到我们颤抖 因为… ...until you're trembling with... 因为？ With? - 太好笑了 - 你绝不会相信的 - Funny story. - You're not gonna believe this. 没关系… It's okay. It's okay. 我一直都赞成你们凑成一对 I was always rooting for you two kids to get together. 钱德 你睡觉时 你之前工作的人又来电了 Hey, while you were sleeping, that guy from your old job called again. 又来电？ Oh. Again? - 不停不停的来电 - 又来 - And again and again and again. - And again. 喂？又来了 Hello? Heh. And again. 啊 Ah. 嘿 卡斯力克先生 你在15楼还好吗？ Hey, Mr. Costilick. How's life on the 15th floor? 是啊 我也想你 Yeah, I miss you too. 从自己的家偷笔就没那么好玩了 Yeah, it's a lot less satisfying to steal pens from your own home, you know? 你太大方了 Well, that's very generous. 但这事与钱无关 Uh, but look, this isn't about the money. 我要的不只是一份工作 You know? I need something that's more than a job. 而是自己真正在意… I need something I really care about... 外加之前你提的年终奖金？ And that's on top of the year-end bonus structure you mentioned earlier? 你的梦想 Your dream. 听着 艾尔… 我不是耍强硬 好吗？ Look, Al. Al, I'm not playing hardball here, okay? 这不是协商 我是在拒绝 This is not a negotiation. This is a rejection. 不 不… No... No, no. No, no. 不要再跟我谈数字 No, stop saying numbers! 我告诉你 你找错人了… I'm telling you, you've got the wrong guy! You got the wrong guy! 礼拜一再见 I'll see you Monday! 啊 Ah. 呼？ Huh? 哇 好大喔 Wow. It's huge. 比隔间办公室大多了 It's so much bigger than the cubicle. 这是大大的正方体 Oh, this is a cube. 你看这个 Look at this. 你有窗户 You have a window! 是啊 没有错 Yes, indeedy. - 还有漂亮的视野 - 你看 那人在尿尿 - With a beautiful view of... - Oh, look. That guy's peeing. 好了 窗景看完了 你来看这里 Okay. That's enough of the view. All right, check this out. - 来 你坐下 - 好 - Ahem. Okay, sit down here. Sit down. - Okay. 这太棒了 Okay, this is great. This is great. - 准备好了吗？ - 好了 - Ahem. You ready? - Yeah. 海伦 请你进来一下好吗？ Helen, could you come in here for a moment? 谢了 海伦 就这样 Thank you, Helen, that'll be all. 这是最后一次了 我保证 Last time I do that. I promise. 温蒂 我们说好的 Wendy, we had a deal. 对 你答应我了 Yeah, you promised. 温蒂… Wendy. Wendy. Wendy! 是谁？ Hmm, who was that? 温蒂不来了 我没有女侍 Wendy bailed. I have no waitress. 那太惨了 That's too bad. 再见 Bye-bye. - 一小时10元 - 不要 - Ten dollars an hour. - Nope. 12元 Twelve dollars an hour. 我希望我可以 但我已经计划要去走走 Mon, I wish I could, but I've made plans to walk around. 瑞秋 你结婚逃跑时 我也有帮你 You know, Rachel, when you ran out on your wedding, I was there for you. 我帮你顶下来了 如果那不算什么… I put a roof over your head, and if that means nothing to you... 一小时20元 Twenty dollars an hour. 成交 Done. - 哈罗 欢迎光临摩妮卡的家 - 你好 - Well, hello. Welcome to Monica's. - Hello. 我能帮你拿外套吗？ May I take your coat? - 嗨 史提夫 - 你好 摩妮卡 - Hi, Steve. - Hello, Monica. 你好 招待的女孩 Hello, greeter girl. - 这位是瑞秋 - 是 好的 - This is Rachel. - Yeah, okay. 一切闻起来都好香 Mm, everything smells so delicious. 我不记得曾闻过这么美味的… You know, I can't remember a time I smelled such a delicious combination of... 好吧 味道 Okay, smells. 这公寓很棒 Well, it's a lovely apartment. 谢谢 要参观吗？ Oh, thank you. Would you like a tour? 我只是说客气话 但没问题 I was just being polite, but all right. 怎么了？ What? What's up? 搭计程车过来时 史提夫抽了一根烟草 In the cab on the way over, Steve blazed up a doobie. 什么？ What? 抽大烟 吸大麻… Smoked a joint, you know? Lit a bone. Weed, hemp, ganja. 好了… Okay, okay, okay. 我听得懂 Okay, I'm with you, Cheech. Okay. 这里很干吗？ Is it dry in here? 让我给你倒杯酒 Let me get you some wine. 我想也可以开始第一道菜了 Yeah, I think we're ready for our first course too. 好… Okay... 这是意式… These are rock shrimp ravioli... - 虾饮沾胡婪叶醋酱 - 哦 - ...in a cilantro ponzu sauce... - Oh. 还加上一点… ...with just a touch of minced... 姜汁泥 ...ginger. 打我的屁屁叫我茱蒂 Well, smack my ass and call me Judy. 太好吃了 These are fantastic. 天啊 真高兴你喜欢 Oh, gosh. I'm so glad you liked them. 喜欢？我可以吃下一百盘 Like them? I could eat a hundred of them. 这样啊… Oh. Well, um... 我们只有这些 That's all there is of these... 但再过8分半钟 椰奶派就好了 ...but in about eight and a half minutes, we'll be serving some delicious tartlets. 椰奶派？ "Tartlets"? Heh. 椰奶派？ "Tartlets." 文字已经失去意义了 Word has lost all meaning. 抱歉 我能为你效劳吗？ Excuse me. Can I help you with anything? 我不知道自己要找什么耶 You know, I don't know what I'm looking for. 太棒了 油炸塔可饼 Oh, cool. Taco shells. 它们有点像玉米信封 You know, these are... They are like a little corn envelope, you know? 你不想坏了你的胃口 You know what? You don't want to spoil your appetite. 嘿 早餐麦片 Hey. Sugar-O's. 你只要再等6分半钟… You know, if you just wait another six and a half minutes... 起司通心面 我们来做这个 Oh. Macaroni and cheese. We gotta make this. 我们不做这个 No, we don't. 喔不 好吧 Oh, okay. 抱歉 Oh, sorry. 你何不就坐在这儿？ Yeah, why don't you just have a seat here? 好吧 Okay. 好吧 熊熊糖给我 Okay. Give me the Gummy Bears. 不要 Yeah, I... No. - 拿给我 - 我们一起吃 - Give them to me. - All right, we'll share. - 不行 把糖给我 - 这样你就不能吃 - No. Give me the bears. - Well, then you can't have any. - 给我 - 那不值得 - Give them to me. - This is not worth it. 熊熊翻船了 他们要溺水了 Oh, oh! Bears overboard. They're drowning. 别光站在那 丢下泳圈 救救自己吧 Hey, fellas. Grab onto a Sugar-O. Save yourselves. 救命… 我要溺死了 Help! Help! I'm drowning. Help! Help! 够了 晚餐结束了 That's it, okay? Dinner is over. - 什么？ - "什么"？ - What? - "What"? - 为什么？ - "为什么"？ - Why? - "Why"? 为什么？我等了7年才等到像这样的机会 I've waited seven years for an opportunity like this... 而你却不能用4分半钟等椰奶派？ ...and you can't even wait four and a half minutes for a stupid onion tartlet? 嘿... Hey... 真是个疯子 What a tool. 你不会想替那种人工作的 You don't want to work for a guy like that. 我知道 我只是以为这是我的机会 I know. It's just... I don't know, I just thought that this was, you know, "it." 别担心 你是很棒的厨师 Look, you'll get there. You're an amazing chef. 那些好吃的声音是很真诚的 Yeah, you know all those yummy noises? I wasn't faking. 所以你跟西莉雅怎样？ So, uh, how did it go with Celia? 我表现绝佳 Oh, uh, I was unbelievable. 好耶 罗斯 All right, Ross. 我是淫荡话语的教主 I was the James Michener of dirty talk. 那是史上最优雅的粗野话 It was the most elaborate filth you have ever heard. 里面有角色 剧情 主题 I mean, there were characters, plot lines... 还有动机 ...themes, a motif. 我还一度提到村人呢 At one point, there were villagers. 然后呢？ Oh, and, uh... 等到我们说完 Well, um, you know, by the time we finished with all the dirty talk... 时间很晚了我们都很累 ...it was kind of late and we were both exhausted, so... - 你们就拥抱 - 没错 那样很好 - You cuddled. - Yeah, which was nice. 你们想去看晚场电影吗？ Do you guys want to try to catch a late movie or something? 或许吧 不该等钱德吗？ Maybe, but shouldn't we wait for Chandler? 他跑到哪去了？ Whoa. Where the hell is he? 是的 法兰 我知道现在几点了 Yes, Fran, I know what time it is... 但我在看周网表而且我很不爽 ...but I'm looking at the WENUS and I'm not happy. 真的？让我跟你说 Oh, really? Well, let me tell you something. 你会在意因为我在意 懂吗？很好 You will care about it because I care about it. Got it? Good! 哇 Whoa. - 这样如何？ - 呃 - How's this? - Eek! - 对不起 那这里呢？ - 哦 - Sorry. How about over here? - Oh! 那就表示有效了 See, now, that just means it's working. - 会痛吗？ - 不会 - Does this hurt? - No. - 那这样呢？ - 啊 - How about this? - Aah! 很好 There you go. 我要吐了 Oh, I'm gonna throw up. # Friends.S01E16.1994.BluRay.1080p.x265.10bit.MNHD-FRDS.txt 不敢相信 都过了半小时了 This is unbelievable. It's been half an hour. 要是这是卡通 你到时都变成火腿了 If this was a cartoon, you'd be looking like a ham right about now. 服务生来了 抱歉喔 There's the waitress. Excuse me, miss. - 小姐？ - 是菲比 - Hello, miss? - It's Phoebe. - 嗨 - 嗨 - Hi. - Hi. 就点这些吗？ Okay, will that be all? 等等 你这是干嘛？ Wait, wait. What are you doing here? 我刚在那边 Yeah, um, I was over there... 然后你们说"抱歉小姐" 所以我就过来啦 ...then you said, "Excuse me, miss." So now I'm here. 不是啦 你怎么会在这上班？ No, no. How come you're working here? 对 因为离我住处近 而且围裙很可爱 Right. Because it's close to where I live, and the aprons are really cute. 从头来一遍好吗？ Can we start over? - 好 很好 我回那边去 - 不 不… - Yeah. Okay, great. I'll be over here. - No, no, no, no. 不知是不是在考验我 还是作作样子 I don't know whether he's testing me or just acting out... 但我的猴子真的失控了 ...but my monkey is out of control. 可是他一直把答录机上的留言删除 He keeps erasing the messages on my machine. 应该不是故意的 Supposedly by accident. 这事我干过 Oh, yeah, I've done that. 连续三天他抢在我前面拿走报纸 And three days in a row, he got to the newspaper before I did... 在填字游戏上尿尿 ...and peed all over the crossword. 这我可没干过 I've never done that. 你看一眼 跟我说她和她姐姐长得不像 Now tell me she doesn't look exactly like her sister. 我觉得不一样啊 I'm saying I see a difference. 她们可是双胞胎耶 They're twins. 不在乎 菲比是菲比 乌苏拉很辣 I don't care. Phoebe's Phoebe. Ursula's hot. 我们说过的那件事 还记得吗？ You know that thing when we talk about things? - 不要再做了如何 - 好 - Let's not do that anymore. - Okay. 嘿 各位 Hey, guys. Hey. 菲比 猜猜今天我们遇到谁了 Hey, Pheebs. Guess who we saw today. 有趣 好 Ooh. Oh, fun. Okay. - 连姆•尼森 - 不是 - Um, Liam Neeson. - No. - 莫利•萨佛 - 不是 - Morley Safer. - Nope. - 我的发型师 - 不 - The woman who cuts my hair. - No. 这样玩下去没完没了 Look, this could be a really long game. 你姐姐乌苏拉 Your sister, Ursula. - 真的吗？ - 真的 - Oh, really? - Yeah. 她在那个地方上班 She works at that place, uh... 瑞夫餐馆 我知道 Riff's. Yeah, I know. 你知道？她说你们好几年不讲话了 Oh, you do? She said you guys haven't talked in years. 是啊 Hmm? Yeah. 她胖了吗？ So, um, is she fat? 从我角度来看是没有 Not from where I was standing. 你是什么角度？ Where were you standing? 菲比 你们两个处不来吗？ Uh, Pheebs, so you guys just don't get along? 就一些姐妹间的小事 It's mostly just dumb sister stuff, you know? 大家都说她比较漂亮 Everyone always thought of her as the pretty one. 她也先学会走路 Oh. Oh. She was the first to walk... 虽然我只比她晚几小时 ...even though I did it later that same day. 但在我父母眼中就不稀罕了 To my parents, by then it was, "Yeah, what else is new?" 哦 Oh. 菲比 真抱歉 我要走了 我要上无痛分娩课 Pheebs, I'm sorry. I've gotta go. I've got Lamaze class. 我要上地球科学课 不过我们健身房见？ Oh, and I've got earth science, but I'll catch you in gym? 只有你和卡萝会去吗？ So is this just gonna be you and Carol? 没 苏珊也会去 No. Susan will be there too. 老爸 女同志 家长成员都到了 We've got dads. We've got lesbians. The whole parenting team. 这不会尴尬吗？ Well, isn't that gonna be weird? 不会 一开始或许会 No. It might have been at first... 但现在我已经很自在了 ...but now I'm comfortable with the situation. - 罗斯 那是我的外套 - 我知道 - Ross, that's my jacket. - I know. 我们是罗斯丹家 Hi. We're the Rostens. 我是洁西 他是麦可 I'm J.C. And he's Michael. 我怀的是龙凤胎 And we're having a boy and a girl. 厉害 下一对 Good for you. Alrighty, next? 大家好 Hi. Um, I'm, uh... Ahem. 我是罗斯•盖勒 I'm Ross Geller. 肚子里是我儿子 And, uh, that's my boy in there. 这位是卡萝•威利克 这位是苏珊•邦奇 And, uh, this is Carol Willick, and this is Susan Bunch. 苏珊是卡萝的… Susan is, um, Carol's... 谁是下一对？ Who's next? 抱歉我没听清楚 苏珊是… I'm sorry, Susan is? - 苏珊是卡萝的朋友 - 是终生伴侣 - Susan is Carol's friend. - Life partner. 就好朋友 Like buddies. 是情人 Like lovers. 女人不都这么亲吗 You know how close women can get. - 苏珊跟我住一起 - 不过跟她结婚的是我 - Susan and I live together. - I was married to her. - 是卡萝 不是我 - 有点复杂 - Carol. Not me. - It's a little complicated. - 但我们相安无事 - 没错 - But we're fine. - Absolutely. 所以双胞胎喔 So, twins. Ha. 像生两胎一样 That's like two births. 喔 Ouch. 你也一样 海伦 To you too, Helen. 妮娜•布克邦德到了 Nina Bookbinder is here to see you. 好 请她进来 Oh. Okay, send her in. 你好 Hi. - 请进 - 你找我？ - Hi, Nina. Come on in. - You wanted to see me? 是 刚在看你资料 Uh, yes. Uh, I was just going over your data. 你一直把礼拜五的数字往后延 You've been postdating your Friday numbers. 你觉得这样不好 原因是？ Which is bad, because? - 这有损我的周网量 - 哈哈 - Well, it throws my WENUS out of whack. - Ha, ha. 抱歉没听懂 Excuse me? 周网量 WENUS. Ahem. - 每周预估… - 网路用量系统 - Weekly Estimated... - Oh, Net Usage Statistics. 喔 懂了懂了 Right. Gotcha, gotcha. 不会再犯了 我不会让你的... Won't happen again. I wouldn't want to do anything to hurt your... 周网量受到减损 ...WENUS. 她不仅可爱好吗？而且还是… It's not just that she's cute, okay? It's just that... 非常非常可爱 ...she's really, really cute. 没差啦 兔子不吃窝边草 It doesn't matter. You don't dip your pen in the company ink. 罗斯 Ross. 你的小动物又去拿遥控器了 Your little creature's got the remote again. 马塞尔 把遥控器给罗斯 Marcel. Marcel, give Rossy the remote. 马塞尔 Marcel. 马塞尔 立刻把遥控器给罗斯 Marcel, you give Rossy the remote right now. 把遥控器… You give Rossy the remote... - 好极了 - 别紧张 我会搞定 - Great. - Relax. I'll fix it. 好耶 厄寇 西班牙文版也叫厄寇 Oh, cool. Urkel in Spanish is Urkel. 他怎么办到的？ How did he do this? 请问一下喔 圣诞灯一直开着 So tell me, is leaving the Christmas lights up... 是要让大家整年快乐吗？ ...part of your plan to keep us merry all year long? 有人答应要在新年拆掉灯的 No, someone was supposed to take them down around New Year's... 但显然忘了 ...but obviously someone forgot. 有人该写张纸条 Well, someone was supposed to write: 叫瑞秋去拆灯 再把纸条贴在冰箱上的 "Rach, take down the lights," and put it on the refrigera... 纸条贴多久了？ How long has that been there? 你上哪去了？ Hey, where you been? 瑞夫餐馆 乌苏拉好像喜欢我 我只点咖啡 I went back to Riff's. I think Ursula likes me. All I ordered was coffee. 她送了金枪鱼 三明治和四盘圈圈薯条 She brought me a tuna melt and four plates of curly fries. 得分 Score. 她好辣 She is so hot. 听好 你进一步行动前 Listen, okay, before you do anything Joey-like... 可能要先跟那个谁商量过 ...you might want to run it by, uh... - 真的？ - 对啊 - Yeah? - Yeah. - 菲比？ - 是 - Pheebs? - Yeah? 我约你姐好吗？ Would it be okay if I asked out your sister? 干嘛？你干嘛要这样？ Why? Why would you want to do that? Why? 这样我们约会时 她才会到啊 So that if we went out on a date, she'd be there. 喔 我是说 我姐姐不归我… Well, I mean, I'm not my sister's, you know... 那个… ...whatever. And, um... 虽然我们曾经是同一颗卵 I mean, it's true, we were one egg once. 但我们细胞分裂成两个人 But, you know, we've grown apart, so, um... 所以有何不可 好啊 I don't know. Why not? 赞 谢了 Cool. Thanks. 你没事吗？ You okay? 对 很好 Yeah, I'm fine. 要看西班牙片吗？ Do you wanna watch Laverne y Shirley? 抱歉 Sorry. - 嗨 - 嗨 - Hi. - Hi. 抱歉 我迟到了 卡萝呢？ Sorry I'm late. Uh, where's Carol? 她学校有事 家长的事 Stuck at school. Some parent-teacher thing. 你不用参加 我来学就好 You can go. I'll get the information. 不 我应该留下来 我们俩都应该上课 No, no, ahem, I think I should stay. We should both know what's going on. 好 Oh, good. 这有意思了 This will be fun. 好了 我们先从基本的第三阶段呼吸练习开始 Alrighty. We're gonna start with some basic third-stage breathing exercises. 妈妈们 请躺好 Mommies, get on your back. 教练们 请撑好妈妈的头 And, coaches, you should be supporting Mommy's head. - 什么？ - 什么？ - What? - What? 难道要我演妈妈？ I'm supposed to be the mommy? 好吧 我只好再强调一遍 精子可是出自我喔 Okay, I'm gonna play my sperm card one more time. 我搞不懂为什么 就因为我是女人 就不能当教练 I don't see why I have to miss out on the coaching training because I'm a woman. 我懂了 那你建议如何？ I see. So, what do you propose to do? - 来投硬币决定吧 - 投硬币？不… - I'll flip you for it. - Flip me for it? No, no, no. 那我选头 Heads, heads, heads. 躺下吧 孩子的妈妈 On your back, Mom. 好吧 各位妈妈 深呼吸 好好的伸展吐气 All right, mommies, take a nice, deep, cleansing breath. 很好 Good. 想象各位的阴部正在张开 Now imagine your vagina is opening... 像花儿一样 ...like a flower. 狄先生 你好 Mr. Dee. How's it going, sir? 不算太好 Uh, it's been better. 年度使用数据出来了 The Annual Net Usage Statistics are in. - 然后呢？ - 很难看 - And? - It's pretty ugly. 打从70年代以来就没看过这么难看的年使数 We haven't seen an ANUS this bad since the '70s. - 这代表何意？ - 不得不裁员了 - So, what does this mean? - We're gonna be laying off people. 我知道上周我迟到了 但我睡得不好 头发很乱 Listen, I know I came in late last week. I slept funny and my hair was snarly. 不是要裁你 Not you. 别紧张 Relax. 你有过开除员工的经验吗？ Ever have to fire anyone? 妮娜 Nina... 妮娜 Nina. 妮娜 Nina... 你还好吧？ Are you okay? 没事 Yes. Yes, I am. 这个呢 今天找你来呢 Uh, listen, the reason that I called you in here today was, uh... 拜托别恨我 Please don't hate me. 怎么了？ What? 今晚要共进晚餐吗？ Would you like to have dinner sometime? 菲比 你生日想要什么？ So, Pheebs, what do you want for your birthday? 真正想要我妈妈还在世 跟我一起庆祝 Well, what I really want is for my mom to be alive and enjoy it with me. 好吧 Okay. 这么说吧 要不要瑰珀翠高档身体用品？ Let me put it this way. Anything from Crabtree & Evelyn? - 浴盐不赖 - 好 那就好 - Bath salts would be nice. - Oh, okay. Good. 这是哪啊？ What is this place? 你说冷 我则想尿 窗户上有咖啡的图案 Look, you're cold, I have to pee, and there's coffee. 能坏到哪去呢？ How bad could it be? 有答案了 I think we have an answer. 她来干嘛？ What's she doing here? 这是上帝的旨意 要我们在家用餐别乱跑 This could be God's way of telling us to eat at home. - 她被瑞夫餐馆开除了吗？ - 昨晚我们去时… - Think she got fired at Riff's? - No, we were there last night. 她一直送箭鱼来 你有要去…？ She kept bringing swordfish. Are you gonna go? 等我们点餐再去 毕竟是跟她点 对吧？ I'll wait until we order. It's her, right? 很像是她 It looks like her. - 抱歉 - 怎样？ - Um, excuse me? - Yeah? 是我们啊 Hi, it's us. 对 是我啊 Right. And it's me. 你也在这里？ So you're here too? 跟你们一样啊 As much as you are. 该你了 Your turn. - 我们想点餐了 - 很好 - We know what we want. - Oh, that's good. - 两杯拿铁 - 一些饼干 - All we want is two caffe lattes. - And some biscotti cookies. 不赖啊 Good choice. - 绝对是她没错 - 对 - It's definitely her. - Yeah. 真难以置信 I can't believe you. 结果你还是无法开除她？ You still haven't told that girl she doesn't have a job yet? 你也没拆圣诞灯啊 Well, you still haven't taken down the Christmas lights. 恭喜喔 你刚找了个最难吵起来的话题 Congratulations. I think you found the world's thinnest argument. 我只是想等到适当时机 I'm just trying to find the right moment. 应该不难 因为你们现在交往 Oh, well, that shouldn't be so hard, now that you're dating. "亲爱的 你被开除了 不过上班前我们快快来一下如何" "Sweetheart, you're fired. But how about a quickie before I go to work?" - 嘿 - 嘿 - Hey. - Hey. 既然人都进来了 就不用再敲门了 Once you're inside, you don't have to knock anymore. 我来开 I'll get it. 黑考斯先生 Oh. Hi, Mr. Heckles. 你们又在弄了 You're doing it again. 我们什么都没弄啊 We're not doing anything. 我们只是坐着静静聊天而已 We're just sitting around talking quietly. 我天花板很吵 I can hear you through the ceiling. 我的猫睡不着 My cats can't sleep. 你根本没养猫啊 You don't even have cats. 我本来可能养的 I could have cats. 再见 黑考斯先生 Goodbye, Mr. Heckles. 我们会小声点 We'll try to keep it down. 菲比 可以帮个忙吗？ Phoebe, can you do me a favor? 试穿一下看合不合身 Try this on to make sure it fits. 我这辈子第一次收到的生日礼物 真的很… Oh, my first birthday present. Oh, this is really... 不是啦 这是送乌苏拉的 但我想你们一样身材 Oh, no, no. It's for Ursula. I just figured, you know, size-wise. 没问题 好 Oh. Sure. Yeah. 好 很合 Okay, it fits. - 你又要约她了吗？ - 对 冰上嘉年华 - Are you seeing her again tonight? - Yep, Ice Capades. 你们玩真的 Wow, this is serious. 我从没见过你肯为女朋友花钱 I've never known you to pay money for any kind of capade. 不知道 我就是喜欢她啊 I don't know. I like her. 她跟别人不同 她有某种特质 She's different. There's, uh, something about her... 让你迷上她 懂了 你喜欢她 很好 That you like. We get it. You like her. Great. 菲比 我事先问过你 你说没意见的啊 Hey, Phoebe, I asked you, and you said it was okay. 但现在有意见了 Well, maybe now it's not okay. 好吧 Okay. 但现在我对你有意见这事 很有意见了 Well, maybe now I'm not okay with it not being okay. 好吧 Okay. 快织 好女人 快织 Knit, good woman. Knit. Knit. 这边是克莱斯勒大楼 And that's the Chrysler Building right there. 哦 Oh. - 妮娜 - 道格拉斯先生 - Nina. - Mr. Douglas. 领带很正 Cool tie. 她还在 She's still here. 是 她还在 Yes. Yes, she is. 我不是有附纸条给你报告过 Didn't I memo you on this? 我开除她后 她的心理医师 法兰医师 See, after I let her go, uh, I got a call from her psychiatrist, Dr. Flanen... 发蓝医师 ...Dr. Flanan, Dr. Flan. 告知我 她对开除一事适应不良 And, uh, he informed me that she took the news rather badly. 还用了"非常激动"这样的字眼 In fact, he, uh, mentioned the word "frenzy." 少开玩笑了 她明明就很… You're kidding. She seems so... 没有 妮娜吗？她… Oh, no, no. Nina? She's: 要是你去问她 In fact, if you asked her now... 她对被开除一事完全没有印象了 ...she'd have no recollection of being fired at all. 太不可置信了 That's unbelievable. 却又很可信 And yet believable. 所以我决定 在确定她不会伤害自己 So I decided not to fire her again... 或其他人之前 不要再开除她一次 ...until I'm sure she will be of no threat to herself or others. 好吧 人对事情的反应 真的很难预料 I see. Hmm. You never really know what's going on inside a person's head. 所以才有心理学吧 老板 Well, I guess that's why they call it psychology, sir. 毕竟 这是生产的奇迹 For this, after all, is the miracle of birth. 请开灯 Lights, please. 这就是生产的过程 And that's having a baby. 下一周就是最后一堂课了 Next week is our final class. 苏珊 往前跑 Susan, go deep. 太了不起了 真是太了不起了 It's impossible. It's just impossible. 什么东西了不起？ What is, honey? 刚才那女人… What that woman... 的表现 ...did. 我才不要经历那种事 I am not doing that. Heh. 只要宝宝不生出来就好了 那就一切依旧 It'll have to stay in, that's all. Everything will be the same. - 只要不生出来 - 卡萝 亲爱的 - It'll just stay in. Ha, ha. - Carol, honey. Shh. - 会一切顺利的 - 你懂个屁 - Everything will be all right. - What do you know? 又不会有人跟你说 "那是你的鼻孔吗？" No one's saying to you, "Hi, is that your nostril? 可以把这肉块从这推出去吗？ Mind if we push this pot roast through it?" 卡萝 亲爱的 Carol, sweetie. 深呼吸吐气 Cleansing breath. 我知道这很吓人 但往远想一点 I know it's frightening. But big picture: 生产不过是那短短一天 The birth part is just one day... 等生完后 我们这辈子就成了人家的父母了 ...and when it's over, we'll all be parents for the rest of our lives. 这么辛苦不就是为了这点吗？ I mean, that's what this is all about, right? 对吧 罗斯？ Ross? 罗斯 Ross. 我要当爸爸了 I'm gonna be a father. - 你现在才想到吗？ - 我是知道会有个孩子 - This is just occurring to you? - I always knew I was having a baby. 只是一直没想到 孩子也会有我 I just never realized the baby was having me. 你可以办到的 Oh, you're gonna be great. 你怎么知道？ How could you say that? 我连叫马塞尔别吃浴室踏垫都没办法了 I can't even get Marcel to stop eating the bathmat. 要怎么养育小孩 How will I raise a kid? 科学家说… You know, Ross, some scientists are now saying... 猴子和小孩是不一样的 ...that monkeys and babies are actually different. - 去哪？ - 出去 - Where are you going? - Out. 跟谁？ With? 是的 Yes. 问你一件事 All right, can I just ask you one question? 你们有那个了吗？ Have you two, you know, like, you know? 就那个 You know? 有没？ Yet? 虽然这不干你事 Well, not that it's any of your business... 但还没 可以吗？ ...but no, we haven't, okay? 你是指做爱 对吧？ You meant sex, right? - 有空吧？ - 有 妮娜 怎么了？ - Do you have a sec? - Uh, sure, Nina. What's up? 不知道 过去几天 大家都躲着我 I don't know. For the past couple days, people have been avoiding me... 看到我表情都怪怪的 ...and giving me these really strange looks. 喔 可能是因为… Oh, well, uh, maybe that's because... 大家都嫉妒我们吧 ...they're, uh, jealous of us. 可能 Maybe. 但他们收走剪刀 就说不通了吧 But that doesn't explain why they keep taking my scissors. 或许是因为要给你加薪了 Uh, well, maybe that's, uh, because you're getting a big raise. - 有吗？ - 当然 有可能啊 - I am? - Sure. Why not? 天啊 你好棒 Oh, my God. You're amazing. 还不只呢 Oh, you don't know. 海伦 请记得布克邦德小姐加薪的事 文件要弄好 Helen, make sure we put through the paperwork on Miss Bookbinder's raise. 那还要把她精神病历送到人事处吗？ Still want her psychological profile sent to personnel? - 什么？ - 海伦有酗酒问题 - What? - Helen drinks. 愿意嫁给我吗？ Will you marry me? - 最后我全盘托出 - 她反应如何？ - Well, I ended up telling her everything. - Ooh. How'd she take it? 很好 除了钉书针 Pretty well. Except for the stapler thing. 小提示 要是遇到同样状况 Little tip. If you're ever in a similar situation... 手千万别放在桌上 ...never, ever leave your hand on the desk. 我应该知道怎么操作了 Okay, I think I get how to do this. 可以关掉吗？可以弄走吗？ Can we turn this off? Can we make them go away? 因为我看不下去 Because I can't watch. - 好了 菲比 关掉了 - 好 - Okay, Pheebs, they're gone. - Okay. - 你还好吗？ - 很好 - Are you all right? - Yeah. 对 就是… 乌苏拉那事 It's just, you know, this whole stupid Ursula thing. 菲比 问你一句 Okay, Pheebs, can I ask? 他跟她约会就真的有这么糟吗？ So he's going out with her. Is it really so terrible? 有 Um, yeah. 不是说她很坏什么的 I mean, I'm not saying she's evil or anything. 但她老是坏了我的好事 She's just, you know, always breaking my stuff. 我八岁时 不肯借她儿童厨具组 When I was 8, I wouldn't let her have my Judy Jetson Thermos... 她就把厨具扔到车底 ...so she threw it under the bus. 还有兰迪•布朗 And then there's Randy Brown... 他就… ...who was like... 你们有过青梅竹马般的男友吗？ Have you ever had a boyfriend who was like your best friend? - 没有 - 没 - No. - No. 他就是我青梅竹马的男友 Well, but that's what he was for me. 她却抢走他 And she, you know, kind of stole him away... 却让他心碎 ...and then broke his heart. 之后他再也不理我了 And then he wouldn't even talk to me anymore. 因为他说不想再看到跟我们一样的人 He didn't want to be around anything that looked like either one of us. 菲比 Oh, Pheebs. 我清楚乔伊不是我男友 或儿童厨具组 I mean, I know Joey's not my boyfriend or my Thermos... 或什么 但是… ...or anything, but... - 你不会失去他的 - 你要跟他谈开来 - You won't lose him. - You gotta talk to Joey. 对 好 Yeah, okay. 他不会懂你的想法 如果他知道你这么想 Come on. He doesn't know this stuff. If he knew how you felt... 他爱上她了啊 He's falling in love with her. 拜托 才不过交往一周 Oh, please. They've been going out a week. 连床都没上过 根本不算什么 They haven't even slept together yet. I mean, that's not serious. 好吧 Okay. 好 Oh. Okay. Oh. 噢 Oh. 有什么事吗？ Yeah, um, may we help you? 瑞秋 你干嘛啦？好冷喔 你到里头来好吗？ Rachel, what are you doing? It's freezing. Would you come inside? 不要 No, no, no. 是你叫我拆掉的 You wanted me to take them down... 那我就来拆啊 ...so I'm taking them down, okay? 瑞秋 Rachel! 没事 我没事 I'm okay. I'm okay. 黑考斯先生 Mr. Heckles? 黑考斯先生 帮帮我 Mr. Heckles, could you help me, please? 我就说吧 See, this is just the kind of thing I was talking about. # Friends.S01E17.1994.BluRay.1080p.x265.10bit.MNHD-FRDS.txt 前情提要 Previously on Friends: - 抱歉 - 菲比耶 - Excuse me, miss. - It's Phoebe. - 就这些吗？ - 她们是双胞胎 - Will that be all? - They're twins. 菲比是菲比 乌苏拉却很辣 Phoebe's Phoebe. Ursula's hot. - 这是送给乌苏拉的 - 是喔 很合适 - It's for Ursula. - Sure, yeah. Okay, it fits. 马塞尔 把遥控器还罗斯 Marcel, give Rossy the remote. 他怎么办到的？ How did he do this? 就乌苏拉啊 It's this whole stupid Ursula thing. 他是在跟她约会 但真有这么严重吗？ So he's going out with her. Is it really so terrible? - 我姐姐你不懂啦 - 你要跟乔伊谈谈了 - You don't know my sister. - Talk to Joey. - 他爱上了她了 - 你不会失去他的 - He's falling in love with her. - You won't lose him. 他们连床都没上 这不算什么 They haven't even slept together yet. That's not serious. 噢 是啊 Oh. Um, yeah. 有事吗？ May we help you? 瑞秋 Rachel! Rachel! 没事 I'm okay. I'm okay. 噢 噢 哦… Ow, ow, ow. Ow, ow, ow. 噢… Ow, ow, ow. Ow, ow, ow. 我们室友要拆圣诞灯 Uh, hi, uh, my friend was taking down our Christmas lights... 结果跌下阳台 好像伤到脚还是脚踝了 ...and she fell off the balcony and may have broken her foot or ankle. 天啊 到现在你们家圣诞灯还没拆？ My God, you still have your Christmas lights up? 填好后缴回来 Fill this out and bring it back. - 来吧 - 喔… - Okay. Here you go. - Ow, ow, ow. Ow, ow, ow. 好 Okay. Whew. 好了 All right. 名字 Name... 地址 ...address... 紧急时拨打电话 Okay. In case of emergency, call? 你 You. 真的？ Really? 对 Yeah. 你真好 Oh, that is so sweet. 我爱你 Oh, gosh. I love you. 保险 Okay, insurance? 打勾 我要理赔 Oh, yeah, check it. Definitely gonna want some of that. 你没有任何保险？ You don't have insurance? 为什么要有？这要花多少钱啊？ Why? How much is this gonna cost? 不知道 但光照X光就可能要几百块 I have no idea, but X-rays alone could be a couple hundred dollars. - 那要怎么办？ - 那就什么也办不了了 - What are we gonna do? - There's not much we can do. 不然用你的 Uh, unless I use yours. 不行 No, no, no, no, no. 等等 Well, now, wait a second. 刚才我紧急电话填谁？ Who did I just put as my "in case of emergency" person? 这是诈领保险金额 That's insurance fraud. 好吧 那就回家 Well, all right, then. Forget it. Might as well just go home. - 噢… - 好吧 - Ow, ow, ow, ow! - Okay, okay. - 好吧 过来 讨厌 - 谢谢 我爱你 - Okay, come here. I hate this. - Thank you. I love you. 给我一份新表格 Hi, heh. Um, I'm gonna need a new set of these forms. 为什么？ Why? 我好笨 I am really an idiot. 我帮我朋友填表格 You see, I was filling out my friend's form... 但却填错了 ...and instead of putting her information... 填成我自己的 ...I put mine. 你真笨 You are an idiot. 没错 我是 我真够笨的 Yep, that's me. Heh. I am that stupid. 昨晚我梦到自己跟儿子打美式足球 I had a dream last night where I was playing football with my kid. - 好甜蜜 - 真不错 - That's nice. - That's nice. 不 是把他当成球 No, no. With him. 我人在球场上 他们把小孩丢给我 I'm on this field, and they hike me the baby. 《坦帕湾队》的防守球员直朝我冲来 我非采取行动不可 I know I've gotta do something because the Tampa Bay defense is coming right at me. 《坦帕湾队》很差 Tampa Bay's got a terrible team. 是没错 但… Right, but... 我这队只有我和小孩 他们应该可以征服我们 ...it is just me and the baby, so I'm thinking they can take us. 所以我就… And so I, uh, heh... 把小孩扔到对方场地 I just heave it downfield. 你疯了不成？那是小孩子耶 What are you, crazy? That's a baby. 难不成要他被对方撞倒？ He should take the sack? 总之 突然间我来到对方场地 Anyway, suddenly I'm downfield. 这下换我要接住小孩了 对吧？ And I realize that I'm the one who's supposed to catch him, right? 但我根本不可能来得及 Only I know there's no way I'm not gonna get there in time. 所以我就一直跑 So I am running and I'm running... 这时我却醒来了 ...and that is when I woke up. 我真的还没准备好要当父亲 See, I am so not ready to be a father. 你没问题的 Hey, you're gonna be fine. 你是整个北美洲最细心最有责任感的男人 You're one of the most caring, responsible men in North America. 你会是好爸爸 You're gonna make a great dad. 对 罗斯 你和宝宝只需要有个好的阻挡 Yeah, Ross. You and the baby just need better blocking. 有人到过彩虹屋吗？很贵吗？ Oh. Have either of you ever been to the Rainbow Room? Is it expensive? 有叫餐的话 Only if you order stuff. 我今晚要带乌苏拉去 今天她生日 I'm taking Ursula tonight. It's her birthday. - 那菲比生日怎么办？ - 她什么时候生日？ - Whoa. What about Phoebe's birthday? - When's that? 呃 Uh... 今晚啊 ...tonight. 怎么这么巧？ Ugh, man, what are the odds of that happening? 你慢慢想 You take your time. 对喔 There it is. 你怎么打算？ So, what are you gonna do? 能怎么办？我不想搞砸和乌苏拉这边的事 What can I do? I don't want to screw it up with Ursula. 那你的朋友菲比就可以吗？ And your friend Phoebe? 是真的朋友就能谅解啊 你们不就会这样？ If she's my friend, hopefully she'll understand. Wouldn't you guys? 老兄 要是我生日 你给我搞这套 Man, if you tried that on my birthday... 那你准备看我发疯吧 ...you'd be staring at the business end of a hissy fit. 加一小撮番红花 会起很大作用 You add a pinch of saffron, it makes all the difference. 好 Okay, uh... - 摩妮卡 - 是 - Monica? - Yes? 对 是她 Yes, she is. - 嗨 这是我朋友瑞秋 - 嗨 - Hi. This is my friend Rachel. - Hi. 瑞秋 我是米契尔大夫 Hi, uh, Rachel, I'm Dr. Mitchell. 我是他朋友罗森大夫 And I'm his friend Dr. Rosen. 你这样当大夫 会不会太可爱了点？ Aren't you a little cute to be a doctor? 抱歉 Excuse me? 我是说年轻 God, young, young. I meant young, heh. 当大夫年轻了点 Young to be a doctor. - 说的好 瑞秋 - 谢谢 - Oh, good, Rach. - Thank you. 对 Right. 只是扭到 没什么 So he said it was just a sprain, and that was it. 有些蠢事你没说 Uh, you left out the stupid part. 不蠢啦 It's not stupid. 这两位师医生明晚要跟我们约会 我答应了 The very cute doctors asked us out for tomorrow night, and I said yes. 太疯狂了 他们可是在那家医院上班 I think it's totally insane. I mean, they work for the hospital. 这简直就像回到犯罪现场一样 It's like returning to the scene of the crime. - 我们别去约会了 - 什么？摩妮卡 他们又帅 - I say we blow off the dates. - What? Monica, they are cute. 又是医生 帅医生 是医生又很帅 They are doctors. Cute doctors. Doctors who are cute. 好 到目前 我们知道什么？ All right, what have we learned so far? 惊喜 Surprise! 你们搞什么啦？吓死我了 What the hell are you doing? You scared the crap out of me. - 那是蛋糕吗？ - 对 - Was that the cake? - Yeah. 我买了个柠檬烂糕 I got a lemon shmush. 别这样 她马上就到了 Come on. She'll be here any minute. 但愿没砸烂 I hope it's okay. "生日快乐 灰椅" "Happy Birthday, Peehee." 或许可以用玫瑰 写成 "B" 字 Maybe we can make a B out of one of those roses. 就用特制蛋糕工具 Yeah, we'll just use our special cake tools. - 怎么了？ - 我们只是… - Hey, what's going on? - Oh, we just... 惊喜 Surprise! 噢… Oh, oh, oh! 好棒喔 This is so great. 天啊 Oh, my God. 一点也不吓人 This was not at all scary. 各位 蓓蒂 Hi, everybody. Hi, Betty. 蓓蒂 Betty, hi. 你们找来蓓蒂 天啊 好棒 You found Betty. Oh, my gosh. This is so great. 我喜欢的人都聚在一堂 Everybody I love is in the same room. 乔伊呢？ Where's Joey? 看到蓓蒂吗？ Did you see Betty? 跟你说吧 我不介意投资生产蕃茄干产业 I tell you, I wouldn't mind having a piece of this sun-dried-tomato business. 五年前要是有人跟我说 我们可以让蕃茄变枣干 Five years ago, if somebody'd said to me, "Here's a tomato that looks like a prune"... 我会说 "给我滚出去" ...I'd have said, "Get out of my office." 爸 我出生前 你有很紧张吗？ Dad, before I was born, did you freak out at all? 我没紧张 我只是说… I'm not freaking out. I'm just saying... 要是有人来跟我说 ...if someone had come to me with the idea... 爸 我是在说 生小孩的事 Dad, Dad, Dad. I'm talking about the whole, uh, baby thing. 你有过那种... Did you, uh, ever get this sort of... 为人父恐慌症吗？ ...panicky, "Oh, my God, I'm gonna be a father" kind of a thing? 没 No. 你妈妈很尽责 我全心忙事业 Your mother really did the work. I was busy with the business. 我不常在家 I wasn't around that much. 你讲半天是要讲这个吗？ Is that what this is about? 不是啦 爸 我只是在想 No, no, Dad. I was just wondering. 还来得及弥补 我可以陪你做些事 There's time to make up for that. We can do stuff together. 你一直说想去威廉斯堡 就去那好了 You always wanted to go to colonial Williamsburg. How about we do that? 谢了 爸 Thanks, Dad. Really, heh. 我只是 You know, I just, I just... 我只是想弄清楚 I just needed to know, um... 你是何时才觉得自己已经当爸了 ...when did you start to feel like a father? 好像是你出生第二天 Oh. Well, I guess it must have been the day after you were born. 我和你妈妈在病房 你妈妈在睡觉 We were in the hospital room, your mother was asleep... 他们带你进房 让我抱着 ...and they brought you in and gave you to me. 你是个长得红红丑丑的东西 You were this ugly little red thing. 突然间 你用手拽了我手指一下 And all of a sudden, you grabbed my finger with your whole fist... 紧紧抓住 ...and you squeezed it... 抓得好牢 ...so tight. 那时我才醒悟 And that's when I knew. 那你不想去威廉斯堡吗？ So you don't want to go to Williamsburg? 可以啊 We can go to Williamsburg. 吃鱼吧 Eat your fish. 瑞秋 帅医生来了 Rachel, the cute doctors are here. 来了 Okay, coming. 请进 麦可 杰夫瑞 Hi, come on in. Hey, Michael, Jeffrey. - 嗨 - 嗨 - Hi. - Hi. 我们带了酒来 Uh, here, we brought wine. 这是波格奈酒庄的名酒 Look at this. It's from the cellars of Ernest and Tova Borgnine. - 怎么能不喝？ - 好棒 - So how could we resist? - Oh, that's great. - 摩妮卡 脚踝好吗？ - 就… - So, Monica, how's the ankle? - It's, uh... 你自己讲 Why don't you tell them? 毕竟脚踝长在你身上 After all, it is your ankle. 好多了 谢谢 You know, it's feeling a lot better. Thank you. 请坐 我们拿杯子 Listen, why don't you guys sit down, and we'll get you some glasses. - 好 - 好 - Okay. - Okay. - 嗯 - 马上 - Um... - Stat. 干脆把身份说清楚吧 Okay, listen, I'm thinking, why don't we just tell them who we really are? - 不会有事的 - 不可能 会惹祸上身 - I mean, I think it'll be fine. - It will not. We'll get in trouble. 摩妮卡 别这么没用好吗？ Monica, would you stop being such a wuss? 没用？我头脑清楚 有错吗？ A wuss? Excuse me for living in the real world. - 所以呢？ - 她们还是很正常 - So? - So they still seem normal. 因为她们本来就很正常 That's because they are. 承认吧 每次跟医院病人约会都… You have to admit, when we go out with women we meet at the hospital... 别穷紧张 你看看身边 Would you relax? Take a look around. 没有异教徒的圣坛 There are no pagan altars. 角落没堆人骨 No piles of bones in the corners. 她们没问题 跟我这样做 They're fine. Go like this: 不能那样好吗？你有时候真的太天真 I said we are not going to do it, okay? Sometimes you can be such a big baby. - 我才不天真 - 真的 - I am not a baby. - Be serious. - 是你穷紧张 - 你有公主病 - You get uptight... - You act like a princess. - 你知道怎样吗？ - 怎样啊？ - You know what? You know what? - What? What? 你越来越像你妈妈 Every day you are becoming more and more like your mother. 借过 来了 Excuse me. Hello, here we go. 这地方很棒 你们住多久了？ This is a great place. How long have you lived here? 谢谢 差不多六年 Thanks. I've been here about six years. 瑞秋前几个月才搬来的 And Rachel moved in a few months ago. 我本来要嫁人了 See, I was supposed to get married... 但临到圣坛才甩了人家 ...but, um, I left the guy at the altar. - 真的吗？ - 真的 - Really? - Yeah. 这是有点自私啦 不过… Yeah, I know it's pretty selfish, but, heh... 我就是这样啊 ...hey, that's me. 尝尝鹰嘴豆沙拉酱吧 Why don't you try the hummus? 摩妮卡 你是从事什么行业？ So, Monica, what do you do? 我是上流餐厅的大厨 Uh, I am a, uh, chef at a restaurant uptown. - 好厉害 - 没错 - Oh, good for you. - Yeah, it is. 因为我可以对人颐指气使 正好是我的嗜好 Mostly because I get to boss people around, which I just love to do. 沙拉酱好好吃 Well, this hummus is great. 天佑鹰嘴豆 God bless the chickpea. 天啊 Oh, God. 我真是被宠坏了 I am so spoiled. 没了 That's it. 我刚有说高中时 And by the way, have I mentioned that back in high school... 我胖得像猪吗？ ...I was a cow? 我以前会尿床 I used to wet my bed. 我用胸部吸引人 I use my breasts to get other people's attention. 我们都这样 We both do that. 摩妮卡和瑞秋住处 Monica and Rachel's apartment. 等等 瑞秋 是你爸 Uh... Uh, yeah, just one second. Uh, Rachel, it's your dad. 爸 Hi, Dad. 不 是我 No, no. It's me. 爸 现在不方便 Listen, Dad, I can't talk right now. Um... 有件事… But there's something, um... 我一直想跟你说 There's something that I've been meaning to tell you. 抱歉 Excuse me. 记得大一时 Remember back in freshman year? 比利•德端斯金和我在你们床上做爱 Well, Billy Dreskin and I had sex on your bed. 爸 Daddy... 爸 我怎么可能会跟比利•德瑞斯金上床？ Daddy... Daddy, why? Why would I sleep with Billy Dreskin? 他爸可是你工作上的死对头 His father tried to put you out of business. 你惨了 You are dead. 罗斯 他又拿到遥控器了 Ross, he's got the remote again. 好 Good. 或许他知道怎么转回来 Maybe he can switch it back. 或许不会 Maybe not. 喂 Hello? 是 Uh, ueah... Uh... 等等 我看她在不在 Okay, uh, hold on a second and let me just check and see if she's here. 医院的护士 她说表格有问题 It's the woman from the hospital. There's a problem with the form. 天啊 怎么办？ Oh, God, what do we do? 先问清什么事 I don't know. Just find out what they want. 你来问啦 Okay. No, you do it. 我是摩妮卡 Hello. This is Monica. 是？ Yeah? 哦 好 Oh. Okay. 我们马上过去 谢谢 Yes, we'll be right down. Thank you. 忘了签入院单 We forgot to sign one of the admissions forms. - 你说的对 不值得这样 - 谢谢 - Okay, you're right, this wasn't worth it. - Thank you. - 我去换衣服 - 好 - Okay, let me just change. - Yes. - 嘿 - 嘿 - Hey. - Hey. 有麻烦？ Trouble? 你姐姐前晚失约没到 Your sister stood me up the other night. 人家不支持感觉是不是很差？ Oh, no. Don't you hate it when people aren't there for you? - 有打给她看看吗？ - 打了两天 - Did you try calling her? - I've been trying for two days. 餐厅说她在忙 When I called the restaurant, they said she was too busy to talk. 没想到她就这样甩我 I can't believe she's blowing me off. 你好 Hey. 噢 Oh. 有空吗？ Um, you got a minute? 有啊 就工作没什么 Um, yeah, I'm just working. - 那… - 嗯？ - So... - Uh-huh? 送你生日礼物 Um, oh, I got you a birthday present. 你记得喔 Oh, wow, you remembered. 是儿童厨具组 Oh. It's a Judy Jetson Thermos. 就跟你… Right. Like the kind you... 对 Right. 我也有东西给你 Oh, I got something for you too. 你怎么知道我要来？ How'd you know I was coming? 就双胞胎的心电感应 Um, yeah, um, "twin" thing. 不敢相信你会这样 I can't believe you did this. 不敢相信你会… I can't believe you... 这样 ...did this. 你和乔伊怎么了？ So, what's the deal with, um, you and Joey? 对了 Oh, right. 他人很好 但我们结束了 He is so great. But that's over. - 他知情吗？ - 谁？ - Does he know? - Who? 乔伊 他对你很着迷 Joey. You know, um, ahem, he's really nutsy about you. 是吗？为什么？ He is? Why? - 问倒我了 - 是啊 - You got me. - Right. 抱歉 Excuse me... 这不是有附沙拉吗？ ...doesn't this come with a side salad? 你会打给他吗？ So, um, are you gonna call him? - 他有喜欢我吗？ - 不是啦 是乔伊 - What, you think he likes me? - No. Joey. 不会 他很聪明 他自己会想通的 Oh. No, no. He is so smart. He'll figure it out. 要吃鸡肉吗？ Do you want some chicken? 不了 不吃有脸的东西 记得吗？ No, no. No food with a face, remember? 你都没变 You have not changed. 对 你也一样 Yeah, you too. - 记得我们吗？ - 嗯 - Hi. Remember us? - Mm-hm. 你之前打来说 要签入院表格 Um, yeah, you just called about needing a signature on the admissions form? 我们想干脆重填 Well, it turns out we need a whole new one. 因为呢… Because, um, you see... 名字又写错了 ...I put the wrong name again. - 因为… - 你很笨 - Because, um... - You're that stupid. 对 我很笨 I am. I'm that stupid. 我用支票支付吧 Yeah, and I'm just gonna pay for this with a check. 这保险会给付 知道吧 You know, your insurance will cover that. 知道 只是我也不聪明 Yeah, I know. I'm just not that bright either. 好吧 最差的状况 Okay, worst case scenario: 如果说你从没觉得自己成了父亲 Say you never feel like a father. 而你的儿子从没觉得你是他父亲 Say your son never feels connected to you as one. 而他的人际关系 因此全受到影响 Say all of his relationships are affected by this. 你到底要讲什么？ Do you have a point? 应该有 You know, you'd think I would. 猴子是怎么了？ What's up with the simian? 有毛球 It's just a fur ball. 该谁了？ Okay, whose turn is it? 你 "肾脏" 我得43分 Yours. I just got 43 points for "kidney." 才没 你"恩脏"得零分 No, you got zero points for "idney." "K" 字母呢？ I had a K. Where's my K? 救命啊 猴子吞了一颗 "K" You've got to help me. My monkey swallowed a K. 猴子给我抱出去 Get that animal out of here. 请谅解 动物医院在城另一边 You don't understand. The animal hospital is way across town. 他噎到了 我不知如何是好 He's choking. I don't know what to do. - 怎么回事？ - 马塞尔把拼字牌吞下去了 - What's going on? - Marcel swallowed a Scrabble tile. 抱歉 这医院是医人的 Excuse me. This hospital is for people. 太太 他是人啊 他有名字耶 Lady, he is people. He has a name, okay? 他还会看电视 He watches Jeopardy... 没人注意时还会自慰 ...he touches himself when nobody's watching. 求求你大发慈悲 Please, have a heart. - 我来看看吧 - 谢谢 - I'll take a look at him. - Oh, thank you. - 麦可 - 瑞秋 - Michael. - Rachel. - 哈？ - 摩妮卡 - What? - Monica. - 哦 - 嗨 - Oh. - Hi. 嘿 Hey. 乌苏拉 Urs. 你来干嘛 我一直打给你 What are you doing here? I've been trying to call you. 这个 Listen, um... 别说这个 我认得这口气 我常用 Don't say "listen." I know that "listen." I've said that "listen." 抱歉 I'm sorry. 我不懂 怎么了？ I don't get it. What happened? 你在桥下说的话呢？ What about everything you said under the bridge? 对 Yeah, um, ahem... 忘了我在桥下说的事吧 You know, just forget about what I said under the bridge. 我醉了 讲的都是傻话 I was talking crazy that night. I was so drunk. 你不喝酒的 You don't drink. 没错 我不喝 That's right, I don't. 但我因为你而醉 But I was drunk on you. - 乌苏拉 - 但我们不可能有进展的 - Oh, Urs. - But, yeah, so it's not gonna work. 为什么？是因为我是菲比的朋友？ Why? Is it because I'm friends with Phoebe? 要是这个原因 你会愿意跟她绝交吗？ If it was, would you stop hanging out with her? 不行 No. 我办不到 No, I couldn't do that. 那么 就是因为菲比 Um, then, yeah, it's because of Phoebe. 这个 我跟她只能选一个 So you know, it's either her or me. 那 真的抱歉了 Then, uh... Then I'm sorry. 我呢… You know... 我很难忘得掉你 ...you're gonna be really, really hard to get over. 我懂 I know. 不知道是因为要分手 还是… I don't know whether it's just because we're breaking up or what... 但你从没这么美过 ...but you have never looked so beautiful. 真的吗？ Really? - 菲比？ - 是 - Pheebs? - Yeah. 好小一只喔 He looks so tiny. - 我们收到消息了 - 他没事吧？ - We just got the message. - Is he all right? 医生把牌拿出来了 Yeah, the doctor got the K out. 他还找到另两颗 He also found an M and an O. 我们猜他是想拼"猴子"这个字 We think he was trying to spell out "monkey." 医生说他不会有事 只是睡着了 The doctor says he'll be fine. He's just sleeping now. 所以 有当爸的感觉了吗？ So you feel like a dad yet? 没有 为什么？ No. Why? 你都撑过来了 做了该做的事 Hey, come on, you came through. You did what you had to do. 很有当爸的样子 That is very dad. 他醒了 Oh, look, he's waking up. 小朋友 你好吗？ Hey, fella. How you doing? # Friends.S01E18.1994.BluRay.1080p.x265.10bit.MNHD-FRDS.txt 瑞秋 我们这边只剩几张履历表了 Rach, we're running low on résumés over here. 你真的想去《大众机械杂志》做事？ Do you really want a job with Popular Mechanics? 要是想为机械工做点事 那倒是不错的选择 Well, if you're gonna work for mechanics, those are the ones to work for. 说真的 我现在什么都可以做了 好吗？ Hey, look, you guys. I'm going for anything here, okay? 我不想再当服务生了 真的 I can't be a waitress anymore. I mean it. 小费那么少 烦死了 而且大家都叫我"不好意思" I'm sick of the lousy tips. I'm sick of being called "Excuse Me." 瑞秋 你写完后 有没有检查？ Rach, did you proofread these? 有啊 怎么了？ Uh, yeah. Why? 没什么 你优秀的电"恼"能力 我相信大家都会印象深刻 Uh, nothing. I'm sure they'll be impressed with your excellent "compuper" skills. 我的天 Oh, my God! 每一张上面都写这样吗？ Oh, do you think it's on all of them? 不会啦 我相信影印机一定帮你抓到几个错误了 Oh, no, I'm sure the Xerox machine caught a few. - 大家好 - 嘿 - Hey, guys. - Hey. 嘿 两位小姐 Hey. Hi, ladies. 要点什么饮料？ Uh, can I get you anything? - 去拿信了吗？ - 一堆回信 - Did you bring the mail? - Lots of responses. 真的吗？当然还有司康松糕罗 Really? Sure we have scones left. 好 念给我听 Okay, read them to me. "亲爱的葛林小姐: 谢谢您的申请 不过…" "Dear Miss Green: Thank you for your inquiry. However..." - 我们有苹果肉挂… - 好 "亲爱的葛林小姐"… - We have apple cinnamon... - Okay, "Dear Miss Green"... 好 好 好 不行 Yeah. Yeah, yeah. No. - 哇 - 什么啊？ - Wow. - What? 你的卡债还真多 Your Visa bill is huge. 拿来 Give me that. 我真不敢相信 琳达这么可爱 You know, I can't believe you. Linda is so great. - 你为什么不约她出去？ - 不知道 - Why won't you go out with her again? - I don't know. 你是不是还在想… Is this still about her whole... 她说的"《摩登原始人》有可能是真的"？ ..."The Flintstones could have really happened" thing? 不只是那样 It's not just that. 我只是想要一个能让我心动… It's just, I want someone who does something for me... 让我小鹿乱撞… ...you know, who gets my heart pounding... 让我… ...who makes me, uh... 身上穿毛衣的小东西？ Little play things with yarn? 什么啊？ What? 还有人更让你心动的吗？ Could you want her more? 谁？ Who? 还有谁？就是肥皂剧里那个女生啊 Who? Dee, the sarcastic sister from What's Happening!! 谁啊？ Who? 说真的 我对她完全没有感觉了 好吗？ Look, I am totally, totally over her, okay? - 我只是… 嘿 - 嘿 还要咖啡吗？ - I just... Hi. - Hi. Coffee? - 不了 这样就好 - 好 - No, we're fine. - Okay. 闭嘴 Shut up. 我们什么都没说哦 We're not saying anything. - 什么啊？ - 乔伊昨晚哭了 - What? - Uh, Joey cried last night. 谢谢哦 Thank you. 我们不是在玩牌吗？ We were playing poker, right? 3号牌上有巧克力 所以看起来像8好吗？ There was chocolate on the three. It looked like an eight, all right? 应该让你们看看 《看着看着就哭了》 Oh, God, you should've seen him. "Read them and weep." 他也照办了 And then he did. 你们怎么从来不跟我们玩牌？ Well, now, how come you guys have never played poker with us? 对啊 怎么回事？就是只有男生能玩吗？ Yeah, what is that? Like some kind of guy thing? 就是只有性别歧视的男生能玩吗？ Like some kind of sexist guy thing? 扑克牌只有男生能玩啊？ Like, it's poker, so only guys can play? 我们也很欢迎女生玩 No. Women are welcome to play. 哦 那怎么了？ Oh, okay, so then what is it? 就是… 就是… Some kind of, you know, like, some kind of, you know, like... 好吧 到底是怎样？ All right, what is it? 就只是刚好我们玩牌时 没有女人 There just don't happen to be any women in our game. 对啊 我们不认识会玩扑克牌的女人 Yeah, we just don't happen to know any women that know how to play poker. 拜托 烂借口 标准的男生答案 Oh, please. That is such a lame excuse. I mean, it's a typical guy response. 不好意思 你们当中有人会玩吗？ Excuse me, do any of you know how to play? 不会 No. 但是你们可以教我们 But you could teach us. 不要 No. 好 现在我们抽牌 Okay, so now we draw cards. 我这样不需要再抽了吧？我有顺子 So I wouldn't need any, right? Because I have a straight. - 太好了 - 恭喜你 - Oh, good for you. - Congratulations. 好 菲比 你要几张？ Okay, Pheebs, how many do you want? 我要两张 黑桃10跟梅花6 Okay, I just need two. The 10 of spades and the six of clubs. 不行 菲比 不可以这样 No, uh, Pheebs, you can't do that. 我有黑桃10 你要不要？ I have the 10 of spades. Here, you want it? 谢谢 Thanks. 不行 不可以这样子 Uh, no, see, uh, you can't do that. 没关系 我不需要这张牌 我要四张四 No, no. That's okay. I don't need them. I'm going for fours. 啊 你在… Oh, you're... 好 上菜了 All right, here we go. 这是鲑鱼轮盘跟什锦生菜棒 We've got salmon roulettes and assorted crudités. 摩妮卡 你在干什么？ Whoa, whoa, whoa. Monica, what are you doing? 我们在玩扑克牌 只能吃垃圾零食 This is a poker game. You can't serve food with more than one syllable. 像洋芋片 蝴蝶脆饼… It's got to be like chips or dip or pretz... 好 现在庄家… Okay, so at this point, the dealer... 这样好了 开始玩真的吧 我们会了 高风险 玩真钱 You know what? We got it. We got it. Let's play for real. High stakes. Big bucks. 你确定吗？菲比刚丢出两张J… All right, now, you sure? Phoebe just threw away two jacks... 因为它们看起来很不快乐 ...because they didn't look happy. 但是我可以玩了 发牌吧 But I'm ready. So just deal. 好 最后一课 最后一课 乔伊 Okay, all right, last minute lesson. Last minute lesson. Joey. \N 3\NThree... \N 8\N...eight. 8 3 好 可以开始了 Eight, three. All right. Here we go. 该死 该死 该死 Damn it, damn it, damn it. 我知道了 原来你是在说谎 I see. So then, um, you were lying. - 说什么谎？ - 说你的牌有多好 - About what? - About how good your cards were. 那叫做唬人 Heh. I was bluffing. 那"唬人"是什么？ Aha. And what is "bluffing"? 不就是说谎吗？ Is it not another word for lying? 好了 很抱歉要终止这场派对 Okay, sorry to break up this party... 但是我得在明天上班前把履历表发出去 ...but I've got resumes to fax before work tomorrow. - 哇哦… - 瑞秋 我们得定局 - Whoa, whoa, whoa. - Rach, we've got to settle. 定什么局？ Settle what? 为维吉尼亚州 詹姆士镇的殖民地下定局 The Jamestown colony of Virginia. 那块地是乔治国王要给我们的… You see, King George is giving us the land, so... 瑞秋 这场牌局 这局你欠我们钱 The game, Rachel. The game. You owe us money for the game. 对哦 Oh, right. 这样吧 这是她们第一次玩牌 我们就算了好不好？ You know what, guys? It's their first time. Why don't we forget about the money? 才不要 我们会付的 Hell, no. We'll pay. 好吧 摩妮卡 我已经准备好另一个答案 Okay, Monica, I had another answer all ready. 这样好了 And you know what? - 我们再来一场 - 我没问题 - We want a rematch. - Well, that's fine with me. 我有钱 Could use the money. 基本上 你们就是靠从朋友那边赢钱来过瘾的 So, basically, you get your ya-yas by taking money from all of your friends. - 没错 - 对 我靠去宜家过瘾 - Yeah. - Yes, and I get my ya-yas from lkea. 家具得自己组装 但是便宜一点 You have to put them together yourself, but they cost a little less. 瑞秋 我玩扑克牌的目的就是想赢 好吗？ Look, Rachel, this is poker. I play to win, all right? 我要赢 别人就得输 In order for me to win, other people have to lose. 你要跟我玩扑克牌 就别指望我当好好先生 So if you're gonna play poker with me, don't expect me to be a nice guy. 因为一发牌… Okay, because once those cards are dealt... 怎样？ Yeah? 我就不是好好先生 I'm not a nice guy. 好了 大家来吃吧 All right, boys. Let's eat. 你在"我爱瑞秋"披萨店买的吗？ Ah, did you get that from the "I Love Rachel" pizzeria? - 你还在想那个？ - 拜托 - You still on that? - Come on. 那场"我是坏男人"演讲 是怎么回事？ What was with that whole Black Bart speech? "我一玩扑克牌 就不是好好先生" "When I play poker, I'm not a nice guy". 老兄 完全搞错了 You're way off, pal. 我可不这么认为 罗斯 我认为你爱她 No, I don't think so. See, Ross, because I think you love her. 没有 Uh, no. 我对她有过好感 那都过去了 See, I might have had feelings for her at one time. Not anymore. 我只是… 马塞尔 I just... Marcel. 你拿那片CD干什么？不可以再放了 Where are you going with that disk? You are not putting that on again. 马塞尔… 好 敢按下那个键 你就完蛋 Marcel... Okay. If you press that button, you are in very, very big trouble. 真不敢相信 罗斯居然那么浑蛋 You believe what a jerk Ross was being? 对啊 他还真是好胜 Yeah, I know. He can get really competitive. 干嘛啊？ What? 摩妮卡 你是五十步笑百步吧 Oh. "Hello, Kettle, this is Monica. You're black." 拜托 Please. 我没有像罗斯那么糟 I am not as bad as Ross. 抱歉 我看不出差别 记得比手画脚事件吗？ Oh, I beg to differ. The Pictionary incident? 那不是什么事件 That was not an incident. 我正在比手画脚 盘子就溜出去了 I was gesturing and the plate slipped out of my hand. 哦 Oh. - 我有面试 我有面试了 - 真的吗？哪里？ - Oh! I got an interview. I got an interview. - You're kidding. Where? Where? - 萨克斯百货公司 第五大街 - 哇 瑞秋 - Saks Fifth Avenue. - Oh, Rachel. 这就好像母船来召你回家乡了 Oh, it's like the mother ship is calling you home. - 是什么样的职位？ - 助理采购人员 - Well, what's the job? - Assistant buyer. 我可以靠血拼… Oh! I would be shopping... 吃饭 ...for a living. 好 爱瑞丝阿姨来了 Okay, look. That's Aunt Iris. 她5岁就开始玩扑克牌了 This woman has been playing poker since she was 5. 她说的每一个字都要注意听 You've gotta listen to every word she says. - 你好 - 喜剧泰斗东尼•蓝道死了吗？ - Hi. - Is Tony Randall dead? - 怎么会？ - 我没听说 - Oh, why? - I don't think so. 他可能已经死了 我好像刚刚开车撞到他 Well, he may be now because I think I hit him with my car. - 我的天 真的吗？ - 假的 第一课 这就是唬人 - My God. Really? - No, that's bluffing. Lesson number one. 告诉你们吧 Let me tell you something. 在扑克牌桌上听到的 通通不可以当真 Everything you hear at a poker game is pure crap. - 好漂亮的耳环 - 谢… - Nice earrings. - Thank you. 各位小姐 坐下 Girls, sit down. - 爱瑞丝阿姨 这是菲比 瑞秋… - 好了 好了… - Um, Aunt Iris, this is Phoebe, and Rachel... - Yeah, yeah, yeah. 我们开始吧 这里停车要计时收费 Listen, I am parked at a meter. Let's do it. 罗斯 拜托 我们能不能听点别的？ Ross, could we please, please, listen to anything else? 好啦 All right. 今晚我完蛋了 I'm gonna pay for that tonight. - 嗨 - 你好 - Hi. - Hey. 你们猜 你们猜 你们猜 Guess what, guess what, guess what. 嗯 第五个牙医投降了 他们开始推荐薄荷口香糖了？ Uh, okay. The fifth dentist caved, and now they're all recommending Trident? 不是 是我的面试 No, the interview. 她好喜欢我 超级喜欢我 She loved me. She absolutely loved me. 我们谈了两个半小时 我们的衣着品味相同 We talked for, like, two and a half hours. We have the same taste in clothes. 我跟她表妹还去过同一个夏令营 Oh, I went to camp with her cousin. 这工作太完美了 我可以做得很好 一定可以 And, oh, the job is perfect. I can do this. I can do this well. 太好了 That's great. 而且她的故事超好笑的 God. And she told the funniest story. 好极了 你说出来 我们一定会笑的 Okay, great, you'll tell us and we'll laugh. 开始玩扑克牌吧 Let's play poker. 好 我们谈过了… All right, listen, we talked about it... 如果你们不想玩 我们可以理解 ...and if you don't want to play, we completely understand. 对 我们可以玩别的 像是 不知道… Yes, yes. We can play some other game. Like, I don't know... 比手画脚？ ...Pictionary? 很好笑 很好笑 Very funny. Very funny. 我们再给扑克牌一次机会吧 好吗 两位小姐？ I think we'd like to give poker another try. Shall we, ladies? 好啊 没问题 Yes, I think we should. 你要我洗牌吗？ Rach, do you want me to shuffle those? 不用了 没关系 我来试试看吧 No, no. That's okay. You know what? I'm gonna give it a go. - 好 - 好 - All right. - All right. 菲比欠7块5 摩妮卡 你欠10块 So Pheebs owes 7.50. Monica, you owe $10. 瑞秋 你欠15块 And, Rachel, you owe 15 big ones. 谢谢你教我们唱《斗鸡眼玛莉》 Thanks for teaching us "Crossed-eyed Mary." 那个我们一定要放出来的 You guys, we gotta play that other way. 7块5拿去 你们要知道 这钱被诅咒了 All right, here's my 7.50, but I think you should know that this money is cursed. - 什么？ - 哦 诅咒是我下的 - What? - Oh, I cursed it. 不管是谁花掉的 都会有倒霉的事发生 So now bad things will happen to he who spends it. 没关系 给我吧 反正我一直都很倒霉 That's all right, I'll take it. Bad things happen to me anyway. 这样我就可以用电影解除咒语 This way, I can break them up with a movie. 现在只剩下葛林扑克牌机 她欠我们15块 So that just leaves the big Green poker machine, who owes 15. 真是标准的… Hmm, oh, it's so typical: "我是个男人 我是带把的" "Ooh, I'm a man. Ooh, I have a penis. "我就是要赢钱 来显示出驾驭女性的权力" Ooh, I have to win money to exert my power over women." 你们知道吗？我们还没玩完 You know what? This is not over. 我们会再来找你们 我们会赢 你们会输 We will play you again. And we will win and you will lose. 你们会求饶 我们会讥笑你们 And you will beg and we will laugh. 你们所有的钱都会被我们赢光 And we will take every last dime you have. 然后再一辈子痛恨你们自己 And you will hate yourselves forever. 你把我想讲的话都说光了 摩妮卡 Hmm. Kind of stepped on my point there, Mon. 钱你们要现在付吗？ So you gals wanna hand over your money now? 这样我们就可以直接跳过玩牌的仪式 That way, we don't have to go through the formality of actually playing. 没关系 我们来看看最后笑的人是谁 猴孩子 No, that's fine. We'll see who has the last laugh there, monkey boy. 聊天聊完了没有？要不要认真打牌啊？ Okay, are we done with the chitchat? Are we ready to play serious poker? 大家快看 单眼杰克的眼睛一直跟着我 Hey, you guys, look. The one-eyed jack follows me wherever I go. 好 好好打一场扑克牌 Right, okay. Serious poker. 不好意思 你要去哪里？ Excuse me. Where are you going? 上厕所 Uh, to the bathroom. 你是来上厕所 还是来玩扑克牌的？ Do you wanna go to the bathroom or do you wanna play poker? 我想上厕所 I wanna go to the bathroom. - 好 我打电话叫披萨外卖 - 不行 不行 不行 - All right, well, I'm gonna order a pizza. - Oh, no, no, no. 我在等那工作的面试结果 I'm waiting to hear from that job. 百货公司9点关 你那时候再吃吧 And the store closes at 9, so you can eat then. 没关系 我吃薄荷糖先垫肚子 That's fine. I'll just have a Tic Tac to hold me over. 好 辛辛那提玩法 不下盲注 大家先下注 All right. Cincinnati. No blinds. Everybody ante. 好 Yes. 不好 Or no. 好 All right. 你的钱就是我的 葛林 Your money's mine, Green. 你的拉链开着 盖勒 Your fly's open, Geller. 你们知道我刚想到什么吗？ You guys, you know what I just realized? 杰克跟扑克只差一个字 "Joker" is "poker" with a "J." 很巧吧？ Coincidence? 所以我们也可以叫这"杰"克牌 Hey, that's "jo-incidence" with a "C." - 菲比 菲比 - 我不跟了 - Uh, Phoebe. Phoebe... - Yeah, I'm out. 我跟 I'm in. 我也跟 Me too. 我也跟 好 你是什么牌？ Me too. All right. What do you got? 你最好离莲蓬头远一点 因为我要出同花牌了 Well, you better hop out of the shower, because I got a flush. 呵 呵 呵 Well, well, well. 小子 别想逃 我有4张6 Hop back in, bucko, because I got four sixes. 我有4张6 我赢了 我真的赢了 I got four sixes. I won. I actually won. 天啊 你们知道吗？我要把小罗斯叠成一堆 Oh, my God. You know what? I think I'm gonna make a little Ross pile. 这是罗斯的 这也是罗斯的 I think that one was Ross'. And I think, oh, that one was Ross'. 你的钱是我的了 你一辈子都看不到了 Well, I have got your money. And you'll never see it. 你裤子的拉链还是开着 And your fly's still open. 你相信了 I made you look. - 我跟 - 怎么可能不跟 - I'm in. - I couldn't be inner. 摩妮卡？摩妮卡 你跟不跟？ Monica? Monica, in or out? 我讨厌扑克牌 I hate this game. 好 乔伊 换你下注了 Okay, Joey, your bet. 我不来了 就像一个廉价妓女… I fold, like a cheap hooker who got hit in the stomach... 被一个脸上流脓的胖子揍到肚子一样 ...by a fat guy with sores on his face. 不跟了 Oh, I'm out. - 罗斯？ - 当然跟 - Ross? - Oh, I'm very in. - 钱德呢？ - 怎么可能跟？ - Chandler? - Couldn't be more out. 我也不跟 喘秋呢？ Me too. Rachel? 我不但跟 而且还加注 Um, I will see you and I'll raise you. 如何？想再浪费钱吗？ What do you say? You wanna waste another buck? 不了 这次不会 No, not this time. - 你的是什么牌？ - 不告诉你 - So, what did you have? - I'm not telling. - 别这样 给我看看 - 不要 - Come on, show them to me. - No. - 给我看看 亮牌吧 - 手拿开 不要 - Show them to me. Let me see. - Get your hands out of there. 我有过这样的约会经验 You know, I've had dates like this. 老天 你就是输不起 对不对？ Boy, you really can't stand to lose, can you? 你整个脸都涨红了 Your whole face is getting red. 太阳穴的青筋也爆出来了 Little veins popping out of your temple. 而且上衣跟裤子也不搭 Plus that shirt doesn't really match those pants. 首先 我没有输 First of all, I'm not losing. - 发牌吧 - 喂？我就是瑞秋•葛林 - Just deal. - Hello? Rachel Green. 请稍等一下 Excuse me. 这是有关工作的 It's about the job. 芭芭拉吗？你好 Barbara, hi. How are you? 唔？ Uh-huh? 我了解 No, I understand. 喔 没关系 我很好 别傻了 Yeah, oh, come on. No, I'm fine. Don't be silly. 如果还有什么空缺 请… Yeah. Oh, but you know, if anything else opens up, please... 喂？ Hello? 嗯 Hmm. 我很遗憾 瑞秋 Sorry, Rach. 对啊 一定会有别的机会出现 Yeah, you know, there's gonna be lots of other stuff. 是啊 Yeah. Okay. 我们玩到哪儿了？好 Where were we? Oh. Okay. 五张牌 11点或更高的 Five card draw. Uh, jacks are better. 没有万能牌 大家下注吧 Nothing wild, everybody ante. 瑞秋 我们不用再玩下去了 Look, Rach, we don't have to do this. 当然要继续玩 Yes, we do. - 好 下注 - 下注 - All right. Check. - Check. 我下5角钱 I'm in for 50 cents. - 我跟 - 我跟 - Call. - I'm in. 我跟你5角钱 I see your 50 cents... 然后加注… ...and I raise you... 5块钱 ...$5. 我以为我们有5角钱上限 I thought, uh, it was a 50-cent limit. 我刚刚失去一份工作 我想加注5块钱 Well, I just lost a job, and I'd like to raise the bet 5 bucks. 有人有问题吗？ Does anybody have a problem with that? - 完全没有 - 没有 没有 - Not at all. - No, no. 输家呢？ Loser? 不了 我退出 No, I fold. 什么叫你退出？少来 这是干嘛？ What do you mean, you fold? Hey, come on, what is this? 我还以为 "一发牌 我就不是好好先生" I thought that, "Once the cards are dealt, I'm not a nice guy." 怎么？你只会说大话而已吗？ I mean, what? Were you just full of it? 我跟 I'm in. - 你要几张？ - 1张 - How many you want? - One. 庄家两张 Dealer takes two. - 你下多少？ - 我下2块钱 - What do you bet? - I bet $2. 好 Okay. 我跟你的2块钱 See your 2... 然后加注… ...and I raise you... - 20 - 哇 - ...20. - Wow. 我跟你的20块钱… I see your 20... 然后加注25块 ...raise you 25. 我跟你的25块钱… See your 25... 摩妮卡 把我的皮包拿来 ...and, uh, Monica, get my purse. 瑞秋 里面没钱了 Rachel, there's nothing in it. 好 那就把你的拿来 Okay, then get me your purse. 好 拿去吧 祝你好运 Okay. Here you go. Good luck. 谢谢 Thank you. 我跟你的25块钱 然后加注… I saw your 25 and I raise you... 7块钱 ...7. 乔伊 我囊中羞涩了 Joey, I'm a little shy. 没关系 罗斯 想问什么尽管问 That's okay, Ross. You can ask me. - 你需要多少？需要多少？ - 15块 - What do you need? What do you need? - Fifteen. - 好 这里有10块 - 我有5块 5块钱 - All right, here's 10. - Here, I got 5, I got 5. - 谢谢 - 祝你好运 - Thank you. - Good luck. 好 追加17块 Okay, I am calling your 17. 亮牌吧 What do you got? 葫芦 Full house. 你赢了 You got me. 噢 Oh! - 没关系 那很难赢 - 我以为我们赢定了 - That's a tough hand to beat. - I thought we had them. 没有好牌就是没有好牌 能怎么办？ Well, when you don't have the cards, you don't have the cards, you know? 但是你们看她有多高兴 But look how happy she is. - 航空信 - 飞机？机场 - Airmail. - Airplane. Airport. 《75空难》《航爆死亡角》《惊爆九重天》 Airport '75. Airport '77. Airport '79. 时间到 Time's up. 《枭巢扫荡战》 Bye Bye Birdie. 那是鸟吗？ That's a bird? 那是鸟 That's a bird. 好 换我了 Okay, okay, it's my turn. 开始 Go. 豆子？ Uh, Bean. Bean. - 《布拉格的春天》 - 答对了 - The Unbearable Lightness of Being. - Yes! 这你都懂？ That you get? # Friends.S01E19.1994.BluRay.1080p.x265.10bit.MNHD-FRDS.txt 好 我查过了 Okay, okay, I checked. 我们有伯爵茶 英式早餐茶 肉桂茶… We have Earl Grey, English Breakfast, cinnamon stick... 洋菊茶 薄荷花草茶 黑莓茶… ...chamomile, mint medley, blackberry and, uh... 等等 还有一种… 柠檬花草茶 Oh, wait, there's one more, um... Lemon soother. 点茶的人不是你 对不对？ You're not the guy that asked for the tea, are you? 好吧 Okay. 第七床的瑞秋•葛林 你的信件 Mail call. Rachel Green, bunk seven. 谢谢 Thank you. 酷 免费咖啡试饮包 Oh, cool. A free sample of coffee. 真好 不然的话 我们要去哪里索取？ Oh, good, because where else would we get any? Ha, ha. 对哦 Oh, right. - 这可好了 - 那是什么？ - Oh, great. - What is it? 乡村俱乐部的新闻信 Country club newsletter. 我妈妈为了激励我 专门送这种订婚消息来 My mother sends me the engagement notices for inspiration. 噢 天啊 Oh, my God. 噢 天啊 是巴瑞和敏蒂 Oh, my God. It's Barry and Mindy. - 巴瑞 你差点就…？ - 我差点就… - Barry, who you almost...? - Barry, who I almost... - 敏蒂 你的伴娘… - 我的伴娘… - Mindy, your maid of... - My maid of... 我看一下 那就是敏蒂？ Let me see. That's Mindy? 哇 好漂亮 Wow, she is pretty. 她很幸运… Lucky... 有你这样的朋友 ...to have had a friend like you. 马塞尔 把饭拿过来给我 快点 把饭拿过来 Marcel, bring me the rice. Come on, bring me the rice. Come on. 好孩子 好孩子 过来 拿饭给我 Good boy. Good bye. Come here, give me the rice. 谢谢你 好孩子 Thank you. Good boy. 我看他总算了解 "拿过来"… Well, I see he's mastered the difference between "bring me the"... 跟"尿在里面"的分别了 ...and "pee in the." "拿过来" 和… 瑞秋？ "Bring me the" and... Rach? - 什么事？ - 你好 - What? - Hi. 对不起 Oh, I'm sorry. Oh. 我真傻 This is so stupid. - 是我甩掉巴瑞的 不是吗？ - 嗯 - I mean, I gave Barry up, right? - Mm. 我应该为他们高兴 I should be happy for them. 我是为他们高兴 I am. I'm happy for them. - 真的吗？ - 假的 - Really? - No. 我想 要是我身边有了别人 感觉就不一样了 Oh. Oh, I guess it would be different if I were with somebody. 什么…？ Whoa, what, uh, ha, ha... 你不是说过 "我不要再谈恋爱了" What happened to, uh, "Forget relationships. "男人烦死了"？你的小鸟禁令呢？ I'm done with men"? The whole, uh, penis embargo? 嗯 不确定 Oh, I don't know. 我想应该不能说是完全不要男人 I guess it's not about no guys. - 而是要找到对的男人 你知道吗？ - 唔 - It's about the right guy, you know? - Hmm. 跟巴瑞在一起 感觉很安全安逸 但是没有火花 With Barry, it was safe and it was easy, but there was no heat. - 嗯 - 跟巴洛… - Mm. - You know, with Paolo... 除了火花 没有别的 ...that's all there was, was heat. 说真的 就是那种活生生的 野性 感官的… And I mean, it was just this raw, animal, sexual... 好 好 我了解 Right, right. I got it. 当时我在旁边 I was there. 你觉得有没有可能两者兼有？ I mean, do you think you can ever have both? 你知道吗？他同时是你最好的朋友… You know? Someone who's like your best friend... 但是也让你小鹿乱撞 ...but then also can make your toes curl. 了解 了解 Yes, yes. 真的 我完全了解 Yes. Yes, I do. I really do. 其实 好玩的是… Uh, in fact, it's funny. 通常你认为不会让你… Very often, someone who you wouldn't think could... 小鹿乱撞的人… ...curl your toes... 可能就是那个… ...might just be the one who... 嗨 Hi. 被打断了 嗨 Gets interrupted. Hi. 大家好 电影好看吗？ Hey, guys, how was the movie? - 太棒了 - 非常好看 - Oh, so wonderful. - Oh, it was so good. - 烂到爆 - 只有女生才会去看 - Suck fest. - Total chick flick. 很抱歉那不是那种… I'm sorry it wasn't one of those movies... 有枪有炮… ...with, like, you know, like, guns and bombs... 或是巴士开超快的电影 ...and, like, buses going really fast. 喂 我喜欢的电影不一定要有暴力… Hey, I don't need violence to enjoy a movie... 只要有一些裸露镜头就够了 ...just so long as there's a little nudity. - 有裸露镜头啊 - 我是说女性的裸露镜头 - There was nudity. - I meant female nudity. 好 我不想看路•葛兰有前戏 All right, I don't need to see Lou Grant frolicking. 休 休•葛兰 Hugh. Hugh Grant. 好 我该走了 All right, I've got to go. Ahem. 过来 马塞尔 过来 Come on, Marcel. Come on. 我们要去洗澡 对不对？ Yeah, we're gonna go take a bath. 对啊 我们要洗澡哦 好不好？ Yes, we are, aren't we? Yes, we are. 他们仍然只是朋友吧？ They're still just friends, right? 我们明天见 And I will see you tomorrow. 没错 明天你要来瑞秋阿姨这边 对不对？ That's right. You're gonna spend tomorrow at Aunt Rachel's, aren't you? 等一下 等一下 摩妮卡阿姨有没有权利说话？ Hang on, hang on. Does Aunt Monica get a say in this? 拜托啦 摩妮卡阿姨 好不好？ Please, Aunt Monica, please? Ha, ha. 拜托 放轻松 明天你根本就不在 Oh, unclench. You're not even gonna be here. 真不敢相信我们居然在讨论这种事 I can't believe we're having this discussion. 同意 我也不敢相信 I agree. I'm, like, in disbelief. 你不觉得你跟瑞秋如果能在一起 早就在一起了？ Don't you think if things were gonna happen with Rachel, they would've happened? 我告诉你们 她说她想要跟… I'm telling you, she said she's looking for a relationship... 像我这样的人谈恋爱 ...with someone exactly like me. 她真的这么说？ She really said that? "像我这样的人" 是我自己加的 Well, I added the "exactly like me" part. 但是她说她在找个好男人 好男人今晚就会出现了 But she said she's looking for someone. And someone is gonna be there tonight. "今晚"？你是说真的？ "Tonight" tonight? 我想这一定会很完美 就只有我们两个 Well, I think it's perfect. It's just gonna be the two of us. 她整天都在照顾我的猴子 She spent all day taking care of my monkey. 我不记得上次有女生照顾我的猴子是什么时候的事了 I can't remember the last time I got a girl to take care of my monkey. 反正 下班后 我去买一瓶酒… Anyway, you know, I figured after work, I'd go pick up a bottle of wine... 然后过去开始追求她 ...go over there and, uh, try to woo her. 你知道你应该怎么做吗？ Hey, you know what you should do? 你应该带她回19世纪末 当时还有人使用那种字眼 You should take her back to the 1890s when that phrase was last used. 如果你坚持下去… If you keep this up... 不到周末 那个浑蛋就玩完了 ...you'll be finished with this sucker by the end of the week. 那个围着羽绒围巾的是法兰西斯医生 Now, the one in the feathered boa, that's Dr. Francis. 她以前是个男人 Now, she used to be a man. 你看 那是瑞文 我们讨厌她 Oh, look. See, now, there's Raven. We hate her. 很高兴她快死了 We're glad she's dying. 然后… 怎么了？马塞尔 And then... What? Marcel. 你在玩摩妮卡阿姨的鞋子吗？你知道你不可以… Are you playing with Monica's shoes? You know you're not supposed to... 哇哦… Whoa, whoa. 马塞尔 你大便在鞋子里？ Marcel, did you poo in the shoe? 噢 马塞尔 坏猴子 Oh, Marcel. Bad monkey. 噢 天啊 Oh, God. 噢 Oh. 抱歉 巴瑞 Sorry, Barry. 一点祝贺你订婚的小礼物 A little engagement gift. 我知道你的礼物清单上没有这个 I'm sure you didn't register for that. 谁死了？谁死了？ Who died? Who died? 把他翻过来 快点 把他翻过来 Roll him over. Oh, come on, roll him over. Oh! 我们知道那不是德柯斯特 对不对 马塞尔？因为… Well, we know it wasn't Dexter, right, Marcel? Because... 马塞尔？马塞尔？马… Marcel? Marcel? Marc...? - 你怎么可能把他弄丢了？ - 我也不知道 - How could you lose him? - I don't know, I don't know. 我们在看电视 然后他大便在摩妮卡的鞋子里… We were watching TV, and then he pooped in Monica's shoe... 等等 他大便在我的鞋子里？哪一只？ Wait. He pooped in my shoe? Which one? 不知道 左脚那一只 I don't know. The left one. 哪一双？ Which ones? 就是那双你认为百搭的笨重黑鞋 Oh, those little clunky Amish things you think go with everything. - 嘿 - 嘿 - Hey. - Hey. 为什么空气中充满了负面情绪？ Whoa, oh. Why is the air in here so negative? - 瑞秋把马塞尔弄丢了 - 不会吧 怎么弄的？ - Rachel lost Marcel. - Oh, no. How? - 他大便在我的鞋子里 - 哪一只？ - He pooped in my shoe. - Which one? 就是我常穿的那双可爱黑鞋 Those cute little black ones I wear all the time. 不是 是哪一只？ No, which one? Ha, ha. 右脚还是左脚？ The right or left? 因为左脚的话 代表幸运 Because the left one is lucky. 大伙儿 拜托 我该怎么办？ Come on, you guys. What am I gonna do? 好吧 好吧 你是一只猴子… All right, all right, all right. You're a monkey... 在城市里走失了 ...you're loose in the city. 你会去哪里？ Where do you go? 好 这是他第一次出门… Okay, it's his first time out... 所以他可能会去一些观光景点 ...so he's probably gonna want to do some of the touristy things. 我去《猫》音乐剧那边找 你们去俄国茶坊找 I'll go to Cats. You go to the Russian Tea Room. 天啊 拜托你们 Oh, my God! Come on, you guys. 他马上就回来 他会杀了我 He's gonna be home any minute. He's gonna kill me. 先从这栋房子开始 你们去1楼和2楼找 Start with the building. You take the first and second floor. 菲比跟我去3楼跟4楼 Phoebe and I will take third and fourth. 那我怎么办？ Whoa, whoa. What am I gonna do? 好 你留在这里等电话 Okay, you stay here and just wait by the phone. 在我的鞋子里喷清洁剂 等罗斯回来杀你 Spray Lysol in my shoe and wait for Ross to kill you. 有人要跟我交换工作吗？ Does anybody want to trade? 你们想干什么？ What do you want? 黑考斯先生 我们朋友的猴子走丢了 你有没有看到？ Mr. Heckles, our friend lost a monkey. Have you seen it? 我把格子松饼放在外头 是不是你们拿走的？ I left a Belgian waffle out here. Did you take it? 不是 No. 你为什么要把格子松饼放在走道里？ Why would you leave your Belgian waffle in the hall? 我还没准备好要吃 I wasn't ready for it. 猴子 你有没有看到猴子？ The monkey, have you seen a monkey? 我见过主持人瑞吉斯一次 I saw Regis Philbin once. 谢谢你 黑考斯先生 Thank you, Mr. Heckles. 你们欠我一块松饼 You owe me a waffle. 好 是一只白脸的黑色僧帽猴… Okay, he's a black capuchin monkey with a white face... 俄式沙拉酱跟腌黄瓜 另外放一边 ...with Russian dressing and pickles on the side. 好的 谢谢 Okay, thanks. - 嘿 - 嘿 今天还可以吧？ - Hi. - Hey. How did it go today? - 噢 好极了 顺利到不行 - 好 - Oh, great. It went great. Really great. - Yeah. - 嘿 你带酒来？ - 对啊 - Hey, is that wine? - Yeah. Yeah. 要喝一些吗？ You, uh, want some? - 噢 我很想喝 - 好的 - Oh, I would love some. - Yeah. 这样好了 这样好了 我们不要在这里喝 But you know what? You know what? Let's not drink it here. 我突然想疯一下 你要不要去纽华克？ I'm feeling kind of crazy. Do you want to go to Newark? 好 好啊 Uh, okay. Yeah. 我们当然可以去那里 但在去东北部的谋杀案首都前… We could do that. But before we head off to the murder capital of the Northeast... 我想先跟你谈一件事 ...I was, uh, kind of wanted to run something by you. 你知道我们先前谈过的… You know how we were, you know, talking before... 有关恋爱之类的话题… ...about relationships and stuff, well... - 天啊 罗斯 我不能这么做 - 好吧 迅速而痛苦 - Oh, God, Ross, I cannot do this. - Okay, quick and painful. 噢 天啊 Oh, God. 好吧 好吧 好吧 Okay, all right. All right, okay. 罗斯 请不要恨我 Ross, please don't hate me. 噢 怎么了？怎么了？ Oh, what? What? What? 你知道马塞尔吧？ You know Marcel? - 怎么？ - 嗯 - Yeah? - Well, ahem. 我好像把他弄丢了 I kind of, uh... I kind of lost him. 我真不敢相信 I can't believe this. 我只是要你看着他 别让他离开这间公寓 I mean, all I asked you to do was keep him in the apartment. 我知道 我知道 对不起 I know, I know. I'm sorry. 你知道吗？我想我也有错 You know what? I guess it's partially my fault. 我不应该一开始就请你照顾猴子 I shouldn't have asked you to start off with a monkey. 应该一开始就请你看着一支铅笔之类的 I should have started you off with, like, a pen or a pencil. 罗斯 我已经在尽力找了 Ross, I'm doing everything that I can. 大家都在找他 而且我还… I've got everybody looking for him and I got... - 哪一位？ - 动物紧急救援小组 - Who is it? - Animal Control. - 我还打电话给动物紧急救援 - 你打给动物救援？ - See, I've even got Animal Control. - You called Animal Control? 嗯哼 Uh-huh. 怎么了？你不喜欢他们吗？ Why? Do you not like them? 马塞尔是非法引进的外来动物 Heh. Marcel is an illegal exotic animal. 我不能在城市里养 I'm not allowed to have him in the city. 他们一旦找到他 就会把他从我身边带走 If they find him, they'll take him away from me. 好吧 这样说好了 你从来没有告诉过我们这件事 Okay, well, now, see, you never ever, ever told us that. 没错 因为我没想到你会邀请他们来这里 That's right, because I didn't expect you we're gonna invite them to the apartment. 你好 谢谢你赶过来 Hi. Thanks for coming. 是不是有人打电话 问猴子怎么处理？ Somebody called about a monkey? 噢 你知道吗？那完全是个误会 Oh. Oh, you know what? That was a complete misunderstanding. 对啊 我们以为我们看到一只猴子 结果不是 Yeah, we thought we had a monkey, but we didn't. - 那是顶帽子 - 猫 - It turned out it was a hat. - Cat. 猫 我刚刚说什么？ Cat. What did I say? 3楼跟4楼 我们都去看过了 Hi. We checked the third and fourth floor. - 没有人看到马塞尔 - 马塞尔？ - No one's seen Marcel. - Marcel? 我叔叔马塞尔 My uncle Marcel. 噢 猴子的名字就是这样来的？ Oh, is that who the monkey's named after? 好吧 Okay. 你们知道私自豢养非法引进的外来动物… Are you aware that possession of an illegal exotic is punishable... 最高可罚到两年牢狱 动物没收 ...by up to two years in prison and confiscation of the animal. 噢 天啊 Oh, my God. 你们会把可怜的小动物关在牢里两年？ You'd put that poor little creature in jail? 菲比 记不记得我们说过 说话前要先想一下？ Pheebs, you remember how we talked about saying things quietly to yourself first? 记得 不过不是随时都有时间可以这样做 Yes, but there isn't always time. 我相信一定有更友善的方式解决 你先请坐 Look, I'm sure there's some friendly way to reconcile this. Um, have a seat. 我们还没自我介绍 我是摩妮卡•盖勒 First of all, we haven't been introduced. I'm Monica Geller. 噢 天啊 是你 Oh, my God, you are. - 而你是瑞秋•葛林 - 对 - And you're Rachel Green. - Yeah. 露伊莎•基雅内蒂 我也是林肯高中毕业的 Luisa Gianetti. Lincoln High? 每次在教室上课时 我都坐在你们后面 I sat behind you guys in homeroom. 露伊莎 噢 我的天啊 Oh! Luisa. Oh, my God. 摩妮卡 是露伊莎耶 Monica. It's Luisa! 同间教室的露伊莎 Luisa. From homeroom. 太好了 Yes! - 你根本不知道我是谁 对不对？ - 不知道 - You have no idea who I am, do you? - No. 完全不知道 Not at all. 也许是因为整整四年 你正眼都没瞧过我 Well, maybe that's because you spent four years ignoring me. 说句"早安 露伊莎" 还是… Would it have been so hard to say, "Morning, Luisa"... "好可爱的吊带裤" 有那么难吗？ ...or "Nice overalls"? 噢 真对不起 Oh, I'm so sorry. 我不怪你 你那时候很胖 问题已经够多了 It's not so much you. You were fat. You had your own problems. 但是你 真是个讨人厌的女生 But you. What a bitch. 什么？ What? 这样好了 过去就算了 You know what? Be that as it may. 看在过去的份上 猴子的事能不能请你帮个忙？ You think you could you help us out here on that monkey thing, for old times' sake? 加油 山猫队 Go, Bobcats. 我可以 但是我不帮 I could. But I won't. 猴子被我找到 就是我的了 If I find that monkey, he's mine. 哒… Da, da, da 很遗憾 Sorry. 马塞尔？ Marcel? 马塞尔？ Marcel? - 马塞尔？- 马塞尔？ - Marcel? - Marcel? 嘿 有什么事我可以帮忙的吗？ Hi, can I help you? 我们有点紧急状况 我们在找东西 Uh, we're kind of having an emergency, and, ahem, we were looking for something. - 找猴子 - 对 你有没有看到一只猴子？ - A monkey. - Yes, have you seen any? 没有 我没看到什么猴子 No. No, I haven't seen a monkey. 你们会不会修理暖气炉？ Do you know anything about fixing radiators? 当然 你们有没有试着把开关往相反方向转？ Sure, sure. Did you try turning the knob back the other way? - 当然有 - 那我们就没办法了 - Of course. - Oh. Then, no. 你尝尝这鸡尾酒 莱姆酒会不会放太多？ Taste this daiquiri. Is there too much rum in here? 等一下 希望你们快点找到猴子 Just a second. Hope you find your monkey. 噢 不 等一下等一下 Oh, no, wait. No, no, no. Wait, wait. 暖气炉我们可能不太熟悉… Um, we may not know about radiators, per se... 但是我们对环境的冷暖… ...but we do have a certain amount of expertise... 有一定程度的认知 ...in the heating and cooling milieu. 我们不是还有事情要做吗？ Uh, weren't we kind of in the middle of something here? 对 但是这些女人很热 而且需要我们帮忙 Yes, but these women are very hot and they need our help. 而且还很辣 And they're very hot. 我们不可以这样 好吗？ We can't, all right? 很遗憾 We're sorry. 你们不知道我们有多遗憾 You have no idea how sorry. 但是我们已经答应要去找猴子 But we promised we'd find this monkey. 如果你们看到他 他大概这么高 叫他马塞尔他会回应 If you see him, he's about yea high and answers to the name Marcel. 如果我们能够有你们的照片 那对我们帮助很大 So if we could get some pictures of you, you'd really be helping us out. 好吧 从现在开始 你不准跟外人说话 Okay, from now on, you don't get to talk to other people. - 马塞尔？ - 马塞尔 - Marcel? - Marcel. 马塞尔？ Marcel? 马塞尔？ Marcel? - 噢 天啊 - 怎么了？ - Oh, my God. - What? 有东西拂过我的右腿 Something just brushed up against my right leg. - 那是什么？ - 噢 - What is it? - Oh. 噢 没什么 那是我的左腿 Oh, it's okay. It was just my left leg. 你看 菲比 Look, Phoebe. 噢 太好了 噢 马塞尔 过来 Oh, yeah. Oh, Marcel. Come here. - 过来 马塞尔 - 两位小姐 请让开 - Oh, come here, Marcel. - Step aside, ladies. - 你要做什么？ - 只是一点镇静剂 - What are you gonna do? - Just a small tranquilizer. 快跑 马塞尔 快跑 跑啊 马塞尔 Run, Marcel, run! Run, Marcel! - 该死 - 你还好吧？ - Damn. - Are you okay? 噢 还好 应该没事 Oh, yeah, I think so. 哦 Oh. 哈 Huh. 哇 Whoa. 噢 天啊 Oh, gosh. 马塞尔 Marcel. Marcel. 这太荒谬了 我们整个社区都找过了 This is ridiculous. We've been all over the neighborhood. 他跑掉了 他跑掉了 He's gone. He's just gone. - 罗斯 你怎么知道？ - 噢 拜托 现在又冷又暗 - Ross, you don't know that. - Oh, come on. It's cold, it's dark. 他根本不熟悉格林威治村 He doesn't know the Village. 现在我的脚骨断了 噢 我的… And now I have a broken foot. Oh, my... 我的猴子不见了 再加上断脚 I have no monkey and a broken foot. 真是谢谢你 Thank you very much. 罗斯 我已经跟你道歉过几百万次了 Ross, you know, I've said I'm sorry, like, a million times. 你要我怎么做？你要我也踢断脚吗？ What do you want me to do? Huh? You want me to break my foot too? 这样吧 我也来踢断我的脚 Here, I'm gonna break my foot right now. Ow! 噢 天啊 好了 这样你高兴了没有？ Oh, my God. There, are you happy now? 有 有 你踢过交通标志后… Yeah, yeah. You know, now that you kicked the sign... 嘿 我突然不再想念马塞尔了 ...hey, ha, ha, I don't miss Marcel anymore. 喂 我又不是故意的 You know, it's not like I did this on purpose. 不 不 当然不是 这只是标准的瑞秋 No, no, no. No, no. This is just vintage Rachel. 你身边的倒霉事都会自动发生 I mean, things just sort of happen around you. 你一直都活在自己的世界里 做你自己的事… I mean, you're off in Rachel Land, doing your Rachel thing... 完全不顾别人的猴子 还是别人的感受… ...totally oblivious to people's monkeys or to people's feelings and... - 连我都不想听 - 罗斯 - I don't even want to hear it. - Ross. - 算了 可以吗？ - 罗斯 - Forget it, okay? - Ross. 怎么了？干嘛？ What? What? 嘿 香蕉男 Hey, banana man. 噢 真是有够强的 Oh, this is so intense. 我一边的屁股完全麻掉 另一边却完全不知道 One side of my butt is totally asleep and the other side has no idea. 嘿 香蕉是你买的吗？ Hi. Did you order some bananas? - 那又怎样？ - 猴子还我 - What about it? - Give me my monkey back. 我没有猴子 I don't have a monkey. - 那买那么多香蕉干什么？ - 需要钾 - Then what's with all the bananas? - Potassium. 马塞尔 马塞尔 Marcel? Marcel. 好 他在哪里 他在哪里？马塞尔 马塞尔？ Okay, where is he? Where is he? Marcel? Marcel? 马塞尔 Marcel. 你对他做了什么？ What have you done to him? 那是我的猴子 派蒂 猴子派蒂 That's my monkey. That's Patty. Patty the monkey. 你疯了吗？ Are you insane? - 马塞尔 快点过来 - 派蒂过来 - Come here, Marcel. Come on. - Come here, Patty. 过来这里 马塞尔 Come here, Marcel. 派蒂 过来这里 Come here, Patty. 过来 猴子 过来这里 Here, monkey. Here, monkey. Here, monkey. 抓到了 Gotcha. - 好 猴子还我 - 现在他是我的猴子 - Okay, give me my monkey back. - That's my monkey. 你得去跟法官解释 You're gonna have to take this up with the judge. 那不是我的猴子 不过裙子是我的 That's not my monkey. Just the dress is mine. 你方便的话 再寄回来给我 You can send it back whenever. - 好 我要我的猴子 - 不行 - All right, I want my monkey. - No. - 拜托你 露伊莎 - 很抱歉 毕业舞会皇后 - Oh, come on, Luisa. - Sorry, prom queen. 你在高中一定要那么讨人厌 You had to be a bitch in high school, 你为什么不能当个胖子 you couldn't have been fat. 听好 高中时 我是毕业舞会皇后… All right, look, in high school, I was the prom queen... 也是返校日皇后 班长 而你… ...and I was the homecoming queen and the class president and you... 也一直都存在 ...were also there. 如果你带走这只猴子… Look, if you take this monkey... 我会失去生命中最重要的一个人 ...I will lose one of the most important people in my life. 你可以恨我 但是请不要惩罚他 You can hate me if you want, but please do not punish him. 拜托你 露伊莎 你有机会可以当更高尚的人 Come on, Luisa, you have a chance to be the bigger person here. 把握这机会 Take it. 不要 No. 好吧 All right. 那我就要打电话给你长官 告诉她… Well, then how about I call your supervisor and I tell her... 你在我朋友的屁股上开了一枪 ...that you shot my friend in the ass with a dart. 嘿 能把这件裙子脱下来 感觉不错吧？ Hey, it'll be nice to get this off finally, won't it? 不然继续让你穿着 也没关系 Or we can leave it on for now. That's fine. 再加上一双漂亮的高跟鞋 整套晚宴装就齐全了 You know, with the right pair of pumps, that would be a great little outfit. 嗯… Listen... 很抱歉先前对你的态度那么差 我只是… I'm sorry I was so hard on you before. You know, I just... 不 罗斯 别这样说 都是我不好 几乎让你失去… No, Ross, come on. No, no. It was my fault. I almost lost your... 不 不 多亏了你 他才能回来 No, no. Yeah, but you were the one who got him back. 你真的很了不起 You know, you were great. 嘿 我们的酒还在 Hey, we still have that bottle of wine. 你想不想来点… Are you in the mood for, uh... 有葡萄的东西？ ...something grape? - 好啊 好主意 - 好 - Sure, that would be good. - All right, uh... 哦 Oh. 一定是邻居在吸地板 The, uh... The neighbors must be vacuuming. 只要我们在这里… Well, ah, as long as we're here... 不是在谈那个话题… ...and not on the subject, um, ahem... 我刚在想… I was thinking about, uh... 我们两个都在生对方的气 ...how mad we got at each other before. 我在想 可能也是因为我们都… And, um, I was thinking maybe it was partially because of how we... - 瑞秋？ - 巴瑞？ - Rachel? - Barry? 我没办法 我办不到 我不能娶敏蒂 I can't. I can't do it. I can't marry Mindy. - 我还爱着你 - 噢 - I'm still in love with you. - Oh! 我们得开始锁门了 We have got to start locking that door. 那是我演《真善美》的时候 This is me in The Sound of Music. - 有看到冯崔普家的孩子们吗？ - 没有 - You see the von Trapp kids? - No. 那是因为我站在他们前面 That's because I'm in front of them. 对哦 我以为那是阿尔卑斯山 Yeah, I thought that was an alp. 我高中时过得不太好 Well, high school was not my favorite time. 是吗？我高中时超快乐的 你们知道吗？ I don't know. I loved high school, you know? 四年都在轰趴 约会 跟女生上床… It was just, like, four years of parties and dating and sex and... 我则是跟四百个男生一起上寄宿学校 Yeah, well, I went to boarding school with 400 boys. 想上床 就得改变整个性向 Any sex I had would've involved a major lifestyle choice. 天啊 感觉好像是几百万年前的事了 对不对？ Gosh, doesn't it seem like a million years ago? 噢… Oh, oh, oh. 噢 我的屁股醒来了 Oh, my butt cheek is waking up. # Friends.S01E20.1994.BluRay.1080p.x265.10bit.MNHD-FRDS.txt 真不敢相信你会这么说 I can't believe you would actually say that. 我宁可当花生先生 也不当盐先生 I would much rather be Mr. Peanut than Mr. Salty. 不会吧 盐先生是个水手哦 No way. Mr. Salty is a sailor, all right? 他一定是最强悍的零食 He's gotta be, like, the toughest snack there is. 难说 不要惹到玉米坚果 I don't know. You don't wanna mess with corn nuts. 他们是疯子 They're crazy. 我的天 我的天 你们快过来看 Oh, my God. Oh, my God. You gotta come see this. 有一个恶心的人拿着望远镜 There's some creep out there with a telescope. 真不敢相信 他居然直接向我们这边看 I can't believe it. He's looking right at us. 真是有病 Oh, that is so sick. 我有被强奸的感觉 I feel violated. 而且是不太好的那种 And not in a good way. 为什么有人能这么做？ How can people do that? 你们看 丑胖子买了一双倒立鞋 Oh, you guys, look. Ugly Naked Guy got gravity boots. 我告诉你们 多年后 小学生都会把这个… I'm telling you, years from now, school children will study it... 当作史上最棒的第一次约会来研究 ...as one of the greatest first dates of all time. 顺利到不可思议 It was unbelievable. 我们非常的自在 不需要耍心机 We could totally be ourselves. We didn't have to play any games. - 你打电话给她了吗？ - 让她知道我喜欢她？你疯了吗？ - So have you called her yet? - Let her know I like her? Are you insane? 你们男生真差劲 Guys. It's gross. 才过一天而已 你要我看起来很黏人吗？ It's the next day. How needy do I wanna seem? 我说的对 对吧？ I'm right. Right? - 吊她胃口 - 必须的 - Let her dangle. - Yeah, definitely. 哦 Oh. 真不敢相信我爸妈给我压力… I can't believe my parents are pressuring me... 要我找你们这种人 ...to find one of you people. 天啊 直接打个电话吧 God. Come on. Just do it. 打给她 少一副睾丸素高涨的样子 Call her. Stop being so testosterone-y. 那是旧金山的特产 Which, by the way, is the real San Francisco treat. - 是机器 - 她的答录机？ - I got her machine. - Her answering machine? 不是 是她的扫叶机接的 No, interestingly enough, her leaf blower picked up. 那你怎么不留话？ So, um, why didn't you say anything? 不 不 不 上次我毫无准备就留言… Oh, no, no, no. Last time I left a spontaneous message... 结果讲出 "木有温题" 这种蠢话 ...I ended up using the phrase, "Yes, indeed-io." 你们看 是瑞秋和巴瑞 大家不要一起回头看 Look, it's Rachel and Barry. No, no, don't everybody look at once. - 好啦好啦 是怎么回事？ - 他们在讲话 - Okay, okay. What's going on? - Okay, they're just talking. 她看起来有没有很生气？ Yeah, well, does he look upset? 他看起来是不是被狠揍过一顿？ Does he look like he was just told to shove anything? 没有 他在微笑 No. No, actually, he's smiling. 天啊 不要那样 Oh, my God. Don't do that. 怎么了？怎么了？怎么了？ What? What? What? 对面有个男人踢了鸽子一脚 That man across the street just kicked that pigeon. 噢 Oh. 基本上 提案就是这样成为法案的 And basically, that's how a bill becomes a law. 哦 Oh. - 知道了吗？嘿 瑞秋 - 嘿 - See? Hey, Rach. - Hey. 你们还好吧？ How'd it go? 说真的 感觉还真好 You know, it was, uh... It was actually really great. 他带我去俄国茶坊吃午餐 Took me to lunch at the Russian Tea Room. 我吃的鸡肉 一捅就有奶油流出来 I had that chicken, you know, where you poke it and butter squirts out. 鸟类今天很衰 Not a good day for birds. 然后我们去逛百货公司 And then we took a walk to Bendel's. 我叫他不要买 但他还是买给我一小瓶香奈儿香水 And I told him not to, but he got me a little bottle of Chanel. 很好 那是你在跟他说… That's nice. Now was that before or after you told him... 别再打电话 送花 不要再烦你之前还是之后？ ...to stop calling, stop sending you flowers and to generally leave you alone, huh? 嗯 那个我们一直没提到 Right. Well, we never actually got to that. 再跟他出去 感觉真好 你们知道吗？感觉… Oh, it was just so nice to see him again, you know? It was... 就是很舒服 熟悉 It was comfortable and it was familiar. 感觉真好 It was just nice. 感觉真好两次了 That's "nice" twice. 瑞秋 这到底是怎么回事？ Rachel, what's going on? 他不是同样那个被你逃婚的巴瑞吗？ Isn't this the same Barry who you left at the altar? 你都跑去哪里了？ Duh. Where have you been? 是啊 可是他今天不一样 Yeah, but it was different with him today. 他今天不是那个讨人厌的牙医 He wasn't, like, Orthodontist Guy, you know? 我们很愉快 这有什么不对吗？ I mean, we had fun. Is there anything wrong with that? 有 Yes. - 为什么？ - 我有我的理由 - Why? - I have my reasons. 他其实已经订婚了 而未婚妻刚好是… Okay, how about the fact that he's engaged to another woman... 你以前的手帕交 这没关系吗？ ...who just happens to be your ex-best friend? 好啦 好啦 好啦 好啦 我知道这样做很蠢 All right. All right, all right, all right. I know it's stupid. 我今天下午去看他 然后结束这整件事 I'll go see him this afternoon and I will just put an end to it. 哇 Wow. - 哇 - 哈 - Wow. - Ha, ha. 对啊 Yeah. 我没疯吧？以前都不是这样的 I'm not crazy, right? I mean, it was never like that. 你没疯 以前不是这样的 No, it wasn't. 这里有个小水槽真好 Oh. It was so nice having this little sink here. "丹妮儿 我没想到答录机会接起来" "Oh, Danielle, I wasn't expecting the machine. "有空的话 打电话给我" Give me a call when you get a chance." 再见 Bye-bye. 天啊 Oh, God. 练习两个小时 只说得出这样？ That's what you've been working on for the past two hours? 喂 我一直在修改好吗 Hey, I've been honing. 为什么要有盘子声？ What was with the dishes? 我要她以为我在餐厅里… Oh, uh, I wanted her to think I might be in a restaurant... 我也有自己的娱乐生活 ...you know, I might have some kind of life. 总不能让她觉得 我已经练习了两个小时吧？ Like I haven't been sitting around here honing for the last two hours? 又来了 那个望远镜男 He's doing it again. The guy with the telescope. 我的天啊 Oh, my God. 走开 不要再看这边了 Oh. Go away. Stop looking in here! 好极了 现在他也在跟我们挥手 Great. Now he's waving back. 我们要想办法对付那男的 We gotta do something about that guy. 今天早上 他在窥探我们家 被我抓到 This morning, I caught him looking into our apartment. 我吓一跳 现在好像什么都不能做了 It creeps me out. I feel like I can't do stuff. 你都做些什么？ What kind of stuff? 成熟一点好不好？我说得不是什么性感的事… Will you grow up? I'm not talking about sexy stuff... 我只不过是煮饭时全裸而已 ...but, like, when I'm cooking naked. 你煮饭时全裸？ You cook naked? 对啊 吐司 麦片粥 不会溅出来的食物 Yeah, toast, oatmeal. Nothing that spatters. 你们看我干嘛？我又不知道 What are you looking at me for? I didn't know that. 怎么了？ What's the matter? 我只是… 巴瑞 这样不好 Oh, I just... Oh, Barry, this was not good. 不 那感觉非常非常好 No, it was. It was very, very good. - 那敏蒂呢？ - 比跟敏蒂好太多了 - What about Mindy? - Oh, way better than Mindy. 不是 我是说 你跟敏蒂怎么办？ No, not that. I mean, what about you and Mindy? 如果你愿意 我去跟她退婚 Oh. If you want, I'll just break it off with her. 不 不 不 不 No. No, no, no. 不 不要那样 不要因为我退婚 No, don't do that. Not for me. 法柏医生 巴比•洛许已经来调整牙套 Dr. Farber, Bobby Rush is here for his adjustment. 谢谢你 柏妮丝 Thanks, Bernice. 我们这个周末去远一点的地方吧 Let's go away this weekend. 巴瑞 拜托 这太… Oh, Barry. Come on. This is all way too... 不 我们可以去阿鲁巴岛 No, we can go to Aruba. 当我去那里 本来是我们蜜月要去的地方… When I went there on what would've been our honeymoon... 那里真的很美 你会很喜欢的 ...it was, uh... It was really nice. You would've liked it. 我的胸罩呢？ I had a bra. 法柏医生 Hey, Dr. Farber. 好 葛林小姐 一切看起来都很好 All right, Miss Green, everything looks fine. 我想我们已经看到一点进展了 Yep, I think we're starting to see some real progress here. - 怎么？ - 我12岁 不代表我很笨 - What? - I'm 12, I'm not stupid. - 我能不能借用你们的电话？ - 好 - Can I use your phone? - Yeah. 不过 谨作为参考… Uh, but for future reference, um, that thing in your hand... 你手上那个也可以当电话用 ...can also be used as a phone. 好 线路没问题 Yes, it's working. 她为什么不回电？ Why isn't she calling me back? 她也许根本没听到你的留言 Maybe she never got your message. 你也可以打她的答录机 如果哔很多声的话… You know, you could call her machine, and if she has a lot of beeps... 表示她还没听留言 ...that means she probably didn't get her messages yet. - 你们不觉得这样很… - 着急？黏人？可悲？ - You don't think that makes me seem...? - Desperate? Needy? Pathetic? 你一定看过我的征友启示 Ah, you obviously saw my personal ad. - 哔了几声？ - 她接起来了 - How many beeps? - She answered. 那时候我们先前讨论过的 "喂" 就很好用 You see, this is where you'd use that "hello" word we talked about. 我才不要 她已经听过我的留言… I'm not going to. She obviously got my message... 选择不回我电话 现在我不但黏人 还被冷落 ...and is choosing not to call me. Now I'm needy and snubbed. 天啊 真想念单纯只是黏人的感觉 God, I miss just being needy. 嘿 Hey. 他的反应如何？ So how'd he take it? 其实还蛮不错的 Pretty well, actually. 瑞秋 你的头发上 怎么会有牙线？ Uh, Rach. How come you have dental floss in your hair? 是吗？ Oh, do I? 我们在牙医椅上做爱 We ended up having sex in his chair. 你们在牙医椅上做爱？ You had sex in his chair? 我说得有点大声 对不对？ I said that a little too loudly, didn't I? 你们什么？ You had what? 在牙医椅上做爱 Sex in his chair. 怎么… What? 你在想什么？ What were you thinking? 我也不知道 我们都还对对方有感觉 I don't know. I mean, we still care about each other. 我们有一段过去 就跟你和卡萝一样 There's a history there. It's like you and Carol. 不 不 不 No. No, no. 跟我和卡萝完全不同 It's nothing like me and Carol. 拜托 如果她跟你说 "罗斯 我现在就要你…" Please. If she said to you, "Ross, I want you on this couch... "在这沙发上 立刻" 你会怎么说？ ...right here, right now," what would you say? 如果有帮助的话 我会坐过来 If it helps I could slide over. 那完全是两回事 It's a totally different situation. 苹果跟柳橙 矫正牙医和女同志… It's apples and oranges. It's orthodontists and lesbians... 我要走了 I gotta go. - 你要去哪里？ - 我就是得走 可以吗？ - Where are you going? - I just have to go, all right? 我走还需要理由吗？我的人生还有别的事要做 Do I need a reason, huh? I have things to do with my life. 我的行程排得非常紧 I have a jam-packed schedule. 我已经赶得喘不过气来了 可以吗？ And I am late for keeping up with it, okay? 喂？喂？ Hello? Hello? 喂？ Hello? 敏蒂 Huh. Mindy. 嘿 你好 Hi. Hey, how are you? 对 我听说了 恭喜 这真是太好了 Yes, yes, I heard. Congratulations. That is so great. 真的 噢 天啊… Really, oh, God... 好 Okay. 好 我明天要上班… Okay, I'm working tomorrow... 但是如果你愿意 可以过来看看 ...but if you want, you can come by if you'd like. 好 Okay. 太好了 Great. 好 All right. 明天见 So I'll see you tomorrow. 再见 好 Okay. Bye. 天啊 噢 天啊… Oh, God. Oh, God. Oh, God. 敏蒂还好吗？ So how's Mindy? 她明天想来看我 Oh, she wants to see me tomorrow. 她的语气听起来很怪 我得打电话给巴瑞 Oh, she sounded really weird. I gotta call Barry. 喂 是我 我才… 敏蒂 Hi, it's me. I just... Ha! Mindy. 敏蒂 嘿 Mindy. Hi. 不 我想你应该在那里 No, I figured that's where you'd be. 地狱里充满了你这种人 Hell is filled with people like you. 又来了 偷窥狂又来了 He's back. The peeper's back. - 蹲下 - 蹲下？ - Get down. - Get down? 你变成鬼了 And boogie. 谢谢 我得去上班 顺便让敏蒂把我的眼睛挖出来 Thanks, but I gotta go to work and get my eyes scratched out by Mindy. 放心 她也许根本不知道 Relax. She may not even know. 拜托 我七个月没跟她连络 她突然打电话给我 Please, I haven't heard from her in seven months, and now she calls me. 还会为了什么事？ I mean, what else is it about? 她曾经是我最好的朋友 She was my best friend, you guys. 我们一起去夏令营… We went to camp together... - 她教我如何接吻… - 是吗？ - ...she taught me how to kiss... - Yeah? 现在 我成了第三者 Now, you know, I'm, like, the other woman. - 我觉得好… - 有情趣 - Ugh, I feel so... - Naughty. - 晚点见 - 我送你出去 - I'll see you guys later. - I'll walk out with you. 她教你接吻的时候 你们在夏令营… When she taught you to kiss, you were at camp... 穿的是小件紧身制服 还是…？ ...and were you wearing any kind of little uniform or...? 算了 That's fine, yeah. 好 我要去上厕所 你能不能帮我看着电话？ Okay, I'm gonna go the bathroom. Will you watch my phone? - 你为什么不把电话拿进去？ - 嘿 - Why don't you just take it with you? - Hey. 我们还没进展到第二次约会 她需要听我嘘嘘吗？ We haven't been on a second date. She needs to hear me pee? 你为什么不干脆打给她？ Why don't you just call her? 我不能打给她 我已经留言了 我也是有尊严的 I can't call her. I left a message. I have some pride. - 是吗？ - 不是 - Do you? - No. 丹妮儿 你好 Danielle, hi. 我是钱德 Hi, it's Chandler. 我很好 I'm fine. Ahem. 是这样的… Uh, listen... 不知道你有没有打电话给我 因为我很白痴… I don't know if you tried to call me because, uh, idiot that I am... 不小心把电话关掉 ...I accidentally shut off my phone. 哦 好 没问题 好极了 好 Ahem. Oh, okay. That's fine. That's great. Okay. 她在另一线上讲电话 她再打回来 She's on the other line. She's gonna call me back. 她在另一线上讲电话 她再打回来 She's on the other line, gonna call me back. - 你不是想去嘘嘘？ - 所以我才跳来跳去 - Don't you have to pee? - That's why I'm dancing. - 敏蒂 - 嘿 你好 - Mindy. - Hey, you. 嘿 你好 Hey, you. 最近还好吗？ So, what's up? 我们应该坐下来说 Um, we should really be sitting for this. 嗯 Hmm. 我们当然要坐下 Sure we should. - 那么… - 我知道最近事情不太对 - So... - Now, I know things have been weird lately. 但是你是我认识最久的老朋友 除了萝莉•莎菲… But you're my oldest friend, except for Laurie Schaefer... 我现在不跟她说话了… ...who I don't talk to anymore... 自从减肥后 她就一副全世界都欠她的样子… ...because she's bitter that she lost the weight... 而且 她的脸居然还不是很漂亮 ...and it turns out, she doesn't have a pretty face. 好 我只问你一次 而且我要很诚实的答案 Okay, I'm gonna just ask you this once, and I want a straight answer. 好 Okay. 你愿不愿意当我的伴娘？ Will you be my maid of honor? - 当然罗 - 那就太好了 - Of course! - Oh, that's so great! 太好了 太好了 It is! It is! - 你就只想问这件事吗？ - 对啊 - Is that all you wanted to ask? - That's all. 怎么了？怎么了？ What? What? 不只这件事 That's not all. - 一定只有这件事 - 不 不只 - Oh, sure it is. - Oh, no, it isn't. No. 我觉得巴瑞在跟别人约会 I think Barry's seeing someone in the city. 你怎么会有这种想法？ What would make you think that? 自从我们宣布订婚后 他就怪怪的 Well, ever since we announced the engagement, he's acted weird. 昨晚他回家的时候 身上有香奈儿的香水味 And then last night, he came home smelling like Chanel. 真的吗？ Really? 敏蒂 如果这样讲 你会好过一点… Mindy, if it'll make you feel any better... 巴瑞跟我订婚后 他的行为也很诡异 ...when Barry and I got engaged, he went through a weird thing too. 噢 天啊 我就是怕这一点 Oh, God. You see, that's what I was afraid of. - 什么？你就是怕哪一点？ - 好吧 好吧 - What? What's what you were afraid of? - Okay, okay. 巴瑞跟你订婚后 他跟我… When Barry was engaged to you, he and I... 也发展出一点什么 ...kind of had a little thing on the side. - 什么？ - 我知道 我知道 - What? - I know, I know. 他跟我求婚时 大家都告诉我 "不要接受" When he proposed to me, everyone said, "Don't do it. "他那样对待瑞秋 对你也会那样" 现在我自己觉得好傻 He's gonna do to you what he did to Rachel." And now I feel so stupid. 哈哈 Ha, ha. 噢 敏蒂 Hmm. Oh, Mindy. 噢 你真的好傻 Oh, you are so stupid. 噢 我们真的都好傻 Oh, we are both so stupid. 什么意思？ What do you mean? - 很熟悉的味道吧？ - 噢 不会吧 - Smell familiar? - Oh, no. 唔 Mm-hm. 我很抱歉 Oh, I'm so sorry. 噢 不 是我很抱歉 Oh, no, me. I am so sorry. 不 是我很抱歉 对不起 No, I am sorry. I'm sorry. 老天 Oh, my. 四个字母 "发出声音" Four letters, "circle or hoop." 响啊 该死 响啊 Ring, damn it, ring. 谢谢 Thanks. 你知道我们的电话坏掉了吗？ You know our phone's not working? 什么？ What? 我从咖啡厅打电话给你 一直没有人接 I tried to call you from the coffee shop. There was no answer. 我把电话关掉了 I turned it off. 我的天啊 我把电话关掉 Mother of God, I turned it off. 就像你跟她讲的那样 Just like you told her you did. 我只是指出反讽之处 Just pointing out the irony. 我去跟对面的门房谈过 So listen, I went across the street and talked to the doorman. 知道偷窥狂的名字 电话可以用了吧？ I got the peeper's name. Can I use the phone? 能不能借用你的电话？ Can I use your phone? 对 请给我 辛尼•马克斯的电话号码 Yeah, the number for a Sidney Marks, please. "加温的工具" "Heating device." 电热器 Radiator. 两个字 Five letters. "电器" "Rdtor." 辛尼在吗？ Yeah, is Sidney there? 哦 你就是？ Oh, this is? - 辛尼是个女人 - 辛尼是个女人 那又怎样？ - Sidney's a woman. - So she's a woman, so what? 对 对 那又怎样？ Yeah, yeah, so what? 我住在你对面… Look, I live across the street... 我知道你喜欢用望远镜偷窥 ...and I know all about you and your telescope. 我很不高兴 知道吗？ And I don't appreciate it, okay? 对 我现在就可以看到你 喂？ Yeah, I can see you right now. Hello? 如果我喜欢穿着内裤 在我家跑来跑去… Look, if I wanna walk around my apartment in my underwear... 我没有必要觉得… 谢谢 ...I shouldn't have to feel like... Thank you. 那不是重点 That's not really the point. 重点是… The point is, that... - 主要是重量训练 但是偶尔… - 乔伊 - Mostly free-weights, but occasionally... - Joey. 对 我的邻居 褐发的 Yeah, my neighbor. Yeah, the brunette. 她说你那天穿那件绿洋装的时候很漂亮 She said you looked pretty that day in the green dress. 绿洋装？真的吗？ The green dress? Really? 她说那天你很像英格丽•褒曼 She said you looked like Ingrid Bergman that day. 哪有 Heh. No. - 嘿 - 嘿 - Hey. - Hey. - 有空吗？ - 当然 当然 - You got a second? - Sure, sure. 请… Come on... 进 ...in. 你好 亲爱的 Hello, sweetheart. - 你们两个在这里干嘛？ - 我们来甩你 - What you guys doing here? - Uh, we are here to break up with you. 你们一起？ Both of you? 我们觉得你是个大烂人 你应该很衰 We think you're a horrible human being, and bad things should happen to you. 对不起 对不起 天啊 真对不起 I'm sorry. I'm sorry. God, I am so sorry. 我是大白痴 我很软弱 无法控制自己 I'm an idiot. I was weak. I couldn't help myself. 不管我做了什么 我会那么做 都是因为我那么爱你 Whatever I did, I only did because I love you so much. 你是在跟哪一个讲 巴瑞？ Uh, which one of us are you talking to there, Bar? 呃… Um... 敏蒂 Mindy. 敏蒂 当然是敏蒂 一直都是敏蒂 Mindy, of course, Mindy. It was always Mindy. 甚至包括我们在那张椅子上做爱的时候？ Even when we were having sex in that chair? 我发誓 不管我在做什么 心里想的都是你 I swear, look, whatever I was doing, I was always thinking of you. 拜托哦 Oh, please. 第二次的时候 就算排队等你挑 你都会认不出她来 During that second time, you couldn't have picked her out of a lineup. 你们还做了两次？ You did it twice? 第一次不能算数 你也认识巴瑞 Well, the first time didn't really count. You know, it was Barry. 噢 对哦 Oh, right. 甜心 宝贝 亲爱的… Honey, baby, sweetheart, look... 再给我一次机会 好不好？ Just give me another chance, okay? 我们再重新来过 我们回去阿鲁巴岛 We'll start all over again. We'll go back to Aruba. 你怎么说？ What do you say? 法柏医生 有点紧急状况 需要你处理 Dr. Farber, we've got an emergency here. 杰森•卡斯达拉诺 被活动牙套呛到 Jason Castalano's choking on his retainer. 天啊 我 马上过去 柏妮丝 Oh, God. Uh, I'll be right there, Bernice. 真的 请不要离开 好吗？ Look, please, please don't go anywhere, okay? - 我马上回来 - 好 - I'll be right back. - Okay. 好 我们会留在这里 继续恨你 Okay, and we'll be here, hating you. 有没有看到他走出去的时候 满身大汗？ See how he was sweating when he walked out of here? 我抓他的下面 你就可以踢他… If I'm hogging the ball, you jump right in there... 然后揍他两拳 我告诉你 那会感觉超爽 ...and take a couple of punches. Because I'm telling you, this feels great. 嗯 我很确定我还是会嫁他 Yeah, I'm pretty sure I'm still gonna marry him. 你在说什么啊？ What are you talking about? 敏蒂 那家伙是个恶魔 Mindy, the guy is the devil. 他是披着人皮的撒旦 He is Satan in a smock. 说真的 我知道他不完美 Look, I know he's not perfect. 但是 到头来 我还是… But the truth is, at the end of the day... 我还是想当… ...I still really wanna be... 巴瑞•法柏牙医… ...Mrs. Dr. Barry Farber... 医师娘 ...D.D.S. 噢 天啊 Oh, God. 我希望你还是能够为我高兴 I hope you can find some way to be happy for me. 也希望你仍然愿意当我的伴娘 And I hope you'll still be my maid of honor. 我希望巴瑞不会在阿鲁巴岛把你生吞活剥吃掉 And I hope Barry doesn't kill you and eat you in Aruba. 你还好吗？ You okay? 还好 Yeah. 真的？ Really? 真的 Yeah. 你知道吗 我把巴瑞丢在婚礼上 逃了婚后… You know, ever since I ran out on Barry at the wedding... 我想过我的决定是否正确 ...I have wondered whether I made the right choice. 现在我知道了 Oh. And now I know. 很为你高兴 I'm so glad. 大日子唷 Big day. 好 我可以赞成 花生先生比较会穿衣服 All right, I'll give you this: Mr. Peanut is a better dresser. 他戴着单片眼镜 加上礼帽… I mean, he's got the monocle, he's got the top hat... 你们知道他是同志吗？ Did you know he's gay? 只是想澄清一下 你在揪花生先生出柜吗？ I just wanna clarify this. Are you outing Mr. Peanut? - 钱德？ - 丹妮儿 你好 - Chandler? - Danielle, hi. 各位 这位是丹妮儿 丹妮儿 这都是我朋友 Everybody, this is Danielle. Danielle, everybody. 你好 Hi. - 你怎么会在这里？ - 我一直打电话给你… - What are you doing here? - I've been calling you... 后来才知道电话号码错了 ...but it turns out I had your number wrong. 我从查号台拿到正确号码后 却没人接 And when I finally got the right one from Information, there was no answer. 我就想来这里 看看你好不好 So I thought I'd just come down here and make sure you were okay. 噢 我很好 Oh, uh, I'm okay. 改天我们出去逛逛好吗？ Listen, uh, maybe we could get together later? 好啊 我再打给你 还是你打给我 都可以 That sounds good. I'll call you. Or you call me, whatever. - 你也知道 - 哈… - You know. - Ha, ha. - 当然 - 好 - You got it. - Okay. - 大伙儿再见 - 再见 - Bye, everybody. - Bye. 好啊 就是要这样 Woo-hoo! Yeah, there you go. 第二次约会 Second date. 我不确定 I don't know. 你不确定？ You don't know? 她看起来很讨人喜欢 但是大老远跑来这里… Oh, she seems nice, but that thing about her coming all the way here... 只为了看我好不好？有人那么黏人的吗？ ...just to see if I was okay? I mean, how needy is that? # Friends.S01E21.1994.BluRay.1080p.x265.10bit.MNHD-FRDS.txt 怎么会有人知道你的信用卡号码？ How'd someone get your credit card number? 我也不知道 看看他们花了多少钱 I have no idea. Look how much they spent! 摩妮卡 冷静点 Monica, Calm down. 信用卡公司说 你只要付你有买东西的钱 You only have to pay for the stuff you bought. 但这真的是挥霍无度 Still, it's just such reckless spending. 我想他们偷你的信用卡时… When somebody steals your credit card... 早就将王法抛诸脑后了 ...they've kind of already thrown caution to the wind. 哇 真是怪人 花了美金69.95元买神奇拖把 Wow, what a geek. They spent $69.95 on a Wonder Mop. 是我买的 That's me. 噢 恶心 Oh! Oh, the yuck. 他又来了 He's doing it again! 马塞尔 别再侵犯那盏灯了 Marcel, stop humping the lamp! 不要这样 马塞尔 回来 Stop humping! Now, Marcel, come back! 过来这里 马塞尔 Come here, Marcel! 不要 别去我房间 我去抓他 Oh, no, no! Not in my room! I'll get him. 罗斯 你得想想办法 You've got to do something about the humping. 干嘛？只是阶段性而已 What? It's just a phase. 我们也是那样说乔伊的 Well, that's what we said about Joey. 放轻松点好吗？没什么大不了的 Hey, would you all relax? It's not that big a deal. 马塞尔 给我停止 马塞尔 你这个坏猴子 Marcel, stop it! Marcel! Bad monkey! - 怎么了？ - 呃 - What? - Ugh! 就说我的好奇娃娃 已经不再好奇了吧 Let's just say my Curious George doll is no longer curious. 摩妮卡 你不会还在看那个东西吧 Ugh, Monica, you are not still going over that thing. - 这个女人过着我的生活 - 什么？ - This woman's living my life. - What? 她在过我的生活 而且过得比我好 She's living my life, and she's doing it better than me. 你看看这个 看 Look at this. Look. 她买票去看我想看的戏 She buys tickets to plays I want to see. 她买的衣服是我早就想买的 She shops at stores that I'm intimidated by the salespeople. 她花三百美金在美术用品上 She spent $300 on art supplies. 你又不是艺术家 You're not an artist. 如果我有那些东西 或许就可以了 Yeah, well, I might be if I had the supplies. 这些我都可以做啊 只是我都没做 I mean, I could do all this stuff. Only I don't. 摩妮卡 别这样 你也做很多很棒的事情啊 Oh, Monica, come on. You do cool things. 是吗？来比较一下吧 Oh, really? Let's compare, shall we? 现在做比较 会不会太晚了？ Oh, it's so late for "shall we?" 我会去公园骑马吗？ Do I go horseback riding in the park, hmm? 我会在新学院大学上课吗？ Do I take classes at The New School? - 不会 - 不会 - No. - No. 太不公平了 This is so unfair. 她有所有我要的东西 而且不用应付我妈妈 She's got everything I want, and she doesn't have my mother. 乔伊•帕帕尼如何？ How about Joey Paponi? 不行 太有种族意味了 No, still too ethnic. 我的经纪人觉得要取中立一点的名字 My agent thinks I should have a name that's more neutral. 乔伊•瑞士？ Joey Switzerland? 而且我觉得叫乔就好 乔伊听起来好像我只有… Plus I think it should be Joe. Joey makes me sound like I'm... 这么大而已 ...this big. 但我并不是 Which I'm not! 乔 乔 乔… 史达林？ Joe, Joe, Joe... Stalin? 史达林 Stalin. 我听过那个名字吗？好耳熟 Do I know that name? That sounds familiar. - 我没印象 - 唔 - Well, it does not ring a bell with me. - Huh. 乔•史达林 Joe Stalin. 还挺不错的 You know, that's pretty good. - 还可以试试乔瑟夫 - 啊 - You might want to try Joseph. - Ah! 乔瑟夫•史达林 Joseph Stalin! - 大家一定会记得 - 当然啦 - I think you'd remember that! - Oh, yes! 《别了 鸟儿》由乔瑟夫•史达林主演 Bye Bye Birdie, starring Joseph Stalin. 乔瑟夫•史达林是《屋顶上的提琴手》 Joseph Stalin is the Fiddler on the Roof. - 嘿 - 嘿 - Hey. - Hey. 嗨 Hi. 嗨 我是摩妮卡•盖勒 Hi. Uh, yes, this is Monica Geller. 我在你们那边上课 我想知道是什么课程 Um, I'm taking classes with you, and I was wondering what they were. 你在干嘛？ What are you doing? 好 太好了 All right, great. 好 谢谢了 Great. Thanks a lot. 我要去上踢踏舞课了 I'm going to tap class. 好让你跟偷了你信用的女人一起跳舞吗？ So you can dance with the woman that stole your card? 她偷了我的人生 我想知道她是谁 She's got my life. I want to see who she is. 那就去邮局啊 我相信里面有张贴她的照片 Go to the post office! I'm sure her picture's up! 亲爱的 你快失控了 Honey, you're kind of losing it here. 这已经变成怪异的执迷 This is really becoming a weird obsession. 这太疯狂了 我告诉你 This is madness, I tell you. 上帝保佑 摩妮卡 别这么做 For the love of God, Monica, don't do it! 谢谢 Thank you. 你们怎么想？ What do you think? 想很多事情 Lots of things. 你觉得她是哪一个？ Which one do you think she is? - 有我可以效劳的地方吗？ - 不用了 谢谢 - May I help you? - Oh, no, thanks. 我们只是来参观的 We're just here to observe. 舞蹈课不是用来参观的 要用跳的 You don't observe a dance class. You dance a dance class! 那边有鞋子 Spare shoes are over there. 什么意思？ What does she mean? 我想她是说 "舞蹈课…" I think she means, "You dance... "要用跳的 " ...a dance class!" 来吧… Come on, come on, come on! 真的吗？ Really? 嘿 你有看到我的分身吗？ Hey, do you see anybody you think could be me? 各位 上次下课后 有人留下优格空瓶 People, last time there were yogurt containers lying around after class. 不要再让这种事发生了 Let's not have that happen again! 她可以当你的分身 She could be you. 开始吧 Let's get started. 五 六 五 六 七 八 Five, six. Five, six, seven, eight. 好 我完全不会 Okay, I'm not getting this! 我超会的 I'm totally getting it! 你会觉得自己超不协调的吗？ Do you ever just feel like you're so unbelievably uncoordinated? 干嘛？他们踢的时候 跟着踢就是了 What? You just click when they click. 好吧 各位 找个舞伴 All right. Now everyone grab a partner. 噢… Oh! Oh. 我死去的母亲说 就是你 我跟瑞秋是舞伴 All right. And my dead mother said you are it! I'm with Rachel. 太好了 体育课的旧事又重演了 Great, it's gym class all over again. 啊 Aww. 没关系 你可以来前面 跟我搭档 That's all right. You can come up to the front and dance with me. 我还不如脱掉衣服 做个恶梦算了？ Why don't I just take off my clothes and have a nightmare? 没关系了 我来了 很抱歉我迟到了 It's okay, it's okay! I'm here, I'm here. I'm so sorry I'm late. 好 我到了 Okay, here I am. 这位紧张的新人是谁？ So who's the new tense girl? 她是你的舞伴 She's your partner. - 嗨 我是摩妮卡 - 嗨 - Hi, I'm Monica. - Hi. 哦… Oh, ha. 摩妮卡 Monica. 嗨 我是摩… Hi, I'm Mon... 娜娜 Nana. - 摩娜娜？ - 是的 - Monana? - Yeah. 是荷兰语 It's Dutch. 开玩笑吧 我在阿姆斯特丹住了三年 You're kidding. I spent three years in Amsterdam. 我是宾州的荷兰人 Um, Pennsylvania Dutch. 要跳舞了 And we're dancing! 五 六 七 八 Five, six, seven, eight. 嗨 Hi. - 嘿 - 嘿 - Hey. - Hey. - 你去哪了？ - 我刚从兽医那里回来 - Where have you been? - I just got back from the vet. 她不会叫你戴那些塑胶头套吧？ She's not gonna make you wear a big plastic cone, is she? 她说马塞尔乱性不是暂时的 She says Marcel's humping thing is not a phase. 显然他已经性成熟了 Apparently, he's reached sexual maturity. 嘿 他比你还快耶 Hey, he beat you! 她说他会愈来愈暴力 侵略性愈来愈强 She says, as time goes on, he'll start getting aggressive and violent. 什么意思？ What does this mean? 我得放弃他 I have to give him up. 我不敢相信 罗斯 这太扯了 I can't believe it, Rose. This sucks! 我不懂 你才刚养他 怎么可能已经成年了？ You just got him. How could he be an adult already? 我知道 前一天才小小只的… I know, I know. One day he's this little thing... 不知不觉中就变成… ...and before you know it, he's this little thing... 紧抓我的腿不放的小东西 ...I can't get off my leg. 没有办法能让你留下他吗？ Isn't there any way you can keep him? 没有 No. No. 兽医说除非有个地方… The vet said that unless he's in a place where he has regular access... 让他获得正常的猴爱 ...to some monkey loving... 否则他会愈来愈残暴 ...he's just gonna get vicious. 我得把他送到动物园 I just gotta get him into a zoo. - 要怎么把猴子送到动物园？ - 我知道 - How do you get a monkey into a zoo? - I know that one! 不 那是教宗进入福斯汽车 No, that's popes into a Volkswagen. 我们申请了很多动物园 首要选择当然是州立动物园 We're applying to a lot of them. Our first choice would be a state zoo. 像是圣地亚哥 You know, like, uh, San Diego. 对吧？ Right? 但那可能是遥不可及的梦想 因为他来自州外 But that may just be a pipe dream because he's out-of-state. 我的兽医在迈阿密有认识人 所以有可能去那里 My vet knows someone at Miami, so that's a possibility. 但那里离海滩只有两条街 一定是轰趴动物园 But that's two blocks from the beach. It's a total party zoo. - 嘿 - 嘿 - Hey. - Hey. - 嗨 - 我们找到那个女生了 - Hi. - We found the girl! - 什么？ - 有打电话给警察吗？ - What? - Did you call the cops? 没有 我们请她吃午餐 Nope. We took her to lunch. 你们自己的私自执法方式 Ah. Your own brand of vigilante justice. 你疯了吗？这个女人偷了你的东西 Are you insane? This woman stole from you! 她偷东西 是小偷耶 She stole! She's a stealer! 跟她相处十分钟之后 你就会忘掉这些了 After you're with this woman for 10 minutes, you forget all that. 她真的是个奇女子… I mean, she's this astounding person... 振奋人心 ...with this amazing spirit! 是啊 可能是从啦啦队员那里偷来的 Yeah, which she probably stole from some cheerleader! - 把帽子脱掉 - 福斯车里的教宗 - Take off their hats. - Popes in a Volkswagen! 唔 Mm-hm. 我超爱那个笑话 I love that joke. - 不可能 你不可能这么做 - 摩娜娜很勇敢 - No way! No way did you do this! - Monana was very brave. 超狂野的 It was so wild. 我们跟他们说我们是 615号房的刚氏姐妹… We told them we were the Gunnersons in room 615... 才知道波士顿的《塞尔蒂克队》包下整个六楼 ...only to find out the Boston Celtics had the entire sixth floor! 当他们发现我们很矮而且有胸部后 So when they caught on to the fact that we're short and have breasts... 就把我们轰出去 我被饭店赶出去 我耶 They threw us out. I was thrown out of a hotel! Me! 好样的 摩娜娜 Go, Monana! 不是只有你们活在梦想中 Well, you ladies are not the only ones living the dream. 我得去为我不认识的人倒咖啡了 不用等我了 I get to go pour coffee for people I don't know. Don't wait up. 噢 还有一件事… Oh, by the way... 我们明天要去参加百老汇的试镜 ...tomorrow we're auditioning for a Broadway show. 什么？ Excuse me? 《猫》剧有一个缺额 There's an open call for Cats. 我想说我们可以去演唱《回忆》… I'm thinking we go down there, sing "Memories"... 把自己当成傻子 你觉得如何？ ...and make complete fools of ourselves. What do you say? 不 不 不 No, no, no. 要记得我是什么样的人 Remember who you're dealing with here. Ha. 我不像你 我连站在踢踏舞教室前面都有困难 I'm not like you. I can't even stand in front of a tap class. 那大概是因为你有孟诺教派的背景 That's because of your Amish background. - 什么？ - 你是宾州的荷兰人 对吧？ - What? - Well, you're Pennsylvania Dutch, right? 对 Right. 直到我买了吹风机 就被逐出村里 Till I bought a blow dryer. Then I was shunned. 我以前就跟你一样 I was just like you. 然后有一天 我看了一部改变我一生的电影 And then one day, I saw a movie that changed my life. - 你有看过《死亡诗社》吗？ - 嗯 - Did you ever see Dead Poets Society? - Uh-huh. 我觉得那部电影超级… I thought that movie was so incredibly... 无聊的 ...boring! 最后那个孩子自杀… I mean, that thing at the end where the kid... 只因为不能参与话剧演出？ ...kills himself because he can't be in the play? 搞什么？ What was that? 拜托 等个一年 离家参与社区话团演出不就行了 It's like, "Kid, wait a year. Leave home, do some community theater!" 我走出戏院后心想… I walked out of there, and I thought: "我浪费了永远拿不回来的两小时生命" "Now, that's two hours of my life that I'm never getting back!" 那个想法震撼了我 让我及时行乐 And that scared me more than all the other crap I was afraid to do. 哇 Wow. 那我绝对不推荐你看《窈窕奶爸》 Then I would definitely not recommend Mrs. Doubtfire. 天啊 Oh, God. 我们进不了斯克兰顿 We didn't get into Scranton. 那是我们的保障动物园 That was our safety zoo. 他们连狗和牛都收 They take, like, dogs and cows. 看吧 See? 我不懂是我还是他 比较难受 I don't know who this is harder on, me or him. 我想是那张椅子最难受 I'd say that chair's taking the brunt of it. 马塞尔 马塞尔 Marcel. Marcel. 马塞尔 不要弄了 Marcel, no. 好孩子 Good boy! 看到了吗？怎么可能没人要他？ See? How can nobody want him? 会有人要的 Somebody will. 你们知道已经有位乔瑟夫•史达林了吗？ You know there already is a Joseph Stalin? 你在开玩笑吧 You're kidding! 显然他是个俄国独裁者 屠杀过很多人 Apparently, he was this Russian dictator who slaughtered all these people! - 你会想说这种事应该知道的 - 你会想说我该知道的 - You'd think you would've known that! - You'd think I would've. 菲比 你觉得什么艺名适合我？ Phoebe, what do you think a good stage name for me would be? 火焰男孩 Flame Boy! 你的动物园在哪里？ Where exactly is your zoo? 严格来说 它不能算是动物园 Well, it's technically not a zoo per se. 它比较像是互动的野生体验 It's, uh, more of an interactive wildlife experience. 让我问问你几个问题 他叫做马塞尔对吧？ Let me ask you some questions about... Is it, uh, Marcel? - 对 - 对… - Yes. - Yes. Uh... 他会和其他动物打架吗？ Does he, uh, fight with other animals? 不会 他非常温驯 No, no. He's very docile. 即使被逼到角落去也一样吗？ Hmm. Even if he were cornered? 嗯 我不太清楚 为什么问？ Well, I don't know. Why? 他掌控小东西的能力为何？ Um, how is he at handling small objects? 他可以握住香蕉 如果你是这个意思的话 He can hold a banana, if that's what you mean. 铁槌或小刀呢？ What about a hammer or a small blade? 他为什么会需要小刀？ Why would he need a blade? 如果他得面对猎豹或有角的动物… If he's up against a jungle cat or an animal with horns... 总得给他点东西自我防卫吧 ...you got to give the little guy something. 不然就太残忍了 Otherwise, it's just cruel! 他能去圣地亚哥了 He got into San Diego! - 什么？ - 对 - What? - Yeah. 我们散步回来后 电话响起 We were coming back from our walk, and the phone was ringing... - 他进了 - 他进了？ - He's in! - He's in? Ah! 你有听到吗 马塞尔？ Did you hear that, Marcel? 是圣地亚哥耶 太棒了 San Diego! San Diego! Yeah! 你真的犯下大错 圣地亚哥的环境是很不错… You're making a mistake. San Diego's well and good... 但如果你把他交给我 我会训练他对抗瞎眼的兔子… ...but if you give him to me, I'll start him against a blind rabbit... 还给你百分之二十的门票收入 ...and give you 20 percent of the gate. 哟嚯 Yo-ho! 你去哪里了？ Where have you been? 摩妮卡和我跑去大使馆派对 Monica and I just crashed an embassy party. 你喝醉了吗？ Are you drunk? 才没有 No! 我说谎 I'm lying. 我超醉的 I am so drunk! 天啊 Oh, God! 太好了 你该打通电话回来的 Ugh. Great. You know what? You could have called. 我一直在家里担心你 I've been up here. I've been worried... 摩妮卡 Monica. 摩妮卡？ Monica? 水超棒的 Water rules! 是的 没错 Yes. Yes, it does. 餐厅今天又打来了 他们想知道你会不会去上班 The restaurant called. They want to know if you're showing up. 不会 Nope! 我今天要去看大苹果马戏团 I'm going to the Big Apple Circus today. 你在干嘛？你会失去你的工作 这一点都不像你 What are you doing? You're gonna lose your job. This is not you! 不 这正是我 No, it is me! 我不只是那种必须拍松枕头… I'm not just the person who needs to fluff the pillows... 帐单一来就立刻缴钱的人 ...and pay the bills as soon as they come in! 我跟她在一起时 就不再是那样的人 You know, when I'm with her, I'm so much more than that! 我是… I'm... 我是摩娜娜 I'm Monana! 喂？ Ahem, hello? 她在 请稍等 Yes, she is. Hold on a second, please. 摩娜娜 找你的 Ahem, Monana, it's for you. 信用卡公司打来的 The credit card people. 喂？ Hello? 是 Yes? 天啊 Oh, my God! 谢了 Thanks. 怎么了？ What? 他们逮捕摩妮卡了 They've arrested Monica. - 嗨 - 嘿 - Hi. - Hey. 你还好吗？ How are you? 还可以 幸好我喜欢蓝色 I'm not too bad. Fortunately, blue's my color. 你怎么知道我在这里的？ How did you know I was here? 因为… Because... 我是摩妮卡•盖勒 ...I'm Monica Geller. 你之前用的是我的信用卡 It was my credit card you were using. 这点我完全没料到 That I was not expecting. 我想让你知道 报案的人不是我 I want you to know, I didn't turn you in. 噢 Oh. - 谢了 - 不 我才要谢谢你 - Thanks. - No, thank you. 你带给我太多东西了 You have given me so much. 如果不是你 我永远无法… If it wasn't for you, I'd never have gotten... 在冬花园剧院演唱《回忆》 ...to sing "Memories" at the Winter Garden Theater. 其实你只开口唱了"回"而已 Actually, you only got to sing "Memo..." 我不敢相信你在这里 没有你我该怎么办？ I can't believe you're in here. What am I gonna do without you? 谁会跟我混进大使馆宴会？ Who's gonna crash the embassy parties with me? 谁要带我去看大苹果马戏团？ Who's gonna take me to the Big Apple Circus? 摩妮卡 我每天早上都得在25个人面前尿尿… Monica, I started my day by peeing in front of 25 other women... 你却担心谁要带你去看大苹果马戏团？ ...and you're worried about who will take you to the Big Apple Circus? 也不是担心 我只是纳闷而已 Well, not worried, you know, just wondering. 没什么好纳闷的 There's nothing to wonder about. 你就回去过以前的生活 因为那才是真正的你 You'll go back to being who you were because that's who you are. - 也不尽然 - 就是这样 - Not necessarily. - Yes, necessarily. 我不知道是为什么 I don't know what it is. 或许和你是孟诺教派的人有关 Maybe it's the Amish thing. 我其实不是孟诺教派的人 Um, I'm not actually Amish. 真的吗？那你为何那么像？ Really? Then why are you like that? 站在门边的那个 要不要加入？ You by the door, in or out? 要 In! 后面的那个 你全都跳错了 You in the back, you're getting it wrong! 至少我有在跳 At least I'm doing it! 这是飞往圣地亚哥 67航班的最后登机通知 This is the final boarding call for Flight 67 to San Diego... 登机门为42A ...boarding at Gate 42A. 好 再见了 小家伙 Okay, goodbye, little monkey guy. - 我替你写了一首诗 - 啊 - I wrote you this poem. - Aw. 但是上了飞机才能吃 Okay, but don't eat it till you get on the plane. - 谢谢你 菲比阿姨 - 啊 - Thank you, Aunt Phoebe. - Aww. 好 再见了 好小子 Okay, bye, champ. 我知道圣地亚哥有很多美眉… There's gonna be a lot of babes in San Diego... 但是记得要学的事情还很多 ...but remember, there's also a lot to learn. 罗斯 我不知道该说些什么 他是只猴子 I don't know what to say, Ross. Uh, it's a monkey. 说出心里的感受就行了 Just say what you feel, Joey. 马塞尔 我饿了 Marcel, I'm hungry. 那很好啊 That was good. - 马塞尔 这是给你的 - 哦 - Marcel, this is for you. - Oh. 这是… 你知道 让你… It's, uh, just, you know, something to, um... 在飞机上有事情做 ...do on the plane. 如果你们不介意的话 我想跟他独处一下 If you don't mind, I'd like a moment, just me and him. - 好 - 当然可以 - Sure. - Of course. Absolutely. 哦 Oh. 马塞尔 过来这边 Marcel, come here. Come here. 来吧 Come here. 小子… Well, buddy... 就这样了 ...this is it. 我想说几件事 There's just a couple of things I wanted to say. 我会很想念你的 I'm really gonna miss you. 我永远不会忘记你 You know? And I'm never gonna forget about you. 你对我而言 一直不只是只宠物 You've been more than just a pet to me. 你更像是… You've been more like a... 好 马塞尔 你可以…？ Okay. Marcel, would you...? 马塞尔 你可以不要弄我的脚吗？ Marcel, would you leave my leg alone? 你能暂时不要乱来吗？马塞…？ Would you just stop humping me for two seconds? Marc... Would you...? 好 麻烦把他带走 带他走吧 Okay, would you just take him away? Just take him. 喔 希望我是你手上的手套… O! That I were a glove upon that hand... 这样就能抚摸你的脸颊 ...that I might touch thy cheek. 行了 谢谢 That's fine. Thank you. 下一位 Next. 嗨 我来试演马丘修的角色 Hi. Uh, I'll be reading for the role of Mercutio. - 你的名字？ - 豪顿•麦鼠蹊 - Name? - Holden McGroin. # Friends.S01E22.1994.BluRay.1080p.x265.10bit.MNHD-FRDS.txt - 跟他讲 跟他讲 - 跟他讲啦 - Tell him. Please tell him. - Tell him. - 闭嘴 - 跟我讲什么？ - Shut up. - Tell me what? - 你连看他都不敢 - 跟我说啦 拜托 - You won't even look at him. - Oh, come on, tell me. 多一个理由解释为何女人都不看我 也不错 I could use another reason why women won't look at me. 好啦 好啦 好啦 All right, all right, all right. 昨晚 我梦到… Last night, I had a dream... 你跟我… ...that, um, you and I were, uh... 在这张桌子上做 Doing it on this table. - 喔 - 漂亮的梦中上垒 - Wow. - Excellent dream score. 为什么…？你为什么会做那种梦？ Why...? Why would you dream that? 更重要的是 我厉害吗？ More importantly, was I any good? 嗯 真的很不错 Well, you were pretty damned good. Ha, ha. 有意思 因为在我的梦中 我笨拙到让人吃惊 Interesting, because in my dreams, I'm surprisingly inadequate. 昨晚你在这张桌子上非常熟练 Well, last night, you seemed to know your way around the table. 能够这样分享真好 I love it when we share. 你还好吧？ You okay there? 真不敢相信你们在她的梦里做爱 I can't believe you two had sex in her dream. 对不起 就那么一次而已 I'm sorry. It was a one-time thing. 我非常醉 而且那是别人的潜意识 I was very drunk, and it was someone else's subconscious. - 嘿 瑞秋 - 嗯 - Hello, Rachel. - Ugh. 下来 Get off. 拿来 你们想象得到让我操作钻床吗？ Ooh. Oh, give me. Can you see me operating a drill press? 不知道 你穿什么衣服？ I don't know. What are you wearing? 菲比 你为什么想操作钻床？ Pheebs, why would you want to operate a drill press? 短期打工 Just for some short-term work. 直到我的一些按摩客人回来 You know, till I get back some of my massage clients. 又是海盗吗？ Pirates again? 不是 完全无关 No. Nothing like that. 我只是个白痴 I'm just such a dummy. 我在一个 "在家自我按摩" 讲座教他们 I taught this "Massage Yourself at Home" workshop. 结果他们真的照做 And they are. 嘿 钱德 她可以去你那里工作 Hey, hey, Chan, she could work for you. 谢谢你 乔伊 那真是个好主意 Thanks, Joey. That's a good idea. 什么？我可以啊 真的 要做什么？ What? I could. I could do it. What is it? 我的秘书要请假 Well, my secretary's gonna be out. 她要做单边缩乳手术 She's having one of her boobs reduced. 一整个复杂的乳房故事 It's a whole big boob story. 当秘书我没问题 I could be a secretary. 嗯 难说 不知道你会不会喜欢… Well, I don't know if it's your kind of thing... 因为一整天大部分的时间… ...because, uh, it involves a lot of being normal... 都要当个正常人 ...ahem, for a large portion of the day. 我办得到 I could do that. - 你在玩什么？ - 我的哔哔机 - What are you playing with? - It's my new beeper. 搞什么？古生物学家需要什么哔哔机？ Why the hell does a paleontologist need a beeper for? 恐龙有紧急状况时用？ Is it, like, for dinosaur emergencies? "救命 快来 他们仍然处于绝种状态" "Help, come quick! They're still extinct!" 不是 卡萝准备要生产时用的 她什么时候都找得到我 No, it's for when Carol goes into labor. She can get me wherever I am. 她只需要打55JIMBO All she has to do is dial 55-JIMBO. 好酷的号码 而且小孩也可以取这个名字 A cool phone number and a possible name for the kid. - 我们晚点再见 - 要去跟小伊森约会了吗？ - I'll see you guys later. - Off to see young Ethan? 谢谢你哦 Thank you. 小伊森是有多小？很小吗？ How young is young Ethan? Young? 我们的年龄 He's our age. 我们那时几岁…？ When we were? - 好吧 他读大学四年级 - 大学？ - Okay, he's a senior in college. - College? - 喔 - 哇 - Ooh. - Whoa. 这个大男孩不在乎你的年龄吗？ And this man-child has no problem with how old you are? 当然不在乎 No, of course not. 那根本不是问题… It's not even an issue... 因为我跟他说我22岁 ...because I told him I was 22. - 什么？ - 什么？ - What? - What? - 怎么 说我22岁没人相信吗？ - 25 26还有可能 - Oh, I can't pass for 22? - Well, maybe 25, 26. - 我26岁 - 看吧 - I am 26. - There you go. 你听到了吗？ Can you hear that? 听到了 Yeah. Ha, ha. 你电话接起来 那声音就会停 That'll stop when you pick up the phone. 哦 哈哈 Oh. Ha, ha. - 好 开始了 - 好吧 - Okay. Ooh, I'm on. - Okay. 宾先生办公室 Mr. Bing's office. 不好意思 他现在正在开会 No, I'm sorry, he's in a meeting right now. 我哪有在开会 我人就在… I'm not in a meeting. I'm right... 请问他知道这是有关哪一方面的事吗？ Will he know what this is in reference to? 他有你的电话号码吗？ And he has your number? 好 我一定会转达留言 再见 All right, I'll see that he gets the message. Bye-bye. - 什么？ - 罗斯打来打招呼 - What? - Ross says hi. 啊 Ah. 好好玩哦 好 现在我们要做什么？ This is so fun. All right, what do we do now? 嗯 现在我真的要开始工作了 Well, now I actually have to get to work. "很有可能" "Most likely." - 好 我就在外面 - 好 - Okay, I'm gonna be out there. - Okay. - 好啦 再见 - 再见 - All right. Bye-bye. - Bye-bye. 什么事？ Yes? 你在做什么？ What you doing? 好 窗户很干净 蜡烛都点了 Okay, windows are clean, candles are lit. 皮带太紧 要换皮带 Ooh, belt's too tight. Gotta change the belt. 鱼翻面了吗？没有 因为我做的是千层面 Did I turn the fish? Nope, because I made lasagna. - 我是不是完全失控了？ - 一点点 - Am I out of control? - Just a touch. 摩妮卡 我不懂 Mon, I don't understand. 你跟这个男的从… 期中考吧 就开始约会了 I mean, you've been dating this guy since, like, his midterms. 你为什么突然…？ I mean, why all of a sudden are you so? 哦 Oh. 什么？ What? 是不是就在今夜？ Could tonight be the night? 不知道 I don't know. 他是个很好的人 我喜欢跟他在一起 但是你也知道… Look, he's a great guy, and I love being with him, but, you know... 事情该发生的时候就会发生 ...things happen when they happen. 计划不了的 You don't plan these things. - 你刮过腿毛了吗？ - 刮过了 - Oh. So did you shave your legs? - Yeah. 唔… Uh-huh. 能不能不要再钻牛角尖了 罗斯？那只是一个梦 Would you let it go, Ross? It was just a dream. 那不表示… It doesn't mean... 来了 天啊 要生了 要生宝宝了 Oh, oh, oh. Oh, this is it. Oh, my God. It's baby time. Baby time. 别紧张 别紧张 不要紧张 轻松一点 All right, relax, relax, just relax, just relax. Be cool. 喂 哔哔机刚刚响 Yeah, hi, I was just beeped. 这里没有安德烈 今天已经第三次了 No, Andre is not here. Third time today. 对 我很确定 Yes, I am sure. 不 先生 我不提供那样的服务 Heh. No, sir, I do not perform those kind of services. 服务？哦 服务 Services? Oh, services. 对 您要打的是55-JUMBO Yeah, you want 55-JUMBO. 对 Yeah. 没错 That's right. 没错 先生 有"U"的那个"JUMBO" That's right. "JUMBO" with a U, sir. 您要的不是我 Heh. No, you don't want me. 以他的电话号码来判断 我会让您很失望 Judging by his number, I'd be a huge disappointment. 对 好的 再见 Yeah. Alrighty, bye-bye. - 嘿 第一天上班的感觉怎样？ - 嘿 - Hey, hey. How was the first day? - Hey. Oh. 很棒 大家都对我很好 Excellent. Everyone was so, so nice. 看吧？认识一个能穿我鞋子的人是有好处的 See? It pays to know the man who wears my shoes. - 就是我啦 - 啊 - Me. - Ah. - 我没跟人说我本来就认识你 - 为什么？ - I didn't tell anybody that I knew you. - Why not? 因为 嗯… Well, because, you know. 他们不喜欢你 They don't like you. - 什么？ - 你都不知道吗？ - What? - I thought you knew that. 不… Nah-uh. - 谁不喜欢我？ - 大家 - Who doesn't like me? - Everyone. 除了… Except for, um... 不 大家都不喜欢 No. Everyone. - 你在说什么？ - 不要难过 - What are you talking about? - Don't feel bad. 他们以前其实很喜欢你 You know, they used to like you a lot. 但是你升官了 现在你变成老板 But then you got promoted, and now you're all, like, Mr. Boss-Man. 他们叫你宾先生 宾先生 宾老板 You know, Mr. Bing. Mr. Bing. Boss-Man Bing. - 真不敢相信 - 他们还模仿你 - I can't believe it. - Yeah, yeah. They even do you. - 模仿我？ - 对啊 - They do me? - Yeah. 就像这样… You know, like, um, okay: "那份报告可以再拖一点" "Could that report be any later?" 我说话才不是那样 I don't sound like that. - 钱德 - 就是那样 - Oh, oh. Chandler. - Oh. Yeah, you do. "群山在乐声中充满了…" "The hills are alive with the sound... "生气" ...of music." "我的司康松糕 " "My scone!" "我的司康松糕 " "My scone!" 少来 我说话不是那样子 那不是真的 Okay, I don't sound like that. That is so not true. 那不是… 那不是… 那… That is so not... That is so not... That... 你们闭嘴 Oh, shut up. 不会吧 Ha, ha. You did not. 真的 一直到我9岁… I am telling you, up until I was 9... 我都认为枪下就是人犯罪的地方 ...I thought gunpoint was an actual place where crimes happened. - 怎么可能？ - 你想想看 新闻不是一直在播 - Ha, ha. How is that possible? - Think about it. It's always on the news. "一名男子被架在枪下" "A man is being held up at Gunpoint." "观光客枪下惊魂" "Tourists are being terrorized at Gunpoint." 我一直很疑惑 "为什么大家还是继续去那里？" And I just kept thinking, "Why do people continue to go there?" 噢 Oh, ah. - 我得走了 - 好吧 - I should go. - Okay. 好 Okay. - 除非… - 什么？ - Unless... - What? 你想在这里过夜 Uh, unless you wanna stay over. 我得在这里过夜 所以… I mean, I'm going to. So... 好啊 我很愿意 Yeah, I'd really like that. 在真正开始过夜之前… Uh, before we get into any staying-over stuff... 有些事要先让你知道 ...there's something you should know. 好 是类似"我明天早上有一堂很早的课"的事… Okay. Is this like "I have an early class tomorrow"... 还是"我已经跟一头山羊结婚了"？ ...or "I'm secretly married to a goat"? 介于两者之间 Well, it's somewhere in between. 严格来说 我不算是… You see, in a strictly technical sense, of course, I'm not, uh... 我是说 我从来没有… Well, I mean, I haven't ever, um... - 伊森？ - 什么事？ - Ethan? - Yeah? 你是处男吗？ Are you a virgin? 如果这是你们这些孩子现代的说法… Well, if that's what you kids are calling it these days... 那 对 我算是 ...then yes, I am. 我一直在等待对的人出现 I, uh... I've kind of been waiting for the right person. - 真的吗？ - 真的 - Really? - Yeah. 你知道我是指你吧？ You do know I was talking about you, right? 哇 Wow. 你一直哇哇哇 You keep saying that. 这在书上看过 电影上也有 You know, you read about it. You see it in the movies. 就算在家里自己练习过 但是 天啊… Even when you practice it at home, man, oh, man... 感觉完全不同 ...it is nothing like that. 哦 Oh. 等一下 听着 Listen, listen. 你告诉一件 对你来说很难启齿的事 Um, you told me something that was really difficult for you. 我想 既然你可以对我说实话 我也可以对你说实话 And, um, well, I figure if you can be honest, then I can too. - 天啊 不要告诉我我做错了 - 不是 - Oh, God, don't tell me I did it wrong. - No. - 不是 不是… - 哦 - No, no, no. - Oh. - 完全正确 - 噢… - Nothing wrong about that. - Oh. Ha, ha. 好 是这样的 Um, okay. Here goes. 我不是22岁 I'm not 22. 我25… I'm 25. 又13个月 And 13 months. 唔 Huh. 但是我想 这不应该有什么影响吧 But I figure, you know, that shouldn't change anything. 我们的年龄不是什么问题吧 对不对？ I mean, what the hell does it matter how old we are? 嗯… Listen, um... 既然我们开始说实话了… ...as long as we're telling stuff, uh... 我还有一件事要告诉你 ...I have another one for you. 我比当初说的要小一点 I'm a little younger than I said. 你不是在念最后一年了吗？ You're not a senior? 我是最后一年… Oh, I'm a senior. 高中最后一年 In high school. 好吧 Okay. 我们做的事大错特错 What we did was wrong. 天啊 刚刚跟我上床的人 美国两百周年国庆时还不存在 Oh, God. I just had sex with someone who wasn't alive during the bicentennial. 我刚破处 I just had sex. 伊森 专心一点 你怎么不早点说？ Ethan, focus. How could you not tell me? - 你也没告诉我你多大 - 那不一样 - You never told me how old you were. - That's different. 我的谎话不会让我在48州都成为通缉犯 My lie didn't make one of us a felon in 48 states. - 你有没有在用大脑？ - 我没在用大脑 我忙着… - What were you thinking? - I wasn't thinking. I was busy falling... - 不要说出来 - 爱上你 - Don't say it. - ...in love with you. 真的吗？ Really? 对不起 Sorry. 不要再爱我了 Well, fall out of it. 你根本不该在这里 明天还要上学 You know, you shouldn't even be here. It's a school night. 天啊 天啊 Oh, God. Oh, God. 我和那些专找乳臭未干的小子的女人没两样 I'm like those women that you see with shiny guys named Chad. 我是琼•考琳斯 I'm Joan Collins. 谁啊？ Who? 好吧 安德烈45分钟后就会回来 Okay, Andre should be there in about 45 minutes. 好的 再见 Alrighty. Bye-bye. 这样比较干脆 Ahem. It's just easier that way. 好啦 上次做的梦 你就肯说 Oh, come on. You told me about the last dream. 不要 不告诉你 No. Forget it. 为什么？我是不是做了什么特别销魂蚀骨的事？ Well, why not? Was I doing something particularly saucy? 好啦 好啦 All right, fine. Um... 当时不只有你 Well, you were not the only one there. 乔伊也在 Joey was there too. 好 All right. 还有… Was there, uh, heh... 别人吗？ ...anybody else there? - 没有 - 你确定？ - No. - You sure? 没有人在发薄荷糖之类的吗？ Nobody, uh, handing out mints or anything? 没有 就我们三个 No, it was just the three of us. 噢 Oh. 那么 是你先跟钱德 然后再你和我… So tell me, was it like you and Chandler and then you and me... 还是你 我和钱德都在一起？ ...or you and me and Chandler? - 你知道吗？ - 什么？ - You know what? - What? 有时候… There were times... 根本没有我 ...when it wasn't even me. 好甜蜜哦 你们两个 That is so sweet, you guys. 嘿 摩妮卡 Hey, Mon. Mon. 摩妮卡 伊森又打电话来了 Mon, Ethan called again. 摩妮卡？ Mon? 摩妮卡 Mon! - 干嘛？ - 伊森又打电话来了 - What? - Ethan called again. 哦 Oh. - 你不跟他交往啦？ - 不了 - You're not seeing him anymore? - No. 有时候 两个人就是没办法在一起 You know, sometimes just things don't work out. 这个跟他连络簿上要有家长签名才能不去上体育课有关吗？ And this has nothing to do with the fact that he needs a note to get out of gym? 我没说… 我什么都没说 我发誓 I didn't say any... I did not say anything, I swear. 他跑来看你 He stopped by. 改天你跟他说话的时候… Next time you talk to him... 能不能问他哪个金刚战士威力最强大？ ...could you ask him which one the strongest Power Ranger is? 哈哈 我的人生真是好笑 大家可以闭嘴了吗？ Oh, my life is just so amusing. Heh, heh. Can we drop it now? 抱歉 抱歉 Sorry. Sorry. 金刚合体 It's morphing time. - 剑龙 - 暴龙 - Stegosaurus! - Tyrannosaurus! 我要走了 Ooh. Oh, I gotta go. 头晕 Whoa. Ooh, head rush. Oh. 再来一次 我就得出发了 One more and then I have to go. 酷 Cool. Ha, ha. 你要去哪里？ Where you going? 有同事要开生日派对 Oh, I got a birthday party with some work people. 同事？ Work people? - 都没人告诉我 - 对啊 我知道 - Nobody told me. - No, I know. 这个跟他们不喜欢你有很大的关系 That's part of the whole, you know, them-not-liking-you extravaganza. 我不懂 这些人一个月前都还是我的朋友 Know what? I don't get this. A month ago, these people were my friends. 现在我换了位置 不表示我的脑袋也换了 Just because I'm in charge, doesn't mean I'm a different person. 那你应该一起来 跟大家聊聊 Well, then you should come tonight, just hang out with them. 让他们看看你还是跟以前一样好玩好相处 Let them see what a great guy you still are. - 你觉得我应该去吗？ - 对啊 真的 - You think I should? - I really do, yeah. - 好 好吧 - 好 - Okay. Okay. - Okay. 但是 我们能不能不要一起出现？ Oh, but, um, could we not go together? 我不想当那个邀上司一起来的怪胎 I don't wanna be the geek who invited the boss, you know? 昨晚真是好玩 I think last night was great. 还唱卡啦OK？翠西跟我合唱《黑檀木与白象牙》？ You know, the karaoke thing? Tracy and I doing "Ebony and lvory"? - 嗯… - 哈 - Mm-hm. - Ha, ha. 你很受欢迎 但是他们私底下还是会笑你 You were great. But they still made fun of you. - 什么？ - 现在你成了关心下属先生 - What? - Now you're more like Mr. Caring-Boss. "我们可以同乐" 老板 Mr. "I'm-One-of-You"-Boss. "我想跟你们一起混"的宾老板 Mr. "I-Wanna-Be-Your-Buddy"- Boss-Man-Bing. 这我就搞不清楚了 Then I don't get it. 你知道吗 钱德？我想你得面对现实 Well, you know what, Chandler? I think you just gotta face it. 你现在是那个有大办公室的人了 You're, like, the guy in the big office, you know? 你是那个操纵他们生死大权的的人了 You're the one that hires them and fires them. - 他们还是觉得你是个好上司 - 真的吗？ - They still say you're a great boss. - They do? 嗯 Uh-huh. 但是他们已经不是你的朋友了 But they're not your friends anymore. - 但是我只想要… - 但是你不行 - But I just want to... - No, but you can't. - 但是我只想要… - 啊哈 - But I just want... - Ah-ah. 你不…？ Aren't you gonna...? 卡萝跟我约好了 Oh, Carol and I have a new system. 如果她打来 留下"911"就表示她要生了 If she punches in "911," it means she's having a baby. - 其他的我都不管了 - 那安德烈怎么办？ - Otherwise, I just ignore it. - What about Andre? 今天早上他接到 我觉得好像是我们表哥纳森的电话 This morning he got a call from what I think was our cousin Nathan. 说真的 我不想知道那么多 And frankly, it was a little more than I needed to know. 嘿 Hey. 我本来想抢先讲的 That was gonna be my opener. 嘿 你们看过厕所里面新的干手机吗？ Hey, did you guys check out those new hand dryers in the bathroom? - 我以为那只是传闻 - 真的有 - I thought that was just a rumor. - True story. 有件事我得告诉你 All right, look, I gotta tell you something. 我不是17岁 I'm not 17. 我说我17岁 这样才会让你感觉我可爱又脆弱 I only said that so you'd think I was cute and vulnerable. 我已经30了 I'm actually 30. 我有老婆 有工作 是你选区的国会议员 I have a wife. I have a job. I'm your congressman. 摩妮卡 这太离谱了 我们在一起很快乐 Monica, this is ridiculous. We are great together. 我们很有话聊 能逗对方笑 性生活 天啊 太美满了 We can talk, we make each other laugh. And the sex. Oh, man. 好 我是没得比较 但是我觉得很棒 Okay, I have no frame of reference, but I thought that was great. - 是很棒 - 那么问题在哪里？ - It was. - Then what's the problem? 伊森 这让人… Ethan, it's, um... 太肉麻了 It's icky. 肉麻？ Icky? 就因为你觉得肉麻 就要放弃这段感情？ You're actually gonna throw this away because it's icky? 真的 我也很难受 Look, this isn't easy for me either. 我也希望情况不是这样 I wish things were different. 要是你大几岁 还是我小几岁… If you were a few years older or I was a few years younger... 或是我们活在《圣经》时代… ...or we lived in biblical times... - 我就可以… - 不要说出来 - ...I could really... - No, don't say it. 爱你 Love you. - 你们手干了吗？ - 还是湿湿的 - Are your hands still wet? - They're moist. - 对啊 - 我们再去烘一下 - Yeah, right? Ahem. - Let's dry them again. 还有 "这玛格莉特调酒 可以再烈一点" Or, like, "Could these margaritas be any stronger?" - 嘿 钱德 - 你好 宾先生 - Hey, Chandler. - Hello, Mr. Bing. 你模仿史蒂夫•汪德真是惟妙惟肖 Loved your Stevie Wonder last night. 谢谢 每周报告我需要在… Thanks. Listen, about the weekly numbers, I'm gonna need them on my desk... 9点前看到 ...by 9:00. - 当然 - 没问题 - Sure. - No problem. 让他们忙一点是有必要的 你知道吧？ You have to give them something, you know? 好 那是葛斯顿 山多斯 那个有小胡子的是谁？ Okay, that was Gerston, Santos, and who's the guy with the mustache? - 彼崔 - 彼崔 对 对 好 - Petrie. - Petrie. Right, right, okay. 有人这个周末… Well, some people are gonna be working... 要赶工了 ...this weekend. 好舒服哦 Oh, that's nice. 罗斯 Ross. - 罗斯？ - 我在这里 - Ross? - I'm here. 你在这里？ You are? 嗯… Uh... Ahem. 我们刚刚正在… We were just... - 哇 - 怎么了？ - Wow. - What? 太好了 现在宝宝要出生了 Heh. Great. Now I'm having a baby. - 什么？ - 噢 - What? - Oh! - 宝宝要… 宝宝要出生了 - 噢… - No. I'm having... I'm having a baby! - Oh. Oh! - 天啊 - 宝宝要… - Oh, my God. - I'm having a...! - 电话 电话 - 电话 电话不在我这边 - The phone, the phone! - The phone. I don't have the phone. Aah! - 罗斯？ - 好痛 - Ross? - I'm hurt. 摩妮卡 快点 动作快 有人要生了 Monica, let's go. Come on, now, people. Woman in labor. - 嘿 罗斯 你看我会这样 - 车上再说 可以吗？ - Hey, Ross, look what I got going here. - Yeah, save it for the cab, okay? 你在干什么？我们是要去医院 What are you doing? We're going to a hospital. 怎么？我不能打扮一下吗？那边也许有很多医生 What, so I can't look nice? There might be doctors there. - 乔伊 不要再翻冰箱了 - 好啦 好啦 - Joey, get out of the fridge. - All right, all right. - 那是什么？ - 车上吃的 - What is that? - For the ride. - 是啦 在计程车上… - 待会儿再说 - Yeah, like in a cab you... - Save it. - 这样很讨厌 - 摩妮卡 快点 我们要走了 - Okay, hating this. - Monica, come on, now. Let's go. 宝宝快出来了 天啊 Baby coming. God. 真不敢相信我要当姑姑了 I can't believe it. I'm gonna be an aunt. - 那真是… - 我快要有侄儿了 - Oh, that's... - I'm gonna have a nephew. 真感人 快滚 Oh, that's nice. Get out. - 快点 - 我们快走 快点 - Come on. - Let's go, come on. 好啦 好啦 Okay. Okay. 好啦 好啦 在走了 在走了 All right, all right, I'm going, I'm going. - 冷静 - 罗斯 冷静 乖 - Here we go. Here we go. - Rossy. Rossy. # Friends.S01E23.1994.BluRay.1080p.x265.10bit.MNHD-FRDS.txt 强森医生 七线有您电话 Dr. Johnson, you have a call on line 7. 她还没到… 我孩子的妈妈还没到 She's not here yet. She's having my baby and she's not here. - 我相信没事的 羊水破了吗？ - 我不知道 - Everything's fine. Has her water broken? - I don't know. 我们说话的时候 她说黏液栓子已经脱落了 But when I spoke to her, she said she'd already passed the mucus plug. 我们一定要知道这个吗？ Do we have to know about that? 乔伊 如果你小孩要生了怎么办？ What are you gonna do when you have a baby? 我会在候诊室分送雪茄 I'm gonna be in the waiting room, handing out cigars. 我猜乔伊安排了在50年代的电影生小孩 Yes, Joey's made arrangements to have his baby in a movie from the '50s. 我不敢相信 她有可能生在计程车上 Aah, I don't believe this. I mean, she could be giving birth in the cab. 罗斯 别紧张 Oh, Ross, relax. 第一次阵痛可能只要2块钱 It's only like $2 for the first contraction... 然后每次阵痛跳表5毛钱 ...and then 50 cents each additional contraction. 怎样 钱德开玩笑就无所谓？ What, it's okay when Chandler does it? 你要会选时间 You have to pick your moments. - 我错过了吗？ - 她还没到 - Hi. Did I miss it? Did I miss it? - No, she's not even here yet. - 哦 - 你背吉他干嘛？ - Oh. - What's with the guitar? 我们可能要在这待一会儿 或许用得上音乐 I just thought we might be here for a while, so, you know, things might get musical. - 你们去哪里了？ - 我们去了礼品店 - Hey, where the hell have you been? - We stopped at the gift shop. 我买了玩偶 苏珊买了强奇巧克力棒 I was looking at stuffed animals, and Susan wanted a Chunky. 你要生小孩了 买什么强奇巧克力？ Susan wanted a... You're having a baby. A baby. You don't stop for Chunkys. - 我以前有那种保险秆贴纸 - 哈 - I used to have that bumper sticker. - Ha, ha. 你们懂我的意思吧？ You see what I mean? - 还买巧克力 - 算了吧 罗斯 - "Stopped for a Chunky." - Let it go, Ross. 我有多的 你要吗？ I got an extra one. You want this? 不要 No. 嘿 我最喜欢的父母档如何？ Hey, how's my favorite parenting team doing? 法兰兹布劳医生 Dr. Franzblau. Hi. 我知道你们想生小孩 So I understand you're thinking of having a baby. 哇 Wow. 你怀孕了9个月 那是很好的开始 I see you're nine months pregnant. That's a good start. - 你的阵痛如何？ - 我很喜欢 - How you doing with your contractions? - Oh, I love them. 每次都像有人在我的子宫狂欢 Each one's like a little party in my uterus. 间隔4分钟 持续55秒 Ha, ha. They're every four minutes and last 55 seconds. 是59秒 石英表 Fifty-nine seconds. Quartz. Ha. 端士石英表 Swiss quartz. Ha, ha. - 我能喝东西吗？ - 可以吃冰块 - Am I allowed to drink anything? - Ice chips, just ice chips. - 护士站有 - 我去拿 - They're at the nurses' station. - I'll get them. - 不 我去拿 - 不 我要去了 - No, I'm getting it. Be right back. - No, I got it. I'm getting it. 嗨 我在想你可能想要冰块 Hi. Thought you might like some ice chips. 谢谢 Thanks. 如果有任何需要 我… And if you need anything else, I... 我想我们没有见过 你好 ...do not believe we have met. Hi. 我是瑞秋•葛林 I'm Rachel Green. 我是卡萝前夫妹妹的室友 I'm Carol's ex-husband's sister's roommate. Ha, ha. 幸会 我是法兰兹布劳医生 It's nice to meet you. I'm Dr. Franzblau. 我是你室友哥哥前妻的产科医师 I'm your roommate's brother's ex-wife's obstetrician. 喔 好好笑 Oh, that's funny. 我想要个小孩 I want a baby. 今晚不行 宝贝 明天我要早起 Hmm. Not tonight, honey. I got an early day tomorrow. 起来 我们去倒杯咖啡 Get up. Come on, let's get some coffee. 好吧 因为我们从没这么做过 Oh, okay, because we never do that. 投篮… Shoot, shoot, shoot. 或者不投 那也可以 Or just fall down. That's good too. - 尼克队粉丝？ - 对 - Knick fan? - Oh, yeah. - 喔 天啊 他们真烂 - 听着 小姐… - Oh, boy, do they suck. - Hey, listen, lady, I... 哇哦 Whoa. 你看 看看你的尤恩 投得好 Look. Look at your man Ewing. Nice shot. 要是在船上 他连水都碰不到 You know, he couldn't hit water if he was standing on a boat. 是吗？那你喜欢谁？ Oh, yeah? And who do you like? - 塞尔蒂克队 - 塞尔蒂克队？ - Celtics. - Celtics? Ha! 他们连船都… 等等… They couldn't hit a boat if... Wait. 他们很烂 好吗？ They suck, all right? 闭嘴 人家有在重建… Shut up. You know, it's a rebuilding year. You... - 啊哈 - 噢 - Aah! Aah! - Oh. Aah. 我去叫爸爸 嘿 Uh, let me get the father. Hey! 宝宝的爸爸快点来 We need a father over here! We need a father! 没有爸爸 There's no father. 哦 Oh. Oh. 喔 抱歉 Oh, sorry. 没关系 我没事 Oh, that's okay. I'm fine. I'm... - 哦 - 噢… - Oh! - Oh, uh... 好的 来这边 Okay. All right. Uh, right this way. 其他的孕妇好像都走进这里 All the other pregnant women seem to be going in here. 好 Okay. 他们小小胖胖的 让人爱不释手 They're tiny and chubby. And so sweet to touch 很快他们长大成人 对你憎恨不已 But soon they'll grow up And resent you so much 对你大呼大叫让你感到不解 Now they're yelling at you And you don't know why 惹你伤心落泪 And you cry and you cry and you cry - 谢了 罗斯 - 我付钱是请你别唱了 - Thanks, Ross. - Yeah. I'm paying you to stop. 好吧 Okay. 喔 快看 是双胞胎 喔 好可爱喔 Oh, look, twins. Hi, guys. Oh, cute, cute. 不公平 我一个都没有 为什么她有两个？ No fair. I don't even have one. How come they get two? - 有一天你会有的 - 是吗？什么时候？ - You'll get one. - Oh, yeah? When? 这么说好了 I'll tell you what. 如果我们俩到了40岁都还没结婚 When we're 40, if neither of us are married... 你说我们俩一起生一个好不好？ ...what do you say you and I have one? 我为何到40岁还没结婚？ Why won't I be married when I'm 40? 喔 不… 我只是说假设 Oh, no, no, no. I just meant hypothetically. 好吧 那假设性的说 我为何到40还没嫁人？ Okay, hypothetically, why won't I be married when I'm 40? - 不是 不是 - 为什么？ - No, no, no. - No, no, what is it? Seriously. 我有什么原因嫁不出去吗？ Is there something fundamentally unmarriable about me? - 呃… - 说啊？ - Uh... Uh... - Well? 老天 这降落伞根本是个背包 Dear God. This parachute is a knapsack. - 嘿 - 嘿 - Hey. - Hey. Ooh. - 喔 看看你穿这么美 - 嗯 - Look at you, dressy-dress. - Yeah. 你回家换衣服？ Did you go home and change? 这是重要的日子 我想美美的 Yeah, well, it's an important day. I wanna look nice. 法兰兹布劳医生来了吗？ Um, has Dr. Franzblau been by? 我没见到他 No, I haven't seen him. 那他在哪？他应该在这的 Well, where is he? He is supposed to be here. 如果宝宝需要他怎么办？ What if the baby needs him? 瑞秋 你迷恋医生是怎么回事？ Rachel, what is the deal with you and doctors? - 你父亲是医生吗？ - 是啊 为什么？ - Is, like, your father a doctor? - Yeah. Why? 没什么 No reason. 妈妈 我们说过了 Mom, we've been through this. 不 我不要打给他 No, I am not calling him. 我不在乎他是孩子的爹 他是混蛋 I don't care if it is his kid. The guy's a jerk. 不 我不是一个人 乔伊在这 No, I am not alone. Joey's here. 什么叫 "哪个乔伊"？ What do you mean, "Joey who?" 哪个乔伊？ Joey who? - 崔比亚尼 - 乔伊•崔比亚尼 - Tribbiani. - Joey Tribbiani. 是的 好 等一下 Yes. Okay. Hold on. - 她要跟你说话 - 不 - She wants to talk to you. - No. 电话拿去 Take the phone. 喂 是 是我 Hi. Yeah, it's me. 不 我们只是朋友 Oh, no, no, no. We're just friends. Yeah. 是 我是单身 Yeah, I'm single. 25岁 Twenty-five. 演员 An actor. 喂？ Hello? - 她不太懂电话礼仪 - 是啊 - She's not much of a phone person. - Yeah. 所以 孩子的爸做了什么？ So, uh, what's the deal with this father guy? 如果有人怀了我的孩子 我会想要知道的 I mean, if someone was having my baby somewhere, I'd wanna know about it. 尼克队迷 我有兴趣知道你对为人父的想法吗？不 Hey, Knick fan, am I interested in your views on fatherhood? Um, no. 好吧 或许我该走了 Okay. Uh, look, maybe I should just go. - 或许是 - 祝你好运 - Maybe you should. - Good luck. 保重 And, uh, take care, huh? 你知道塞尔蒂克队的问题吗？他们让球员管理球队 Know what the Celtics' problem is? They let the players run the team. 才不是那样 Oh, that is so not true. - 就是那样 - 不是 - Oh, it is. It is. - It isn't. Isn't. - 呼吸 - 呼吸 - Breathe. Breathe. Breathe. - Breathe. Breathe. Breathe. 我受不了了 You're gonna kill me! - 再15秒 14 13 12… - 数快一点 - Fifteen more seconds. Fourteen, 13, 12... - Count faster. 没事的 这一切都是为了乔弟 想着他就好 It's gonna be okay. We're doing it for Jordy. Keep focusing on Jordy. 乔弟到底是谁？ Who the hell is Jordy? - 你儿子 - 哇… - Your son. - Whoa, whoa whoa. 我儿子不叫乔弟 I don't have a son named Jordy. 我们说好要叫洁米的 We all agreed, my son's name is Jamie. 苏珊的第一任女友也叫洁米 Well, Jamie was the name of Susan's first girlfriend... 所以我们改回乔弟 ...so we went back to Jordy. 哇… Whoa, whoa, whoa. 你说什么改回乔弟？我们从没谈过乔弟这名字 What do you mean, "back to Jordy"? We never landed on Jordy. 在整个取名字的失败过程 我们压根没提过 We just passed by it during the whole Jesse/Cody/Dillon fiasco. 噢 噢… Ow, ow, ow! - 怎么了？ - 喔 小腿抽筋 - What? What? What? - Leg cramp, leg cramp. - 我来 - 我来 我在弄了 - I got it. I got it. - I got it. I'm doing it. 你能跟她睡觉 小腿给我 You get to sleep with her. I get the cramps. 不 我来 No, you don't. - 够了 你们都出去 - 什么？ - That is it. I want both of you out. - What? - 她开始的 - 是他 - She started it. - He started it. 我不管 I don't care. 我努力想把一个人从身体生出来 I'm trying to get a person out of my body here... 你们这不是在帮我 现在出去 ...and you're not making it any easier. Now go! - 太感谢了 - 看你干的好事 - Thanks a lot. - See what you did? - 听我说… - 出去 - Yeah. Listen... - Out. 呼吸 呼吸 呼吸 Breathe. Breathe. Breathe. 喔 不 Oh, no. 呃 Ew. 那是什么？有东西爆出来了 What is that? Something exploded. 她只是羊水破了 冷静点 It's just her water breaking. Calm down, will you? 羊水破了？什么意思？那是什么？ Water breaking? What do you mean? What's that, water breaking? 呼吸… Breathe. Breathe. Breathe. - 拜托 都是你的错 - 为何是我的错？ - Oh, please. This is so your fault. - How? How is this my fault? 在你出现以前 卡萝从没把我赶出门过 Look, Carol never threw me out of a room before you came along. 我还没出现之前 卡萝有很多事没做过 Well, there's a lot of things Carol never did before I came along. - 你是在耍聪明？ - 你觉得我威胁到你… - Are you trying to be clever? - You are so threatened by me. - 所有的事都不太对 - 嘿 好了 够了 - Everything I say is a problem. - Hey, hey, hey. Okay. All right. 进去里面 That's it. Get in here. Come on. 天啊 你们两个 我真不敢相信 My God, you guys. I don't believe you. 这里有孩子等着出世 There are children coming into the world in this very building... 他们该听到的第一个声音 不是你们负面的争吵 ...and your fighting noises are not the first thing they should be hearing. 所以你们别吵了 闭嘴 So just stop all the yelling! Just stop it! 对 苏珊 Yeah, Susan. 别逼我再这么做 我不喜欢拉高嗓音 Don't make me do this again! I don't like my voice like this! 谁想听听一件无奈的事？ Okay, who wants to hear something ironic? 快来人啊 Help! - 拜托 - 快来人啊 - Come on! - Help! - 我的孩子要生了 - 哈罗 - I'm having a baby in there! - Hello? - 来人啊 - 好吧 大家拄后退 - Help! - Okay, everyone stand back. 噢 Ow. 他…们…到…了没？ Are they here yet? 还没 你别担心 我们会找到他们的 No, honey, but don't worry, we're gonna find them. 在找到之前 我们都在这 好吗？ And until we do, we are all here for you, okay? - 好 - 好喔 - Okay. Okay. - Okay? 你刚说巴黎 那听起来很棒 Anyway, you were telling me about Paris. It sounds wonderful. 有一家很棒的点心店 就在我饭店旁边 It really was. There was this great little pastry shop right by my hotel... 很好 亲爱的 There you go, dear. You... 加油 莉蒂雅 你可以的 Come on, Lydia, you can do it. Push. 用力挤… 用力… Push him out, push him out. Harder, harder. 用力挤… 出来 Push him out, push him out. Way out. 我们抢球的动作要快 Let's get that ball and really move. Hey, hey. Ho, ho. 我们… Let's get... 我只是… 好吧 I was just... Yeah, okay. 用力… Push, push, push. 你要干嘛？把门吸开？ What are you gonna do, suck the door open? - 来人啊… - 来人啊 - Help! Help! Help! - Help! 他们在隔天找到他们的尸体 And they found their bodies The very next day 他们在隔天找到他们的… And they found their bodies The very next... 啦啦… La, la, la, la, la, la 来人啊 Help! 妈妈 一切都很顺利 罗斯很好 他… No, Mom, everything's going fine, really. Yeah, Ross is great. He's, uh... 他在另外一个地方 不 他走了 He's in a whole other place. Yeah. No, he's gone. 不 你不需要飞回来 真的 No, no, you don't have to fly back. Really. 什么叫 "这可能是你唯一的机会"？ What do you mean, this might be your only chance? 别说了好吗？我才26岁 Oh. Would you stop? I'm only 26. 我都还没想到孩子的事 I'm not even thinking about babies yet. - 你去哪了？ - 刚生了个孩子 - Where have you been? - Oh, I just had a baby. 恭喜了 Mazel tov. 我不知道 有可能是1小时或3小时 I don't know. It could be an hour, it could be three. 但放轻松点 她很好 But relax, she's doing great. 所以 你最近有跟人交往吗？ So, uh, tell me, are you currently involved with anyone? 没有 现在没有 没有 No. No, not at... At the moment, no, I'm not, no. - 你呢？ - 不 - Are you? - No, no. 要找女人跟我约会很难 It's hard enough to get women to go out with me. 是啊 帅的医生都这样 Heh. Right, yeah, I've heard that about cute doctors. 不 是真的 No, no, really. 我猜是因为我花很多时间… I suppose it's because I spend so much time, you know... 在我的工作上 ...where I do. - 哦 - 嗯 - Oh. - Mm. 我试着不让工作影响我个人生活 但那很难 I try not to let work affect my personal life, but it's hard when you do... 做我这样的事就像… ...what I do. It's like, uh... 好吧 比如说 你做哪一行？ Well, for instance, what do you do? - 我是服务生 - 好吧 - I'm a waitress. - Okay, all right. 难道你没有 当你很晚回到家 Well, aren't there times when you come home at the end of the day... 会不想再见到任何一杯咖啡的经验？ ...and you're just like, "If I see one more cup of coffee..." 对 我懂 Ahem. Yeah. Gotcha. - 我去看看你的朋友 - 好的 没问题 - I'm gonna check up on your friend. - Okay, that's fine. - 你怎么知道我在这？ - 你妈妈打电话给我 - So how did you know I was even here? - Your mom called me. 所以这就是她？ So is this her? 不 这是借来的 No, this is a loaner. 很抱歉我让你孤单分娩 Listen, I'm sorry you had to do this by yourself. 我不孤单 我有医生 护士 还有个善心男士 Oh. I wasn't by myself. I had a doctor, a nurse and a helper guy. 你知道谁赢了比赛吗？ So did you see who won the game? 尼克队赢了10分 他们很烂 Yeah, Knicks by 10. They suck. 他们也没那么烂啦 Eh, they're not so bad. 拜托… Come on. Come on. 该死… 都是你的错 Damn it, damn it, damn it. This is all your fault. 这应该是我生命中最美好的一天 This is supposed to be, like, the greatest day of my life. 我儿子要出生了 我应该在场的 My son is being born, and I should be in there, you know? 而不是跟你困在柜子里 Instead I'm stuck in a closet with you. 我爱的女人要生了 我跟你一样期待这一天 I've been waiting for this just as much as you have. 相信我 没有人像我这么期待这天的 Believe me, no one has been waiting for this as much as I have, okay? 你知道好笑的是什么吗？ And you know what the funny thing is? 生完后 孩子可以跟你回去 When this day is over, you get to go home with the baby. - 而我剩什么？ - 你是孩子的父亲 - Where does that leave me? - You get to be the father. 大家都知道你是谁 我算什么？有父亲节 母亲节 Everyone knows who you are. Who am I? There's Father's Day. There's Mother's Day. 没有女同志情人节 There's no Lesbian Lover Day. 每天都是女同志情人节 Every day is Lesbian Lover Day. 这真是太棒了 This is so great. 解释一下好吗？ You wanna explain that? 我是说 我小时候 父亲就丢下我 I mean, well, because when I was growing up, you know, my dad left... 我母亲死了 而我继父去坐牢 ...and my mother died, and my stepfather went to jail. 我几乎没有任何父母亲的疼爱 So I barely had enough pieces of parents to make one whole one. 而这个宝宝有三个父母 And here's this little baby who has like three whole parents... 他们是如此关心他 还为此争吵谁最爱他 ...who care about it so much that they fight over who gets to love it the most... 宝宝甚至还没出生呢 ...and it's not even born yet. 他是世上最幸运的宝宝 It's just the luckiest baby in the whole world. 对不起 你们在吵架 I'm sorry. You were fighting. 他们在哪？ Where are they? - 他们很快就会来的 - 他们不会错过这一刻的 - I'm sure they'll be here soon. - They wouldn't miss this. 放轻松 你只开了9公分 宝宝还不会出来 Relax. You're only at nine centimeters, and the baby's at zero station. 你真令我感到害怕 Okay, you are really frightening me. 救救我好吗？有人要挖出我的心脏 Somebody wanna help me? Trying to rip out my heart. 太好了 有人看到奶头吗？ Uh... Oh, that's great. Anybody seen a nipple? 10公分了 开始了 All right. Ten centimeters. Here we go. - 甜心 要开始用力了 - 但他们还没到 - All right, honey, time to start pushing. - But they're not here yet. 抱歉 宝宝不能等的 Sorry, I can't tell the baby to wait for them. 喔 天啊 Oh, God. 好了 通气孔打开了 Okay, got the vent open. 嗨 我是班 Hi, I'm Ben. 我是医院工作员班 I'm hospital worker Ben. 班要去救援了 It's Ben to the rescue. - 啦… - 好… - La, la, la - Okay, okay, okay. - 班 你好了没？ - 好了 - Ben, you ready? - Yeah. - 脚踩上来 - 好 - All right, give me your foot. - Okay. - 数到3 班 1 2 3 - 噢 - Okay, on three, Ben. One, two, three. Unh. - Ooh. - 加油 班 就是这样 班 - 好了 - Come on, Ben. Okay. That's it, Ben. - Okay. Uh-huh. 你看到什么？ What do you see? 苏珊 看来像是黑黑的通气孔 Well, Susan, I see what appears to be a dark vent. 等等 Wait. 是的 没错 是黑黑的通气孔 Yes, it is, in fact, a dark vent. 菲比 门开了… Pheebs, it's open! It's open! 等等 你们的脚还在这 Wait! You forgot your legs! - 用力… - 我们来了… - Push. Push. - We're here! - 我们来了 - 你们死哪儿去了？ - We're here. - Where have you been?! 这故事很长 Long story, honey. 我要你继续用力 All right, Carol, I need you to keep pushing. 我需要… 对不起 我要拿这个 I need... Excuse me, can I have this? 抱歉 Oh, sorry. 好… All right, all right. 太多人在这了 而且又有一个要出来 There's too many people in this room. There's about to be one more. 如果不是前夫或女同志伴侣的人 请出去 So anybody who's not an ex-husband or a lesbian life partner, out you go. - 快点 出去 - 祝你好运 - Come on, out. - Okay, good luck. - 再见 - 祝你们幸运 - Bye, bye, bye. - Good luck, you guys, good luck. 请问一下 一定要是卡萝的女同志伴侣才行吗？ Let me ask you, do you have to be Carol's lesbian life partner? 出去 Out. 好了 他要出来了 All right. All right, he's crowning. Here he comes. 让我看 我一定要看 Let me see. I gotta see, I gotta see. 哦… Oh... Oh. 一颗头 Oh! A head. 那好大 卡萝 你如何办到的？ Oh. It's huge. Carol, how are you doing this? 你这不是在帮我 Not helping. 你做得很好 You're doing great. You're doing fine. - 嘿？ - 喔 对不起 - Hello? - Oh, sorry. 你看到什么…？ What do you see? What do you see? 头 肩膀和手臂出来了 We got a head, we got shoulders, we got arms, we got... 喔 看那小小的手指 Oh, look at the little... The fingers. 胸部和肚子… Oh, a chest and a stomach... 是个男孩 货真价实 ...and it's a boy, definitely a boy. 腿 膝盖和脚 All right. Okay, legs, knees and feet. 哦… Oh, oh. 他出来了 He's here. He's... 他是一个人 He's a person. 噢… Oh! - 看啊 - 他看起来像谁？ - Look at that. - What does he look like? 有点像我的叔叔艾德裹着果冻 Kind of like my Uncle Ed, covered in Jell-O. 真的？ Really? 哈罗 他很漂亮 You guys, he's beautiful. 谢了 菲比 Aw, thanks, Pheebs. 别大声叫 但我们还没替宝宝取名字 No shouting, but we still need a name for this little guy. 小班怎么样？ How about Ben? 我喜欢小班 I like Ben. 小班 Ben. - 小班很好 - 是吗？ - Ha, ha. Ben's good. - Yeah? 你之前怎么都没提到？ How come you never mentioned Ben before? - 我们刚刚才想出来的 - 哈 - We, uh, just cooked it up. - Ha, ha. 那就是我们不在这里时 正在做的事 That's what we were off doing. - 嗨 - 嘿 - Hi. - Hey. - 我们可以进来吗？ - 进来… - Can we come in? - Yeah, come in. Come in. 我知道… I know. I know. 各位 我要你们见见一个人 Everybody, there's someone I'd like you to meet. 对 这位是小班 Yeah. This is Ben. - 嗨 小班 - 嗨 小班 - Hi, Ben. - Hi, Ben. - 小班 这是大伙儿 - 嗨 小班 - Ben, this is everybody. - Hey, Ben. 苏珊 他看起来就像你 Susan, he looks just like you. 谢谢 Thanks. Ha, ha. 天啊 我真不敢相信 我们当中有人生了宝宝 Oh, God, I can't believe one of us actually has one of these. 我知道 我还是宝宝 I know. I still am one of these. - 罗斯？ - 怎样？ - Ross? Yeah? 我可以吗？ Can I? 好的 小心头 你要… Okay, the head, the head. You gotta... 嗨 小班 嗨 Hi, Ben. Hi. 我是摩妮卡姑姑 你的姑姑 I'm your Aunt Monica. Yes, I am. 摩妮卡姑姑 I'm your Aunt Monica. 我… I... 我会随时都带口香糖的 I will always have gum. 小班 Ben... 我要你知道有时候我可能 ...I want you to know that there may be some times... 不会在你身边 ...when I may not be around... 像这样 ...like this. 但我总是会回来的 But I'll still always come back... 像这样 ...like this. 而有时候 我可能会离开久一点 And sometimes I may be away longer... 像这样 ...like this. 但我总是会回到你身边的 But I'll still always come back... 就像这样 ...like this. 有时候 我会要你去盗垒 那时我会这样做 And sometimes I'll want you to steal third, and I'll go like this. 他好奇妙 Oh, he is so amazing. 我知道 看看他 Yeah, I know. Look at him. 小班… Ben. 嘿 小班 Hey, Ben. 没反应 我不认为他叫小班 Nothing. I don't think that's his name. 他要闭上眼睛了 看 Oh, look, look, he's closing his eyes. 他张开眼睛了 看 Oh, look, he's opening his eyes. 他的动作不多 对吧？ He doesn't do much, does he? 没错 就是这样了 Nope, this is pretty much it. - 你们要喝咖啡吗？ - 好 - You guys wanna get some coffee? - Yeah. 待会儿再见 All right, I'll see you guys later. 嗨 班 Hi, Ben. - 我爱你 - 嗨 小班 - I love you. - Hi, Ben. 你看 他又要闭上眼睛了 Oh, look, he's closing his eyes again. # Friends.S01E24.1994.BluRay.1080p.x265.10bit.MNHD-FRDS.txt 这张是小班在打瞌睡 Here's little Ben nodding off. 摩妮卡姑姑的小宝贝哟 Aww, look at Aunt Monica's little boy. - 他的发型跟罗斯一样耶 - 给我看 - Look, he's got Ross' haircut. - Oh, let me see. 天啊 他真是超可爱的 Oh, God! Is he just the sweetest thing? 让人想亲遍他全身 You must just want to kiss him all over. 这点子真不赖 That would be nice. - 噗… - 什么？ - Pfft. - Pardon? 没事 我只是在吐气而已 Nothing. Just a little extra air in my mouth. Pfft. 钱德 帮我付一下吧？我再还你钱 Hey, Chan, can you help me out here? I promise I'll pay you back. 好 加上上礼拜的松饼钱 Oh, yeah, right. Including the waffles last week... 你已经欠我… ...you now owe me... 十七块的几百万倍 ...17 jillion dollars. 真的 我这次一定会还你 I will, really, I'll pay you back this time. 你的钱从哪儿来？ Where's the money coming from? 我现在在纽约大学医学院帮忙做研究 I'm helping out at the NYU Med School with some, uh, research. 什么研究？ What kind of research? 就是科学研究嘛 Uh, just, you know, science. 科学 Science. 喔 我好像听过 Yeah, I think I've heard of that. 是不孕症的研究 It's a fertility study. 乔伊 Joey... 请告诉我 你只捐献时间 Please tell me you're only donating your time. 拜托 又没什么大不了的 Come on, you guys. It's not that big a deal. 我只是每隔一天去那边… I just go down there every other day... 做出一点贡献 ...and make my contribution to the project. 两个礼拜就可以赚七百块耶 Hey, but at the end of two weeks, I get $700! 哇 你动几根手指就有钱赚了 Wow, you're gonna be making money hand over fist. 沙拉跟面包都有了 Okay, we got the coleslaw. We got the buns. 还有用可爱的牛跟火鸡做的新鲜绞肉 We've got the ground-up flesh of formally cute cows and turkeys. 男人们来啰 Men are here! 我们来升火 We make fire. 烤肉 Cook meat. 然后用尿把火浇熄 之后就再也不会被邀请了 Then put out fire by peeing, no get invited back! 好可爱喔 Cute, cute. - 梅兰妮打电话来说她会晚点到 - 好 - Oh, Melanie called. She's gonna be late. - Oh, okay. 你们进展如何？ So how are things going with you two? 她快变成你的另一半了没？ Is she becoming your special someone? 我也不知道 她还蛮不错的 I don't know. She's, uh... She's pretty great. 她对你参加科学实验有意见吗？ Yeah? What does she think of your little science project? 你以为我会跟女伴说 我同时也在跟杯子约会吗？ You think I'm gonna tell a girl I like that I'm also seeing a cup? 这家伙说的有道理 The man's got a point. 问题是她真的很想跟我上床 Well, the tough thing is, she really wants to have sex with me. 真是个疯女人 Crazy bitch. 实验还有一个礼拜才结束 根据规定… I still got a week left in the program, and according to the rules... 想拿钱 就不能私底下进行实验 ...if I want to get the money, I'm not allowed to conduct any personal experiments... - 你们知道我的意思吧 - 乔伊 我们一直都懂 - ...if you know what I mean. - Joey, we always know what you mean. - 嘿 - 嘿 - Hey. Hey. 你以为烤肉会烤多久？ How long did you think this barbecue was gonna last? 我要去中国 I'm going to China. 天啊 才刚说一件事… Jeez, you say one thing and, eh... 你要去中国？ You're going to China? 为了博物馆的事 有人发现化石 It's, uh, for the museum. Someone found a bone. 我们想要化石 可是他们不想给我们化石 We want the bone, they don't want us to have it. 所以我要去那边说服他们 都是化石惹的祸 So I'm going to try to persuade them... It's a whole big "bone" thing. 总之我要去一个礼拜 Anyway, I'm gonna be gone for, like, a week. 如果你要联络上我 那是不可能的 这是我的行程 So, uh, if you wanna reach me, you can't. So here's my itinerary. 呃… Um... - 这是我的照片 - 喔 我看看 - Here's a picture of me. - Oh, let me see. 可以叫卡萝时不时拿给小班看吗？这样他才不会忘了我 Could you take it to Carol's now and then and show it to Ben so he doesn't forget me? - 当然 - 嗨 小班 - Yeah. - Hi, Ben. 我是你爸爸 I'm your father. 我是大头 I am The Head! Pahh! 这次的烤肉一定会很好玩 This barbecue's gonna be very fun. 瑞秋在吗？我想在离开前祝她生日快乐 Is Rachel here? Um, I wanted to wish her a happy birthday before I left. - 她跟卡尔出去喝点东西了 - 哦 - Oh, no, she's out having drinks with Carl. - Oh. Heh. 卡尔是谁？ Hey, who's Carl? - 就是在咖啡厅碰到的一个男的 - 不清楚 - The guy she met at the coffeehouse? - No. - 是一个男的 咖啡厅碰到的 - 在咖啡厅碰到的？对 - See, there's this guy she met at... - The coffeehouse? Right. 你知道那个人是谁嘛 So you do know who he is. Heh. 好 我要去跟男生们道别 I'm gonna go say goodbye to the guys. 跟他们说化石的事情 Hey, you know what? Tell them that bone story. - 嗨 - 嘿 - Hi. - Hey. 嘿 Hey. - 我得去中国一趟 - 你是说那个国家吗？ - I have to go to China. - The country? 错 是我妈妈橱柜上的那堆碗盘 No, this big pile of dishes in my Mom's breakfront. 你知道卡尔是谁吗？ Do you guys know who Carl is? 我想想 艾尔文 赛门 席尔多… Let's see. Alvin, Simon, Theodore... 不认识 No. - 瑞秋今晚跟他去喝酒 - 哦 不 - Well, Rachel's having drinks with him. - Oh, no! 她怎么可以这样？而且对你一点兴趣也没有 How can she, when she's never shown interest in you? 忘了她吧 Forget about her. 他说得对 你要忘了她 He's right, man. Please move on. 快点去中国吧 去吃些好吃的中国菜 Go to China. Eat Chinese food. 当然中国人不会说自己吃的是"中国菜" Of course, there they just call it food. 大概吧 我不知道 Yeah? I guess. I don't know. 好吧 那就帮我把这个交给她 好吗？ All right, just give her this for me, okay? 老兄 我们是为了你好 Listen, we're just looking out for you. - 我知道 - 希望你能开心 - I know. - We want you to be happy. 虽然我喝了点啤酒 可是我是爱你的喔 And I may only have a couple beers in me, but I love you, man. 我还在喝第一瓶 I'm still on my first. 我觉得你是个好人 I just think you're nice. 我们是那时候开始经营水果篮生意的 Anyway, that's when me and my friends started this fruit-basket business. 我们称自己为"篮子三剑客" We call ourselves "The Three Basketeers." Ha, ha. 就是 "三剑客" 加上水果 Like "The Three Musketeers," only with fruit. 哦 Oh! 好 Okay. - 你们的汉堡肉要多熟？ - 不 先拆礼物 食物等一等 - How do you like your burgers? - No. Presents first, food later! 等一下 小老虎 Hold on there, tiger. 你还好吧？还撑得下去吗？ How's it going? How you holding up? 不太好 Well, not so good. 她以为我们今晚会进展到全垒打的地步 She thinks tonight's the night we're gonna complete the transaction... 如果你知道… ...if you know what I... 你知道的嘛 And you do. Heh. 你有想过就陪在她身边吗？ So, uh, have you ever thought about being there for her? 什么意思？ What do you mean? 你知道 就是单纯的陪伴在她身边 You know, just be there for her. 我听不懂耶 Not following you. 好好想想吧 Think about it. 我想这个是来自… Okay, I'm guessing this is from... 梅兰妮 谢谢你 Well, thank you, Melanie. - 这个是我送的 - 好的 - Okay, this one right here is from me. - Okay. 好 很轻 Hmm. Ah, it's light. 有沙沙声 是… It rattles. It's... - 拼字游戏随身包 - 嘿 - ...Travel Scrabble. - Ha, ha, hey! 谢谢 Wow. Thank you. 这是乔伊送的 This one's from Joey. 感觉像是书 应该是书 真的是一本书 It feels like a book. I think it's a book. Feels like a book. And it's a book! 是苏西博士 It's Dr. Seuss! 那本书伴我度过许多艰难的日子 That book got me through some tough times. 这男人心中住着一个小孩 There is a little child inside this man. 医生说如果把孩子从他身体里拿走 他会死的 The doctors say if they remove it, he'll die. - 这是谁送的？ - 是罗斯送的 - Who's this from? - That's, uh, Ross'. 啊 Ah. 天啊 Oh, my God. 他还记得 He remembered. 记得什么？ Remembered what? 是几个月前的事了 It was, like, months ago. 我们经过一家古董店 我看到这枚胸针 We were walking by this antique store, and I saw this pin in the window. 我跟他说这枚胸针 跟我小时候奶奶的胸针很像 I told him it was just like one my grandmother had when I was little. 真不敢相信 他竟然还记得 Aw! I can't believe he remembered! 可是你能在飞机上玩那个吗？ Well, sure, but can you play it on a plane? 好美喔 Oh, it's so pretty. - 一定花了他很多钱 - 真是不敢相信 - This must've cost him a fortune. - I can't believe he did this. 你们记得上大学时 罗斯爱上卡萝… Ross? Remember when he fell in love with Carol... 买给她一个超贵的水晶鸭吗？ ...and bought her that ridiculously expensive crystal duck? 你刚说什么？ What did you just say? 水晶鸭 Crystal duck. 不是 不是 No, no, no. 爱上卡萝的那段 The, um... The "love" part? 我的天啊 Oh, my God. 不 不 不 Oh, no, no, no, no. 很好 继续抓头啊 That's good. Just keep rubbing your head. 这样就可以收回你说的话 That'll turn back time. 这真是太难以置信了 This is unbelievable. I mean, this is unbelievable. 是啊 这真是超级大条的事情 I know. This is really, really huge. 不 这是小事 微不足道的超级小事 No, it's not. It's small, it's tiny, it's petite, it's wee. 我们的生活从此面临巨大转变 Uh-uh. I don't think any of our lives will ever be the same ever again. 想办法让这女人闭嘴好吗？ Is there a mute button on this woman? 我觉得这样很棒 你跟罗斯在一起很棒 I think this is so great! I mean, you and Ross! - 你之前知道吗？ - 不知道 - Did you have any idea? - No, none. 我到纽约的第一个晚上 他说过要约我出去… My first night in the city, he mentioned asking me out... 可是一直都没有发生 所以我以为… ...but nothing ever happened, so I just... 他还说了什么？他有说想跟我约会吗？ What else did he say? Does he want to go out with me? 他既然那么爱你… Given that he's desperately in love with you... 应该不介意跟你喝杯咖啡吧 ...he wouldn't mind getting a cup of coffee or something. 罗斯？ Ross? 他一直都喜欢我？ All this time? - 我得去找他谈谈 - 他人在中国啊 - I've gotta talk to him. - He's in China! 他指的是国家喔 The country. 等等 他的班机四十五分钟后才起飞 Wait, his flight doesn't leave for 45 minutes. 那时差呢？从这儿到机场的时差？ What about the time difference? From here to the airport? 没错 Yes! - 你赶不及的 - 我总得试试 - You're never gonna make it! - I've got to try. 瑞秋 你要对他说什么？ What are you gonna say to him? 我不知道 I don't know. 那你就不该去 Maybe you shouldn't go. 对 如果你是去伤他的心 那就不用急于一时 Right, because if you're gonna break his heart, that can wait. 对 但如果是好消息 那就马上去告诉他 Yeah, but if it's good news, tell him now. 搞不好等我看到他就会知道 Maybe I'll know when I see him. 好吧 这样有帮助吗？ Here, look. All right, does this help? 没有 No. 我只知道我等不了一个礼拜 这件事太让人震撼了 All I know is, I cannot wait a week. This is just too big. 我得跟他谈谈… I've just got to talk to him. I've got... - 待会儿见了 - 瑞秋 我爱你 - I'll see you later. - Rachel, I love you! 先跟我谈啊 Deal with me first! 好 All right. 罗斯 罗斯 Ross! Ross. 不好意思 借过 Excuse me, pardon me. - 您的登机证呢？ - 嗨 - Hi. Your boarding pass? - Hi. 我没有登机证 我只是有事得跟我朋友谈谈 No, I need to talk to my friend. 抱歉 没有登机证就无法进去 Sorry, you're not allowed on the jetway unless you have a boarding pass. 他刚进去 就在那里 穿蓝色外套的那个 我可以… He just went on. He's right there, in the blue jacket! Can I just...? 抱歉 这是联邦法律规定 I'm sorry. Federal regulations! 好 那你可以帮我传话吗？ All right, um, then could you please just give him a message for me? 拜托 我有重要的事跟他说 Please? This is very important. 好吧 你想说什么？ All right. What's the message? 我不知道 Uh... I don't know. 不好意思 先生 先生？ Excuse me! Sir! Excuse me! Sir? - 有人请我传话给你 - 是什么？ - I have a message for you. - What? 瑞秋说她很喜欢你送的礼物 她会等你回来 It's from Rachel. She loved the present. She'll see you when you get back. 什么？ What? 托碧 我不知道她在说什么 Toby, I don't know what she's talking about. 没有瑞秋这个女人 There's no Rachel! 不要跟我冷战 Don't give me that deep freeze! 噢 乔伊… Oh, Joey, Joey, Joey! 我想我刚失去了知觉 I think I blacked out there for a minute. 这不算什么啦 It was nothing. 现在换你享受啰 Well, now we gotta find something fun for you! 等等 Ahh, you know what? 别管我了 你再来一次吧 Forget about me. Let's, uh... Let's give you another turn. 我再一次？ Me, again? 有何不可？ Sure. Why not? 哇 有人明天会拿到一个超大的水果篮 Boy! Somebody's gonna get a big fruit basket tomorrow! 我得说 乔伊 你跟我想象中的完全不一样 I gotta tell you, you are nothing like I thought you would be. 什么意思？ How do you mean? 我以为你是凡事只想到自己的男人 I just had you pegged as one of those guys who are always, "Me, me, me!" - 哈 - 可是你… - Ha, ha. - But you... 竟然这么替别人着想 ...you're a giver. 你是我见过最大方体贴的男人 You're, like, the most generous man I ever met. 你根本就是个女人 I mean, you're practically a woman. 瑞秋 你要把包装纸留起来吗？ So, uh, Rach, do you want to save this wrapping paper? 只有点破 It's only a little torn. 你想跟罗斯在一起吗？还是我该把这东西给丢了？ Are you gonna go for it with Ross, or should I throw it out? 我不知道 我不知道 I don't know. I don't know. 我去的时候一直在想… Thought about it all of the way there... 回来的时候也一直想… ...and I thought about it all the way back and, uh... 竟然是罗斯 You know, it's Ross! 你们知道我的意思吗？我跟罗斯耶 You know what I mean? It's Ross. - 是啊 - 是啊 - Sure! - Sure. 我不知道 我的直觉告诉我… I don't know. This is just my initial gut feeling... 我想 ...but I'm thinking... 这样应该会很棒 ...it'd be really great. 天啊 我也这样觉得耶 我们会变成朋友兼亲家 Oh, my God, me too! Oh, we'd be like friends-in-law! 最棒的是 你对他已经很了解 The best part is you already know everything about him. 感觉就像第十五次约会 It's like starting on the 15th date. 对啊 一开始就像已经约会十五次了一样 But it would be like starting on the 15th date. 说的好 Another good point. 我的意思是… No, I mean... 通常约会到第十五次 双方就应该已经在交往 At the 15th date, you're already in a "relationship-y" place. 确定要在一起了 You're committed. 唔… Huh. 如果事情不成怎么办？ What happens if it doesn't work out? - 为什么会不成？ - 不知道 有时候就是会这样 - Why isn't it working out? - I don't know, sometimes it doesn't. 他不够帅吗？还是赚的钱不够多？ Is he not cute enough for you? Does he not make enough money? - 不是啦 我只是… - 也许她有别的对象 - No, I'm just... - Maybe there's someone else. 是吗？你还有别的对象吗？ Is there? Is there someone else? - 没有啊 没有别人 - 那你… - No, there is no one else. - Then why the hell... - 干嘛甩掉我哥？ - 什… - ...are you dumping my brother? - Wha...? - 嘿 大… - 嘘 - Hey, big... - Shh! 慈善家 Spender. 她还在睡觉 She's still asleep. - 结果怎样？ - 太神奇了 - So how'd it go? - It was amazing. 你知道那种自认很行的感觉吗？ You know how you think you're great in bed? 你会问我那种问题 就代表你根本不了解我 The fact you'd even ask shows how little you know me. 昨晚我没办法表现... Well, it's like, last night I couldn't do the thing... 拿手的技巧 ...that usually makes me great. 所以我只好想别的办法 So I had to do all this other stuff. 结果我得到的回应超赞 老兄 不是我自夸 And the response I got! Man, oh, man. 好像去参加碎纸花游行一样开心 It was like a ticker-tape parade! 我知道 我房间离游行路线非常非常近 Yes I know. As it happens, my room is very close to the parade route. 那种感觉真的很棒 不只是她 我也觉得超赞的 It was amazing, and not just for her. Uh-uh. For me too. 那种感觉就像是 我突然间看不见了… It's like, all of a sudden, I'm blind... 可是其他的感官却都变敏锐 ...but all my other senses are heightened. 我好像可以体会到… You know? It's like, I was able to appreciate it... 另一种层次的喜悦 ...on another level. 我不知道你还有层次感官 I didn't know you had another level. 对啊 我之前也不知道 I know. Neither did I! - 哇 这件裙子真漂亮 是你的生日礼物吗？ - 是的 - Hey, great skirts! Birthday present? - Yeah. - 谁送的？ - 你送的 - From who? - From you. 我把你送的衬衫拿去换了 I exchanged the blouse you got me. 心意最重要 Well, it's the thought. 罗斯的班机不是快到了吗？ Doesn't Ross' flight get in in a couple hours? 我记得是在登机门27B At gate 27B? 对 Uh, yeah. 摩妮卡 我想了很久 Monica, you know, I've been thinking about it. 我觉得我不该跟罗斯在一起 I've decided this Ross thing is not a good idea. - 为什么？ - 因为我会觉得 - Why? - Because I feel... 我不只是在跟他交往 ...like I wouldn't just be going out with him. 你们大家都会变成我约会的对象 I would be going out with all of you. - 我会有压力… - 没有压力 没有压力的 - Ugh, there'd be all this pressure and... - No pressure, no pressure! 摩妮卡 我们八字都还没一撇 你就已经这么… Nothing has even happened yet and you're already so... 我哪有 好吧 I'm not "so." 一开始我是觉得有点怪… I was a teensy bit weird at first... 可是我发誓不会给你们压力 ...but I'll be good. I promise. 是谁？ Who is it? 是我 卡尔 It's me, Carl. 上来吧 Come on up. 你背着我哥偷吃？ Behind my brother's back? 像这种话 我绝不可能会对你说的 Is the kind of crazy thing you won't be hearing from me. - 七百块 - 太棒了 你办到了 - Seven hundred bucks. - All right, you did it. 家里有水果吗？ Do we have any fruit? 真是可怕的两个礼拜 Man, hell of a two weeks, huh? 你知道吗？我觉得我从中学到很多 You know what, though? I really feel I learned something. 你还要继续"凡事以她为主"吗？ So you'll stick with this "it's all for her" thing? 你疯了吗？ What, are you crazy? 一个盲人恢复视觉之后 还会这样走路吗？ When a blind man gets his sight back, does he walk around like this? 我只是说 如果再让我看到… I'm just saying, if I see one more picture of Ed Begley Jr... 艾德•贝格利在电动车里的照片 ...in that stupid electric car... 我就会自杀 ...I'm gonna shoot myself! 我并不是反对环保… Don't get me wrong. I'm not against environmental issues, per se... 我只是讨厌那个家伙 ...it's just that guy! 没想到你竟然宁愿跟他出去 而不是我 I can't believe you'd rather go out with him than me. 抱歉 我正在约会耶 Excuse me, please. I'm trying to have a date here. 好 那就停止想我啊 Fine, just stop thinking about me. 做不到是吧？ Can't do it, can you? 我是在想你 那又怎样？ So I'm thinking about you. So what? 我不懂 这个男人到底哪里好？ I don't get it. What do you see in this guy anyway? 他似乎是一个好人 Well, he seems to be a very nice guy. 拜托 你好歹也买部真正的车吧 I mean, come on, buddy! Get a real car! 瑞秋 给我们一个机会吧 Rachel, come on. Give us a chance. - 罗斯 这对我来说太难了 - 不… - Ross, it's too hard. - No, no. 为什么？因为大家会觉得很怪吗？ Because it'll get weird for everyone else? 这是我们两人的事 Who cares about them? This is about us. 我从初三就开始喜欢你了 I've been in love with you since the ninth grade. - 罗斯 你算是我最好的朋友 - 我知道 - You're, like, my best friend. - I know. - 如果我们分手 而我失去你的话… - 哇 - If we broke up, and I lost you... - Whoa. 你为什么会这么想？ Why do you think we'll break up? 你有谈过没分手的恋爱吗？ Have you been involved with someone where you haven't broken up? 没有 No. 可是这种事只需要发生一次 But it only has to happen once. 我们都知道我们是天生一对 You and I know we are perfect for each other. 对不对？ Right? 所以唯一的问题是 你喜欢我吗？ So the only question is: Are you attracted to me? 我不知道 I don't know. 我从来没把你看成恋爱对象 I mean, I've never looked at you that way before. 那就从现在开始吧 Well start looking. 哇 Wow. 没错 Exactly! 这个白痴会害我… And you just know I'm gonna be the guy... 塞在车阵中的 ...caught behind this hammerhead in traffic! - 对 - 嘿 - Right. - Heh. 你说的对 You're right. - 你知道吗？ - 什么？ - You know what? - What? 我刚想到我得去机场接朋友 I forgot, I'm supposed to pick up a friend at the airport. 我很抱歉 I am so sorry. I'm so... 如果你想留在这里把这喝完 请自便 If you want to stay and finish your drinks, please do. 抱歉 我得走了 抱歉 I'm sorry, I gotta go. I'm sorry. 可是… But... 抱歉 借过 抱歉 Excuse me! Pardon me! Excuse me. 不好意思 I'm sorry. Ha, ha. 托碧 拜托 你别这样好吗？ Toby, for God's sake, will you let it go? 根本没有瑞秋这个女人 There's no Rachel! - 嘿 我来拿 - 哦 - Oh, hey. I got that. - Oh. - 谢谢 甜心 - 不客气 - Thanks, sweetie. - No problem. 我等不及要把你介绍给朋友们 I cannot wait for you to meet my friends. 是吗？你觉得他们不会批判挖苦我吗？ Really? You don't think they'll judge and ridicule me? 他们会 可是我… No, they will. I just, uh... - 就是等不及 - 等不及 - Can't wait. Heh. - Can't wait. 得了 他们一定会喜欢你的 Come on, they're gonna love you.